Hello my sweet sweet diary. It has been probably over a year now. A lot has a changed. I have done basically just the bare minimum to survive here in the league. I have been busy with more important things in my life that football unfortunately. But it is that time I can hopefully start focusing more on football and get back into the groove of everything. That is what I am getting paid for after all. So I want you to know that it is not all because I am being selfish. I also got pissed off at a fellow member in our football league and that helped me push to the bare minimum realm of where I am at now. So anyway I guess I should write down some life changing stuff in here. The league decided to pay us for our Twitter use so that's pretty cool. I enjoy getting paid to tweet out. One of the easiest pay days I have has in my life. I'm also kind of bored so I'm just going to write and write and write in here. So if I get a little off topic or just go on and on I suggest that you just stop reading now. Cause let us be honest. I do not give a even an ounce of shit about you and I am sure the same could be said about me. See? I told you I would get way off topic and that was pretty quick. Just about to seconds after I said that I did the actions of it. Oh well I guess that is what happens when you have not written in your diary for a while and you are not exactly sure what to write. I have to write a lot. But because I want too not because I have too. But you will find that out soon. I'm actually ready for bed and i have not even gone over my life shit. I guess I will do that another night good night for now and I will get back to you soon.
Thursday June third nineteen forty one.
Today is the day that I tell you all about the new family stuff after my long departure from the league. Well I stopped focusing about half way through last season. Season seven to be exact. It was my second season in the big leagues and I was hungry for a championship. Unfortunately our league is god damn rigged and we lost during the playoff game against the liberty. The liberty would then go on to be defeated against the god damn otters. Four god damn wins in a row. If you were not sick of this league before would you be now? I know I was. I needed a break and my wife knew that. In the off season we flew out to sweden and spent a few months out there. We explored a lot and of course we had roudy sex a lot. And I mean a lot. We would fuck any where we got the chance. In the bathrooms at restaurants on public busses. It was actually pretty fun. So we got back from that and I decided to keep busy. I built a pool in my backyard. Heated of course because Yellowknife is cold as fuck. I cleaned out my garage finally and bought a couple of cars. I got a skyline r-34 gtr imported from Japan. It is a pretty fucking bad ass car. I drive around in that all the time. I also got a 1988 Toyota mr2 that I'm completely rebuilding. It has been a lot of work and that is actually the main reason I have been gone for a while. I have finally finished that little bastard though and now that car is a lot of fun. Man is it quick now. That pool though is no joke either. My God is that son of a bitch a lot of work. I did not hire a pool boy because I thought it would be easy but fuck man this shit sucks a lot. So it's safe to say that next year I am definitely getting a pool boy. Also I am excited to announce that after all that rigours sex me and my wife did it's now coming back to haunt me. She is fucking pregnant again if you can believe that stupid ass shit. We do not know the sex of it yet. We declined to know what it is for now. So that will be our fun little surprise when he or she comes out of my wife's asshole. Just joking of course it is her vag. Anyway, I guess I should get into a little but of football talk her shouldn't I? So I'm on my third season right now and I didn't get through my first season yet. I will be honest I do not remember exactly where I was in my last post and I am not going to go back to re read it so I'll just briefly go over my first season from start to finish and call it a day. So my first season in the football league was season six. So our first game we would play the Philadelphia liberty at home in Yellowknife. Unfortunately we would lose that game thirty three to thirty one. Pretty close to winning but unfortunately pretty close don't get you wins. I went seven for seventy five yards and a touchdown in my first game. Not too shabby. The second game was against the Colorado Yeti at Colorado. We won that game twenty three to nine. A pretty easy victory if I don't say so myself. I went six catches for forty eight yards. The third game was against the Baltimore Hawks in Yellowknife. We won that game thirty four to fourteen. We crushed our bitter rivals and it was nice. I went five for thirty seven that game. At this point we were two and one on the season. The fourth game of the year was against the new Orleans second line. The most stupid fucking name too I'd like to point out. But you'd never guess what happened. We fucking tired that game twenty seven to twenty seven. I went four for sixty six yards that game. After that embarrassing tie to a bad team we faced the orange county otters in Yellowknife and lost. We would lose that game thirty nine to thirteen. Not a very pretty loss. I went one for two that game. Which is pretty unacceptable. Our season record was now two, two and one. The next game was against the San Jose sabercats. We played this one in San Jose. We lost another one. This time it was twenty two to twenty. Another close game we could of won. Making us three two and one on the year. The next was in Yellowknife versus the San Jose sabercats. If you actually read this let me know. Twice in two weeks. But if you could guess it, we lost again. This time it was twenty nine to seventeen. Over these two games I went one catch for five yards and five for sixty six yards. Not my best games ever. But the first was much better. After this game we went four two and one. Up next was orange county otters. We played there in orange county. And we finally broke our losing streak. Winning twenty to seventeen. I went six for fifty three yards and one touchdown. My second of the season. At this point we're one game away from five hundred. At