03-31-2024, 06:21 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-03-2024, 12:06 PM by wetwilleh. Edited 1 time in total.)
The DSFL season is about to begin and that means it’s time for extremely early DSFL awards predictions. Even with the erratic nature of the DSFL I can confirm that these are the most accurate predictions. We’ll start with the nominations and then the winner
Most Valuable Player
Puddles O’Duck - QB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 58.6% comp, 3976 yards 38 TDs 12 INTs 88.6 rating
The reigning OPOY and OROY had to be nominated for MVP. While he lost star WR Pitter Patter to the Fire Salamanders, he still has reigning MVP WR Andre Benn, star TE Bob Kronkowski and rookie WR Lawrence Crawford to throw to. With the callup up of star RB Corey Trevor, Tijuana only have sophomore RB Brandon Johnson, which for a team that loves their RB committees means that they’ll probably run the ball less. That will mean more volume for O’Duck but also less efficiency.
Bugs - QB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 57.4% comp, 2872 yards 23 TDs 10 INTs 86.5 rating; 702 yards 6 TDs, 4 fumbles
Bugs had an amazing rookie season with amazing passing and rushing numbers. As a mobile QB who lost a few weapons I can’t see the efficiency keeping up. With the drafting of 2 RBs BBB will have a potent rushing offense and I expect Bugs to be a big part of it. I just can’t see Bugs putting up great passing stats again
Brandon Johnson - RB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 1485 yards 14 TDs, 4.6 avg, 172 receiving yards 1 TD
The Luchadores love running the ball and Johnson is in the perfect spot to take advantage. He’s the sole RB in the border city and has already shown that he can run efficiently, add volume and you have a monster year on your hands.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 142 receiving yards
The rookie running back is the lead RB in KCCs offense which doesn’t have an established receiving target and has a mobile QB. They will be running the ball a ton and McQueen will get his chances to show off his speed. Ka-Chow
Chopper Donquixote - WR - LON; Predicted Stats: 91 receptions, 1454 yards 8 TDs
Donquixote comes into this season as one of the most experienced players in the league. Chopper doesn't have much competition for targets, with his main one actually being rookie RB Zigzag Zigstep. He already has an established connection with veteran QB Scudl McDiddl which will pay off big time here
Andre Benn - WR - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 94 receptions, 1634 yards 14 TDs
Benn is the reigning MVP, he has the same QB, and his WR partner Pitter Patter got called up. He's gonna get more volume and put up the same if not better numbers
Dunkler Sowerwine - DT - MIN; Predicted Stats: 34 tackles 7 TFLs 4 FFs 11 sacks
Minnesota has a very strong defense which comes to Dunlker’s benefit this season. He’ll have all day to get to the Quarterback and won't have to deal with double teams. I could see a rare generational DT season from Dunkler this year
Huge Yakman - LB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 13 TFLs 4 FFs 10 sacks
Hold your grandmas because Yakmans gonna show up in a big way. Dallas has a disheveled defense giving Yakman the opportunities he needs to get to the Quarterback. He's already shown his skills at forcing fumbles and getting into the backfield, I think he can put it together this season.
Speed Hawk - LB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 108 tackles 12 TFLs 2 FFs 13 sacks 1 INT 8 PDs
Hawk had an amazing rookie campaign, showing great pass defending and pass rushing abilities. Bondi has a very good defense who Hawk will lead with this great season
Terry Keller - CB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 78 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 27 PDs 1 TD
The Coyotes have a very strong secondary, and the most experienced player on that defense is Keller. He’ll play CB1 and with the Coyotes defense terrorizing opposing offenses Keller will feast this year.
Lasse Zeigler. - S - MIN; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 1 blocked FG
Zeigler has already shown he can do it all with a successful transition from Quarterback to Safety last season. He’s going to have to step up to lead a young Norfolk defense if they want any success. It's a tradition for a safety to have a great season.
