A Football Ballad
By: The Spider
Authors Note: Many people have PM'd me asking why Mr. Clegane was not drafted. This story is the best summary of the actual events, written organized chronologically. Before this story begins, I am reminded of the infamous Herodotus quote. "I am bound to tell what I am told, but not in every case should you believe it."
First-round potential talent grown in Casterly Rock, Gregor Clegane became contaminated just weeks before the NSFL draft when his name was linked to a suspected homicide and defacement in his ancestral home of Clegane Keep, Casterly Rock. The inside story of how his agent, Tyrion Lannister, tried and likely failed to salvage his draft stock, staring a Night's Watch lifetime appointment as an Officer, and the winding journey that put him across the table from King's Landing Detectives and Grapehead. (Orange County Otter's general manager)
Sandy Clegane, nine at the time of the incident, related "like a brother" to Greg, investigators suspect had been thrust into a lit fireplace by a suspected Northman Agent who climbed up the tower walls to frame the believed first round talent, and reportedly favorite of the current ruling lord, Lord Tywin Lannister.
“This is on me,” Gregor Clegane said, speaking to his assembled house members, according to a person who was in the hearth room. “I had nothing to do with this. I had nothing to do with this, but it’s affecting everyone here. I just feel bad that we are all not going to be able to live our dream at the draft.”
This was an especially emotional time for Greg as he packed his armor, steed bardings, lance, spare lance, sword, shield, axe, and letter opener (short sword) or when the prized cavalry man from Clegane boarded a black stallion the night before the draft, virtually undraftable even though King's Landing Detectives had indicated that he wasn’t a suspect. Fast forward to May sixth, four days after the draft’s conclusion. His 6 foot 5 inch, 350 pound frame is parked on a couch in the Orange County Otter's general manager's mansion, and Clegane is listening to Cliff Hamilton, Otter's General, and current members of the Otters’ Cavalry and coaches make their pitches. Grapehead talks about persevering through hard times, and how fighting through them molds you as a man. One-by-one, the players assure Gregor and his grandfather, the founder of house Clegane, also named Clegane, that Grapehead will have his back. Dinner server at the Grapehead mansion, consisting of shrimp, a massive cut of steak, and sprinkled boulders of football conversation. “For the first time,” he tells his agent Tyrion Lannister, “I really felt like somebody had seen me for who I am.” Who, exactly, is Greg Clegane? For two weeks, that was the most burning question in the NSFL.
Friday, April 24
Around Three hours past sundown
Sandor Clegane is thrust into a fireplace inside his tower room inside Clegane Keep, Casterly Rock. He is approximately nine years old, and his life is saved by a passing Maestor. It is told in the keep that a half dozen servants were required to pull off the assailant from Sandors form over the fireplace. Kings Landing detectives scour the home, the neighborhood and social media for leads. The local gossip list hotspot, a column where scandalous unverified postings are done by a suspected nearby shopkeeper known as Craig, reports Greg as a prime suspect. Craig's List has offered the inconclusive evidence Sandor was playing with a wooden toy Greg has discarded. Investigators will later say they believe Sandor knew the person who burned him, and that his refusal to lend the toy was met with a fiery facial, almost to the death. Night's Watch membership is not out of the question for Greg at this point. According to Greg Clegane, his name was mentioned by Sandor’s ten-year-old playmate during an interview with King's Landing detectives. (The detectives have declined to confirm or deny this detail.) Gerg, twenty, says he had a very brief relationship with Sandor, and that he suspected the toy he was currently engaged with might be his. Greg says he exchanged terse messages with him, in March, about taking a lie detector test to determine who the toy in question actually belonged to.
Monday, April 27
Player agent Tyrion Lannister of the Oldtown-based Priority Sports and Entertainment learns of the situation from Clegane—he says he was reached by the Night's Watch on Monday*—and takes the news to agency partner and general counsel Littlefinger. “At the time, we weren’t clear on how big an issue it would be,” Littlefinger says. “Unfortunately, a child lost his face, his looks, and his confidence, but we believed the incident had nothing to do with Gregor. Still, I wanted to make my partners aware.” The agency hires a criminal attorney in Casterly Rock, Jim Bonanzo.
