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+---- Thread: (S28) Ultimus Week (/showthread.php?tid=31809)
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - dude_man - 05-03-2021
6. So this PT is going to be a little interesting as this is more of a plan of mine for the league and me sharing my experience with it so far. As some may have noticed, it seems like I applied for pretty much every position the league has to offer as far as jobs are concerned, which to that, I would say you are correct. But by doing so, I think with that I’m able to learn the inner and outer workings of the league, while supporting it to the best of my ability. With that being said, I will be going through my experiences so far of said league jobs as well as what my final plan for the league will be.
Earlier in the year I applied for multiple jobs, including updater, banker, and Player Progression team, but I was not accepted for either one. Desperate to find something, I noticed that DSFL Simmer was open not knowing what that exactly entailed besides needing Draft Day Sports Pro Football. I applied on a whim and answered questions regarding it. I hadn’t heard anything in a few days, so I figured the position was filled. However, to my surprise, Bex reached out to me for a different position. Intrigued, I asked her what it involved, and basically described to me a Sim Head position. At this point, I didn’t expect to be accepted for anything else, so I took it, and with that, I became the DSFL Sim Head.
Working with Numbers is great as he is the DSFL Simmer for the league. Basically I reach out to each GM in the DSFL with their individual line, and ask for the team’s weekly strategies and depth charts, and remind them of what the deadline is to turn it in. I then supervise Numbers as he enters the strats and DC’s the teams have compiled on a google sheet. I’ll add input whenever is needed just in case a certain strat needs corrected. After that, Numbers ensures I’m watching his screen to make sure the simming of the games is all valid and that there’s no fiddling with the file. After the games are streamed, I add the sim file to the general public so that people can use it for testing or any other means that they would use it for. And that basically describes the Sim Head responsibilities. I also update the index for the league as well, but that requires DDSPF to be able to update it.
Throughout this season, it’s been a blast building relationships between the DSFL GMs as well as overall HO. It also is great to see the workings of management within the league. A lot of work is involved as well as coordination and communication. Without that, there can be chaos involved, but everyone seems to chip in whenever somebody needs help. There’s a lot of great, meaningful discussions that totally do not involve ranting about 90’s-00’s punk rock music or things like that. Overall, I’m glad I’m Sim Head and recommend anyone that’s interested to go for it whenever there’s an opening, cause let’s be real, I ain’t planning on letting this job go anytime soon. With that being said, I would keep applying for jobs, and that brings me to PPT.
So PPT was an interesting position to go for because it was right after HO’s decision to have Kya step down as PPT Head. I had actually applied for PPT Head as well trying to go for either position. As I had stated earlier, I applied for PPT earlier in the year and didn’t get it. I went for it anyways because maybe they’d take me a second time, and with that, they did. Once I got there, it was a lot to take in. I wouldn’t say it was a bad thing, but more like more than what I bargained for. With management changing, there was a lot to take in and things were still being structurally changed. After things were settled a bit, I was able to finally dig in and find out how things worked. For predictions, a bot is used to grade people’s choices for each week. I also grade rookie point tasks to make sure they are correct with the grading diagram that’s provided for us. Overall the PPT is a blast to be a part of and the team helps each other out in every aspect that may be needed. Plus sidd is a cool dude to work for.
And I’m even applying for more jobs! So you may ask, why do you do this dude_man? Well to be quite honest, I really want to get into HO. My means of doing so is more than likely a bit unorthodox, but think of it as me trying to basically Undercover Boss this sucker. If I’m able to work different positions within the league, I’m able to add different inputs to HO within the league and help out in a different manner. But with that being said, I need to get into HO first, so it looks like I need to apply for one more position!
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - BOOM™ - 05-03-2021
Tier 3: Written/Graphics Tasks (Each must be either 200+ words or a graphic)
Choose up to FOUR for 2.5 TPE each.
18. Graphic Option: Create a graphic of your player with your teammate who exhibits a team-friendly attitude.
![[Image: ptlucid.png]](https://i.postimg.cc/m22dwj8f/ptlucid.png)
TE Buffalo Hunter(L) shares a win with one of his favorite teammates, DE Lucid Dreams after a recent game. Lucid exhibits all of the qualities that teams look for when recruiting/scouting and wherever he ends up he will be an incredible asset to the franchise.
19. Graphic Option: Design a menu for your team's stadium.
![[Image: londonmenu.png]](https://i.postimg.cc/ncR3wmPs/londonmenu.png)
24. Create a billboard, magazine cover, unique trading card, or video game cover depicting a one of the league's stars.
![[Image: lucidgame.png]](https://i.postimg.cc/sg27q0hy/lucidgame.png)
29. Affliate PT from either SHL/PBE/GOMHL. The Weeks must match with the timeframe of this UW
PBE PT Username UZI
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - TakaMori152 - 05-03-2021
17. Your team has announced that they will be laying ground on a new stadium next season. What additions would you like to see included in it. Graphic Option: Create a field / stadium design for your team.
