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+---- Thread: *Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser (/showthread.php?tid=8827)
*Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser - dub - 05-24-2018
Balthazar Crindy, who has returned to the sport he loves after a 29-year deep freeze, and fresh off being a high-second round pick in the S8 NSFL draft, will for the first time take questions from the general public. He has only spoken once since his thawing in an exclusive pre-draft interview.
Good afternoon everyone, thanks for coming. I have prepared a short opening statement then I will take your questions.
I'm thrilled to join the Arizona Outlaws. I was not contacted by all the NSFL's teams, but Arizona reached out with a thorough questionnaire and followup. I'm eager to join their ascension to a future championship, and have already gotten to know my fellow locker room buddies, and missed the fucking DuckHunt duck seven times. How does that even work? I'm not familiar with all this new technology yet.
I'm so excited to join an offense that will feature @ADwyer87 and @Durden, and with the veteran experience of Bronko, I'm eager to bring the Tight End position back to prominence in the Outlaws offense.
With that, I'll take your questions.
(05-24-2018, 08:05 PM)ExemplaryChad Wrote:What do you have to say to the teams who didn't draft you?
Aw, nothing like that. Plenty of time later to build animus against other teams, especially division rivals.
(05-24-2018, 08:05 PM)ExemplaryChad Wrote:What would you say your game is most focused on? Do you prefer catching touchdowns or blowing guys up in the run game?
That's like asking a parent to choose between two kids. Can't I love both?
(05-24-2018, 08:05 PM)ExemplaryChad Wrote:What has surprised you most about the new millennium?
I tell you whut. In the 1980s, we told our kids, don't talk to strangers, don't get in their cars, even if they have candy. Now we use the intarwebs to get into strangers' cars, where they give us candy.
(05-24-2018, 08:05 PM)ExemplaryChad Wrote:What do you think about being on a rebuilding team? How long do you think you can stick it out if the wins don't start coming?
Dude. I'M IN THE DESERT. What's a more perfect place for a dude that was frozen for a few decades?
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:Who’s a NSFL player that you like to compare yourself to?
Former Arizona Great Joseph Tkachuk. Never met him, hell, I'm older than him, but his S3 stats: 69 rec, 452 yds, 23 pancakes, 0 sacks allowed. That's my game.
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:Who’s an IRL NFL player you’d compare Crindy too?
Jason Witten
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:Looking at your fellow draftees, are you surprised by where any of them went in the draft?
I thought that my Tijuana bro Viggo Squanch would go much higher. I'm thrilled I'm his teammate now. We're ascending.
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:Are you surprised at where you went in the draft?
Not really, I knew my last update didn't get in so my TPE looked much lower than it should have. I'm at 111 TPE but showed much less than that. The teams that didn't dig very much were probably fooled by that. Their loss.
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:How are you going to determine success this season personally? What are your benchmarks you want to make?
This season? I want to grow, survive, learn. I'm not going to make big promises. But before long, I hope to be a multi-TD, zero-sack TE.
(05-24-2018, 08:09 PM)Roly Wrote:How did you like your DSFL experience? Any improvements you’d recommend? Words of wisdom for current DSFL draftees and prospects?
It was a bit of a blur because I joined midway into a season. I was swimming in information, missing out on a lot of TPE probably. I answered a similar question on that topic here. We've got to a better job at getting rookies up to speed on all this stuff. A one-stop shop of everything that needs to be done, how often, and how.
(05-24-2018, 08:58 PM)ItsJustBarry Wrote:Do you think your teams road trips to Yellowknife will jog your memory of the frozen days? If so,would that be more euphoric or nightmarish?
Here's the thing. I don't remember being that cold during, obviously. Only when I came out. If there was anything I have in my head during my frozen days, it's just... numbers. Like numbers like just monotone. It's weird, like something from my childhood. That's all.
Anyway, I'm sure the road trips in the cold will be fine. I'm still a Louisiana boy, so I'm sure I'll have to adjust just like anyone who isn't used to being in a frozen armpit.
(05-24-2018, 08:58 PM)ItsJustBarry Wrote:When people ask how old you are, do you count those 29 years?
Nope. Those years were taken from me. I don't have em anymore.
(05-24-2018, 08:58 PM)ItsJustBarry Wrote:Between you and Viggo Squanch, who will make a bigger impact on this coming season for Arizona?
Ah man, I gotta say Viggo. I might start right away, but have you seen how good he is? No way he should have fallen out of the second round.
(05-24-2018, 08:58 PM)ItsJustBarry Wrote:Which one of you is taking home the sweet ROTY trophy?
Viggo, no doubt.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:You already touched on this a little, but what's it like going to a team where you'll be catching passes from one of the best quarterbacks to play the game?
What a thrill man. Couldn't have picked a better QB to learn from. So much veteran wisdom, I hope we play together for many years.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:Just three picks before you were drafted, the Arizona Outlaws had drafted another receiver, and a teammate of yours in Tijuana, Viggo Squanch (granted, a wide receiver, not a tight end like yourself). You two won't be competing directly at your respective positions, but I imagine there will be some friendly competition going on?