Tuesday, April 28
In the morning, Tyrion Lannister composes a text message to NSFL team reps: Hey, there’s a story that may or may not come out. It’s an unfortunate incident, and Greg had nothing to do with it, but a young man lost his face and he had a relationship with him. Around the same time, speculation is growing rampant via Craig's List and throughout the Casterly Rock community. Gregor's name has been mentioned on list in connection with the investigation, and a local crier organization contacts King's Landing Detective headquarters corporal and spokesman Don Coppola, who confirms that investigators are interested in questioning Clegane. “We weren’t going to lie to them,” Coppola would later say. “He was just someone who had some type of knowledge of Sandor Clegane, so we wanted to speak with him to help locate the burner or burners.” The news becomes a kingdom story, with cryer's shouting headlines blaring some version of: King's Landing Detectives wish to speak with first-round NSFL prospect concerning homicide and defacement of young child. “When ESPN got a hold of it,” Tyrion Lannister says, “that’s when we were like, ‘Uh-oh.’ ”
Wednesday, April 29
For the first time, Priority Sports’ three football agents meet in the same room, in their posh loft office near the rolling banks of the Casterly Rock gold mines. Gregor had galloped in the night before to prepare for the draft, and tomorrow he believed he would walk across the stage and shake the commissioner’s hand as a first-round pick. Neither he nor his family members believe anything would derail those plans. But Clegane is pulled early from a morning NSFL Play sixty event to meet with agents Tyrion Lannister, Littlefinger and Mike McCartney. “We made the decision that we needed to pull him out of the draft festivities,” Littlefinger says, “and put him on a plane back to Casterly Rock to meet with our Maestors and our private detectives to accelerate a meeting with the night's watch.” The agents sit Clegane in a conference room overlooking the river and tell him, “You’ve got to go home.” The ensuing conversation lasts two hours, with Greg in tears professing his innocence, and then begging not to interrupt his family’s experience at the draft.
Photos of the trial:
http://i.imgur.com/B5Is267.png
http://i.imgur.com/OL3PIRe.png
“He sat in that chair and poured his heart out and said, ‘I did not do this,’ ” McCartney says.
“He was extremely upset,” Littlefinger says. “He knew the severity of the situation in Casterly Rock, but he didn’t understand how it would affect the football side. He said, ‘Am I even going to be drafted? I want to be here, this is my dream, to walk across that stage. I had nothing to do with this. Why do I have to go home?’ ” Clegane had been projected as a top 15 pick in the 2017 draft but remained at Clegane Keep for his senior year apprenticeship, hoping another year of refinement would make him one of the nation’s top Cavalrymen. But it didn’t matter now. In the eyes of NSFL teams, his name was connected to a Homicide investigation. Late in the morning, Clegane and Tyrion Lannister take a car back to the hotel. Around noon, Clegane speaks to his mom, siblings, grandmother, girlfriend, her father and others about the change in plans. “It was a very difficult feeling, because they’re all there for Greg,” Tyrion Lannister says. “These people are not rich, but they bought these outfits to go on the gold carpet. There was an argument. I said, ‘Listen, we don’t understand why certain things happen, but we have to trust the Seven Faced God. We have to trust that he has a plan.’ ” Littlefinger and McCartney had never met Clegane before today, but they arrive at the same conclusion: Greg is telling the truth. Back at the office, they begin an effort to clear his name, dividing the league into two lists and each calling three general managers. Says Littlefinger: “When you looked in this kid’s eyes, heard the story, talked to the lawyer, talked to our private investigator, we all believed he was innocent and we felt that we needed to put our reputations on the line for him.” On the legal front, according to his agents, Cleganes’ offer to meet with detectives on Thursday is turned down.
Thursday, April 30
Round 1 of the NSFL draft
In Casterly Rock, Clegane passes a lie detector test administered by the agency-hired private investigator. The goal is not to convince detective, but to persuade wary NSFL executives.
Cleganes’ camp and detective then negotiate a meeting time. Friday isn’t an option, because Cleganes’ lawyer must attend to a case in Oldtown. The Night's Watch, the Clegane camp says, aren’t available over the weekend.* They settle on Monday. Back in King's Landing, it’s clear that Cleganes’ draft stock is plummeting; he’s losing hundreds of thousands of dollars by the hour. His representatives brainstorm their options and settle on a far-fetched plan. They want to see if Clegane can gain admission into the NSFL’s supplemental draft, a summertime event typically reserved for players who aren’t eligible in the spring. The language in the 2011 CBA is clear on this matter—“no player may elect to bypass a draft for which he is eligible to apply for selection in a supplemental draft”—but Littlefinger calls league counsel Jeff Pashtun in the morning and makes a formal request. In the afternoon, Troy Vincenzo, the league’s executive vice president of football operations, calls back to deliver the news: No precedent will be set today.