Kiara Tenoh is on the Minnesota Grey Ducks, so they should have a bird themed stadium. Not in a weird way, though. It should have the sort of twisted metal look of the Bird’s Nest in Beijing, China. The design should be similar to that, with a lot of exterior beams that look like the twigs on a bird’s nest. There shouldn’t be a roof because sports were meant to be played outside. And also, if there was a roof birds wouldn’t be able to come to hang out and watch the game in the rafters. Which means that instead of a roof, there should be a significant overhang for birds to be able to sit on while watching the Grey Ducks.
If there’s an exterior metal shape, then maybe there could be some sort of interior color coming from the stadium. Like the one stadium that’s already in Minnesota, the soccer one that glows at night. It’d be cool if the Grey Ducks’ stadium glowed whenever they were playing and each player could choose a specific color it glows when they score a touchdown. Kiara would choose orange, like her hair. The glow at night would also help the birds see where they’re going and direct them towards the stadium for the game.
19. Theres a prompt about stadium design, but now lets dig deeper. Each stadium serves some concessions for the fans coming in to watch the games. Talk us through their menu. Graphic Option: Design a menu for your team's stadium.
With Kiara Tenoh, the Minnesota Grey Ducks are saved when it comes to the menu at the Grey Ducks’ stadium. Because of her personal history in fast food, she was able to help bring mountains and mountains of fried chicken to be a part of the stadium’s menu. And because there’s so much food, it’s priced really low for its quality. Only top quality chicken from Kiara Fried Phoenix! The other food of course includes the mashed potatoes, the biscuits, and all the other wonderful parts of the KFP menu. The only thing they were not able to bring over was the takoyaki, which was blocked by a contract dispute with TakoEats. But Tako Bell is in talks with the Grey Ducks to have their own stand.
Outside of the KFP menu, the Grey Ducks have all the normal stuff a stadium has, like personal pizza, popcorn, pretzels, and plenty of soda. It was average and boring. But it was thanks to Kiara that they were able to spice the place up (with her 11 signature herbs and spices). Now everyone can enjoy as much fried chicken as they want at Minnesota Grey Ducks games while watching Kiara zoom around on the field!
21. Make a scouting report for any of the ISFL or DSFL draftees. Show their stats, abilities, TPE, or highlights. Written or graphic option available.
Since I’m new to this league, I’m going to write about Kiara Tenoh! Kiara is brand new and hasn’t actually played any games yet, but she’s been very eager to show off what she can do. She’s already been signed by the Minnesota Grey Ducks, which means that teams are already taking notice of her. She zooms up and down the field as the running back, but can also catch the ball too. She’s not very big and can’t break too many tackles, but she’s very good at recovering from injuries. Since she’s a phoenix, she can withstand any tackle thrown at her with everything still intact, including her enthusiasm. Kiara will not be deterred!
With her enthusiasm, Kiara will try her best every day! She’s already been working hard at her training since coming to the ISFL and is doing everything she can to prepare for the coming DSFL Draft. This is her first time doing anything like this, which is surprising given how many different lives she’s experienced. Because it’s so new to her, this is especially exciting and she wants to do everything right so she can impress all of the people in the ISFL. Kiara Tenoh should be drafted very high!
26. Imagine your current position was not available to be picked when you created your player. What other position would you have picked, and why?
There were two other positions that Kiara Tenoh considered when she decided to play football. The first was Quarterback. Kiara saw the way that they were the star and wanted to be on center-stage on the football field. Unfortunately, it seemed that quarterback was a very difficult position and would require a lot more training than Kiara knew. She would have to learn to throw the ball and call plays. It would also be tough because there are apparently already a lot of quarterbacks in the ISFL already, so she wouldn’t be able to get a role.
Kiara decided that it would be between runningback and wide receiver. She wanted to use her speed and show how good she is at flying up and down the field. Maybe Kiara would’ve been best as a wide receiver, bursting past the cornerback on every play to get downfield and make the big catch, but she decided on runningback. At runningback, she could run AND catch. But if she weren’t able to be a runningback, then Kiara Tenoh would’ve been a wide receiver. And if she did choose to be a wide receiver, she’d be the best. With being able to focus just on running past her defender, Kiara would be able to go even faster.
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - 124715 - 05-04-2021
2. Tell us about your draft class. Is there anything that makes it special in comparison to other classes? Where did your fellow draftees land, how are they doing? Did anyone turn out to be an unexpected steal of that draft based on what you know today? Do you think anyone in your draft class will become a hall of famer? If you’re new to the league, how do you think your class will do? Where do you think people will get drafted to?
Those who know me shouldn’t be surprised that I picked the draft prompt. I often talk about sim league drafts as being my favorite part of leagues, and now as the S29 class prepares themselves to be drafted into the big leagues next week it’s been two seasons since my draft class was drafted. And, not to be overly harsh or anything, but my draft class was pretty bad. Teams were lucky to get even two good starters from the draft.