Wynn Jenkins K/P - BBB; Predicted Stats; 39/40 XP, 25/29 FG, 5/7 FG 40-49, 3/4 FG 50+, long 57, 48.1 punting avg, 26 inside 20, 68 long
A kicker always has to make the ballot and it’s clear that Jenkins is the best one this season. He’s shown great punting and kicking abilities in his career so far and is currently one of the best players on the Buccaneers
Results
8) Everyone Else
7) Donquixote, WR, LON
6) Hawk, LB, BBB
5) Bugs, QB, BBB
4) Zeigler, S, NOR
3) O’Duck, QB, TIJ
2) Andre Benn, WR, TIJ
1) Brandon Johnson, RB, TIJ
Of course TIjuana dominance remains. I think Benn deserves it this year but the voters don't want to give it to him again and give it to Johnson instead. Vote fatigue is a real thing
Offensive Player of the Year
Brandon Johnson - RB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 1485 yards 14 TDs, 4.4 avg, 102 receiving yards
Puddles O’ Duck - QB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 58.6% comp, 3976 yards 38 TDs 12 INTs 88.6 rating
O’Duck has a great season in my hypothetical that could easily win him an award. I think his efficiency goes down but not by too much but increased volume also means bigger stats.
Bugs - QB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 57.4% comp, 2872 yards 23 TDs 10 INTs 86.5 rating; 702 yards 6 TDs, 4 fumbles
Mobile QB + Volume = great stats, but that already happened for bugs last season. I predict a downtick in efficiency and an increase in turnovers. Bondi don't have a strong offense surrounding Bugs so that could mean great volume for a possible MVP run from Bugs.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 312 receiving yards 3 TDs
Although McQueen is a rookie, there’s a path to OPOY for him. It’s common knowledge that rookie RBs can produce, a rookie RB won MVP 2 seasons ago, and McQueen is in a perfect situation. He’s the Coyotes only RB in a system that will surely run the ball a ton with a mobile QB and a receiving core full of rookies
Soul King Brook - RB - MIN; Predicted Stats: 992 yards 5.1 avg 13 TDs, 187 receiving yards
Soul King Brook had a very efficient rookie season but didn’t have great volume with receiving back Willie Swaggert taking 150 carries. He’ll presumably get more this year as Minnesota leans on their running game with a rookie QB. However, Dominic Reynolds is switching to RB to presumably fill Swaggerts role which limits the amount of volume King Brook can get. He’ll be efficient but the volume won't be there for him
Andre Benn - WR - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 94 receptions, 1634 yards 11 TDs
Benn is set up for another elite season, his only competition for targets are a tight end and rookie receivers in an elite offense with an elite Quarterback. Nothing more to say
Chopper Donquixote - WR - LON; Predicted Stats: 91 receptions, 1454 yards 8 TDs
Same thing as Benn except he wasn’t as good last season. McDiddl has shown that he likes to throw to fellow receiver Hollywood Tez but Chopper is the better player. Past Tez, McDiddl’s only targets are a blocking tight end and running backs meaning Donquixote will be able to feast this year
Jonathan Irons - WR - POR; Predicted Stats: 92 receptions 1332 yards 4 TDs
With Portland’s top target Brad Woof leaving for Hawaii, Irons finds a situation where the only competition for targets are tight ends and running backs. Van Goff can throw the ball well when supported by a good running game and he will be this season with the additions of two rookie running backs. Irons will get a healthy share of targets and assuredly do something with them.
Gustav Farkas - OL - DAL; Predicted Stats; 63 pancakes, 1 sack allowed
O lineman for shits and giggles. (Can I say shits? Hopefully cause I just said shits three times).
Results
6) Everyone Else
5) King Brook, RB, MIN
4) Donqixoute, WR, LON
3) O’Duck, QB, TIJ
2) Bugs, QB, BBB
1) Andre Benn, WR, TIJ
Benn rightfully wins an award as there's no way to justify anyone beating him out here. Bugs probably gets a few votes from the mobile QB lovers putting him slightly above O’Duck, while everyone else is a tier below
Defensive Player of the Year
Dunkler Sowerwine - DT - MIN; Predicted Stats: 34 tackles 7 TFLs 4 FFs 11 sacks
I mean he’s a DT he’s not gonna win tbh, I love Dunkler but this statline is a stretch and it still isn’t good enough for an award
Huge Yakman - LB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 13 TFLs 4 FFs 10 sacks 2 PDs
Now linebacker is where its at. Hardman had a great rookie season and he’ll be heavily relied on with the Birddogs have a terrible secondary. Any production from Dallas’ defense is going to come from the linebacker duo and I trust Yakman to perform.
