03-13-2023, 03:03 AM
(This post was last modified: 03-15-2023, 08:39 AM by Caleb_H. Edited 6 times in total.)
(Using my first gen 2x)
Warning: Butthurt Feelings may result from reading. Consult a physician if serious.
1. Bondi Beach Buccaneers
After a rough couple of seasons, the Bondi Beach Buccaneers have entered this season hitting the ground running with a league leading 5-2 record and 85 point differential. After starting the season 0-2 with both losses being within one score, they have won the last five games since all in convincing fashion. Their offense has been clicking at an incredibly high level with a league leading average of 34.7 Points per game. Smokin Jay has been the engine powering this offense with his incredibly efficient play throughout the season boasting a 21-1 touchdown to interception ratio. On the defensive side of the ball, they have also put up impressive numbers holding opposing teams to only 22.6 PPG, which is second in the league despite being middle of the pack in terms of yardage. Props to both DJ Maclean and Myrtle Beach Tolliver for locking down the center of the field at the linebacker position with them combining for 80 tackles, 8 PDs, and 4 sacks.
2. Tijuana Luchadores
The Tijuana Luchadores have arguably been the most unpredictable team from week to week, but they have continued to weather the storm and fight their way to a 4-3 record. One week, you will find them blowing out teams like the Dallas Birddogs 45-10 or the Kansas City Coyotes 42-14, and then on another week you will find them laying a giant, plopping egg like losses to the Seawolves 40-17 or the Grey Ducks 21-10. This unpredictability makes one wonder if this team is built to win down the line this year. Nevertheless, the stats do not lie and paint the picture of a promising team boasting the best defense in the league, which is holding opposing teams to a phenomenal 22.3 PPG. Jayden Alexander has been a tackle machine with 43 while Synyster Gates has impressed with 37 tackles and 10 PDs. The Luchadores have also put up more than respectable numbers on the offensive side of the ball with the third in the league average of 27.3 PPG. Rookie Lloyd Bannings has been the charismatic face of the franchise this season putting up 1576 yards and a 17-5 touchdown to interception ratio. Only time will reveal what this team truly is, but the initial results are promising.
3. Portland Pythons
As much as it would fill me with child-like glee to put the Portland Pythons at number 1 and every other team at 8, the 1-3 start to the season and my INCREDIBLE restraint pushes the Portland Pythons down to third. After the slow 1-3 start with 2 of 3 being within one score, the Pythons have slithered their way back to the top of their conference with a three win streak. The Pythons' season so far is a tale of two with the first half of the season mainly comprised of offensive shootouts while the second half showed the defense coming into their own holding opposing teams to 19, 10, and 13 in the last three games. They currently hold the second best offense in the DSFL averaging a lean 28 PPG with a potent rushing attack averaging a league leading 147.3 YPG. Donovan Winters III has also held his own serving as an efficient game manager at the helm of the rushing attack throwing 16 TDS with a 2-1 touchdown to interception ratio and throwing 1830 yards per game. On the other side of the field, the Pythons boast by a wide margin the most dominant run defense in the league only allowing a stingy 79.1 rushing yards per game while leading in both tackles for loss with 25 and sacks with 31. You can thank Bruce White and Leo Stud who crowd the top of the sack leaderboard accounting for more than half of the sacks for the team. Despite the struggles of the secondary at the beginning of the season shown by currently ranking seventh in the league, the results have been promising the last three games only allowing 221.6 yards per game through the air and should only expect to improve with the addition of safety Mr. Robb to fill the gaping hole in the secondary that plagued them.
4. London Royals
The London Royals are easily the weirdest team on this list to assess. They have done nothing but whelm other teams in the league. Everything about them is middle of the pack. Despite their negative point differential of -15, they have put up a solid 4-3 record hot on the heels of the Pythons for the Northern conference. The biggest concern about this team is not that they have any major problems in their production, it is that they are not particularly impressive in any fashion either. In almost every metric, they float around average, which has been serviceable to this point. They average a reasonable (albeit slightly below average) 24.7 points per game on offense while holding teams to a tame 27 points per game on defense. If this team continues to improve all around down the stretch, they could grow into possibly one of the most dangerous teams in the league with few weakness, but if they continue their current trajectory, it would be hard to believe that they will compete against the more dominant teams in the league. Despite all this, a special shoutout is deserved Lord Farquaads for his impressive season so far currently holding the throne of rushing leader at 678 yards, 3.9 yards per carry, and 7 touchdowns.
5. Norfolk Seawolves
The Norfolk Seawolves were another team that came out swinging right out of the gate starting 3-0 with two of them being complete blowouts putting up crazy numbers that made them look like the possibly the best team in the league. Since then, they have struggled to find consistency on both sides of the ball. In the first three wins of the season, they averaged a stellar 38.3 points per game while only allowing an immaculate 20.3 points per game. Since then, they have averaged only a ghastly 18 points per game on offense while allowing an unthinkable 35 points per game. If the Seawolves do not start stringing some wins together soon, it may be time to start ringing the alarm bell as their shutdown secondary is the main bright spot on this team with a league best 231.6 yards allowed per game. Outside of their first three wins, the Seawolves have unfortunately not played like a playoff team and need to win now if they wish to stay on the upper half of the power rankings.