First overall was me, Eleven Kendrick-Watts at WR. The Honolulu Hahalua’s main need was DL, but WR was a bit of a sneaky need for the future. I haven’t actually come up yet, though, meaning the Hahalua probably could have afforded to wait on WR.
TPE rank in class: 2
TPE rank in position: 1
Redraft pick: Marlon Brando, DE
Brando is the highest TPE DL in this class as well as a universally beloved user - Honolulu needed both. A fairly easy pick.
After me was the first somewhat surprising pick of the round, CB Lawrence Miller to Baltimore. Baltimore’s needs could be described more or less as “yes”, and the ideal strategy here would have been BPA. At the time, it was a good pick - with overdoo being a GM in another league he’d be expected to care less about the long strings of losses Baltimore surely had in its future. His earning hasn’t been up to par, but he’s been a starter for Baltimore this season.
TPE rank in class: 15
TPE rank in position: 2
Redraft pick: Eleven Kendrick-Watts, WR
Kendrick-Watts has as much TPE as every current Baltimore WR combined. With him, Baltimore could have gotten a headstart on the rebuild of their offense instead of relying on all players from one draft class to form a core.
Third pick was our first true bust, RB Xander Creed. It sucks because Bandit was one of the best users in the class and a complete joy to share a team with in Kansas City, but I understand some real life issues prevented him from sticking around. Hope to see him back someday.
TPE rank in class: 27
TPE rank in position: 7
Redraft pick: SparkySparky Boom-man
It’s easy to just take Madison Hayes, the best hindsight RB, here. But holy cow have you seen the state of that defense? Massive holes at every position. Only Matt Cross is actually a defensive star. Boom-man is the best remaining defender and fills a position of need as it becomes a position of need.
After Creed came the original draft position of DT-turned-DE Marlon Brando. Berlin is surely very happy with this pick, and with Brando on the defense they’ve turned into one of the ISFL’s premier squads. There’s not much to say here - they’d pick him again if they could.
TPE rank in class: 6
TPE rank in position: 1
Redraft pick: Maui Waialiki, DE
Unfortunately, they can’t. Brando went off the board first overall in this re-draft, meaning Berlin has to look elsewhere. Fortunately for them, there’s not very far to look. Just two TPE down the board is Maui Waialiki, whose user is a HO intern.
Right after Brando was the original spot for SparkySparky Boom-man, who’s been a good earner so far as well as a Yeti legend and well-loved presence in the LR. He’s also been a great earner.
TPE rank in class: 5
TPE rank in position: 1
Redraft pick: James Wilkinson, TE
The Yeti don’t really have many holes on their roster. They often prefer to draft by user rather than need, and snagging the class’ top earner fifth overall is pretty good in that department. They could switch either him or Michell, or just run with two TEs.
Duke Cheeks went off the board sixth overall, which was widely mocked in point tasks and articles if I recall correctly. The pick looked good at the time and looks just as good now, though if the complexion of this draft’s WR class were different that could have been a smart choice.
TPE rank in class: 9
TPE rank in position: 1
Redraft pick: Duke Cheeks, LB
I don’t want to change picks just for the sake of changing them, and I don’t see why San Jose would either. With Cheeks and Trop, they knew exactly what they were going to get and that’s always going to be good value at the 6th overall pick.
The seventh overall pick was Bean Beanman. He’s had a great rookie season, racking up double-digit sacks and being a true contender for the prestigious DRotY award. He also fills a need on Orange County’s talented but struggling defense.
TPE rank in class: 12
TPE rank in position: 3
Redraft pick: Bean Beanman, DE
While putting the 3rd highest TPE DE at 7th overall feels rich, it truly is the best pick the Otters could have made. There are 13 top earners in this class, followed by a precipitous 60 TPE drop into the vague “casual earner” group, and Beanman is the last DE in the top group. A good pick.
This was just the first half of the first round of S27, but I thought it was an interesting exercise. Also, just to expand on what I said earlier, there are 13 players above 570 TPE… and 13 players above 520 TPE. Joseph Radetzky is 14th with 516. Definitely one of the shallowest classes in memory.
900+
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - Suggs - 05-04-2021
Tier 1, Task 4: 4. “Sim gonna sim” is a popular expression in the league. Write about teams that have been graced by the sim gods and had amazing performances despite statistical odds, and/or about teams that were considered favorites but may have dealt with some bad sim luck that hampered their efforts. How much of an impact did it have on their season(s)?