Speed Hawk - LB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 108 tackles 12 TFLs 2 FFs 13 sacks 1 INT 8 PDs
Idk what to say again, Hawk good, linebacker good
Grzegorz Winnicki - LB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 104 tackles 9 TFLs 3 FFs 7 sacks 4 PDs
Winnicki also had a great rookie campaign and the Luchadores will lean on him defensively. He’s gonna be a top LB in the league on a defense who will feast
Willeh Strong - LB - POR; 89 tackles 11 TFLs 6 FFs 11 sacks 3 PDs
Is he really strong? No, he's Willeh Strong. Willeh was the first overall pick for a reason, I can assure everyone that he will be the top rookie linebacker in this class. Portland linebackers have always done well and putting this speedy, strong behemoth of a man at LB just isn't fair
Terry Keller - CB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 78 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 27 PDs
Keller is an experienced player who will be the leader of the strong KCC defense and is coming off a great season
Mooty Poop-Eater - CB - LON; Predicted Stats: 81 tackles 1 FF 4 INTs 26 PDs
You can’t be poop if you eat poop. He’s the only cornerback on the squad and he obviously won't be poop. Poop-Eater will make some plays for London and catch some balls
Lasse Zeigler - S - NOR; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 1 blocked FG
Big players show up in big games, and Zeigler is that guy, I trust that he’ll make a ton of plays for Norfolk and continue the legacy of Dewey Greenbeans on a completely different team. Zeigler will make make himself seen across the whole field, causing nightmares in Quarterbacks and receivers alike
Results
7) Everyone else
6) Keller, CB, KCC
5) Yakman, LB, DAL
4) Sowerwine, DT, MIN
3) Strong, LB, POR
2) Lasse Zeigler, S, NOR
1) Speed Hawk, LB, BBB
I think Hawk speeds his way to a DPOY here, it’ll be close between him and Zeigler, but Hawk takes the cake by runoff voting.
Offensive Rookie of the Year
Greg Hirsch - QB - MIN; Predicted Stats: 2401 yards 17 TDs 7 INTs 82.4 rating; 621 yards 8 TDs 2 fumbles
Hirsch is in the perfect position for a rookie QB. he has run game support with 2nd year running backs Soul King Brook and Dominic Reynolds, and 3rd year RB Maeve Mascarpone. He has maxed wide receiver Julian Rose to throw too and Squints Jr. and Hex Waters as well. Fordhammer is a well established user who will definitely earn consistently throughout the season.
Jamarcus Qiller - QB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 3561 yards 24 TDs 14 INTs 74.3 rating
Qiller doesn’t have the great supporting cast that Hirch does, but it's good enough for him to succeed. The Birddogs have good run support and a good offensive line. Youngbuck has been around for a while but has been inconsistent earning wise and has retired a lot of players early. I think he’ll stick with this one and be a gunslinger, the next Turndaballova.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 312 receiving yards 3 TDs
I’ve talked about McQueen a lot in this article already, he’s in a perfect situation and his user, SPatt59, has been finding his footing in the league. With at least solid earning, McQueen will thrive in the Kansas City offense.
Nathan Claflin Jr. - RB - NOR; Predicted Stats: 827 yards 5.1 avg 7 TDs, 124 receiving yards 1 TD
Norfolk has the ingredients for a high volume rushing game with a mobile QB and a week group of receivers. Veteran Worsethan Blaze will probably continue taking a little less than half of the carries in Norfolk, but the fullback cant compete with a RB in terms of efficiency and therefore won’t take too much of the volume. I trust greenbaynathan to continue earning and get Claflin high in TPE by the end of this season
Zigzag Zipstep - RB - LON; Predicted Stats: 615 yards 4.0 avg 6 TDs, 486 yards 5 TDs
Twentysix is a very beloved member of the ISFL whose last player was a legendary CB. Zigstep will be behind Lane Wilson on the depth chart but should still get a good amount of volume and goal line work. London also lacks a WR3 which means Zipstep will be forced to step up in the recieving game as well.
