Good morning everyone. I'm going to make this nice and short, probably around 300 words short, because we all know why I'm here so lets just get to the point. I decided to continue my football career in this league for one reason and one reason only: because quarterbacks are little bitches and I want to sack them. I want to rush the line, blow past what measly offensive linemen is put against me, and hit that goddamn quarterback with all I've got. Now I've been training to do this my entire life. Peewee football, high school football, college football. I know what needs to be done to compete at the highest level. Im here now, and Im ready. Sometime in the near future, you'll hear my name announced during the NSFL draft and it wont be any surprise when its in the first round. I feel bad for the teams and skip me, as it may turn out they'll be switching to their backup quarterback pretty early into the season as I knock each one of their heads off week by week. None of these teams scare me. I even feel bad for whoever gets lucky enough to be my own quarterback, because sure he doesnt have to play against me, but I get to face him in practice and dont let yourself think for one minute that wearing that red jersey is going to stop me from hitting you. In reality, you're still a quarterback, and Maxwell Beard his quarterbacks. Anyway, my time with you all is quickly approaching the minumum required and you should know I dont want to have to spend any more time here than I have too. That being said, good luck to all and I'll see you at the draft.
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