09-30-2019, 04:32 AM
(This post was last modified: 10-02-2019, 07:59 AM by goodvsevil1275.)
I aint no genius like the other guys who can make 50k word articles and I don’t even really know what positions are most valuable. I also haven’t really looked at the trades/retirements or anything so I don’t know if some of the stuff im saying is even correct. So here is what I think the first round of the draft might look like.
1. Bjørn Ironside DT (THICC article boi) . To me it looks like the Second Line only have one active Defensive tackle and who wouldn’t want to draft the guy who puts out huge articles and is the highest TP DT of the class. Bjørn had 5 sacks, 3 tackles for a loss, and 1 forced fumble.
2. Maurice Virtanen LB. The Liberty only have one active LB as far as I can see, so why not take the highest TP Linebacker in the class. I could also see them drafting a Defensive linemen but Virtanen might be the right choice. Virtanen had the second most tackles last season at 157. He also had 2 sacks, 2 forced fumbles, and 3 tackles for a loss.
3. Louisiana Purchase CB. It doesn’t really look like the Otters need much and they just won it all. Sounds like a pretty good spot to be in. While the Otters have some decent players at CB they are starting to get old so I think It would be a good idea to freshen up by grabbing Louisiana. I originally chose Pete Parker to go here but after looking over the Otter’s team again I think Louisiana is a better choice. This season he led the league in ints at a whopping 7! He also tied for most touchdowns on defense at 2.
4. Zach Hall DE. The Yeti aint got shit on the dline besides Bubba Thumper so I reckon they would grab someone to play there with their first pick. Even after changing from TE to DE Hall is the second highest TP on the dline in this class which probably means he is the second linemen to get taken. Hall had 15 pancakes as a TE this season. Let's hope he can do that on the other side of the ball with his new team.
5. Bender Bending Rodriguez WR (Bending god). Seems like the SaberCats only have 2 wr’s. 1 is inactive and the other is getting old so they need to grab one right away. The cats could grab either Bender or Biggums here, but I am going with Bender because Tijuana is the best team ever and you can’t change my mind . Bender was 4th in the league in receiving yards with 912. He also had the second highest avg.
6. Pete Parker S (Spoderman?). New Orleans has 3 safeties but 2 are getting pretty old and the other is inactive so I think that with their second pick in the first round they should grab Pete Parker. I think that the second line only has 2 linebackers so they might pick up one of those instead. Pete didn’t have any crazy stats like few of players listed above but he still had 98 tackles, 2 forced fumbles, and a sack.
7. Marcella T?riki RB (Queen) . I think I saw something about one of the wraiths rb’s retiring so why not draft one. While being the workhorse for Norfolk, T?riki managed to run for 1785 yards and 9 td’s with her longest run being only 22 yards. Even though she led the league in rushing yards, she wasn’t the most efficient. T?riki only averaged 4.2 yards on 430 attempts. Ruff Ruff might be the better choice but I ain't no draft wizard.
8. Ruff Ruff RB (Bork bork). Arizona has most positions taken care of but their running backs are aging and what better to assist old people than a doggo. This good boi was a tad bit more efficient than T?riki even though he ran for 300 less yards. Ruff Ruff had 1438 yards rushing and led the league in rushing touchdowns with 14. He averaged 5.2 yards and had a long of 59. Those last 3 stats all being better than T?riki’s. Maybe he deserves to be drafted higher. I have no idea.
9. Tyrone Biggums WR. As I mentioned above, the Otters don’t really need a whole lot so why not try to replace one of your aging possibly inactive wide receivers. Biggums with 5th in receiving yards with 774 and 5th in avg at 13.8. He also had 6 td’s though which was tied in a threeway for third most for the season.
10. Jake Dropson WR (Dropson sux lmao). Doesn’t look like Austin has a ton of needs either but I only see 2 Wide receivers on their roster so they should probably grab Dropson here because there aren’t many more decent wide receivers once he is picked. The only other position I could see them grabbing are a cornerback and there is a lot more depth at corner in this class than there is wide receiver. Dropson only had 449 yards receiving with an average of 10.2. Even though those stats aren’t impressive he did manage to be a part of the 6 touchdown gangbang mentioned in the pick above.