Seer Ial - WR - BBB; Predicted Stats: 71 receptions 1265 yards 7 TDs
Bondi has a weak receiving core and Bugs has shown that he can pass as well as run. Last season rookie WR Maria Teresa de la Rosa had an outstanding season with Bondi Beach and I see Seer Ial repeating that success. By the way I deserve credit for this name because of my terrible claim as a seer while I was the serial killer which led to the birthing of the seer ial killer idea in omgs head.
Old Man Walker - WR - DAL; Predicted Stats: 87 receptions 1208 yards 8 TDs
Walker will quickly become the top WR in Dallas and being paired with a rookie Gunslinger means a good amount of volume for him. Deadlunatic is a reliable user who will earn and be the leader of Dallas’ offense for this season
Lawrence Crawford - WR - TIJ; 77 receptions 1104 yards 13 TDs
Swankypants had great success with Tijuana last season, and now on the other side of the ball he could have immense success again. Crawford will be filling the role Pitter Patter had last year, and while he might be a slightly worse player than Patter he’ll still file the role well and get great numbers
Gustav Farkas - OL - DAL; Predicted Stats; 63 pancakes, 1 sack allowed
Offensive line is cool. Farkas will be the left tackle in Dallas and Raven will earn very well
Results
7) Everyone Else
6) Farkas, OL, DAL
5) Zipstep, RB, LON
4) Crawford, WR, TIJ
3) Walker, WR, DAL
2) Jag McQueen, RB, KCC
1) Greg Hirsch, QB, MIN
Hirsch gets an easy win over McQueen with a highly efficient rookie season that will lead Minnesota to the playoffs. A sleeper candidate for the award is Lawrence Crawford who I think will perform very well
Defensive Rookie of the Year
Robot Sunfish - LB - NOR; Predicted Stats: 96 tackles 11 TFLs 2 FFs 11 sacks 6 PDs
As the higher TPE rookie linebacker, Sunfish will probably get the pass rushing job over Mannheim, especially since Sunfish is a pass rusher and Mannheim is a coverage linebacker. Sunfish will get all the opportunities to get after the quarterback. After his showings in the prospect bowl it’s clear he’ll take advantage of his opportunities and get after the quarterback. Yonggarius is a reliable earner who should continue out earning cynical.
Lheorvine Adebisi - DT - KCC; Predicted Stats: 48 tackles 9 TFLs 3 FFs 5 sack
Adebisi gets to be the starting defensive tackle in a potent and heavily underrated Kansas City defense. If there’s anyone who can manage a good rookie season as a DT it’s Alikh. Adebisi should be able to benefit from Kansas City’s strong pass rush to pick up some tackles in the backfield.
Adolin Collins - LB - LON; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 10 TFLs 3 FFs 10 sacks
Collins is the highest TPE linebacker in London, and with a strong pass rush support from Gunner Collins will have opportunities to rush the passer. Infern8 is a highly established user who will 100% earn and perform. Last year Leopold Roy had an outstanding season for London and Collins will be filling the same or at least a similar role for London.
Willeh Strong - LB - POR; Predicted Stats: 89 tackles 9 TFLs 5 FFs 10 sacks 3 PDs
Strength is the most important facet of a player's skills. I’m absolutely not stalling writing about it. Strong showed that he was a great player during preseason and will continue it during the whole season. The best workout you can do to build strength is do push ups while hanging onto the roof. It builds your strength like typical pushups and builds your core as you hang onto the roof
Widdle Warrick - CB - POR; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 2 FFs 4 INTs 17 PDs
Warrick will be the CB2 in Portland, and with how well the bot Zamir Multi-14 did last season, Warrick will perform well. Repgnar is a very established user in the league and will earn well (I hope). Warrick will maybe even become the CB1 by the end of the year
Rex Havoc - DE - LON; Predicted Stats: 19 tackles 1 FF 6 sacks
London has a very strong group of pass rushers, Havoc may not get much playing time, but with how great their pass rushing core is Havoc will surely pick up some sacks. Muddym13 has been earning well and will hopefully continue earning and a good pace which could increase his playing time over the course of the season.
Results
6) Havoc, DE, LON
5) Adebisi, DT, KCC
4) Warrick, CB, POR
3) Collins, LB, LON
2) Willeh Strong, LB, POR
1) Robot Sunfish, LB, NOR
This is a great rookie class for linebackers and it’s tight between them. I see Sunfish taking it by a thin margin over Strong and Collins.
