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+---- Thread: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight (/showthread.php?tid=46307)
*which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - slumped64 - 07-18-2023
Welcome to ISFL mascots I could beat in a fight. Now I did the DSFL mascots, now we are moving up to the big boys, the ISFL mascots. Disclaimer: This is entirely satire so please take everything I say with a grain of salt.
Scale:
A meaning I'd ragdoll them
B meaning I'd have the advantage
C meaning it'd be evenly matched
D meaning they'd have the advantage
F meaning they'd ragdoll me
Baltimore hawks: DNow hawks are birds of prey, meaning they are carnivores, and can fly. Double whammy. Catching a bird mid flights isn't a simple task to complete, better yet a hawk. Hawks also have long sharp talons that could easily pierce my skin. Now I could try to ambush the hawk and catch it by surprise when their not expecting it, but there's a pretty low chance of me actually succeeding with that. They don't use the term "Watching like a hawk" for no reason.
Capetown Crash: FIf you think I'm going to be able to beat a whole ass rhino in a fight you're delusional. They are giant creatures with a massive horn. They are also very quick on their feet. I have absolutely no shot of beating this dude in a fight, unless I had a gun but that would ruin the whole point of this thread. F
Austin Copperheads: CNow copperheads are very swift, and venomous snakes. Their bite could leave some damage, but it wouldn't be enough to kill me. Its small size and speed would make it a challenge to apprehend, but if I can play the waiting game I could grab it by the neck and absolutely whip the hell outta that snake. That's if I can catch it. I'd have to be careful to not get bit though, ecven though it's not fatal, it could cause some damage. For now i'll keep it at a C.
New York Silverbacks: FThis a whole gorilla. Basically a human but 4x bigger, 12x stronger, and wayyy sharper teeth. It's either not fight a gorilla or die. Not up for debate.
Berlin Fire Salamanders: AWhile fire Salamanders are interesting, exotic animals, they aren't much of a threat to people. While they have a poisonous mucus on their skin, it's not potent to humans, and couldn't be fatal, unless you digest a lot of it. Just one stomp and it should be done.
Sarasota Sailfish: FThese are massive fish that are some of the quickest fish in the ocean, with a giant sword on their face. No chance im killing one of these things with my bare hands.
Honolulu Hahalua: DIf im not mistaken these are stingrays, and typically stingrays are pretty docile, unless provoked can jab you with their lethal tails. If I can spot the stingray from a distance I could possibly grab it by the tail and prevent it from stinging me, but they are able to camouflage which would make it difficult. Huge pain in the ass to deal with, so I'll stick with a D.
San Jose sabercats: FSabercats are carnivorous cats that have the teeth the size of your hand. Nope. Not much else to say.
Chicago butchers: DI assume these are just dudes with kitchen knives which immediately puts me at a disadvantage, I wouldn't say F just because it's another human, but the knife causes me to have a disadvantage.
yellowknife wraiths: FA wraith is basically a ghost so how am I supposed to kill a ghost. They're already dead. I physically cannot fight this mascot.
orange county otters: BOtters are cute little creatures, but have pretty big teeth and are rather territorial. They are quite small which gives me the size and strength advantage, but they can bite. Now the bite wouldn't be lethal but it would hurt like a mf. I could most likely beat up an otter. Too many factors in my favor.
Colorado yeti: FYeti are huge mythical creatures with sharp teeth and claws. I wouldn't put up a fight for this creature at all. F
Arizona outlaws: DOutlaws are criminals, meaning they're ruthless, and have nothing to lose. I think that they would most likely have the power advantage on me, which would be difficult for me to deal with. They would use everything to their advantage, like rocks, sticks, bricks, etc. Since they are human, there is a chance I wear them out and secure the W. But the chances of that happening are less likely. For now we'll stick with D.
New Orleans Secondline: CI don't really know what a Secondline is, so for this one we'll go with C.
There you have it folks, these are the ISFL mascots I can and can't beat in a fight. I can make more parts to this, like what if I have a baseball bat, or if I'm 6'5 280, or whatever. This is just a fun little media piece I wanted to write. (Again this is satire so don't take anything i said seriously)
RE: which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - MMFLEX - 07-18-2023
@Dewalt27 get rekt nerd
RE: which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - Dewalt27 - 07-18-2023
(07-18-2023, 05:02 PM)MMFLEX Wrote: @Dewalt27 get rekt nerdIs this Docile? Strays savage af.
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - ztarwarz - 07-18-2023
I always thought the Hahalua were manta rays...in which case you have a less dangerous animal but a whole, whole lot bigger.
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - slumped64 - 07-18-2023
(07-18-2023, 08:42 PM)ztarwarz Wrote: I always thought the Hahalua were manta rays...in which case you have a less dangerous animal but a whole, whole lot bigger.I have no idea honestly lol
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - ztarwarz - 07-18-2023
Just checked, yeah, Hahalua is the Hawaiian name for the Manta Ray.
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - Crodyman - 07-18-2023
I also thought it was a sting ray when i designed the mecha for hon. Oops.
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - Raven - 07-19-2023
Yup Honolulu's mascot is a Manta Ray
RE: *which ISFL mascots could I beat in a fight - Jay_Doctor - 07-19-2023
Secondline would be someone with some sort of brass instrument in their hand