01-14-2021, 09:28 PM
(This post was last modified: 01-14-2021, 10:06 PM by ForSucksFake.)
PBE PT
20) Well, I am certainly glad injuries don't exist in the league. I assumed they did, for some reason, until my second or third season. I would probably be asked to play wide receiver for Chicago if injuries became a problem for the team. Before I was traded to Chicago, I was a wide receiver. In fact, people all around the league were asking why the team traded for me when they already had Sean O'Leary and had traded for Bender Rodriguez. In the DSFL, I was a two-time Pro Bowler and a two-time finalist for Wide Receiver of the Year. Even with the archetype change this offseason, I could have done it decently. My hands were really high before the change and they hadn't knocked off 10 speed from my attributes. Some of the position switches in the league have been puzzling to me. Mine was a good example because I went from a heavy, yet wiry wide receiver to a very heavy defensive tackle. My guess is that I would play somewhat like Jerome Bettis or William Perry with all that excess weight and mass down between the numbers on short slants. If I were coaching me at emergency wide receiver, I would put me in the slot for short-yardage situations.
26) My player's biggest New Years' resolution is probably winning Defensive Tackle of the Year. This was his best year to date, and if you consult with the stat sheet, the best year by any defensive tackle in the league this year. For whatever reason, 11 sacks (1 for DTs, tied for 2 in the league) doesn't get you hardware. So with a new archetype, new awards rules, and a fourth season in the Chicago system, this year is going to be crucial for my player. I've kind of cooled down on my trash talk since making it into the ISFL, but if I have a good year; you're going to hear all about it for me. I'd be lying if I said that not winning DToTY didn't bum me out. The biggest reason why was because of my archetype change, I'm not sure how effective I will be. I felt like this last season was my prom. I guess it's fitting because I did get screwed on prom night. If I get pregnant, I'm blaming the people who doctored the rules for awards. I'm getting pretty close to regression so it's going to be critical for me to get the best performance possible out of myself so I don't go home empty-handed. I know I'm not going to the hall of fame, so a personal award or two would go a long way.
17) Oh, boy. You're gonna love this next act for the Ultimus Choccy Milk Halftime Show! Grant McDonald is a beloved country, pop, folk, and rock musician who we believe hails from Canada. Before the dawn of TikTok, Grant McDonald was the king of social media music. You can watch countless videos of streams being sniped with Grant McDonald's biggest hits such as "Ram Ranch," "Deep, Deep, Deep," "Prince Harry," "Love You Shawn," "Ram Ranch 3," "Ram Ranch 85," and "A Billion Bucks Raw." No Canadian artist can come close to rivaling the prolific song-writing and hit-making career of Grant McDonald. He's got one of the biggest followings in music. Nobody has a single bad thing to say about Grant. He is the Bob Dylan of the 2010s and 2020s. Do you want a spectacle? Grant packs it in gallons. Don't believe me? Where else can you see eighteen naked cowboys dancing on stage to the pounding metal riffs of Grant McDonald's golden records. Do you know why the game gets better after halftime? It's because the players were listening to the halftime show getting pumped up. After a Grant McDonald halftime show, don't be surprised to see ten touchdowns scored by each team. Even JuJu is going to be dancing on TikTok during this halftime show.
20) Well, I am certainly glad injuries don't exist in the league. I assumed they did, for some reason, until my second or third season. I would probably be asked to play wide receiver for Chicago if injuries became a problem for the team. Before I was traded to Chicago, I was a wide receiver. In fact, people all around the league were asking why the team traded for me when they already had Sean O'Leary and had traded for Bender Rodriguez. In the DSFL, I was a two-time Pro Bowler and a two-time finalist for Wide Receiver of the Year. Even with the archetype change this offseason, I could have done it decently. My hands were really high before the change and they hadn't knocked off 10 speed from my attributes. Some of the position switches in the league have been puzzling to me. Mine was a good example because I went from a heavy, yet wiry wide receiver to a very heavy defensive tackle. My guess is that I would play somewhat like Jerome Bettis or William Perry with all that excess weight and mass down between the numbers on short slants. If I were coaching me at emergency wide receiver, I would put me in the slot for short-yardage situations.
26) My player's biggest New Years' resolution is probably winning Defensive Tackle of the Year. This was his best year to date, and if you consult with the stat sheet, the best year by any defensive tackle in the league this year. For whatever reason, 11 sacks (1 for DTs, tied for 2 in the league) doesn't get you hardware. So with a new archetype, new awards rules, and a fourth season in the Chicago system, this year is going to be crucial for my player. I've kind of cooled down on my trash talk since making it into the ISFL, but if I have a good year; you're going to hear all about it for me. I'd be lying if I said that not winning DToTY didn't bum me out. The biggest reason why was because of my archetype change, I'm not sure how effective I will be. I felt like this last season was my prom. I guess it's fitting because I did get screwed on prom night. If I get pregnant, I'm blaming the people who doctored the rules for awards. I'm getting pretty close to regression so it's going to be critical for me to get the best performance possible out of myself so I don't go home empty-handed. I know I'm not going to the hall of fame, so a personal award or two would go a long way.
17) Oh, boy. You're gonna love this next act for the Ultimus Choccy Milk Halftime Show! Grant McDonald is a beloved country, pop, folk, and rock musician who we believe hails from Canada. Before the dawn of TikTok, Grant McDonald was the king of social media music. You can watch countless videos of streams being sniped with Grant McDonald's biggest hits such as "Ram Ranch," "Deep, Deep, Deep," "Prince Harry," "Love You Shawn," "Ram Ranch 3," "Ram Ranch 85," and "A Billion Bucks Raw." No Canadian artist can come close to rivaling the prolific song-writing and hit-making career of Grant McDonald. He's got one of the biggest followings in music. Nobody has a single bad thing to say about Grant. He is the Bob Dylan of the 2010s and 2020s. Do you want a spectacle? Grant packs it in gallons. Don't believe me? Where else can you see eighteen naked cowboys dancing on stage to the pounding metal riffs of Grant McDonald's golden records. Do you know why the game gets better after halftime? It's because the players were listening to the halftime show getting pumped up. After a Grant McDonald halftime show, don't be surprised to see ten touchdowns scored by each team. Even JuJu is going to be dancing on TikTok during this halftime show.