four three and one. The next game was a home game against the arizona outlaws. We would win that game twenty to fourteen. In that game I went three for twelve yards. Back to five hundred. We got to four four and one on the season. Next game was also against the outlaws but this time it was at arizona. We unfortunately lost that game forty one to thirty five. On the season at four five and one. Back on the decline. We played second line next. At new Orleans. We won that game twenty four to twenty. I went a really shitty one for seven that game. The next game we played was against the liberty again. They whooped out asses this game. We lost forty to fourteen. I did two for seventeen. I had a really really awful ending to my year. But we still have a couple of games left to my season! Second to last game we played the yeti. We whooped their ass this game. We beat them sixty six to six. Lots of sixes there, kind of like the devil's number. In this game I only went to three for twenty two. Still not enough. And I could still be doing a lot better. The last game of the season was against the Hawks. This decides who gets in the playoffs. We win we're in. They win, they're in. So who won? Well let's just say it was most definitely us. We beat them forty one to twenty eight. During that game I went two for two. The season ended and the post season was about to start. We would end up going seven six and one. I would go forty eight to four hundred and thirty four with only two touchdowns. An extremely forgettable season. But there's always next year right? Welp this season was over and unfortunately I can't find the stats for post season so I won't be able to go over that. If I remember correctly though, we beat liberty? Maybe? I'm not entirely sure. Maybe we lost to liberty. But anyhow that was a lot of fucking writing wasn't it? I'm not entirely sure what the fuck is going on but I'm tired as fuck so I might go to bed? Good night my sweet sweet little fuck head of a god damn diary. I'm sorry I'm going to bed now. Good night.
Saturday, February sixth eighteen oh two.
I'm just fucking with you diary it's obviously not that date. It's most definitely twenty twenty five. No but deal though right? I love to ramble. It's my absolutely favorite thing to do in the entire world. Well anyway let's get into this new subject of mine. I'll do a little quiz for all the kids here. I'm either A, a hardcore Catholic that thinks if you masterbate you're probably possessed by the devil and you should be killed. Or I'm a satanist that eats baby's. Which one am I? I'm just fucking with you I'm neither of those things. I don't believe in no god damn talking snake or a fucking zombie. I believe in the all mighty Zeus. I'm just kidding again I'm a Christian I just like to joke around. No big deal I hope. But if you're offended go ahead and go to your bathroom and fuck your self because I don't give a fucking shit about you. Fuck I'm really bored tonight diary. What the fuck should I talk about? I don't know anything. Okay okay I know I'm going to get back on track. We're going to take a look at my second season in the Nsfl. We're on season seven now. And I felt from the begging that it would be pretty awesome. And it was, spoiler alert. Okay so let's get things kicked off for this wonderful season seven shall we? So the first game was against the dreadful Colorado Yeti. So here's another spoiler alert, they didn't win a game for two straight years in a row. This season being the second season. Any way I want to do a play by play with me calling the plays again. That was fun and I like it so that's what I'm doing so enjoy! We get the ball first to start the half. We take it down for about a fifty eight yard return. The very first play mat Akselsen gets sacked! For a huge seven yard loss. The next play, the first play on offense was a pass to me. Unfortunately I dropped it. Not a good start. But it's only the first play of the year. Third down and seventeen now and mat drops back to pass he connects with me for a twelve yard catch and it's first down! The very next play Mat Akselsen throws it to Eric Kennedy and it's intercepted! Not a very strong start by our offense. A sack a drop and a interception in just a hand full of plays. Luckily their next three plays consisted of a drop pass, a throw away, and a sack for minus six yards. They would how ever kick a field goal and be up three to nothing early in the first quarter. They would then kick off to us. It's now first down. Three yard rush by our new running back, Robby rainey. The next play in second down is a throw away to avoid a sack, you hate those plays but it's a necessary evil. The next play is a thirty two bomb from Mat Akselsen to Eric Kennedy! A sweet pass and now we are on a roll. A three yard run and a six yard pass play would set up a short third down and one. Unfortunately we would not be able to convert to a first down. We would attempt a forty three yard field goal and non other than the best kicker in the planet, None Forfeit. The kick is up and it is good! The Colorado Yeti would then get the ball back. They would convert one first down and then we of course get a penalty. It's now first and five. A thirteen yard rush and now another first down for them. Then of course another Wraiths penalty. Now they're on our twelve yard line about to score. Them bastard's. Two incomplete passes and now it's third down and then dwayne Aaron catches a twelve yard touchdown pass and now it's ten to three, us losing. I don't know about you all but I'm feeling a comeback? Hopefully at least. We convert three third downs in a row when we get the ball back. It's now first down and ten on their twenty eight yard line. Incomplete pass. Second down is an eight yard pass from Mat Akselsen to Frank Harris junior. And then on third down there is two consecutive ten yard penalties. It's now third down and twenty seven and Mat Akselsen throws another bomb to Eric Kennedy this time for a thirty eight yard pass! It's now first and goal on the seven yard line. Mat Akselsen takes the ball steps back to pass and throws a touchdown pass to Frank Harris junior! And the extra point is good! And that is the end of the first quarter all tied up at ten to ten. This is all I have time for tonight. Good night journal.