Most Valuable Player
Puddles O’Duck - QB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 58.6% comp, 3976 yards 38 TDs 12 INTs 88.6 rating
The reigning OPOY and OROY had to be nominated for MVP. While he lost star WR Pitter Patter to the Fire Salamanders, he still has reigning MVP WR Andre Benn, star TE Bob Kronkowski and rookie WR Lawrence Crawford to throw to. With the callup up of star RB Corey Trevor, Tijuana only have sophomore RB Brandon Johnson, which for a team that loves their RB committees means that they’ll probably run the ball less. That will mean more volume for O’Duck but also less efficiency.
Bugs - QB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 57.4% comp, 2872 yards 23 TDs 10 INTs 86.5 rating; 702 yards 6 TDs, 4 fumbles
Bugs had an amazing rookie season with amazing passing and rushing numbers. As a mobile QB who lost a few weapons I can’t see the efficiency keeping up. With the drafting of 2 RBs BBB will have a potent rushing offense and I expect Bugs to be a big part of it. I just can’t see Bugs putting up great passing stats again
Brandon Johnson - RB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 1485 yards 14 TDs, 4.6 avg, 172 receiving yards 1 TD
The Luchadores love running the ball and Johnson is in the perfect spot to take advantage. He’s the sole RB in the border city and has already shown that he can run efficiently, add volume and you have a monster year on your hands.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 142 receiving yards
The rookie running back is the lead RB in KCCs offense which doesn’t have an established receiving target and has a mobile QB. They will be running the ball a ton and McQueen will get his chances to show off his speed. Ka-Chow
Chopper Donquixote - WR - LON; Predicted Stats: 91 receptions, 1454 yards 8 TDs
Donquixote comes into this season as one of the most experienced players in the league. Chopper doesn't have much competition for targets, with his main one actually being rookie RB Zigzag Zigstep. He already has an established connection with veteran QB Scudl McDiddl which will pay off big time here
Andre Benn - WR - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 94 receptions, 1634 yards 14 TDs
Benn is the reigning MVP, he has the same QB, and his WR partner Pitter Patter got called up. He's gonna get more volume and put up the same if not better numbers
Dunkler Sowerwine - DT - MIN; Predicted Stats: 34 tackles 7 TFLs 4 FFs 11 sacks
Minnesota has a very strong defense which comes to Dunlker’s benefit this season. He’ll have all day to get to the Quarterback and won't have to deal with double teams. I could see a rare generational DT season from Dunkler this year
Huge Yakman - LB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 13 TFLs 4 FFs 10 sacks
Hold your grandmas because Yakmans gonna show up in a big way. Dallas has a disheveled defense giving Yakman the opportunities he needs to get to the Quarterback. He's already shown his skills at forcing fumbles and getting into the backfield, I think he can put it together this season.
Speed Hawk - LB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 108 tackles 12 TFLs 2 FFs 13 sacks 1 INT 8 PDs
Hawk had an amazing rookie campaign, showing great pass defending and pass rushing abilities. Bondi has a very good defense who Hawk will lead with this great season
Terry Keller - CB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 78 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 27 PDs 1 TD
The Coyotes have a very strong secondary, and the most experienced player on that defense is Keller. He’ll play CB1 and with the Coyotes defense terrorizing opposing offenses Keller will feast this year.
Lasse Zeigler. - S - MIN; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 1 blocked FG
Zeigler has already shown he can do it all with a successful transition from Quarterback to Safety last season. He’s going to have to step up to lead a young Norfolk defense if they want any success. It's a tradition for a safety to have a great season.
Wynn Jenkins K/P - BBB; Predicted Stats; 39/40 XP, 25/29 FG, 5/7 FG 40-49, 3/4 FG 50+, long 57, 48.1 punting avg, 26 inside 20, 68 long
A kicker always has to make the ballot and it’s clear that Jenkins is the best one this season. He’s shown great punting and kicking abilities in his career so far and is currently one of the best players on the Buccaneers
Results
8) Everyone Else
7) Donquixote, WR, LON
6) Hawk, LB, BBB
5) Bugs, QB, BBB
4) Zeigler, S, NOR
3) O’Duck, QB, TIJ
2) Andre Benn, WR, TIJ
1) Brandon Johnson, RB, TIJ
Of course TIjuana dominance remains. I think Benn deserves it this year but the voters don't want to give it to him again and give it to Johnson instead. Vote fatigue is a real thing
Offensive Player of the Year
Brandon Johnson - RB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 1485 yards 14 TDs, 4.4 avg, 102 receiving yards
Puddles O’ Duck - QB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 58.6% comp, 3976 yards 38 TDs 12 INTs 88.6 rating
O’Duck has a great season in my hypothetical that could easily win him an award. I think his efficiency goes down but not by too much but increased volume also means bigger stats.
