*Gibson's Story

**37thchamber** · 08-22-2017, 04:34 PM

Since some people won't let this go, I felt the need to tell the story in a way that adequately frames the issues in moral terms.

Flying Thunder presents: "Gibson's Story"

(I really shouldn't have to explain this, but I know some of y'all are mad young, so... in case you didn't know, this is a parody of the Slick Rick classic; Children's Story)

[Intro]
Uncle Antoine, could you read us a bedtime story?
Please, huh, please?
Alright, you kids get to bed, I'll get the storybook

Y'all tucked in?
Yeah!
Heeeere we go

Once upon a time not long ago
When people wore pajamas and lived life slow
When leagues were stern and justice stood
And players were behavin' like they ought ta good
There lived a college grad who was misled
By pharmaceutical reps and this is what they said:
"Listen up kid, and you can pad your stats,
Blockin' at the line and then makin' the catch"
They gave him drugs, glory came with ease
But homie couldn't stop, it's like he had a disease
He popped another and another, pancaked dudes like they was nothin'
Then he caught the interest of a journo, undercover
The journo smelled a fish, and started analyzin'
He said "Holy shit, these numbers are surprizin'!"
He started counting up, and he did the math
A hundred ten doses was the count that he had
Rolled up on our grad and said "Are you on TPE?"
The grad was silent, but his eyes were shifty
The journo got pushy and the grad stayed quiet
Thinking "This comes out, the whole league will riot"
So he cold dashed and went into hiding
Article released, tempers were rising
The grad stayed silent, let them investigate him
Looked on stoically and ignored all the baiting
All the furore around his team, all these accusations
The issue reached the top of this sim league nation
But dude was in the wind, might as well be dead
Didn't make a peep, nor sound, not even a breath
His GM made statements and swore his innocence
His teammates too, one and all they figured that
His elevated performance was just unexplained
The universe is mysterious what more could they say?
But players in the league were not impressed
And argued his team had more but now should have less
They said "They were cheating! That's not right!"
Couldn't help but feel some of the claims were spite
Head office disagreed and cleared his team
The grad was gonna come back, it had all been a dream
But then he heard word, still in trouble he was
Crashed back to Earth, lost all his buzz
Career was alive but his rep was in tatters
Released from his team, now the dream was shattered
Ran out of T weeks ago, still had a habit
Stormed a pharmacy, and aggressively demanded
Had the owner by the coat, said he was gonna be the GOAT
He told the staff "Bring TPE or homie here's toast"
Deep in his heart he knew he was wrong
So he let the owner go and he starts to run on
It was all so strange, not what he'd intended
Then he got the call to say he was suspended
He dropped his cell, so went the glory
And this is the way I have to end this story
He was only twenty-three, in a madman's dream
The league ruined kid, I still hear him scream
This ain't funny so don't ya dare laugh
Just another case about the wrong path
Straight 'n narrow or yo' soul gets cast
Good night

[Outro]
1: Oh boy, that Uncle Antoine is really weird
2: I know right what does he mean by
“Straight ‘n narrow or yo’ soul gets cast"
1: I don’t know, I think he be crackin' up or something
2: Well, good night
1: Good night

(652 words)

* made a few minor edits since the original post but the word count should still be correct