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*All-NSFL Teams - SouljaBoy2007 - 06-25-2019
Hello everyone!! Welcome to this article! Today I will be picking unofficial awards that won't be recognized. If HO likes this idea maybe we can switch to pro bowl to a fan vote and make this official but probably not. Anyway, let's get going.
All-NSFL First Team
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Offense
QB: Childish Gambino
Oh gosh who else would it be. It’s almost as if the MVP is always really good at playing football. He is far and away the best QB in the league. He broke his own passer rating record by 3 points and broke the passing TD record set by hall of famer King Bronko. Nobody else in the league even has an argument to be the best QB this season because of how much better Gambino was than everyone. He had nearly 20 more touchdowns than the second-highest passer, who had a solid year of their own.
RB: Marquise Brown
Another guy who was locked into this position for a while. Brown continued his reign as the NSFL’s best running back. He led everyone in rushing yards, rushing touchdowns, carries, and total touchdowns, along with being 6th in YPC in rushers with over 50 attempts. His top-level efficiency on the league’s highest volume of touches makes him one of the best running backs ever to play in this league.
WR1: James Bishop
I know that all-pro teams are based on numbers and not on impact or surroundings, but I think James Bishop should get some extra points considering his situation. He was on a team that won one game and was quarterbacked by the corpse of Micycle McCormick. James Bishop accounted for more than half of Micycle’s passing touchdowns this year with 11 and he also led the league in yards. One of the few bright spots in a dark year for the Yeti.
WR2: Vincent Valentine
This was a really tough decision between Maddox and Valentine. In the end I just selected randomly with the help of Ryan Leaf Jr. Maddox had the edge in touchdowns but Valentine had more yards and more receptions. They both benefited greatly from Childish Gambino’s historic season. Valentine is tied for second in the league in touchdowns and is also top 5 for receiving yards and yards per catch. He did the most he could with every touch and that’s why he is the second best WR in the NSFL for 2030.
FLEX: Errol Maddox
I thought long and hard about who would get the second WR slot. Then I scrolled down and remembered I had a flex spot. Maddox led the league in touchdowns and also crossed over the 1000 yard mark. Maddox did just barely sneak into the first team, as Vander Jones had a strong year as well and if he was a bit better in the passing game he probably would’ve gotten this flex spot.
TE: Verso L’Alto :hawks
Every key skill player on the Hawks offense made the first team. I’m not trying to be biased, they were just that good this year. Originally I didn’t think L’Alto had that good of a year, then I remembered that blocking is a part of being a tight end. L’Alto was one of the league’s best blocking tight ends with 37 pancakes and just one sack allowed. These great blocking numbers went along with a solid receiving season with 647 yards. He only had 2 touchdowns but it’s mostly because there were so many options on this Hawks team.
OL: B. Ones, S. Pooky, J. Tyler, D. Probincrux III, M. McKoutchie <<bots that were ok
Defense
DL: Luke Smyles
I hadn’t ever heard of Luke Smyles. He’s not a super well known player, but this year was great for him. He was tied for first in TFLs and is towards the top of the league in sacks. He’s not a super high TPE guy but it doesn’t really matter if he performs like this. He did a great job this year of getting into the backfield and disrupting plays.
DL: Footballer Sackerman
Over a sack a game is going to help a team a lot. Sackerman did that, with a league-leading 16 sacks. Outside of the sacks his contributions weren’t huge, but leading the league in sacks will get you a spot on the first team. He was a big part of the dominant San Jose defense that managed to get them to an Ultimus before being burned to the ground by Childish Gambino.
DL: Kwame Abayomi Mbafeno
Mbafeno was one of the best edge rushers in the league this season. He had 12 TFLs and 6 sacks. Defensive line doesn’t always put up the flashiest numbers so to make this selection I had to look for guys who weren’t quite at the top statistically, but were pretty close to it in multiple stats. Of the players who were top 10 in TFLs, Mbafeno was second in sacks and the one who was first in sacks(Luke Smyles) is on the team. A great season for the Ultimus champion.