Bugs - QB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 57.4% comp, 2872 yards 23 TDs 10 INTs 86.5 rating; 702 yards 6 TDs, 4 fumbles
Mobile QB + Volume = great stats, but that already happened for bugs last season. I predict a downtick in efficiency and an increase in turnovers. Bondi don't have a strong offense surrounding Bugs so that could mean great volume for a possible MVP run from Bugs.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 312 receiving yards 3 TDs
Although McQueen is a rookie, there’s a path to OPOY for him. It’s common knowledge that rookie RBs can produce, a rookie RB won MVP 2 seasons ago, and McQueen is in a perfect situation. He’s the Coyotes only RB in a system that will surely run the ball a ton with a mobile QB and a receiving core full of rookies
Soul King Brook - RB - MIN; Predicted Stats: 992 yards 5.1 avg 13 TDs, 187 receiving yards
Soul King Brook had a very efficient rookie season but didn’t have great volume with receiving back Willie Swaggert taking 150 carries. He’ll presumably get more this year as Minnesota leans on their running game with a rookie QB. However, Dominic Reynolds is switching to RB to presumably fill Swaggerts role which limits the amount of volume King Brook can get. He’ll be efficient but the volume won't be there for him
Andre Benn - WR - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 94 receptions, 1634 yards 11 TDs
Benn is set up for another elite season, his only competition for targets are a tight end and rookie receivers in an elite offense with an elite Quarterback. Nothing more to say
Chopper Donquixote - WR - LON; Predicted Stats: 91 receptions, 1454 yards 8 TDs
Same thing as Benn except he wasn’t as good last season. McDiddl has shown that he likes to throw to fellow receiver Hollywood Tez but Chopper is the better player. Past Tez, McDiddl’s only targets are a blocking tight end and running backs meaning Donquixote will be able to feast this year
Jonathan Irons - WR - POR; Predicted Stats: 92 receptions 1332 yards 4 TDs
With Portland’s top target Brad Woof leaving for Hawaii, Irons finds a situation where the only competition for targets are tight ends and running backs. Van Goff can throw the ball well when supported by a good running game and he will be this season with the additions of two rookie running backs. Irons will get a healthy share of targets and assuredly do something with them.
Gustav Farkas - OL - DAL; Predicted Stats; 63 pancakes, 1 sack allowed
O lineman for shits and giggles. (Can I say shits? Hopefully cause I just said shits three times).
Results
6) Everyone Else
5) King Brook, RB, MIN
4) Donqixoute, WR, LON
3) O’Duck, QB, TIJ
2) Bugs, QB, BBB
1) Andre Benn, WR, TIJ
Benn rightfully wins an award as there's no way to justify anyone beating him out here. Bugs probably gets a few votes from the mobile QB lovers putting him slightly above O’Duck, while everyone else is a tier below
Defensive Player of the Year
Dunkler Sowerwine - DT - MIN; Predicted Stats: 34 tackles 7 TFLs 4 FFs 11 sacks
I mean he’s a DT he’s not gonna win tbh, I love Dunkler but this statline is a stretch and it still isn’t good enough for an award
Huge Yakman - LB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 13 TFLs 4 FFs 10 sacks 2 PDs
Now linebacker is where its at. Hardman had a great rookie season and he’ll be heavily relied on with the Birddogs have a terrible secondary. Any production from Dallas’ defense is going to come from the linebacker duo and I trust Yakman to perform.
