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Introduction:
What's up party people! I got bored and decided that I wanted more money, so I figured "Why not steal LGMForever's idea and make an NSFL themed Hunger Games?" So, I did just that, and here we are. If you're in here, it's not because I don't like you, it's because you're a controversial player/personality within this league. In fact, I can say that I think positively of a few of the people in here. So, sit back, relax, and let's see who'll win this stupid idea I stole because I want to buy equipment for the next 2 seasons. Also, none of this is personal or inflammatory in any way, and is not intended to be interpreted in such a way. The images and descriptions used for these people are merely caricatured versions of themselves, and should not be interpreted literally.
The Contestants:
This is a varied cast, but some of you might not know why they're in here, or what they've done. So I'll go ahead and explain that to you.
@caltroit_red_flames is a notoriously controversial person in this league. Some know him as the new head of the graphics department, others know him as the guy who argues with @White Cornerback constantly in the main Discord server. Most people, however, know him as the guy who just can't stop saying "give us a fair rub." Now, superficially, that looks like a demand of an inappropriate nature. But, if you truly understand the context of that statement, you'd realize that he's just trying to get more offensive linemen in the Pro Bowl. And he won't shut up about it. The render that I used for himl in this is Jared Lorenzen, who is the heaviest Quarterback in NFL history. Why? Because, as the leader of the OL Rights Movement, one can say that he's the Quarterback, or the mastermind, behind the entire thing. Plus, Jared Lorenzen was fat, so it fits. The rest of the tributes should make sure to stay on their toes, because Hefty Lefty's here, and he's sure to come out swinging.
@iamslm22 is known as the former commissioner of this league, and the current owner of the league. But what most people don't know about him is that he's a Penn State fan. Penn State kinda sucks. One of their coaches did something bad. That's really all I know about Penn State. I still think that they suck. My opinion has nothing to do with the coach thing, I promise. Anyway, he's also controversial for the rant he made about Myrtle Beach, and for occasionally taking the unpopular, but rational side, in league-related arguments. His render is the Penn State logo because he likes Penn State. So, in conclusion, something something claws, because this kitty's not here to play around.
@Vorshayla is the current CB1 for the San Jose SaberCats, which is also a roster spot that I plan on taking in a season or two. But most people really know him for starting arguments with just about everyone, and especially @
@UpperNet is controversial because he... uh... I don't know. But what I do know is that he one day hopes to be GM of an expansion team named the Silverbacks. That alone gives him a spot in this competition, because no one likes gorillas. His render is a gorilla because he likes gorillas. That's it.
@WannabeFinn is really only on this list for one reason. Other than the fact that he's probably a Cleveland Browns fan, he's most notoriously known for making @Sermokala turn into a resentful demon full of rage and hatred every time that he's seen in the replies of a thread that Sermo has happened to come across. Now, the question you're probably asking is: Why? To be completely honest, I don't really know. The only thing that I know about their bitter and completely one-sided feud is that Finn apparently won an award over Sermo or something, and now Sermo hates him. That's about it. His render is Baker Mayfield because he likes the Browns.
@gucci is known for being the founder and former GM of the Dallas Birddogs, who are themselves notorious for letting their players have countless feuds with those of other DSFL teams. Gucci himself seems to have rustled the jimmies of several other teams as well. Despite all of this, he was a good GM during his tenure. His render is White Goodman wrestling a bull, because his player is literally White Goodman. I don't know how well dodgeball skills will translate to the simulator, but we'll just have to wait and see.
@`AirCrou` is the former GM of the Portland Pythons, who are in competition with the Buccaneers and Birddogs for the title of Most Controversial DSFL Team. He, as an individual, is known for appearing often on punishment threads to state his opinion. More often than not, this causes arguments that are very fun for spectators to watch. Most recently, though, Crou was the one to receive the short end of the stick this time, and was forced by HO to retire. His render is Giannis Antetokounmpo for no other reason than the fact that I think he's from Greece. SO he'll dunk on your or something. On to the next competitor.
@bex is on this list because, as the commissioner, she's bound to have been involved in at least a couple of controversies during he on-going reign. The biggest one I can think of are the tampering allegations, which are unproven, but very likely to have been true. Despite the punishments, she's been doing a good job at handling the responsibilities given to her, which I respect. Doesn't make her exempt from this competition, though.
@jeffie43 is in this competition due to being known as the king of tampering 57 TPE IA players into rejoining the league. He also happens to suck at playing Madden. Additionally, he is also known as @Drizzy's son. As one of the most notorious users in the history of this league, he gets an easy spot on this list.