If there is one expression common to the ISFL that everyone that will eventually run into, no matter how active you are or committed to understanding and closely following the games is the good old “sim gonna sim”. It means that sometimes, no matter how much effort GMs put into building their rosters and how many hours they spend simming for one single game, it may all end up going down the drain because the game engine decided that it was best that your team ran the ball on 3rd and 5. And to some extent, I don’t really like the idiom. Financial Analyst Michael Mauboussin wrote a book in 2012 called The Success Equation: Untangling Skill and Luck in Business, Sports, and Investing. In it, he managed to calculate how much luck goes into deciding standings of all 4 major American sports and soccer. And Football ended up being the 2nd most lucky sport, behind somewhat surprisingly hockey. The complexity of the game and the matches (16 regular season games and 1 game per playoff series, which is nothing in comparison to other sports, that can play as many as 10 times more matches per season) make upsets a common theme in our league. So the same way one can say “sim gonna sim”, one can also say “football gonna ball”. I understand that I am overanalyzing a simple expression that is mostly used for comedic effect, but alas.
My distaste for this expression does not make it less accurate, however. As in real sports, some teams are luckier than others. And I’m here to show which teams were mathematically the luckiest and the unluckiest.
For this, I’m going to use the method of Pythagorean wins. It was first developed by the father of sabermetrics, Bill James, yet has since been adapted to other sports, including football. Since all games are won by teams that score more points than their opponent, the formula estimates how many games a game should have won based on their points for and points against, using the formula PW = (PF^(2.37))/((PF^(2.37))+(PA^2.37)*16). It is also important to say that one shouldn’t expect a big surprise here, since these stats aren’t made to surprise people, but to mathematically confirm what we already know. James himself once said that sabermetric statistics “are not intended to tell you anything at all about the player that you do not already know.”
So now, onto the teams themselves. Firstly, I will talk about the luckiest teams, the ones where their real wins exceeded their theoretical wins the most.
We’ll start off with the NSFC champions: the Berlin Fire Salamanders; who won 12 games, yet were projected to win 9.6. It is tough to call #1 NSFC seed and the #2 overall seed lucky, and for good reason. They have a great roster, have made great progress from the last few seasons, and deserve to be atop the standings. Yet maybe 12 wins might be a little bit too much. They have 11 games where they either lost or won by 1 possession, winning 8 out of 11. Some include a W1 win against Philly on a 15 point 4th quarter comeback; a W3 win against NYS with another 4th quarter comeback, now by 13 points; a W6 win against the Yeti with, you guessed it, another 4th quarter comeback, now by 10 points, and a W15 win against Chicago with an 8 point 4th quarter comeback. I believe a team that wins by so few points with so many comebacks once or twice a season can be really called lucky. A team that has that many wins? Not really. They also suffered their own comebacks against Chicago and the Yeti, as well as losing by a single point against the Wraiths. After the Wraiths unexpected win against Sarasota in the Wild Card game, who knows how the NSFC would look like with Berlin and Yellowknife in the wildcard and a bye for the Wraiths?
The second luckiest team this year, again, according to Pythagorean wins, were the Honolulu Hahalua, who 9 games, despite being expected to win just below 7 games. This one is tougher to defend. Whilst Berlin had an average margin of victory just below 10, with a 9.6 point difference/win, Honolulu had an average of 4.4. They won just 2 games by more than 4 points and were the only team to go above 0.500 having allowed more points than they scored. Yet again, this doesn’t take credit away from their work. They stopped their opponent from scoring at all in the 4th quarter on 4 of those 7 close games and only conceded a Field Goal in 2 other, which makes a lot of sense. Their defense line includes some of the best in the league and allowed the 3 least yards and points in the entire ISFL. But again, you need to outscore your opponent to win, and that was tough for Honolulu. If they had conceded a couple more touchdowns or field goals, they could have easily gone below 0.500.
Now for the real proponents of “sim gonna sim”: the unluckiest teams.
I will start off with the second unluckiest team in the year, since the unluckiest one is a special case and something I think all reading expect, the New Orleans Second Line, who reached the Ultimus last season through a string of results that were, ironically, opponents claimed they won through “sim luck”. This season, they had the least games won compared to their Pythagorean expectation, with only 5, despite an expected 6.6, but again, I’m opening an exception here for first place. They conceded a lot of comebacks and close losses, such as a 1 point W1 loss by a last minute field goal against San Jose; a 3 point loss the next week against Honolulu; followed by 14 loss to Austin where they failed to score a single point in the 2nd half and conceded 24; another comeback loss to the Silverbacks, who scored 10 in the 4th quarter; and a W10 loss to the Silverbacks with another double digit comeback by New York. Despite what the math might show, this really did not affect much on their season. Most expected NOLA to have a negative season filled with player regression, and that happened, as they claimed the 2nd worst record in the league and the 2OVA pick in the S29 ISFL draft as a consolation prize.