Speed Hawk - LB - BBB; Predicted Stats: 108 tackles 12 TFLs 2 FFs 13 sacks 1 INT 8 PDs
Idk what to say again, Hawk good, linebacker good
Grzegorz Winnicki - LB - TIJ; Predicted Stats: 104 tackles 9 TFLs 3 FFs 7 sacks 4 PDs
Winnicki also had a great rookie campaign and the Luchadores will lean on him defensively. He’s gonna be a top LB in the league on a defense who will feast
Willeh Strong - LB - POR; 89 tackles 11 TFLs 6 FFs 11 sacks 3 PDs
Is he really strong? No, he's Willeh Strong. Willeh was the first overall pick for a reason, I can assure everyone that he will be the top rookie linebacker in this class. Portland linebackers have always done well and putting this speedy, strong behemoth of a man at LB just isn't fair
Terry Keller - CB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 78 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 27 PDs
Keller is an experienced player who will be the leader of the strong KCC defense and is coming off a great season
Mooty Poop-Eater - CB - LON; Predicted Stats: 81 tackles 1 FF 4 INTs 26 PDs
You can’t be poop if you eat poop. He’s the only cornerback on the squad and he obviously won't be poop. Poop-Eater will make some plays for London and catch some balls
Lasse Zeigler - S - NOR; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 5 FFs 4 INTs 1 blocked FG
Big players show up in big games, and Zeigler is that guy, I trust that he’ll make a ton of plays for Norfolk and continue the legacy of Dewey Greenbeans on a completely different team. Zeigler will make make himself seen across the whole field, causing nightmares in Quarterbacks and receivers alike
Results
7) Everyone else
6) Keller, CB, KCC
5) Yakman, LB, DAL
4) Sowerwine, DT, MIN
3) Strong, LB, POR
2) Lasse Zeigler, S, NOR
1) Speed Hawk, LB, BBB
I think Hawk speeds his way to a DPOY here, it’ll be close between him and Zeigler, but Hawk takes the cake by runoff voting.
Offensive Rookie of the Year
Greg Hirsch - QB - MIN; Predicted Stats: 2401 yards 17 TDs 7 INTs 82.4 rating; 621 yards 8 TDs 2 fumbles
Hirsch is in the perfect position for a rookie QB. he has run game support with 2nd year running backs Soul King Brook and Dominic Reynolds, and 3rd year RB Maeve Mascarpone. He has maxed wide receiver Julian Rose to throw too and Squints Jr. and Hex Waters as well. Fordhammer is a well established user who will definitely earn consistently throughout the season.
Jamarcus Qiller - QB - DAL; Predicted Stats: 3561 yards 24 TDs 14 INTs 74.3 rating
Qiller doesn’t have the great supporting cast that Hirch does, but it's good enough for him to succeed. The Birddogs have good run support and a good offensive line. Youngbuck has been around for a while but has been inconsistent earning wise and has retired a lot of players early. I think he’ll stick with this one and be a gunslinger, the next Turndaballova.
Jag McQueen - RB - KCC; Predicted Stats: 1121 yards 4.7 avg 9 TDs, 312 receiving yards 3 TDs
I’ve talked about McQueen a lot in this article already, he’s in a perfect situation and his user, SPatt59, has been finding his footing in the league. With at least solid earning, McQueen will thrive in the Kansas City offense.
Nathan Claflin Jr. - RB - NOR; Predicted Stats: 827 yards 5.1 avg 7 TDs, 124 receiving yards 1 TD
Norfolk has the ingredients for a high volume rushing game with a mobile QB and a week group of receivers. Veteran Worsethan Blaze will probably continue taking a little less than half of the carries in Norfolk, but the fullback cant compete with a RB in terms of efficiency and therefore won’t take too much of the volume. I trust greenbaynathan to continue earning and get Claflin high in TPE by the end of this season
Zigzag Zipstep - RB - LON; Predicted Stats: 615 yards 4.0 avg 6 TDs, 486 yards 5 TDs
Twentysix is a very beloved member of the ISFL whose last player was a legendary CB. Zigstep will be behind Lane Wilson on the depth chart but should still get a good amount of volume and goal line work. London also lacks a WR3 which means Zipstep will be forced to step up in the recieving game as well.
Seer Ial - WR - BBB; Predicted Stats: 71 receptions 1265 yards 7 TDs
Bondi has a weak receiving core and Bugs has shown that he can pass as well as run. Last season rookie WR Maria Teresa de la Rosa had an outstanding season with Bondi Beach and I see Seer Ial repeating that success. By the way I deserve credit for this name because of my terrible claim as a seer while I was the serial killer which led to the birthing of the seer ial killer idea in omgs head.