Word count: 2,520
Thursday June third nineteen forty one.
Today is the day that I tell you all about the new family stuff after my long departure from the league. Well I stopped focusing about half way through last season. Season seven to be exact. It was my second season in the big leagues and I was hungry for a championship. Unfortunately our league is god damn rigged and we lost during the playoff game against the liberty. The liberty would then go on to be defeated against the god damn otters. Four god damn wins in a row. If you were not sick of this league before would you be now? I know I was. I needed a break and my wife knew that. In the off season we flew out to sweden and spent a few months out there. We explored a lot and of course we had roudy sex a lot. And I mean a lot. We would fuck any where we got the chance. In the bathrooms at restaurants on public busses. It was actually pretty fun. So we got back from that and I decided to keep busy. I built a pool in my backyard. Heated of course because Yellowknife is cold as fuck. I cleaned out my garage finally and bought a couple of cars. I got a skyline r-34 gtr imported from Japan. It is a pretty fucking bad ass car. I drive around in that all the time. I also got a 1988 Toyota mr2 that I'm completely rebuilding. It has been a lot of work and that is actually the main reason I have been gone for a while. I have finally finished that little bastard though and now that car is a lot of fun. Man is it quick now. That pool though is no joke either. My God is that son of a bitch a lot of work. I did not hire a pool boy because I thought it would be easy but fuck man this shit sucks a lot. So it's safe to say that next year I am definitely getting a pool boy. Also I am excited to announce that after all that rigours sex me and my wife did it's now coming back to haunt me. She is fucking pregnant again if you can believe that stupid ass shit. We do not know the sex of it yet. We declined to know what it is for now. So that will be our fun little surprise when he or she comes out of my wife's asshole. Just joking of course it is her vag. Anyway, I guess I should get into a little but of football talk her shouldn't I? So I'm on my third season right now and I didn't get through my first season yet. I will be honest I do not remember exactly where I was in my last post and I am not going to go back to re read it so I'll just briefly go over my first season from start to finish and call it a day. So my first season in the football league was season six. So our first game we would play the Philadelphia liberty at home in Yellowknife. Unfortunately we would lose that game thirty three to thirty one. Pretty close to winning but unfortunately pretty close don't get you wins. I went seven for seventy five yards and a touchdown in my first game. Not too shabby. The second game was against the Colorado Yeti at Colorado. We won that game twenty three to nine. A pretty easy victory if I don't say so myself. I went six catches for forty eight yards. The third game was against the Baltimore Hawks in Yellowknife. We won that game thirty four to fourteen. We crushed our bitter rivals and it was nice. I went five for thirty seven that game. At this point we were two and one on the season. The fourth game of the year was against the new Orleans second line. The most stupid fucking name too I'd like to point out. But you'd never guess what happened. We fucking tired that game twenty seven to twenty seven. I went four for sixty six yards that game. After that embarrassing tie to a bad team we faced the orange county otters in Yellowknife and lost. We would lose that game thirty nine to thirteen. Not a very pretty loss. I went one for two that game. Which is pretty unacceptable. Our season record was now two, two and one. The next game was against the San Jose sabercats. We played this one in San Jose. We lost another one. This time it was twenty two to twenty. Another close game we could of won. Making us three two and one on the year. The next was in Yellowknife versus the San Jose sabercats. If you actually read this let me know. Twice in two weeks. But if you could guess it, we lost again. This time it was twenty nine to seventeen. Over these two games I went one catch for five yards and five for sixty six yards. Not my best games ever. But the first was much better. After this game we went four two and one. Up next was orange county otters. We played there in orange county. And we finally broke our losing streak. Winning twenty to seventeen. I went six for fifty three yards and one touchdown. My second of the season. At this point we're one game away from five hundred. At four three and one. The next game was a home game against the arizona outlaws. We would win that game twenty to fourteen. In that game I went three for twelve yards. Back to five hundred. We got to four four and one on the season. Next game was also against the outlaws but this time it was at arizona. We unfortunately lost that game forty one to thirty five. On the season at four five and one. Back on the decline. We played second line next. At new Orleans. We won that game twenty four to twenty. I went a really shitty one for seven that game. The next game we played was against the liberty again. They whooped out asses this game. We lost forty to fourteen. I did two for seventeen. I had a really really awful ending to my year. But we still have a couple of games left to my season! Second to last game we played the yeti. We whooped their ass this game. We beat them sixty six to six. Lots of sixes there, kind of like the devil's number. In this game I only went to three for twenty two. Still not enough. And I could still be doing a lot better. The last game of the season was against the Hawks. This decides who gets in the playoffs. We win we're in. They win, they're in. So who won? Well let's just say it was most definitely us. We beat them forty one to twenty eight. During that game I went two for two. The season ended and the post season was about to start. We would end up going seven six and one. I would go forty eight to four hundred and thirty four with only two touchdowns. An extremely forgettable season. But there's always next year right? Welp this season was over and unfortunately I can't find the stats for post season so I won't be able to go over that. If I remember correctly though, we beat liberty? Maybe? I'm not entirely sure. Maybe we lost to liberty. But anyhow that was a lot of fucking writing wasn't it? I'm not entirely sure what the fuck is going on but I'm tired as fuck so I might go to bed? Good night my sweet sweet little fuck head of a god damn diary. I'm sorry I'm going to bed now. Good night.