LB: Raymond Vans
Unbiased. To be fair, even if Vans wasn’t on my team I’d give him this spot. He had a hell of a year. 2nd in tackles and also had 6 sacks, 5 TFLs, and 10 pass defenses. He also managed to help force a turnover by recovering a fumble. Linebacker looks like a position where it’s easy to pick up stats and Vans had some of the best stats in a very solid group. I’m an Outlaws fan but there’s no bias here, Vans was one of the NSFL’s best linebackers in 2030.
LB: Ben Horne
Ben Horne had a very solid season where he acquired 12 sacks and 15 pass defenses. He was able to make a big difference in the passing game. The Ultimus champion wasn’t a huge factor in the rushing game, with just one TFL but his talent for getting to the QB and breaking up passes makes up for it. He’s top 10 in sacks for the whole NSFL and among people with 10 pass breakups or more, he is tied for first in sacks with Danny Grithead. Danny made the list so I feel like it would be unfair to put two people with nearly the same statistics on different teams.
LB: K.J. Becker
Becker and Horne had very similar seasons, although Becker was just a tiny bit worse. Horne had 2 more sacks but Becker had a forced fumble and one more TFL. He did this for a pretty solid Liberty team that only allowed their opponent to score more than 30 in 2 of their 14 games. In my opinion, K.J. Becker is probably the worst of the first-team linebackers but either way he still made it and that’s what counts.
LB: Alex Selich
Selich was absolutely phenomenal in coverage. He was very good at rushing the passer, with 9 sacks, but his stats against the pass are what really earned him this spot. 16 pass defenses and 2 interceptions are solid for a cornerback, good for a safety, and absolutely incredible for a linebacker. To go along with these stats he added 103 tackles and 9 sacks. Selich might have been the best linebacker in the league this year. I think that if the awards committee isn’t stupid, he should get a DPOY nomination although I don’t think he should be the winner. The winner is directly under this entry.
CB: Arbin Asipi III
Arbin Asipi had a historic year at CB. Dermot Lavelle has even said that Asipi’s season was better than his best year when he won DPOTY. AA3 had 9 interceptions, one short of the all-time record and 20 pass defenses. The craziest statistic of this, however, is probably his 3 defensive touchdowns. He was one short of the record once again. The best part about this season to me is that it came out of absolutely nowhere. In season 14 Asipi was a serviceable starter for Baltimore, with 2 picks and 15 pass defenses. I don’t know what changed to make Asipi perform this well but whatever caused it deserves praise.
CB: Ryan Applehort
Ryan Applehort also had a historic year, though his actually set a record. He set the pass defense record with 33. That’s a really impressive number, and he also had 3 interceptions. No other CB except Asipi performed better than him and that’s why he has a spot on the first team. His season wasn’t as crazy as Asipi, but it was a record-setting year that kind of went under the radar with Asipi’s flashy stats.
S: Danny Grithead
Danny Grithead didn’t have a typical safety season, but Danny Grithead isn’t a typical safety. He is a crazy good run support guy. He got a lot of tackles this year, which is normal for him, but he also had 12 sacks from the FS position. He didn’t get any interceptions this year, but he had 14 pass defenses and forced 2 fumbles. Just because he wasn’t getting interceptions, doesn’t mean he wasn’t a great safety. I think his contributions to the Otters deserve the recognition I’m giving him.
S: Jeff Jefferson IV
How the hell did this happen? He has 182 TPE. Somehow he defied the sim and managed to get 6 interceptions, good for second in the league. This went along with 94 tackles, a pick six, and a forced fumble. He had an all-around great season where he was towards the top in terms of safeties in several different categories. Maybe everyone should bank their TPE so that they can play this well. Everyone try that and we’ll see how it goes.
Special Teams
K: Alex Frost
Unfortunately for him, Frost has gone inactive. That means he will probably not see that someone he’s never heard of gave him an award that doesn’t count. Either way, he was the most efficient kicker in the NSFL, just barely edging out Kulture Future in terms of total kicking percentage, a stat name that I made up. This statistic (percentage of XP+field goals made) is why I gave Frost the nod even though Future was the KotY. Frost also had an insane volume that comes from him playing on the best offense in the league. There was a kicker (Ramero) that kicked half as many extra points as him and missed more. Dean Jackson was right in his poem, a kicker can go inactive and succeed but never know. It’s simultaneously happy and sad at the same time.
