Gambino would be on WHEEL OF FORTUNE and nail the final puzzle.
[div align=\"center\"][/div]
05-07-2018, 06:00 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-08-2018, 07:50 PM by Scootalicious.)
"Oh, there was this one time I was invited onto a new up and coming reality show with a bunch of other football players and DSFL players/upcoming rookies. It was called "Mayfield's Brown Town" and it was mostly run by the Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield. He described it as "Jersey Shore, but with football, and drinking, but you already knew that, hee hee." And I swear every other man in there yelled out, in unison I'm telling you, "hee hee". It was like he was leading a pack of sheep or something. Anyways, on the first day of filming we stayed in a rented Cleveland mansion, owned (well, rented) by Baker for the show. I had this decent room, but pretty much nothing in it except for like a singles bed. I asked why I didn't get a decked out room or anything and all I got was "Dude, I didn't even get my game check yet, calm down." So I just put my clothes down and tried to take a nap, but Mayfield said we would instantly start filming, and he grabs a camera, yells at it some unintelligible shit, and busts into everyone's room yelling his off that he was going to a Super Bro-Bowl. He pulled out case upon case of Coors Light and started downing drinks like it was his past time hobby (and I'm pretty sure it was). He started dancing and thrashing and hitting shit, and he knocked some linebacker out and ran outside to get away. Eventually the cops came and he tried running, but he was really drunk so there was no chance he was getting out of there okay. It was pretty funny. The whole idea soon collapsed after that and I don't think the Browns ever got that Super Bro-Bowl."
- James Brown, on reality shows
[FONT=Times][div align=center]
Recently Dwayne Aaron was invited to the game show called "Oles is out of ideas and he is a desperate failure so please send him literally any fucking PT idea" On this game show everyone got to yell out the stupidest fucking idea they could think of for a PT. Then the judges got to score the PT's and the worst score got to be a PT for the NSFL. When Dwayne Aaron appeared on the show he suggested that the next PT be about each players experience in their most recent game. However some fucktard named craig or something stupid yelled something about a gameshow. Oles, being the fucking idiot that he is, immediately left the building with that man. We don't know if he is still alive or dead or locked in Oles closet, but what we do know is that the stupidest fucking PT was submitted the next day. Dwayne was quite grumpy, because now he has to write about some dumbass shit about a game show, and can't even reach 200 words. I don't understand how these people expect the Weekly PT and Weekend PT to still be around in 4 more seasons, like soon enough Oles is going to make us write a review about fucking Frozen or some fuckass movie. I'll actually be right back, I'm going to make a suggestion in the suggestion box.
enough fucking words
Is this the worst prompt ever? Well you haven't seen nothing yet! Watch this TUESDAY NIGHT as STAR ATHLETES answer questions tweeted in by YOU THE VIEWER.
THAT'S RIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN we have decided that our typical prompt writer for celebrity interviews just isn't very good at his job so we are LITERALLY letting ANYBODY submit prompts! And you know its fair because we use a random number generator to select the prompts! It doesn't matter who writes them - a grandma, a child, a vegetable, a troll, a Russian, shill, or a bot, we have COMPLETE FAITH that whatever RANDOM PROMPT WE PICK will be a great one! Watch this TUESDAY NIGHT as NSFL star quarterback Borkus Maximus III answers YOUR PROMPTS. Questions like what type of underwear do you wear? Talk about three different foods found at baseball games! What's your favorite movie? Talk about your dream half time show! And much more! Who submitted these Prompts, you may ask? Was it a monkey? Was it a 12 year old? Who knows! That's the fun of it! And our guests have to answer it anyways! This is a TV event that you DO NOT WANT TO MISS. Tune in Tuesday night for your weekly dose of CELEBRITIES ANSWER RANDOM PROMPTS (we're still working on the name) (218 words)
If Trey Willie is going to be appearing on any TV show, it would have to be Press Your Luck. Being the sneaky conman that he is, he would likely try to follow in the footsteps of Michael Larson who went on the game show nearly 34 years ago and robbed the place blind in front of TV cameras and a live studio audience. Using just a VCR (you young kids can ask your senior team members to explain this to you) and some free time, he was able to memorize the game board and go on to win the equivalent of $250,000 which at the time was the largest one day game show haul in history. With the way I prepare myself for any competitive event, knowing what is possible, I would strive to be on a game show like that where preparation is better than luck. Plus, who wouldn’t want to live out their lives in game shows infamy. Yeah sure everyone knows who Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter are but those guys are nerds and nobody wants to strive to be like that at least not I. You can catch me on Press Your Luck. Big bucks, big bucks, no whammies!