Saturday, February sixth eighteen oh two.
I'm just fucking with you diary it's obviously not that date. It's most definitely twenty twenty five. No but deal though right? I love to ramble. It's my absolutely favorite thing to do in the entire world. Well anyway let's get into this new subject of mine. I'll do a little quiz for all the kids here. I'm either A, a hardcore Catholic that thinks if you masterbate you're probably possessed by the devil and you should be killed. Or I'm a satanist that eats baby's. Which one am I? I'm just fucking with you I'm neither of those things. I don't believe in no god damn talking snake or a fucking zombie. I believe in the all mighty Zeus. I'm just kidding again I'm a Christian I just like to joke around. No big deal I hope. But if you're offended go ahead and go to your bathroom and fuck your self because I don't give a fucking shit about you. Fuck I'm really bored tonight diary. What the fuck should I talk about? I don't know anything. Okay okay I know I'm going to get back on track. We're going to take a look at my second season in the Nsfl. We're on season seven now. And I felt from the begging that it would be pretty awesome. And it was, spoiler alert. Okay so let's get things kicked off for this wonderful season seven shall we? So the first game was against the dreadful Colorado Yeti. So here's another spoiler alert, they didn't win a game for two straight years in a row. This season being the second season. Any way I want to do a play by play with me calling the plays again. That was fun and I like it so that's what I'm doing so enjoy! We get the ball first to start the half. We take it down for about a fifty eight yard return. The very first play mat Akselsen gets sacked! For a huge seven yard loss. The next play, the first play on offense was a pass to me. Unfortunately I dropped it. Not a good start. But it's only the first play of the year. Third down and seventeen now and mat drops back to pass he connects with me for a twelve yard catch and it's first down! The very next play Mat Akselsen throws it to Eric Kennedy and it's intercepted! Not a very strong start by our offense. A sack a drop and a interception in just a hand full of plays. Luckily their next three plays consisted of a drop pass, a throw away, and a sack for minus six yards. They would how ever kick a field goal and be up three to nothing early in the first quarter. They would then kick off to us. It's now first down. Three yard rush by our new running back, Robby rainey. The next play in second down is a throw away to avoid a sack, you hate those plays but it's a necessary evil. The next play is a thirty two bomb from Mat Akselsen to Eric Kennedy! A sweet pass and now we are on a roll. A three yard run and a six yard pass play would set up a short third down and one. Unfortunately we would not be able to convert to a first down. We would attempt a forty three yard field goal and non other than the best kicker in the planet, None Forfeit. The kick is up and it is good! The Colorado Yeti would then get the ball back. They would convert one first down and then we of course get a penalty. It's now first and five. A thirteen yard rush and now another first down for them. Then of course another Wraiths penalty. Now they're on our twelve yard line about to score. Them bastard's. Two incomplete passes and now it's third down and then dwayne Aaron catches a twelve yard touchdown pass and now it's ten to three, us losing. I don't know about you all but I'm feeling a comeback? Hopefully at least. We convert three third downs in a row when we get the ball back. It's now first down and ten on their twenty eight yard line. Incomplete pass. Second down is an eight yard pass from Mat Akselsen to Frank Harris junior. And then on third down there is two consecutive ten yard penalties. It's now third down and twenty seven and Mat Akselsen throws another bomb to Eric Kennedy this time for a thirty eight yard pass! It's now first and goal on the seven yard line. Mat Akselsen takes the ball steps back to pass and throws a touchdown pass to Frank Harris junior! And the extra point is good! And that is the end of the first quarter all tied up at ten to ten. This is all I have time for tonight. Good night journal.
Word count: 2,520