I’m not going to make a big speech here because we already know who’s here, it’s the Chicago Butchers, the team some have gone so far as ironically point out they were fixing matches against themselves (again, an obvious joke). Things were looking good for the Butchers early on, as they had won a close game against the reigning Ultimus champions in W1 with a 4th quarter 10 comeback at home, blown Baltimore out by almost 20 points in W2, and had seemed to clinch a win against Philadelphia with a FG by kicker Sam Sidekick, which got Chicago a 2 point lead with 5 seconds remaining, meaning the Liberty would have to return a kickoff for a touchdown to win it! They did. In W5, they lost to the Wraiths after conceding a Field Goal with 45 seconds remaining. In W9, they lost to San Jose after conceding a 63 field goal with 19 seconds on the clock. On W11, they faced Sarasota and were winning with 19 seconds on the clock, until the Sailfish scored a 51 yard field goal, which made the scores tied with both teams at 34 points. Sarasota made the kickoff, which resulted in a touchback. This meant they had the ball at their own 25 yard line. They proceeded to pass three times, and have some completions, yet not enough to get a first down. Which meant they obviously punted went for it with a run play, failed to gain yardage, and conceded a last second field goal, which lost them the game. I don’t care what the stats say, what were Chicago’s expectations for the season, and what could have been. This deserves a thousand-word article of its own. Stats are supposed to just mathematically state what we already know yet have not already expressed in concrete concepts. This needs no concrete concept. I cannot say for sure that they were the unluckiest team in ISFL history, but I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, they were the unluckiest in Season 28. For those curious, they won 6 games, despite 7.5 Pythagorean wins expected. Not that it matters anyway.
(1436 words)
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - krazko - 05-04-2021
10. Tier 2: Short Form Tasks (Each must be 400+ words) 5 TPE
Calvin Hobbes was born in Göteborg, Sweden to his parents Bob and Emma. They moved to Chagrin Falls, Ohio when Calvin was only 9 years old.
He had started with American Football early after seeing the Ultimus game when he was unable to sleep one night. The very next day he begged his parents to buy him a football so he could play. And he played, a lot… He was out every day it was not raining, running, playing with his stuffed tiger, Thomas Hobbes. It was obvious from a very early age that he had talent for the game and that he was unusually quick for his age, but unfortunately there were no teams in the neighborhood in Sweden. So, when his parents received the offer to move to Charing Falls for work, they took it not only for themselves, but for little Calvin as well.
The young Calvin thrived in the new area where he could finally play football in an organized way with a proper team and coach. Calvin quickly established himself as a very speedy player and was moved from his early Quarter Back position to Wide Receiver relatively early in his career. Calvin exceeded the coach’s expectation in his new position and could easily outrun his opponents and their defensive side. He was moved up to the older teams 2 years before the normal age in, and he still managed to score 5 Touch Downs in 12 games his first year.
Calvin only became quicker and soon no one in the league could catch him and it was not unusual for him to score 2-3 Touch Downs a game and he could quite easily determine the outcome of the games on his own.
All while he was playing in his teams, he kept on running and playing with his pet tiger. When he was asked about it during his sophomore year, he mentioned it was against Thomas Hobbes he got the best practice, because his tiger would hold nothing back and aim to annihilate Calvin any chance he got. Calvin also mentioned that’s where he had the chance to try and just run, no thought about anything else, just what he enjoyed the most.
During his college time he did struggle early as the opponents were much tougher and quicker than his old opponents and teammates. However, he did grow and become dominant in his position there as well, even if it was not as dominant as he was earlier in his career.
Now we’re excited to look forward to the future and what Calvins experience in the ISFL will be.
Will he be a force to be reckoned with or will he bust?
16. Tier 3: Written Tasks (Each must be either 200+) 2.5 TPE
Calvin Hobbes will bring an active player that is keen to improve and create a good atmosphere in the locker room. He will bring a speedy Wide Receiver that will do as much as possible to improve and contribute as much as possible to whatever team ends up drafting him.
By selecting the newcomer Calvin Hobbes, a team is giving a new player the chance to prove his worth and grow into the community and team. Calvin Hobbes ambition is to earn as much TPE as possible to become the best player possible in a short amount of time. He is keen to learn and develop as a player and will gladly listen to suggestions from the General Manager or anyone else in the team regarding build or path to take to achieve the goal of being the best possible player.
If it is anything to go by, his alter ego in the Simulation Hockey League (also Calvin Hobbes) is among the top TPE earners in his class over there and that is an achievement Calvin Hobbes of the ISFL wants to reproduce. That means there will be some media, daily activity on the forums and more to ensure the possibility and goal is met, both for himself and for whatever team does end up drafting him!
29. Tier 3: Written Tasks (Each must be either 200+) 2.5 TPE
Affliate PT from SHL
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - Ace - 05-04-2021
2.5 TPE - Tier 3 - Task 18 – Ultimate Team Player
@Sebster
My boy Willie Miller must be the no-brainer choice for ultimate team player. He’s the wingman at the bars that takes down the 4s so you can bring the dimes home, he’s the straw that stirs the drink. According to the Center for Management & Organization Effectiveness, a Great Team Player is characterized by 7 big attributes –
1) They Understand their Role – My boy Willie knows his role. It’s to break up big plays and look damn good while doing it.
2) They Embrace Collaboration – Willie knows I am better at interceptions than him, so he watched a crap ton of my film and copies me now.