Plato, Aristotle, and Socrates have joined the fight. Head Office is known for being the root of every controversy in the history of this league. But it's not really their fault, because they're the ones who have to hand out punishments. Regardless, it's hard to find someone who doesn't have an opinion of them, good or bad, so they get an easy spot on this list.
@DeathOnReddit was once known as the most feared member of HO. He was judge, jury, and executioner. During his reign, the NSFL was known by some as the No S Fun League, before the eventual rebrand to what it is today, the Not Safe For Life. Some loved him, some hated him, some were indifferent, which gives him a spot on in this competition.
@Gwdjohnson is the 57 TPE IA that @jeffie43 allegedly tampered. That's pretty controversial in my book.
Now here's a guy who's not afraid to speak his mind. @AdamS is always vocal about his opinion on league-related issues, which obviously has put him at odds with some people. Gives him an easy spot on this list.
The other half of the squad of Adams is @adam2552, who is known for being the greatest detective that this league has ever seen. Why is he in this competition then? Well, it's because people thought he was crazy for a couple of months. This was due to his belief that @ErMurazor was running a multi-account ring. His outlandish theories proved true, and ended up saving this league from dissolving. Nevertheless, he was once controversial, which gives him a place in this competition.
@Drizzy is in this competition because he is what I would call a diet version of @Rindiee. I mean, the guy has a picture of depressed Bart Simpson at his photo on the forums. That alone is enough to get him on this list. Aside from that, he gets the nod because earlier today he made fun of me for being a Jets fan, despite the fact that he roots for the Giants. He is also known for being @jeffie43's father, and was able to Easily controversial.
@NicholasTheGreat is in this competition due to the fact that he enjoys eating Vegemite. In addition to this, he is also known for having allegedly plagiarized a PT once. When asked to describe himself, he stated:
This is enough to get him in this competition.
@Archon is on this list for being the OG troll. He's a person that many consider to be a legend, but is also hated by a bunch of others, mostly those who fell victim to his bait. An easy choice for this competition indeed.
@speculadora is on this list for winning too much. The cunning and innovative sim strategies that he employed as GM of the Otters were a subject of much controversy as he blazed his way to 5 championship victories, angering many users in the process. Some still harbor that hatred today, and it's why he gets a spot on this list. His render is Jose Mourinho because they're both known as very successful executives in the real and simulation sports worlds.
@`Jackets28`, aka Starclown, is what you get when you take @caltroit_red_flames' obsession with Offensive Linemen and apply it to Georgia Tech Football and anime instead. When asked about his decisions as the GM of the Kansas City Coyotes, he had this to say:
This gives him an easy spot in this competition.
@SabaDonutMan is in this competition for various reasons. They are as follows:
- He is in the Portland Pythons war room.
- He is a friend of @Buttersqauch101.
- He is a founder of the Kangaroo Kickboxing Gym in the CFU, which is by far the worst gym in the entire league. Apex MMA is much better.
- His player name sucks.
All of these reasons make it clear as to why his inclusion in this competition was a no-brainer.
@ADwyer87 is the NSFL equivalent of Martin Shkreli. Why is that? This lunatic thinks that hot dogs are sandwiches. Now, you probably think that alone is pretty crazy, but it gets worse. He thinks that the Lego Movie was a good movie, and has also reportedly claimed that Cyndaquil is a better Generation 2 starter than Totodile. Not only are his opinions wrong, but he is also crazy. He VOLUNTARILY chose to be commissioner of this league. His insanity continues to amaze me. Including him here was an easy decision.
ghmorello#6736 has never said a word on the forums or in any league-related Discords, but their negative reputation in this league is endless. According to several people who have interacted with this user in the past, they are a pedophile, have doxxed people before, and are overall just a very toxic and harmful user in general. Not only that, but I was running out of ideas, so it was a no-brainer to put this person in the competition.
@Trickiefella1 is the GOAT (depending on who you talk to). 'Nuff said.
@Daybe isn't as controversial as some of the other users in this post, but essentially is a diet @Rindiee as well. I've also seen him featured in a couple of punishment threads as well, making it a fair enough inclusion in this competition as I was running out of ideas. who
Now that you've met the contestants, it's on to the competition.
And right off the bat, Asipi decides to make things interesting by murdering Finn where he stands. This is gonna be a good one.
Hefty Lefty quickly dispatches the GOAT to gets things started. It's that Offensive Lineman strength, man. I guess someone should give him a fair rub. Now that I think about it, I guess I want one too.
This is surprisingly accurate and mirrors real-life events. THe funny thing is that they were on the same team too. Friendly fire right off the bat.
