12-04-2019, 10:45 PM
(This post was last modified: 12-13-2019, 01:35 PM by Fordhammer.)
It is with a heavy heart that I write this media. I was out celebrating New Orleans' latest victory when I received a phone call from my agent. The message was clear: stop partying with New Orleans, there is a problem with your contract.
I immediately sobered up (as much as I could) and left for home so I could discuss this with my agent in private. Upon arriving at home my agent filled me in: my upcoming contract is probably invalid due to New Orleans' not keeping up their end of the contract.
As announced my contract has a clause that Tom Hanks must make me a "free agent pitch" power point with the last slide containing at least one meme for the final offer. My agent regrettably informed me that no such thing was given to her office and my contract is most likely null and void. My agent sent numerous inquiries to the team and received nothing but doots in return.
It took me a bit to process the news. I was floored. Was it the drugs? The booze? Just the unusual blindside from New Orleans? I spent some time talking it over with my agent and we worked out some potential destinations for me to call my home next season. Without further ado, below are my NSFL free agent destination rankings:
LAST PLACE....
Everyone else.
FIRST PLACE....
Any team that makes me a power point.
Thank you for taking your time to read this extremely saddening message. I am going to take some time with my family and try and figure out where we are going next.
I immediately sobered up (as much as I could) and left for home so I could discuss this with my agent in private. Upon arriving at home my agent filled me in: my upcoming contract is probably invalid due to New Orleans' not keeping up their end of the contract.
As announced my contract has a clause that Tom Hanks must make me a "free agent pitch" power point with the last slide containing at least one meme for the final offer. My agent regrettably informed me that no such thing was given to her office and my contract is most likely null and void. My agent sent numerous inquiries to the team and received nothing but doots in return.
It took me a bit to process the news. I was floored. Was it the drugs? The booze? Just the unusual blindside from New Orleans? I spent some time talking it over with my agent and we worked out some potential destinations for me to call my home next season. Without further ado, below are my NSFL free agent destination rankings:
LAST PLACE....
Everyone else.
FIRST PLACE....
Any team that makes me a power point.
Thank you for taking your time to read this extremely saddening message. I am going to take some time with my family and try and figure out where we are going next.
Thank you to @bfry for the signature!