3) They Hold Themselves Accountable – When Willie showed up to practice in crocs, he knew the heat was coming and he welcomed it.
4) They Are Committed To Their Team – Willie purposely doesn’t gain a lot of TPE to ensure he can stay down with the Royals as long as possible.
5) They Are Flexible – Willie can do a split.
6) They Are Optimistic and Future-Focused – It just was announced that the Royals had their best regular season record ever. The first thing that Willie said? “Until next year.”
7) They Back Up Goals with Action – When we needed a big play in last nights game, you know who stepped up? The man, the myth, the legend. Willie came up with a HUGE pick and we scored a touchdown on the drive immediately after. That’s an ultimate team player.
2.5 TPE – Tier 3 – Task 23 – Halftime Show
Welcome to the Ultimus Halftime Show! We’re here overlooking the field where a massive silhouette of an ass has been assembled as a stage. There’s been no formal announcement of a musical guest for today’s festivities….
The lights drop, and a spotlight shines down on the middle where the ass’ hole should be. A trap door opens, and a platform protrudes from the gaping hole. Suddenly, Weird Al Yankovic is there, with a tuba! He is serenading the die hard ISFL fans with some of his famous songs, which include White & Nerdy, Fat, Eat It, Smells Like Nirvana, and Like a Surgeon. His musical prowess is captivating the crowd, which seems dumbstruck! They love his talent so much that they’re throwing gifts of their stadium purchased food at him! Do you know how much money that corn dog cost? $8.99! That’s quite the tip!
OH! What’s this? A second performer! Carrot Top has come onto the stage and is dancing around with some props! We’ve never had an Ultimus Halftime show quite like this! I can’t wait to come back to arrange it all again next year!
OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING SOMEONE HAS COVERED MY FACE WITH A BURLAP BAG AND I AM –
2.5 TPE – Tier 3 – Task 26 – Positions
I chose cornerback because it was made abundantly clear that the “sexy positions” are always well saturated and hard to carve out regular, reliable playing time unless you’re a known commodity with the ability to max-earn. It was disappointing – I wanted to be a Derek Henry style RB that could run 30 yards with half the opposing team draped all over me. With my last player, I started off as a RB but shifted to DE to accommodate my team’s needs. DE is fun and all, but I was bored with it. Cornerback is fun as it’s sort of the anti-wide receiver, it falls on the CB to stay right with the opposing “sexy player” and ruin their experience. It’s kinda trolly, and that’s something that I find entertaining. But if I could possibly roll it back and go with a position I truly wanted to play, I’d play as a Tight End or a Running Back. I’d love to put points up on the board. Interceptions and broken up passes are fun, but unless you can get a pick-six, you’re not seeing that number on your team’s side of the board go up at all. That’s my biggest gripe with the current saturation of positions.
2.5 TPE - Tier 3 – Task 29 - SHL PT Affiliation - https://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=115770&pid=3031446#pid3031446
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - Opera_Phantom - 05-04-2021
13. Expansion Expansion Expansion! The league seems to love talking about it, but it has still not happened. Tell us why it should happen / should not happen soon?
Expansion in the ISFL. Sometimes it seems like this word is a bit tabu, everyone is scared about it but every once in a while it surfaces again. While i do not know about all the details people analise when a league expansion is decided, so my opinion might fall a little bit short in some aspects, i do feel like the most important aspect of it is "user league experience". And at the moment, that aspect is hindering the experience of some users. Maybe not all obviously, but at least a fair part of them. And that is why i really feel expansion is needed in the league.
I do not want to come out very hard on this, but It has to be said that some users (a group where i include myself) do not care about the DSFL at all. I mean, i do care about the users there, especially the new ones we need to pay attention to help with league retention but while the teams are cool, the locker rooms are decently active, i do not want my player to be playing there for a lot of time. In an ideal world, considering i am a "max earner" and do not play as a QB (this time), i would play 1 season in the DSFL, get drafted by an ISFL team and play for them immediately on the next season. And, fair play, while that happens sometimes for some users, the vast majority has to wait one season, or even 2, to finally be called up to play in the major league. Would expansion fix this completely? Maybe not, we would still have QBs, RBs, TEs, positions where the roster space is not very big, that would have players stay down until they had a chance, but with 2 or 4 new teams, we would see a lot more rookies getting called up sooner rather than later. And they could still remain a big part of the DSFL, with their locker room and league experience, but at the same time playing in the league 99% of users want to be in.
Again, i do know expansion needs to be thought of very carefully, so that the league does not have to go back in a few seasons and contract, as user retention is not perfect, but it would definitely be a step in the right direction. In my opinion at least. So i hope expansion comes soon.
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16. This task is exclusive to recreate/non-recreate rookies of the S29 class and later. The season is over and the draft is coming up. What do you bring to a team, and why should a team choose to take a chance on you next season?