Naw man, Viggo and I were teammates in Tijuana, now teammates in the desert? Love it.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:You performed well in the Developmental Simulation Football League for the Tijuana Luchadores, but as you were a late season waiver pick-up, you didn't see the same volume of snaps a lot of the other players in your draft class saw. What will the transition to becoming a full-season starter be like?
I've been waiting half a century for this. It's been 51 years, about time I started! haha
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:Does your jersey number (#85) hold any special significance for you, or did you pick it out of a hat?
That's one of those numbers man, eight five, ocho cinco... like I can hear them in my sleep.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:In the past you've mentioned a goal of being a "Jason Witten", all around reliable type of tight end. This is a bit different from many of the National Simulation Football League's big name receiving tight ends like Paul DiMirio, and the pseudo-tight ends who played a mix of tight end and outside wide receiver in college, and continue that in the professionals (for example, your new teammate Fresh Booter). Do you see yourself as someone who could revolutionize the usage of the tight end position in the NSFL?
Revolutionize, or bring it back to the old school? Used to be, you couldn't field an offense without two or three ends like me. Now I go to a team that didn't even have a true tight end on the team? Time to start over, bring it back, get some Reagan-era policy in the league! But you know, without all the racism.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:You're in outstanding physical shape for someone who spent decades frozen. Could you us a brief look into your daily training regimen?
A Rockstar Lemonade for breakfast. A pound of bacon. In honor of George Bush (the first one, not that asshat you guys let take office while I was on ice), I storm through desert, kick up a bunch of dirt and spit, but then I turn right back around before I get too far in. Leave some desert to storm the next day, you know? Then I treat myself to a box of mike n ikes, and a pork roast that I had roasting for the past 24 hours in a slow cooker. Then I put a new pork roast, and fall asleep playing on my Atari 2600.
(05-24-2018, 08:22 PM)run_CMC Wrote:Speaking of it, you've missed -- or perhaps, "skipped" is a better word? -- several decades of development in technology, culture, international relations... I mean, you weren't around for the end of the Cold War, the invention of the smart phone, multiple presidential terms... What was the culture shock like when you were unfrozen?
I'm actually investing in a startup to bring pulse dialing back to cell phones. It's called "Doots and Poots". Coming soon to a smartphone near you. Gotta love the classics. I had a girlfriend once who had a bunch of 0's and 9's in her phone number. Took FOREVER to call her. Those were the days!
*Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser - ExemplaryChad - 05-24-2018
What do you have to say to the teams who didn't draft you?
What would you say your game is most focused on? Do you prefer catching touchdowns or blowing guys up in the run game?
What has surprised you most about the new millennium?
What do you think about being on a rebuilding team? How long do you think you can stick it out if the wins don't start coming?
*Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser - Roly - 05-24-2018
Who’s a NSFL player that you like to compare yourself to?
Who’s an IRL NFL player you’d compare Crindy too?
Looking at your fellow draftees, are you surprised by where any of them went in the draft?
Are you surprised at where you went in the draft?
How are you going to determine success this season personally? What are your benchmarks you want to make?
How did you like your DSFL experience? Any improvements you’d recommend? Words of wisdom for current DSFL draftees and prospects?
*Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser - run_CMC - 05-24-2018
You already touched on this a little, but what's it like going to a team where you'll be catching passes from one of the best quarterbacks to play the game?
Just three picks before you were drafted, the Arizona Outlaws had drafted another receiver, and a teammate of yours in Tijuana, Viggo Squanch (granted, a wide receiver, not a tight end like yourself). You two won't be competing directly at your respective positions, but I imagine there will be some friendly competition going on?
You performed well in the Developmental Simulation Football League for the Tijuana Luchadores, but as you were a late season waiver pick-up, you didn't see the same volume of snaps a lot of the other players in your draft class saw. What will the transition to becoming a full-season starter be like?
Does your jersey number (#85) hold any special significance for you, or did you pick it out of a hat?
In the past you've mentioned a goal of being a "Jason Witten", all around reliable type of tight end. This is a bit different from many of the National Simulation Football League's big name receiving tight ends like Paul DiMirio, and the pseudo-tight ends who played a mix of tight end and outside wide receiver in college, and continue that in the professionals (for example, your new teammate Fresh Booter). Do you see yourself as someone who could revolutionize the usage of the tight end position in the NSFL?
You're in outstanding physical shape for someone who spent decades frozen. Could you us a brief look into your daily training regimen?
Speaking of it, you've missed -- or perhaps, "skipped" is a better word? -- several decades of development in technology, culture, international relations... I mean, you weren't around for the end of the Cold War, the invention of the smart phone, multiple presidential terms... What was the culture shock like when you were unfrozen?
*Balthazar Crindy post-Draft Presser - ItsJustBarry - 05-24-2018
Do you think your teams road trips to Yellowknife will jog your memory of the frozen days? If so,would that be more euphoric or nightmarish?
When people ask how old you are, do you count those 29 years?
Between you and Viggo Squanch, who will make a bigger impact on this coming season for Arizona?
Which one of you is taking home the sweet ROTY trophy?