It may not be 100 pages long but this a bit of a write up of where I could see some of the players going in the first round. I will probably be super wrong but it was a bit fun doing this. Thanks for reading.
1. Bjørn Ironside DT (THICC article boi) . To me it looks like the Second Line only have one active Defensive tackle and who wouldn’t want to draft the guy who puts out huge articles and is the highest TP DT of the class. Bjørn had 5 sacks, 3 tackles for a loss, and 1 forced fumble.
2. Maurice Virtanen LB. The Liberty only have one active LB as far as I can see, so why not take the highest TP Linebacker in the class. I could also see them drafting a Defensive linemen but Virtanen might be the right choice. Virtanen had the second most tackles last season at 157. He also had 2 sacks, 2 forced fumbles, and 3 tackles for a loss.
3. Louisiana Purchase CB. It doesn’t really look like the Otters need much and they just won it all. Sounds like a pretty good spot to be in. While the Otters have some decent players at CB they are starting to get old so I think It would be a good idea to freshen up by grabbing Louisiana. I originally chose Pete Parker to go here but after looking over the Otter’s team again I think Louisiana is a better choice. This season he led the league in ints at a whopping 7! He also tied for most touchdowns on defense at 2.
4. Zach Hall DE. The Yeti aint got shit on the dline besides Bubba Thumper so I reckon they would grab someone to play there with their first pick. Even after changing from TE to DE Hall is the second highest TP on the dline in this class which probably means he is the second linemen to get taken. Hall had 15 pancakes as a TE this season. Let's hope he can do that on the other side of the ball with his new team.
5. Bender Bending Rodriguez WR (Bending god). Seems like the SaberCats only have 2 wr’s. 1 is inactive and the other is getting old so they need to grab one right away. The cats could grab either Bender or Biggums here, but I am going with Bender because Tijuana is the best team ever and you can’t change my mind . Bender was 4th in the league in receiving yards with 912. He also had the second highest avg.
6. Pete Parker S (Spoderman?). New Orleans has 3 safeties but 2 are getting pretty old and the other is inactive so I think that with their second pick in the first round they should grab Pete Parker. I think that the second line only has 2 linebackers so they might pick up one of those instead. Pete didn’t have any crazy stats like few of players listed above but he still had 98 tackles, 2 forced fumbles, and a sack.
7. Marcella T?riki RB (Queen) . I think I saw something about one of the wraiths rb’s retiring so why not draft one. While being the workhorse for Norfolk, T?riki managed to run for 1785 yards and 9 td’s with her longest run being only 22 yards. Even though she led the league in rushing yards, she wasn’t the most efficient. T?riki only averaged 4.2 yards on 430 attempts. Ruff Ruff might be the better choice but I ain't no draft wizard.
8. Ruff Ruff RB (Bork bork). Arizona has most positions taken care of but their running backs are aging and what better to assist old people than a doggo. This good boi was a tad bit more efficient than T?riki even though he ran for 300 less yards. Ruff Ruff had 1438 yards rushing and led the league in rushing touchdowns with 14. He averaged 5.2 yards and had a long of 59. Those last 3 stats all being better than T?riki’s. Maybe he deserves to be drafted higher. I have no idea.
9. Tyrone Biggums WR. As I mentioned above, the Otters don’t really need a whole lot so why not try to replace one of your aging possibly inactive wide receivers. Biggums with 5th in receiving yards with 774 and 5th in avg at 13.8. He also had 6 td’s though which was tied in a threeway for third most for the season.
10. Jake Dropson WR (Dropson sux lmao). Doesn’t look like Austin has a ton of needs either but I only see 2 Wide receivers on their roster so they should probably grab Dropson here because there aren’t many more decent wide receivers once he is picked. The only other position I could see them grabbing are a cornerback and there is a lot more depth at corner in this class than there is wide receiver. Dropson only had 449 yards receiving with an average of 10.2. Even though those stats aren’t impressive he did manage to be a part of the 6 touchdown gangbang mentioned in the pick above.
It may not be 100 pages long but this a bit of a write up of where I could see some of the players going in the first round. I will probably be super wrong but it was a bit fun doing this. Thanks for reading.