The Season was over pretty soon for the Norfolk Seawolves, so i had plenty of time to think about the draft that is coming in less than 10 days. I really fought myself regarding my intentions with this new player, thinking about my league enjoyment and all that, and after being out of the ISFL a while, i found myself checking the index only to see how AZ was doing, if they are winning games and in a playoff position, if the players with options were staying or leaving, how is the roster set for the next years and stuff like that. This made me decide that i do want to go back to Arizona with Cue Jr., if the General Managers, scouts and everyone in the team wants me there. If they do, and considering i am a good earner, near the top of the class, they should draft me in the first round if i am still on the board. If they decide to go another route, it becomes clear that they do not value my player as highly as i do, so it all becomes fair games after that.
Nevertheless, i have good league friends in every team, so wherever i land, i will definitely be ok.
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26. Imagine your current position was not available to be picked when you created your player. What other position would you have picked, and why?
As strange as it might seem, i really enjoyed my career as Jay Cue, the Quarterback. Do not get me wrong, it is hard on the mental part to always be looking at your stats every game to see where did you mess up, and if that destroyed your team chances. But even with all the disappointment, the unlucky seasons, the lack of playoff games and the loss on the only one he had, i still had a lot of fun. This made me consider very strongly on creating another QB to try the new sim and check if i could get better stats.
But then i decided that, and being QB a very niche position in the league, i should make way for other users, new and old, to try, as a full career is pretty much 1 real year.
After this, i was going with Corner, as it looked 1 position where you really needed to be a max earner to help your team. But then i started talking with a few users that played as one, and apparently stats are a bit hard to come by. Not that i care a lot about them, but it is always nice to check the index and see that your player made an impact.
So i went with RB. Why? No idea. I wanted offense, so it seemed pretty nice.
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RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - IsaStarcrossed - 05-04-2021
4. “Sim gonna sim” is a popular expression in the league. Write about teams that have been graced by the sim gods and had amazing performances despite statistical odds, and/or about teams that were considered favorites but may have dealt with some bad sim luck that hampered their efforts. How much of an impact did it have on their season(s)?
One of the most common phrases in this league is that the sim is going to sim. While I would like to spend this time writing about my poor Yeti and the times they were messed up this season by the sim doing silly things, after a thorough review of their games I think I have to lean towards the Chicago Butchers in season 28 potentially being the team who got the short shaft from the sim more than any other team in league history.
Lets start from the beginning. After getting started off fast with two wins, one of which was against arguably the best team in the conference in Sarasota, they went into a game against the hapless Philadelphia Liberty. They held a lead through most of the game but with 22 seconds left on the clock, the Liberty managed to kick a field goal to take the lead for the first time in the game. That wasn't enough though. The sim gave Chicago hope by allowing them to get off a massive return and a long pass that set them up for a field goal to put them back in the lead with 5 seconds left. One may see this and say well, that isn't a curse. But then on the ensuing kickoff Philadelphia's Flash Panda returned the kick 102 yards for a walk off touchdown, leading to Chicago losing their first game of the season.
Two weeks later against the Yellowknife Wraiths, Chicago was now 2-2. They were looking to bounce back and get into the race again. The game came came down to the wire once more as YKW took the lead with 45 seconds left in the game off the back of a massive 48 yard field goal. The Butchers managed to drive down and put themselves in range to tie it back up. With 9 seconds left on the clock and a first down, they had time to try to run one more play to get a bit closer for their field goal. Instead they went for the 52 yarder and missed it, putting an end to the game.
The following week, now 2-3, the Butchers got to face their most glaring moment of the sim is going to sim when they played against the Arizona Outlaws. It was a tight game and Arizona drove down the field and scored a field goal with a minute and fifty seconds left on the clock.The way the game had gone, that was more than enough time for Chicago to drive down and take the lead back. Except the game just ended at that point. For some reason, the sim decided that Chicago just didn't deserve a chance to win that game. 1:50 on the clock in the fourth quarter, Arizona up by three, and the game was called. Never before had I seen such a blatant moment of the sim deciding that one team should win and the other should lose. This wasn't the end for Chicago though.
Chicago managed to tie things back up on their season after dealing Berlin their first loss of the season and taking down the Otters. Now at 4-4, it was time for them to face the San Jose Sabercats. Once again the game came down to the last minute. Chicago had taken the lead with 58 seconds left. Their defense held admirably and forced the Sabercats to kick from the 46 yard line. The Sabercats nailed in a massive 63 yard score that put them up by two. Chicago still had a bit of time left and they hit a wide open receiver who somehow got chased down after 51 yards despite having a 20 yard lead on the nearest defender, putting an end to the game. Once more the sim clearly did not want Chicago to win this one.