6. Kansas City Coyotes
Despite their lackluster record and low expectations because of their former dominance, the Kansas City Coyotes have actually played better than their record suggests and have put up better numbers than many have anticipated. Their -1 point differential despite their 2-5 record helps paint a picture of what they are. Based off the numbers, they are a fairly solid team that can not quite put teams away. Their two wins were blowout wins against Portland 37-7 and and Norfolk 41-14 while most of their losses were within 1-2 scores. This ultimately places their offense at an average 25.1 points per game on offense and a third best in the league 25.3 points allowed on defense. At their 2-5 record, the Coyotes are currently at a crossroads; they can realize their potential and start to put some wins together finally looking like the team that they are on the cusp of being, or they can bottom out for a hard rebuild looking towards the future.
7. Dallas Birddogs
The Dallas Birddogs are perhaps the only team in the league in the lower half of the rankings to play worse than their record so far this season. It seems like a blessing to be sitting at 3-4 despite having a -46 point differential. Outside of their win against Minnesota 37-14, their wins have been close while their losses for the most part have not with only one being within one score. In spite of the hardship these team has endured already this season, they are still in a position to contend with the other teams in their conference. Will that happen? Probably not. The Dallas Birddogs currently have the worst defense in the league with an average of a putrid 31.3 points per game despite having a fairly stout run defense. On the other side of the ball, the Birddogs do not improve much with the second worst offense in the league averaging 24.7 points per game. I am sorry, but someone please explain to me how this team beat the buccaneers lighting the scoreboard up with 41 points.
8. Minnesota Grey Ducks
The Minnesota Grey Ducks are essentially the Ying to the Dallas Birddogs' Yang as their offensive and defensive stats are essentially flipped. Unlike the two teams above, the Grey Ducks absolutely deserve their record and have played accordingly. Surprisingly, outside of their embarrassing loss to the Buccaneers 59-10, only one of their losses was by more than one score. That being said, the Grey Ducks have done little to impress this season with poor stats all across the board. They have the worst offense in the league averaging a downright horrible 21.6 points per game and 397.1, which means they have been putting up a lot of yards that simply turn into nothing. The defense has not shown much life either placing seventh in the league at an unspeakable 29.7 points per game. Unfortunately, the Grey Ducks are tied for the worst record in the league and have absolutely played like it.
Warning: Butthurt Feelings may result from reading. Consult a physician if serious.
1. Bondi Beach Buccaneers
After a rough couple of seasons, the Bondi Beach Buccaneers have entered this season hitting the ground running with a league leading 5-2 record and 85 point differential. After starting the season 0-2 with both losses being within one score, they have won the last five games since all in convincing fashion. Their offense has been clicking at an incredibly high level with a league leading average of 34.7 Points per game. Smokin Jay has been the engine powering this offense with his incredibly efficient play throughout the season boasting a 21-1 touchdown to interception ratio. On the defensive side of the ball, they have also put up impressive numbers holding opposing teams to only 22.6 PPG, which is second in the league despite being middle of the pack in terms of yardage. Props to both DJ Maclean and Myrtle Beach Tolliver for locking down the center of the field at the linebacker position with them combining for 80 tackles, 8 PDs, and 4 sacks.
2. Tijuana Luchadores
The Tijuana Luchadores have arguably been the most unpredictable team from week to week, but they have continued to weather the storm and fight their way to a 4-3 record. One week, you will find them blowing out teams like the Dallas Birddogs 45-10 or the Kansas City Coyotes 42-14, and then on another week you will find them laying a giant, plopping egg like losses to the Seawolves 40-17 or the Grey Ducks 21-10. This unpredictability makes one wonder if this team is built to win down the line this year. Nevertheless, the stats do not lie and paint the picture of a promising team boasting the best defense in the league, which is holding opposing teams to a phenomenal 22.3 PPG. Jayden Alexander has been a tackle machine with 43 while Synyster Gates has impressed with 37 tackles and 10 PDs. The Luchadores have also put up more than respectable numbers on the offensive side of the ball with the third in the league average of 27.3 PPG. Rookie Lloyd Bannings has been the charismatic face of the franchise this season putting up 1576 yards and a 17-5 touchdown to interception ratio. Only time will reveal what this team truly is, but the initial results are promising.