P: Kulture Future
He was a good kicker but probably a better punter. Third in the league in punting average and first in punts inside the 20. The people ahead of him in terms of punt average weren’t even close in terms of pinning people in bad field position. Future might be the best all around special teamer in the league, at least this season.
Returner: Lennox Garnett
Since I’m too lazy to pick a PR and a KR, I’m picking the one who’s best at both. Garnett averages 30 yards per return and he had a 108 yard kick return touchdown. He was second in punt return average as well. He does these averages on a high volume as well. I think there is an argument for Danny Grithead but he’s not quite as good as a punt returner, though it’s not by a large amount. Garnett just barely keeps Grithead from getting his second spot on the first team.
All-NSFL Second Team
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Offense
QB: Andrew Reese
Unbiased. But seriously Reese was very solid this season. Joliet Christ stole his pro bowl spot despite having 8 less touchdowns and more interceptions. Reese struggled a bit with completion percentage but his TD/INT ratio is really good. He was second in touchdowns and second to last in interceptions, just behind what might be the greatest passing season in the history of the league. Reese bounced back from a pretty bad year in season 14 to being one of the league’s best QBs and after Gambino retires they may be an argument for him being the best.
RB: Vander Jones
Jones had a case to be on the first team but I decided to put Errol Maddox in the flex spot but that’s not to detract from what Jones did this year. After a phenomenal season in the DSFL playing cornerback, Vander switched to running back and had a 1200 yard season. His receiving stats weren’t completely amazing but they were solid, with 280 yards on almost 50 receptions. He had 9 totals touchdowns to go along with this and for his debut season in the major leagues he came onto the scene with a BANG!
WR: Sunnycursed
Sunnycursed, the man with no last name, had a very good season. The Hawks absolutely filthy passing attack prevented him from making the first team but his stats and performances are worthy of praise. He was just 24 yards behind league-leader James Bishop and he also had 9 touchdowns. He finished 4th in receptions as well and was a key contributor for an Otters team that made the playoffs.
WR: Kazimir Oles
Kazimir Oles, who is now playing for Chicago because he is a player-GM a la Michael Jordan, had a strong year yardage-wise although he didn’t catch that many touchdowns. 6 touchdowns isn’t awful but all of the other people that made the teams have had double digit touchdowns. However, of all the people left that could take this spot, he had significantly more yards than the 2 people who have more touchdowns than him. There are some people who think Chicago can contend for an Ultimus and if Oles can perform like this then they might have a decent shot. Expansion is stupid.
Flex: Tyler Swift
Tyler Swift might have been the most versatile player in the NSFL in season 15. He had 10 receiving touchdowns and was over 1000 rushing yards. He had 600 receiving yards as well and while I’m much too lazy to verify this, I would assume that he is probably top 3 in yards from scrimmage. I know that the surroundings and impact on a team probably shouldn’t matter when selecting these awards but I think he should get some points for catching more than half of his team’s passing touchdowns.
TE: Balthazar Crindy
The tight end position is kinda weak. Even Verso L’alto, who is regarded as the best in the league, had a down year. Balthazar had a solid season during this dark time. He hauled in an impressive 79 catches and also had more than 750 yards. Tight ends don’t catch a lot of touchdowns for some reason and his 3 touchdowns are second among tight ends behind Declan Harp. This was a great season for the 63 year old and it’s truly impressive how well he’s held up over the years.
Defense
DL: Joey Sachs
The Yeti had a really bad year. It’s not their worst (that would suck for them), but it was a season with very few bright spots. One of these bright spots is Joey Sachs, who made a huge impact in the rushing defense for Colorado. His 16 TFLs led the league and his 4 sacks, while not an impressive number, were actually pretty solid among defensive linemen. I feel bad for players like James Bishop, Joey Sachs, Mo Berry, and soon-to-be Yeti Wolfie McDummy. If you can read this, get out before it’s too late.