After a fairly even loss against Yellowknife, Chicago fell to 4-6. With 6 games remaining in the season, there was still a chance to bounce back. That said, their next game against Sarasota was the one where I realized the sim truly hated this team on a deep, unimaginable level. With 1:35 left in the game and up by three points, Chicago managed to drive the ball all the way down to Sarasota's 33 yard line. They got held up and it was obvious they should kick and extend their lead. It was a fully manageable 40 yard kick. Instead, they punted to Sarasota. This immediately let Sarasota drive down, kick a field goal, and tie the game with 19 seconds left. It seemed the game was going into overtime. Until Chicago went for it on 4th down at their own 33 with 4 seconds left on the clock. Now at the exact same spot Chicago was in roughly 80 seconds before, Sarasota did not punt. Instead they kicked the field goal to win the game. This was the ultimate "heck you" to Chicago.
Just a couple weeks later after their season was already out of reach, they gave Baltimore their only win of the season, solidifying the true hate that the sim had for Chicago. Had Chicago won the games that the sim didn't screw them out of, this is a team who was potentially sitting in first place in the NSFC at 11-5 with tie breakers over both Berlin and Sarasota. In this universe, it is them and not Sarasota who makes playoffs. It was a true disaster for this team at no fault of their own. It was purely the sim deciding Chicago was going to be bad.
RE: (S28) Ultimus Week - Pooter - 05-04-2021
Tier 3
The season is over and the draft is coming up. What do you bring to a team, and why should a team choose to take a chance on you next season?
One thing that I believe I can bring to a team that you may not here a lot about is humility. I’m extremely humble about who I am and what I bring to the football field. Because of my size I know I can’t go up and beat two tall defenders on a contested catch like a 6”5 receiver can. That is not my game. What I can bring to the table is incredible speed, quickness, and razor-sharp route running. I use my speed to my advantage in my routes. I don’t care how tall or lengthy a defender is, if he can’t keep his feet underneath him when guarding me then I will burn him all day long. Another thing I take tremendous pride in is my hands. I don’t like dropping passes – at all. I will stay hours after practice with the jug machine just working on my hands. Which highlights another thing I am really big on – work ethic. I strive to be a better player and person every single day. If I haven’t made a positive impact on or off the field that day, then that day is a failure to me. “Strive for greatness, big or small” is a key motto of mine.
Your team has announced that they will be laying ground on a new stadium next season. What additions would you like to see included in it. Graphic Option: Create a field / stadium design for your team.
While I don’t have a team yet, I can think of a few cool ideas for my dream stadium. First of all, it needs to have the most technologically advanced video boards that money can buy. And not just one or two big ones, but many of them all across the stadium. I also think it’d be incredibly cool to have video projection on the roof of the stadium, similar to a few setups that we are currently seeing today. A big must-have is great wi-fi service in the stadium. There’s nothing worse than a fancy stadium with poor internet service. I want our fans to be able to broadcast and share our victories instantly across the world. As for the players, I’d want a decked out locker room. A game room, a spa and pool area, and really cool lockers as well. Each locker would be personally customized for that player. There would be built in TVs and a gaming console as well. Another big addition would be a really fun fan area where the fans have the ultimate experience. Similar to the locker room, it would be decked out with a game area, a family zone, a bar, a restaurant, and all sorts of other amenities.
Imagine your current position was not available to be picked when you created your player. What other position would you have picked, and why?
Besides WR, I was really split between creating a QB or HB. After thinking about it, I realized QB would not be the best option for a brand new player as there is only one starting QB for each team and the competition would be very steep. I would have to commit a lot of time and effort to really go far with that, and as a newbie that might be a bit too much to start off with. I almost created a HB but I also realized it would be a similar situation as with the QB conundrum. There can only be 1 or 2 HBs on the field at once, and a HB room is usually carrying around 4 guys or so. The competition and real-life effort would be daunting for a newbie like me. With that said, due to my player’s size and speed, he could definitely play HB if needed. He has the natural field vision and the shiftiness to make defenders miss. He would be a lethal thread out of the backfield as well with his hands and route running ability. He could also potentially play on the opposite side of the ball as a corner, but I think his instincts lend themselves better to the offensive side of the ball.
Football is a game that has been going on for a while, loved by fans all over. But what if you were able to make some rule changes? Talk us through your new version of football, and what would be different and why.
There would be a few interesting changes that I would make, personally. Even though I’m an offensive player, I do feel as though modern football has really crippled how defenders play the game. I would try to find a good balance between the old-school and new-school rules. Defenders should be able to hit QBs and WRs without worrying about a penalty or an ejection all of the time. Pass interference has also become a bit ridiculous over time as well. You should be able to hand-fight more going down the field, as long as you aren’t pulling down receivers or something very blatant. On the offensive side of the ball, I do think HBs should be called for facemasks way more often. It simply isn’t fair that they can grab and throw down defenders by the facemask, but the opposite results in a penalty. Another interesting change would be to get rid of the extra point. It almost serves no purpose as most are basically automatic. I do away with it and have the offense go for two every single time. I could see that resulting in some really thrilling game enders. I also much prefer the college overtime rules over the professional version, and would like to see that implemented on all levels of the game.