[div align=center][/select]
[div align=center]
You know that weird show 'Naked and Afraid'? Is it even still on? I don't know but we're going to assume it is. Angus Winchester was on that show, and he was naked. But he wasn't afraid. The wilderness was afraid. So for those of you who are unfamiliar, Naked and Afraid takes a handful of people and drops them into the wilderness naked with a camera crew. These folks are usually some sort of self-taught survivors but there's sometimes a scrub in there too, just for shits and giggles. These folks gotta make their way through a jungle and eat and eventually escape to safety. And they're naked. It's honestly a boring show but whatever.
So they accept Angus Winchester one season and drop the 265lb monster of a man into the Alaskan wilderness, it's summer so they aren't freezing at least. Well the people also on the show he finds them in short order and they're all some skinny pretty people who think they're just the shit at surviving, until they run into a hungry pack of wolves one night setting up camp. These "survival experts" start screaming as wolves begin snapping at their limbs and shit and wake up Winchester who was snoring nearby. Winchester clearly perturbed by the interruption in his sleep gets up, grabs the nearest wolf that was on top of a cameraman and launches the thing into a tree, snapping its neck. He then jumps on top of a second one and grabs a rock, smashing its skill in. The other wolves start to back off, but not before Winchester grabs a nearby fallen log and flings it at them, knocking a third unconscious. The remaining wolves run away. Winchester, covered in blood from the second wolf, grunts and goes back to sleep. They were airlifted out that night. Hank Winchester (S25 - Current) - Scrub
Angus Winchester (S1-S12) - 4x Ultimus Champ - #2 Career Sacks - Hall of Fame
Cooter Bigsby (S14-S23) - S23 Ultimus Champ - #4 Career Yards - #4 Career TDs - 2x MVP - Hall of Fame
Will Harrison appeared as a guest star on Storage Wars: Canada, when the show did a special stop on his hometown of Orangeville. Unfortunately, the producers did not think this idea through. While it was certainly novel for the local Orangevillers to see the only famous person from their town, Harrison had a huge leg up on the competition.
You see, Orangeville only has two storage sites. The majority of Orangevillers have sizeable yard space to store their belongings in, as well. That made identifying the former owners of abandoned storage lockers by the contents somewhat easy. Harrison held his tongue patiently as promising looking lockers went by, and waited. Finally, they arrived at a locker with a pungent musky odor. All that was visible from the door was an old mattress and a stack of dissolving local newspapers. That and a broken grandfather clock. The clock was key. Local legend had it that millionaire Rod Ruperts had sold all of his land and properties and become a vagrant, when that clock broke. He left all of his belongings in a storage locker and was never seen or heard of again. This was that locker. This was Harrison's ticket to easy victory.
Alright so being chosen to be on the Bachelorette is an incredible honor and I was super excited about my chance to find totally real and not contrived at all love over the course of like 3 weeks or however long they shoot for but that's when the plot twist was announced and I found out Connor Tanner would also be on the show so obviously since we're massive rivals after he forced my teammates and ~TOTALLY ACTIVE AND CONTRIBUTING MEMBERS OF THE SITE~ to retire against their will and has since tried to sabotage my career as has been well documented in NSFL PT history so for the two of us to competing for the same woman "of our dreams" should be very dramatic and filled with back stabbery, subterfuge, sabotage, bamboozled, and undermining that will likely result in both of us being sent home but as long as he doesn't win I'm totally okay with that outcome even if it ruins my shot finding my wife which is a completely plausible outcome from the show and would certainly not result in a broken engagement within months because obviously the person ABC selected to be The Bachelorette just so happens to be my soul mate so if I don't win the show I'm doomed to a life of solitude and loneliness but at least I'll be able to go to the wedding of Borkus Maximus and Terrell Brister and see them make a commitment to their soul mate.
Code: 249 words |
|