“We knew it was a Hail Mary,” McCartney says. Meanwhile, the agents had set up a conference call four hours after mid day—three hours before the draft is set to begin—to connect representatives from NSFL teams with Clegane’s Maester in Clegane Keep. Two teams are on the line (two general managers and a bunch of security heads) and ask dozens of questions. Some approach the matter with blank slates, while others seem to bring assumptions of criminality. The secure call is tightly managed, with coded entry numbers for each participant. Clegane is not among the 32 players selected on the first day of the draft.
Friday, May 1
Rounds 2 and 3 of the NSFL draft
Sandor's ten year old playmate dies at the hospice tent in Casterly Rock. His death is ruled a Homicide. It is not yet known if Clegane is related to the boy; a paternity test is scheduled for Monday. “We were always conscious of this incredible tragedy, the fact that a boy and eventually his childhood friend lost his live and face,” Littlefinger says. “At the same time, we had a responsibility to our client.” In the eyes of NSFL teams, Gregor was now connected to a homicide. “It became clear that we had to prove Greg was 100% innocent for anybody to draft him high,” McCartney says. One team rep tells McCartney they’re considering drafting Clegane in the fifth round. “I’m thinking, That’s the worst thing for us,” McCartney says. “I ran the numbers. If a guy is drafted, he signs a four-year deal. If he gets a three-year undrafted-free-agent contract, plays well and often, then gets the first-round tender and the player participation pool bonus money, he could be paid better than the 33rd pick in the draft.” Rather than lobby for Clegane to be drafted, his agents issue an ultimatum: Draft Greg in the second or third rounds, or don’t draft him at all. But are they bluffing? Clegane, of course, would have to stay healthy for the earnings to kick in during Year four as a UDFA, but he would likely have his pick of where he’d play and optimize his chances of contributing early in his career. In Casterly Rock, Clegane sweats out the second day of the draft while his agents unfurl a new plan. Rather than lobby for him to be drafted, they issue an ultimatum to teams: Draft Greg in the second or third rounds, or don’t draft him at all. The hardest part, Tyrion Lannister says, was selling Clegane on the idea: “I’m explaining it to this young man and he’s having a hard time accepting it. We’re trying not to get drafted? He had to have a lot of trust in us.” They show him salary charts and he agrees; it’s worth the risk. The media, including this reporter, openly question the competence of Clegane’s agents. Even a rival agent reaches out to Greg in an apparent attempt to poach him from his seemingly befuddled representatives. Some teams express contempt for Clegane’ bold move. Others call his agents to gauge their position. Are they bluffing? Six teams tell the agency they’re going to draft him on Saturday, the third day of the draft. “If you draft him, he’s going into next year’s draft,” McCartney tells them. Was it a bluff? “We can put it on the record now: We were never going back in the draft,” Littlefinger says of waiting for the 2018 draft. “If someone had drafted him, we would’ve had a long, long discussion about it, but at the end of the day you can’t go back in the draft. He could get injured, gain weight, or ten great Cavalrymen could come out. Too many risks.” After three rounds, Clegane remains undrafted.
Saturday, May 2
Rounds 4-7 of the NSFL draft
The backend of the draft slowly melts away like a stick of butter at room temperature. Clegane, his family members and his agents hold their breath, hoping no team takes a flyer. The seventh and final round sees a run on Cavalrymen: Jake Rodgers from House Tarth, Bobby Hart of House Stark and Austin Shepherd from House Arryn are selected in a span of four picks. “When we got to the last ten picks I don’t think I’ve ever been so anxious in a draft,” McCartney says. “We were praying he didn’t get picked.” Before making its seventh-round selection, one team sends Littlefinger one last text message. “There was a team that had drafted four Cavalrymen,” Littlefinger says, “and they said, ‘We’re taking him.’ And I texted back, ‘You’re going to embarrass yourself. You’re going to waste this pick.’ “And they passed. And now he’s a UDFA.”
