(04-06-2023, 12:56 PM)juniped Wrote:(04-06-2023, 12:47 PM)Hallmonitor_20 Wrote:(04-06-2023, 12:41 PM)juniped Wrote:(04-06-2023, 11:47 AM)Hallmonitor_20 Wrote:
JENNI'S DEFINITIVE MOCK DRAFT
1: OLIVER TOLLIVER @Memento Mori Who could pass on the #1 Wide Receiver in the draft? Plus, his name fucking rhymes!!! How sick is that! 2: ROLUND ONYXGUT @crash1005 This guy is a fucking dwarf, with a hammer!!! No other player has a had such a great defensive performance in the Ultimus!!! 3: DJ MACLEAN @Urq660 #1 Linebacker you will see anywhere!!! This guy is from the fucking Scottish highlands, one of the prettiest places in the world, but not as pretty as Bondi Beach !!! 4: MALIK BROOKS @AK41 Firmly underrated as a rusher, this guy fucking rules!!! Made me a sick graphic when I was drafted!!! 5: AMANDA HUGANDKISS @Quisvilius Literally the most clutch safety of all time !!! Made the play of the game in the Ultimus to seal a Bondi Beach comeback!!! 6: BURNT TOAST @ToastCharger Burnt Toast's name does not give him enough credit!!! In my opinion, a well-cooked toast can be delicious!!! Do not count out Burnt Toast!! 7: BOB KICKERSON @Tiktaalik We won the Ultimus because opposing kickers had the fear of Bob in them in the playoffs!!! They went 1/6 on field goals, allowing the Bucs to win easily!!! Meanwhile Bob Kickerson has never missed a kick in his life! 8: MYRTLE BEACH TOLLIVER @scorycory BBB War room GOAT!!! The #2 Tolliver on the draft boards, but first in my heart!!! 10: MARY MARIE @aeonsjenni I am a great prospect, no doubt!!! But my draft stock is falling, because I cannot count!!! 11: IVAN BALDWIN @MrNoPass This corn will easily out-perform the other corn CB in the ISFL, because he is a member of the greatest team on earth !!! 12: SCRUFFY THE JANITOR @pazuzu You may think that Scruffy the Janitor is just a normal old janitor, but no!!!! He's actually from the fucking future!!! 13: QUARL WALKINS III @LilOslicki Even if Quarl Walkins III has been inactive for months, they've still got a ring!!! Unlike the losers from the other, non-buc teams!!! 14: KAIRO KNIGHT @Akoustique The #1 GM available, Akou doesn't care that he's already been drafted!! Every team will want to draft the best GM in the world ASAP!!! 15: PLANT BASED @Thor No team will be able to resist re-drafting Thor, so that they can fire him again!!! |
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