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+---- Thread: *Pistol News Network Interviews Bradley Madlad (/showthread.php?tid=5754)
*Pistol News Network Interviews Bradley Madlad - Molarpistols - 10-30-2017
[div align=\\\"center\\\"]Pistol News Network Interviews Bradley Madlad
The Orange County Otters Lineman Speaks
A Pistol News Network (PNN) Exclusive Interview
[/div]
Changes abound in the National Simulation Football League as preparations are being made for the start of pre-season football to kick off the fourth season of our beloved league.
Chief among those changes has been the players along the offensive line threatening a strike if something wasn't done about playing conditions and offensive line depth. The league's front office mulled over the topic, seemingly forever, before it was decided to allow artificially intelligent 'bots' play along the offensive line.
Upon hearing the announcement, many of the NSFL's most prominent offensive linemen decided to swap positions to a more glamorous, star-powered role. We've seen Matt Akselson, Avon Blocksdale, and Wallace Stone former offensive linemen for the Yellowknife Wraiths, Baltimore Hawks and Las Vegas Legion, respectively, make the switch to Quarterback.
Several other players around the league have also moved, including star Orange County Otters tackles Angus Winchester and Greg Clegane. Often overshadowed by these two, another Otters offensive lineman has decided to make a position change. Today, our reporter Mr. Pistols, sits down for a one-on-one interview with him, his name is Brad Madlad.
BM: That's actually Bradley Theodore Madlad, thank you. I'm excited to be here talking with you.
MP: We're excited to have you here as well. A lot of people want the big-name interviews, but we feel there can be some interesting viewpoints from the league's lesser known players. We'll start off with your history in the league, what caused you to try out for the NSFL, more specifically as an offensive lineman?
BM: That's a good question, your mother - I mean MY mother always said I was "a little on the husky side". At 320 pounds, I tend to agree with that. I decided to try to find a career where I can throw my weight around, and the NSFL seemed like a decent place after seeing my friend, Ian Bavitz make a name for himself as a linebacker there. I tried out, and was drafted in season two by the Philadelphia Liberty. I had a quiet time there, and Bavitz put in a good word for me and the Otters ended up trading for me. I've been making my home in Orange County ever since!
MP: That's very interesting, but you skipped the bit about why offensive lineman?
BM: Ah, right, I figured the 'husky' bit kind of covered it, but since we're trying to bloat the word count I can touch on it a bit more. I had the extra weight laying around, which helps out with being an offensive lineman. I also liked the idea of offensive lineman because I like being a team-player. I play a lot of Dungeons amd Dragons, and like all my characters end up filling whatever hole the party has left over. In the NSFL, that was easily offensive line. I've started each game in my career, not necessarily because I was really good, but because I play an in-demand position.
MP: So how do you feel about the league deciding an android is better at your job than you are?
BM: Well, when you put it like that, I feel like I should go all 'South Park' on this, you know "DEY TOOK ER JERBS!" and stuff. Really I'm not offended by it at all. I think the decision will help the league as a whole because there were too many either empty offensive line positions, or ones filled with people like me that have earned 100 TPE since season two.
Overall, I'm pretty excited to try something new.
MP: Have you decided what position you want to try out next?
BM: Well, I think I've pretty much set myself up to become the Orange County Otters Kicking Specialist. I used to play a TON of hacky-sack in college, and dragging my fat butt around has made my legs rather strong, believe it or not. The leg strength gained from that, and the fine-tuned abilities learned from hacky-sack should make me a pretty decent kicker.
The Otters have had a really good kicker once in their history, when they picked up a star on the waiver-wire, Ronaldo. Unfortunately, they let him go in the draft after and they've been stuck with mediocrity or inactivity. While I can't say I'm a huge upgrade from season three Pro-Bowler Al Sims, I can say that I'll continue getting better very slowly with my point tasks and activity checks. My buddy has a leadership role on the Otters, so he's definitely going to stick on my case to keep up with the league and help the team.
Basically, I just want to help the team any way I can and Kicker seems the best way to do that.
MP: Kicker? Aren't you a wee-bit hefty for that?
BM: Right now yeah, but I've got a liposuction surgery scheduled for soon, so I'll be up and running pretty quick at a new and improved size for my kicking job. I'm real excited to get started on it, and it'll be interesting to look in the mirror afterwards!
MP: How do you feel your offensive line brethren like the changes? It seems to be just fine for you.
BM: Yeah, like me, it allows us to swap out to a more favored position, so I think a lot of the guys will like that. I know my teammate Angus Winchester has been advocating for a change like this for quite awhile now, so I know he's excited. It'll be fun to see a different statline for myself other than something like '3 pancakes and 1 sack allowed'. I think OL around the league will get a big boost to their fun, and likely their egos from this change, but it'll help the league be more competitive in general. The great defenses will be held in check a little better and my QB Mike Boss won't be getting his jersey as dirty every game.
MP: Alright, I can see the logic there. Is there anything else you want to say?
BM: Um, I guess just thanks for the opportunity to stay in the league while playing something more interesting than a lineman. I'll still be able to help my team, and I like that. Thanks for the interview, I hope to get a little more active in and around the NSFL!
Code:
1040Graders please give 80% payout to my boy @BradtheMadLad, he was nice enough to let me interview him!
*Pistol News Network Interviews Bradley Madlad - timeconsumer - 10-31-2017
Excited to see the big man kick balls.