DL: Thorian Skarsgard
Thorian Skarsgard isn’t a stat-sheet stuffer. However, in the things he’s good at he is one of the best in the league. Skarsgard only record stats in 3 categories this season. One of those categories in sacks and he finished tied for second in the NSFL for sacks. Defensive line doesn’t put up crazy numbers a lot of the time, so 12 sacks is a hell of a season. Congratulations Thorian!
DL: D’Pez Poopsie
Defensive line standouts are running thin. Poopsie, now on the Butchers, might have had the only really good defensive line season that I haven’t already mentioned. Outside of his low tackle count he was one of the league’s best pass rushers, getting 8 sacks. His 5 TFL aren’t amazing but they’re solid and don’t hold him back from getting a nomination. Poopsie can say that he was unofficially the 6th best defensive lineman in the NSFL, as selected by someone named after a bad rapper from the mid-2000s. Rest on your laurels D’Pez.
LB: Leighton Lee
Unbiased. Leighton Lee had a great rookie season. I’m just joking about half of that, he’s not a real rookie. He did have a great season though. Lee broke the 100 tackle mark and was a force against the pass. His 16 pass defenses were first among linebackers, tied with Alex Selich. Lee added 6 sacks to go along with this. Leighton Lee was honestly pretty close to taking a spot on the first team but KJ Becker just edged him out. If Leighton Lee can maintain this success than maybe he can approach the level that his older brother reached.
LB: Kolby Deringer
As I’m doing this article, I’m starting to realise how good the sabercats defense actually was last season. 4 of their defensive starters have made my teams. Kolby Deringer is one of those 4. If he had more tackles he would have a case to have made the first team, especially with the success of his team. 86 tackles is still pretty solid but his real value comes from his sacks and pass defenses. He had 9 sacks to go with 12 pass defenses and he helped lead San Jose to being a step away from the promised land.
LB: Sandip Bakshi
Linebacker is a strong position and I think Bakshi being on the second team really helps to illustrate that. He had a really good year and yet was barely top 5 for linebackers in terms of season 15 as a whole. His 125 tackles were 4th in the NSFL and he also pulled down 3 interceptions. Bakshi didn’t make a big difference in the running game and he also was unable to get to the quarterback as much as some other linebackers. I do believe that his tackles and interceptions make up for his subpar season in some other statistics.
LB: Austin Roenick
Roenick had a lot of tackles and not a lot of anything else. His 126 tackles are second amongst linebackers but he didn’t place anywhere near that highly in any other statistic. His TFL count is ok, with 5. Austin did force 4 turnovers, by picking off one pass and recovering 3 fumbles. Roenick was a key contributor on one of the best teams in the NSFL who managed to make an impact even while surrounded by many other great playmakers.
CB: Axel Hornbacher
Jeez. I know it’s to be expected of the Ultimus champions, but the Hawks are so stacked. Both of their starting corners are all-NSFL. Hornbacher managed to pick up 4 interceptions and 23 pass defenses, both tied for 3rd in the league, even while playing across from a man who had one of the best defensive seasons in league history. Axel also managed to pick up his first ring with his third team. After requesting a trade, he was flipped to Baltimore and in his first season with the Hawks his amazing contributions helped get them an Ultimus.
CB: Johnny Snuggles
Somehow the man with the least intimidating name possible manages to perform well enough that QBs are scared of him. He had almost identical pass coverage stats to Deon Taylor but he put up a TFL and also recovered a fumble, which allows him to just barely edge out a player that I wish was able to make the team in Deon Taylor. Maybe next year Deon will make it. I have nothing against Johnny, I am just a big fan of Taylor because of my time with the Solar Bears. Snuggles had a great season and I bet opposing offenses wish he lived up to that last name a bit more.
