Alright season 21 rookies you guys had your fun but there's a new sheriff in town and his name is Phat Boi. Now some of you may be wondering "what makes you qualified to be the next face of the DSFL?" Well my friends I am here to tell you.
First off I am stronger than all of you puny babies so I will force you to have me as your new overlord or I will rearrange your face so you won't even be suitable for magazines. My bull rush is so strong that bull call it a Phat rush. I dare you all to try because trust me when I say you won't like the results.
Secondly I have more drive then all of the other members of my class combined. I will stop at nothing to see a quarterback with their butt on the turf crying for mommy. Now some of you probably think "man that's kind of twisted" but that just shows how weak willed you are. To be the best you have to make the best look like the puny babies they are and thats exactly what I plan to do.
Thirdly I was born to be the face of this league. When I was born god himself looked down on me and said "You will be the face of the DSFL". That's right god himself. I was born a triplet but you best believe I was the first one out. Literally before I could breathe I was already pushing tiny babies like all of you out of my way. My first words were sack but I already know all of your guys last words, "mommy". Growing up with 2 other siblings my age you had to literally fight to get your next meal. Now I didnt do much fighting because I was so intimidating that my other two brothers had no choice but to let me eat my fill. That is why I am so big and my legal name was changed to Phat Boi.
Lastly while all of you are all trying to be friendly and nice with the GMs I am here waiting for one of them to approach me so I can make their lives a living hell. I will put so much fear into them that they will be scared that if they dont draft me I will leave their puny baby team with more broken bones than healthy ones. So GMs if you dont want to change your home field to a hospital you know who to take.
Now for all you NSFL players who think you are safe up on your "superior league" throne. Just know that I am coming for you all too. Once I put the babies to bed this next season my reign of terror will extend to all of you. So enjoy it while you can because Phat Boi is coming and it's going to be a dark day when I arrive. Better go get your mommy's now.
First off I am stronger than all of you puny babies so I will force you to have me as your new overlord or I will rearrange your face so you won't even be suitable for magazines. My bull rush is so strong that bull call it a Phat rush. I dare you all to try because trust me when I say you won't like the results.
Secondly I have more drive then all of the other members of my class combined. I will stop at nothing to see a quarterback with their butt on the turf crying for mommy. Now some of you probably think "man that's kind of twisted" but that just shows how weak willed you are. To be the best you have to make the best look like the puny babies they are and thats exactly what I plan to do.
Thirdly I was born to be the face of this league. When I was born god himself looked down on me and said "You will be the face of the DSFL". That's right god himself. I was born a triplet but you best believe I was the first one out. Literally before I could breathe I was already pushing tiny babies like all of you out of my way. My first words were sack but I already know all of your guys last words, "mommy". Growing up with 2 other siblings my age you had to literally fight to get your next meal. Now I didnt do much fighting because I was so intimidating that my other two brothers had no choice but to let me eat my fill. That is why I am so big and my legal name was changed to Phat Boi.
Lastly while all of you are all trying to be friendly and nice with the GMs I am here waiting for one of them to approach me so I can make their lives a living hell. I will put so much fear into them that they will be scared that if they dont draft me I will leave their puny baby team with more broken bones than healthy ones. So GMs if you dont want to change your home field to a hospital you know who to take.
Now for all you NSFL players who think you are safe up on your "superior league" throne. Just know that I am coming for you all too. Once I put the babies to bed this next season my reign of terror will extend to all of you. So enjoy it while you can because Phat Boi is coming and it's going to be a dark day when I arrive. Better go get your mommy's now.
![[Image: 61237_s.png]](https://signavatar.com/61237_s.png)
![[Image: TlcmoPk.gif]](https://i.imgur.com/TlcmoPk.gif)