And in a shocking twist of fate, Starboy redeems himself. Good riddance.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Xt1kUK71lc
And, after an eventful Bloodbath, we're on to Day 1.
A very questionable decision to be merciful by Drizzy. We'll see if this backfires.
Down goes slm, at the hands of the gorilla king. Sad!
Jeff continues to tamper Despacito from beyond the grave. Another punishment thread is a necessity.
The Adams pair up with Asipi, spec, and Gucci. Let's see what these boys can do.
Starclown can't even succeed at assisted suicide. This is an embarrassment to the entire Coyotes organization.
Now that Day 1 is over, let's take a look at our fallen contestants.
Rest in... something.
On to Night 1!
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And in a cruel twist of fate, AirCrou is murdered in cold blood by Starclown, after just having spared his life. What a disgusting act.
And down goes Bex. Or does she?
Jeff continues to influence the game from beyond the grave, choosing to haunt HO for killing him during The Bloodbath. He should be fined.
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@jeffie43 this is getting out of hand. Stop tampering Garfield.
Night 1 was pretty eventful, I'd say. Now, we're on to Day 2.
Dwyer continues to corrupt others with his bad opinions. The only good outcome of this is that Jeff can't tamper Despacito anymore.
HO is able to defeat speculadora in a fight, ending the Death Otters' reign of terror. No more gaming the sim for this guy. Hopefully.
And that's it for Day 2. Let's take a look at our fallen tributes.
With that, we're on to Night 2.
These guys are turning into cavemen.
And down goes Goodman, at the hands of Dwyer. Globo Gym will sadly never beat out the Average Joes.
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Night 2 is over, and now it's time for Day 3. Let's see what happens.
Yet another boneheaded move from Net. No surprises here.
Spec had a chance to finish HO off once and for all, but refused to take it. Coward.
Day 3 is over, so let's take a look at those who have fallen.
On to Night 3.
Daybe seems to be taking a very unorthodox approach to this competition. We'll see if it pays off for him.
I guess it was more than just words this time. Wow.
That's it for Night 3, on to Day 4.
What a way to go out. Looks like Head Office is gonna do their best to stay in this one, as the throw spec to the wolves (daybe).
Probably left the old one with Archon.
Day 4 is over. Here are the fallen.
We're on to Night 4, with just 10 tributes remaining.
This is a victory for society.
The Adams hoped to go out together, but one was kept alive. Meanwhile, Net passes out after having completed the excruciating tasks of failing to start a fire, and killing the wrong person by accident.
On to The Feast.
Net has done it again. He has killed the wrong person by accident for a second time. This is unbelievable.
Looks like Vorsh is very determined to win this competition. Wow.
On to Day 5.
The only eventful thing to happen.
That's it for Day 5. Let's take a look at the fallen.
5 tributes remain.
Here comes Night 5.
I don't understand this at all. These 4 have to kill each other but are choosing to joke around while being aware that they're 4 of the last 5 tributes left. Not to mention that I think Net tried to kill one of these guys literally the day before this. Or, they could be conspiring against HO, the only tribute not included here. Let's see what they're doing.
Ah. Having nightmares once again.
That's it for Night 5, on to Day 6.
Despite Net having previously attempted to kill Daybe, they're completely fine with teaming up. Right.
And there it is, folks. HO is no more.
Now that Day 6 is over, let's take a look at the fallen.
Just HO this time, folks. 4 tributes left, with 2 of them being from the same District. Let's see what happens.
On to Night 6.
Nothing. Guess these guys are just happy that HO is dead.
That's it for Night 6. On to Day 7.
And down goes Daybe.
Let's take a look at the fallen.
And then there were three. On to Night 7.
Nothing at all. There's nothing to do, now that HO is dead.
On to Day 8.
There it is. Dwyer is no more. Looks like District 2 has won this one...
Let's take a look at the only person to fall on Day 8.
As for Night 8. Will they fight? Or will this end up like the actual Hunger Games? We'll see.
There it is. Net is no more. How he managed to survive for this long, I'll never know. But it looks like @Vorshayla gets this one.
Well folks, it turns out that words do indeed have power. Especially inflammatory ones. Vorsh has won the game.
Here's the season summary.
Not only did Vorsh win, but he led all tributes with 7 kills. Must've updated a lot to get there.
That's all for me today, as I'm pretty pooped after writing this whole thing up, and I'm not really interested in stretching my word count any further. If you want to run your own simulation using this season, the link you can use to access it is here. Hope you enjoyed.
Code:
3097 words.