S: Mason Brown
Mason Brown hit a big milestone this year. He is just the 3rd player ever to get 100 tackles in their career. For him to do that this year took a monumental effort from the aging star. Brown managed to get 134 tackles, which led the league, and he also played a big part in forcing turnovers for Orange County. Brown had 4 forced fumbles, which also led the league, and he had 2 interceptions. Mason Brown’s run support abilities were on full display this season and I personally think that his milestone locks him into the Hall of Fame even though that is not my decision.
S: Jaylon Broxton
A pretty solid swan song for Broxton. His interception total of 4 was second amongst safeties this season and his 20 pass defenses were first for his position. He has expressed some disappointment in how he performed after he changed his name while at his retirement announcement but I personally think he did just fine, at least this season. Congratulations on your award that doesn’t count, Jaylon. Enjoy retirement, the league will miss you.
Special Teams
K: Kulture Future
Alex Frost just barely edged out Future to be on the first team, mostly based on the sheer volume of kicks he had. Future led the NSFL in field goal percentage with 96.2% and his extra point percentage was a passable 94%. If Kulture Future had a better extra point percentage he would be a lock for the first team in my eyes. He was the Kicker of the Year along with being the punter of the year. Alex Frost had a better season in my opinion but Kulture is the best kicker in the NSFL at the moment.
P: Stephen Harris Jr.
I’m going to be honest here, I have no idea what stat to look at to pick a good punter. Stephen Harris didn’t have a very good punt average but he was second in terms of punts inside the 20. What this tells me, without having watched most of the Wraith’s games, is that he is a bit of a wizard at pinning people back when the offense stalls out in a bad spot. This is a very useful skill for a punter to have and that’s why I’m giving this spot to the man who kicks footballs well in front of like 20 people in Northern Canada.
Returner: Danny Grithead
This man just signed a large contract to go play in Yellowknife and while it’s a lot for a safety, I think at least to a small degree they are paying for his special teams contributions. He led the league in kick return average and also averaged nearly 10 yards per punt return. Him and Garnett are just about neck and neck but to be honest I felt like giving someone else a nod for the first team as opposed to putting one guy on there twice.
All Rookie Mentions, credit @ValorX77
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Only season 15 because those are the only rookies I recognize
QB: Franklin Armstrong
S14 DSFL MVP, led Portland to two Ultimini appearances, Easily one of the best players to enter the league
RB: Forrest Gump
Very like-able, and of course, breaking the DSFL single season touchdown record, and a 96 yard TD.
RB: Morgan Marshall
FabV member, Part of a three man rushing attack, Stud in development
WR: Brock Landers
WR: Rod Tidwell
WR: Ahri Espeeyeeseetee
TE: Chase Jensen
TE: Cameron Olson
S: Richard D'attoria V
Good guy, decent safety, really cool name
Code:
word counts: 3896 for SouljaBoy2007, 97 for ValorX77*All-NSFL Teams - WALDO - 06-25-2019
snubbed
*All-NSFL Teams - PDXBaller - 06-25-2019
Another reminder...
*All-NSFL Teams - infinitempg - 06-25-2019
(06-25-2019, 06:26 PM)SouljaBoy2007 Wrote:If HO likes this idea maybe we can switch to pro bowl to a fan vote and make this official but probably not.
It's been discussed but I think the current consensus is to stick to the Pro-Bowl. We've done fan voted awards before and that eventually turned into meme-voting.
This is a great article though!
*All-NSFL Teams - ValorX77 - 06-25-2019
@SouljaBoy2007 needs more defensive players for the rookie team.
*All-NSFL Teams - 124715 - 06-25-2019
Dang I'd rather be on all-rookie than all-nsfl anyways :eyes:
*All-NSFL Teams - SouljaBoy2007 - 06-25-2019
(06-25-2019, 07:48 PM)PDXBaller Wrote:Another reminder...Of what?
*All-NSFL Teams - mabb - 06-25-2019
(06-25-2019, 07:48 PM)PDXBaller Wrote:Another reminder...:'(
*All-NSFL Teams - iseedoug - 06-25-2019
Love it
*All-NSFL Teams - DeathOnReddit - 06-25-2019
(06-25-2019, 08:40 PM)SouljaBoy2007 Wrote:Of what?
That im better. Hehehe