Although there is still (hopefully) a ways to go for the Yellowknife Wraiths and their defensive tackle, Absolute Unit, to go before the end of the season, it is true that there comes a time when you must consider your offseason plans. For Unit, he is going to focus on doing everything he can to not be in the frozen tundra hellscape that is Yellowknife, Norwest Territories, Canada. He will likely instead venture south, to warmer climates, and partake in the culture there. Perhaps the Caribbean islands will suit his needs, with their white sandy beaches, crystal clear waters, and glistening sunshine. Not to mention all the delicious food that he will have access to, including jerk chicken and other island favorites. The Wraiths have made the playoffs for three seasons in a row now, which means he has not been able to enjoy an offseason to its fullest but he will do his best.
The offseason for Armor Queen brings a different level of joy that she has to sit on all during the season. Once she finishes tearing apart defenses, she heads back home to Wales to tear apart local LARPers to keep her claim on Excalibur. Many try to play some part of wannabe knights that claim the sword since they believe it to be some fake replica that Armor Queen purchased at a cosplay store or on Amazon. Quickly they learn that her sword fighting skills are far above her football skills. Day or night, she rests in her small cabin hidden among the acres of farmland that her family passed to her once she graduated university and waits for any new challengers. The only time she ends her campaign to defend Excalibur is when training picks back up where she brings her trusted sword with her to camp. Even while away from home, if she hears from a challenger, she meets them as soon as possible to prove her strength.
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They call him Mr. Worldwide. Referring to Pitbull of course.
Listen, we’re taking an Air Canada CRJ-900 from Yellowknife to Calgary. Then we’re flying a Westjet 787 to Rome. When in Rome as they say. Then we are taking a train or a rental car to the Almafi Coast. We are going to the Isle of Capri. Then we are going north, by train or by car, whichever is easier, we are hitting the Alps. We are full sending it. Call that s*&% backpacking. Then we are going to Slovenia, and we just keep going east. Croatia, Hungary, Romania. Cluj-Napoca type s*&% you heard? It’s not what you heard, it’s what you hearin, listen! As the great poet Earl Simmons once said. We find the best pancake. We take that recipe home. Call that the 3 TPE pancake. What’s it stand for? Nobody knows, it’s provocative, gets the people going. And we’re back in time for training camp. That’s a wrap.
Vincent Sharpei Jr. of the Chicago Butchers Is looking forward for the first time in a long time to the off-season. As you know, as you get older, it gets harder and harder to push through an entire season without any bumps and bruises and it has been a long one coming for Vincent Sharpei Jr. This year has been the most taxing on him, as he just isn’t as young as he once was and every day is becoming more and more tolling on his body. You can see it in his eyes, that retirement is coming for him sooner than later. I think what Vincent Sharpei Jr. most looks forward to is just being home, relaxing, and letting his body rest and recover after taking many all those hits as his quarterback has been also feeling the age bug. Vincent Sharpei Jr. looks forward to just getting some nice couch time and tv time with some ice cream.
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Cornelius King III is like many of you guys. He uses his break from the playing field to spend quality time with family and friends away on vacation. Some of the key places he wishes to visit include Hawaii , Mexico and his family in Somalia.
Cornelius King III also spends a portion of the offseason (like every player) preparing for next season. He'll spend time with trainers working out or find large workout facilities to train with his fellow Dallas Birdog teammates. He's even considering, for the first time since he left for the DSFL, visiting his alma mater, LSU, to train with his old college coaches. Cornelius King III would also have time to enjoy sports he used to play when he was younger, like basketball, on a more recreational level. (In college, he was a college hooper at LSU.) Cornelius also has many organisations he loves, and he feels like the offseason is the perfect opportunity to give back to them. He plans to help provide for those raising funds for causes that are close to his heart.
The idea of traveling might seem crazy for someone like me who spends 6 months each year traveling around the world playing football, but once you are used to the travel lifestyle it is really hard to settle down for some people. I have that problem as well. On top of keeping up with a regular training schedule and helping with charity events with the team around Germany; I spend most of my time traveling to live events around the world that I was not able to attend during the football season. So, you see, bands tour around the world and the timing doesn't normally work out for me to find a day off to see them when they perform in Germany, so I learned that the best course of action is to just travel to them! I fly to the US, Italy or Mexico, or anywhere in between to see the bands, I missed out on seeing at home! My first flight is to London to see Muse perform!
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