Old Man Walker - WR - DAL; Predicted Stats: 87 receptions 1208 yards 8 TDs
Walker will quickly become the top WR in Dallas and being paired with a rookie Gunslinger means a good amount of volume for him. Deadlunatic is a reliable user who will earn and be the leader of Dallas’ offense for this season
Lawrence Crawford - WR - TIJ; 77 receptions 1104 yards 13 TDs
Swankypants had great success with Tijuana last season, and now on the other side of the ball he could have immense success again. Crawford will be filling the role Pitter Patter had last year, and while he might be a slightly worse player than Patter he’ll still file the role well and get great numbers
Gustav Farkas - OL - DAL; Predicted Stats; 63 pancakes, 1 sack allowed
Offensive line is cool. Farkas will be the left tackle in Dallas and Raven will earn very well
Results
7) Everyone Else
6) Farkas, OL, DAL
5) Zipstep, RB, LON
4) Crawford, WR, TIJ
3) Walker, WR, DAL
2) Jag McQueen, RB, KCC
1) Greg Hirsch, QB, MIN
Hirsch gets an easy win over McQueen with a highly efficient rookie season that will lead Minnesota to the playoffs. A sleeper candidate for the award is Lawrence Crawford who I think will perform very well
Defensive Rookie of the Year
Robot Sunfish - LB - NOR; Predicted Stats: 96 tackles 11 TFLs 2 FFs 11 sacks 6 PDs
As the higher TPE rookie linebacker, Sunfish will probably get the pass rushing job over Mannheim, especially since Sunfish is a pass rusher and Mannheim is a coverage linebacker. Sunfish will get all the opportunities to get after the quarterback. After his showings in the prospect bowl it’s clear he’ll take advantage of his opportunities and get after the quarterback. Yonggarius is a reliable earner who should continue out earning cynical.
Lheorvine Adebisi - DT - KCC; Predicted Stats: 48 tackles 9 TFLs 3 FFs 5 sack
Adebisi gets to be the starting defensive tackle in a potent and heavily underrated Kansas City defense. If there’s anyone who can manage a good rookie season as a DT it’s Alikh. Adebisi should be able to benefit from Kansas City’s strong pass rush to pick up some tackles in the backfield.
Adolin Collins - LB - LON; Predicted Stats: 103 tackles 10 TFLs 3 FFs 10 sacks
Collins is the highest TPE linebacker in London, and with a strong pass rush support from Gunner Collins will have opportunities to rush the passer. Infern8 is a highly established user who will 100% earn and perform. Last year Leopold Roy had an outstanding season for London and Collins will be filling the same or at least a similar role for London.
Willeh Strong - LB - POR; Predicted Stats: 89 tackles 9 TFLs 5 FFs 10 sacks 3 PDs
Strength is the most important facet of a player's skills. I’m absolutely not stalling writing about it. Strong showed that he was a great player during preseason and will continue it during the whole season. The best workout you can do to build strength is do push ups while hanging onto the roof. It builds your strength like typical pushups and builds your core as you hang onto the roof
Widdle Warrick - CB - POR; Predicted Stats: 73 tackles 2 FFs 4 INTs 17 PDs
Warrick will be the CB2 in Portland, and with how well the bot Zamir Multi-14 did last season, Warrick will perform well. Repgnar is a very established user in the league and will earn well (I hope). Warrick will maybe even become the CB1 by the end of the year
Rex Havoc - DE - LON; Predicted Stats: 19 tackles 1 FF 6 sacks
London has a very strong group of pass rushers, Havoc may not get much playing time, but with how great their pass rushing core is Havoc will surely pick up some sacks. Muddym13 has been earning well and will hopefully continue earning and a good pace which could increase his playing time over the course of the season.
Results
6) Havoc, DE, LON
5) Adebisi, DT, KCC
4) Warrick, CB, POR
3) Collins, LB, LON
2) Willeh Strong, LB, POR
1) Robot Sunfish, LB, NOR
This is a great rookie class for linebackers and it’s tight between them. I see Sunfish taking it by a thin margin over Strong and Collins.