3. Portland Pythons
As much as it would fill me with child-like glee to put the Portland Pythons at number 1 and every other team at 8, the 1-3 start to the season and my INCREDIBLE restraint pushes the Portland Pythons down to third. After the slow 1-3 start with 2 of 3 being within one score, the Pythons have slithered their way back to the top of their conference with a three win streak. The Pythons' season so far is a tale of two with the first half of the season mainly comprised of offensive shootouts while the second half showed the defense coming into their own holding opposing teams to 19, 10, and 13 in the last three games. They currently hold the second best offense in the DSFL averaging a lean 28 PPG with a potent rushing attack averaging a league leading 147.3 YPG. Donovan Winters III has also held his own serving as an efficient game manager at the helm of the rushing attack throwing 16 TDS with a 2-1 touchdown to interception ratio and throwing 1830 yards per game. On the other side of the field, the Pythons boast by a wide margin the most dominant run defense in the league only allowing a stingy 79.1 rushing yards per game while leading in both tackles for loss with 25 and sacks with 31. You can thank Bruce White and Leo Stud who crowd the top of the sack leaderboard accounting for more than half of the sacks for the team. Despite the struggles of the secondary at the beginning of the season shown by currently ranking seventh in the league, the results have been promising the last three games only allowing 221.6 yards per game through the air and should only expect to improve with the addition of safety Mr. Robb to fill the gaping hole in the secondary that plagued them.
4. London Royals
The London Royals are easily the weirdest team on this list to assess. They have done nothing but whelm other teams in the league. Everything about them is middle of the pack. Despite their negative point differential of -15, they have put up a solid 4-3 record hot on the heels of the Pythons for the Northern conference. The biggest concern about this team is not that they have any major problems in their production, it is that they are not particularly impressive in any fashion either. In almost every metric, they float around average, which has been serviceable to this point. They average a reasonable (albeit slightly below average) 24.7 points per game on offense while holding teams to a tame 27 points per game on defense. If this team continues to improve all around down the stretch, they could grow into possibly one of the most dangerous teams in the league with few weakness, but if they continue their current trajectory, it would be hard to believe that they will compete against the more dominant teams in the league. Despite all this, a special shoutout is deserved Lord Farquaads for his impressive season so far currently holding the throne of rushing leader at 678 yards, 3.9 yards per carry, and 7 touchdowns.
5. Norfolk Seawolves
The Norfolk Seawolves were another team that came out swinging right out of the gate starting 3-0 with two of them being complete blowouts putting up crazy numbers that made them look like the possibly the best team in the league. Since then, they have struggled to find consistency on both sides of the ball. In the first three wins of the season, they averaged a stellar 38.3 points per game while only allowing an immaculate 20.3 points per game. Since then, they have averaged only a ghastly 18 points per game on offense while allowing an unthinkable 35 points per game. If the Seawolves do not start stringing some wins together soon, it may be time to start ringing the alarm bell as their shutdown secondary is the main bright spot on this team with a league best 231.6 yards allowed per game. Outside of their first three wins, the Seawolves have unfortunately not played like a playoff team and need to win now if they wish to stay on the upper half of the power rankings.
6. Kansas City Coyotes
Despite their lackluster record and low expectations because of their former dominance, the Kansas City Coyotes have actually played better than their record suggests and have put up better numbers than many have anticipated. Their -1 point differential despite their 2-5 record helps paint a picture of what they are. Based off the numbers, they are a fairly solid team that can not quite put teams away. Their two wins were blowout wins against Portland 37-7 and and Norfolk 41-14 while most of their losses were within 1-2 scores. This ultimately places their offense at an average 25.1 points per game on offense and a third best in the league 25.3 points allowed on defense. At their 2-5 record, the Coyotes are currently at a crossroads; they can realize their potential and start to put some wins together finally looking like the team that they are on the cusp of being, or they can bottom out for a hard rebuild looking towards the future.
7. Dallas Birddogs
The Dallas Birddogs are perhaps the only team in the league in the lower half of the rankings to play worse than their record so far this season. It seems like a blessing to be sitting at 3-4 despite having a -46 point differential. Outside of their win against Minnesota 37-14, their wins have been close while their losses for the most part have not with only one being within one score. In spite of the hardship these team has endured already this season, they are still in a position to contend with the other teams in their conference. Will that happen? Probably not. The Dallas Birddogs currently have the worst defense in the league with an average of a putrid 31.3 points per game despite having a fairly stout run defense. On the other side of the ball, the Birddogs do not improve much with the second worst offense in the league averaging 24.7 points per game. I am sorry, but someone please explain to me how this team beat the buccaneers lighting the scoreboard up with 41 points.
8. Minnesota Grey Ducks
The Minnesota Grey Ducks are essentially the Ying to the Dallas Birddogs' Yang as their offensive and defensive stats are essentially flipped. Unlike the two teams above, the Grey Ducks absolutely deserve their record and have played accordingly. Surprisingly, outside of their embarrassing loss to the Buccaneers 59-10, only one of their losses was by more than one score. That being said, the Grey Ducks have done little to impress this season with poor stats all across the board. They have the worst offense in the league averaging a downright horrible 21.6 points per game and 397.1, which means they have been putting up a lot of yards that simply turn into nothing. The defense has not shown much life either placing seventh in the league at an unspeakable 29.7 points per game. Unfortunately, the Grey Ducks are tied for the worst record in the league and have absolutely played like it.