Sunday, May 3
Deep breath. Relax.
Monday, May 4
It’s interview day for Clegane and detectives from the Casterly Rock detective department. He arrives with Bonanzo, his lawyer, and voluntarily provides his cell phone (to prove his whereabouts). The meeting lasts for more than an hour. Clegane also takes a paternity test and is told the expedited results will be available later in the week. Hoping to get in on the ground floor of the free-agent negotiations, three teams contact Clegane or his agents. Bills coach Rex Ryan even flies in to have dinner with Greg in Casterly Rock. The sports agency examines its options, trying to find the right scenario for Clegane to enter the NSFL. The meeting with detectives lasts for more than an hour. Clegane also takes a paternity test and is told the expedited results will be available later in the week. “We felt it would be important for a place that had stability at QB, coach, Cavalry coach,” McCartney says. “Not for one year, but the next few years. We wanted a QB that spits the ball out quickly, because we all see QBs who hold onto the ball, take sacks, and then you go blame the young blocker.” Clegane and his camp had envisioned detective's holding a press conference to clear his name, but they realize there will be no public pardon for someone who was never a suspect. That resolution, they concede, may only happen if another person is arrested. An evening headline on the King's Landing Times website reports: “Greg Clegane not a suspect, but not cleared.”
Tuesday, May 5
Clegane’ agents eliminate two teams from contention and give briefings to the remaining suitors. The contract would be non-negotiable. Clegane would get a guaranteed contract with no offsets, second- and third-year maximum salaries for a UDFA, and the remainder of Team X’s signing bonus cash pool. If he were ever charged or indicted in the murder investigation, the guarantees would disappear and the contract would be torn up. The agents narrow the list to a handful of teams, and then Clegane cuts it down even more. He wants to be close to home, and he doesn’t want to be anywhere cold. He books a trip to Oldtown.
Wednesday, May 6
Clegane is not related. The news sets off a different kind of frenzy. In the eyes of NSFL teams, it is now more probable than not that Clegane had nothing to do with the murder of Sandor's Playmate's death and his defacing. At the time of publication, detectives in Casterly Rock had not made an arrest or identified a suspect. Tyrion Lannister's and Clegane's pigeons won't stop buzzing. There are typically no recruitment visits for UDFAs; you go to a team with the intention of signing. Still, Clegane has a contingency plan. He’ll to go Silver Harbor if Oldtown doesn’t feel right. Accompanied by his grandfather, also named Clegane, and his agent, Tyrion Lannister, Greg arrives at Grapehead’s mansion and is greeted by a welcoming party of Otters bigwigs, coaches and players. “The house was as gorgeous as you can imagine,” Tyrion Lannister says. “Mr. Head just sat there and talked. He talked about his background and where he came from, how he’d been through hard times, and how he became the man he was. It was chilling. He said, ‘You go through hard times, and that’s what makes you what you are.’ “He talked about how the media and the world can call for your head, like when he fired Tytos Lannister, but he made the changes necessary and believed in his people.” Grapehead and Clegane talk into the night, and Clegane understands that he’ll have the chance to start immediately if he can beat out ho-hum left guard Ronald Leary. Clegane decides to sleep on it before making a final decision.
Thursday, May 7
The Otter’s chief operating officer, a Otters’ executive vice president, Grapehead arrives at Clegane’ hotel to make one final pitch. Later in the morning, Clegane tells his mother and agent, “There’s no other place I need to be. I believe that in my heart.” He signs a three-year, fully guaranteed deal worth $1.7 million gold, not counting the possibilities of a high tender or performance bonuses. Still, Clegane has lost nearly $15 million gold because of a murder and burning case in which he hasn’t been deemed a suspect or a person of interest.
At his introductory press conference, he wears a Orange Otters polo and a Orange Otters fitted hat, and he takes more than a few deeps sighs of relief. “I can’t even find the words to describe it,” he says. “I believe that the Seven Faced God has a plan for everything, and I believe that his plan for me was different. Never before has this ever happened. “And I’m here. I’m a part of something great.”
* Story has been updated to reflect sourcing. The Casterly Rock Detective Department has disputed certain assertions about when detectives were available to talk to Clegane. At the time of publication the department did not respond to a request for clarification on these points.
*Word count should be around 3,400*
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