10-24-2024, 08:01 PM
(This post was last modified: 10-25-2024, 10:27 AM by SabaDonutMan. Edited 4 times in total.)
Hello everyone,
Initially, I didn’t plan to create a mock draft, but after coming across so many poorly executed ones, I felt it was necessary to step in and share my insights. It’s important to me that we have a well-informed discussion as we approach the draft. This first-round mock draft is not just a collection of random predictions, it’s based on factual information and careful analysis of current trends and player performances. I believe it accurately reflects what will happen during the draft, considering team needs and potential trades. HO, I'm sorry that I'm leaking the draft before the stream, but I just felt like posting this media is something I had to do. That being said, let us begin with the first overall selection.
Wait actually really quickly before we get started, I need to quickly preface this mock draft by saying the order of picks might be completely off, I just copied it from another mock so if I accidentally placed your team in the wrong spot, sorry about that, just a simple mistake. Anyway, let’s get back to what I was saying. Let us begin with the first overall selection.
With the First Overall Selection, the Orange County Otters select…
The Bondi Beach Buccaneers
The entire Bondi Beach roster should be the consensus first overall pick. Right now, Orange County has a team that is performing nearly as poorly as a DSFL team. To make matters worse, their star wide receiver, Chopper Donquixote, just recently retired and got traded away, and according to Lemonoppy, he accounted for a tenth of the team’s total TPE. With that massive loss, they might actually end up being worse than a DSFL team. With all that being said, the only way to be better than a DSFL team is to take the very best one, and that is the Ultimini-winning Bondi Beach Buccaneers, a team stacked with talent and proven success. While other teams with send-downs on Bondi Beach might complain, drafting the entire Buccaneers roster would give Orange County the boost they desperately need. It might even help them win two whole games this season, though honestly, that seems extremely unlikely.
With the Second Overall Selection, the Colorado Yeti select…
Taonga Kofi from the Colorado Yeti
With this pick, the Yeti are making the obvious selection by taking Taonga Kofi once again. The first overall pick for the Yeti in the season 50 draft has been has shown steady growth and impact on both sides of the ball last season as a send-down and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. From my personal experience, I can say that Midknight is a fantastic user. As a rookie mentor, Midknight has helped me and the other rookies more than a few times and Colorado understands the value that a user like that brings to the team. By picking Kofi once again, they’re not only getting a talented player but also reinforcing their locker room culture with someone who’s proven to be a great influence. Midknight may be disappointed that he fell to the second selection in this draft but he’s sure to make an impact on that Yeti team.
With the Third Overall Selection, the Berlin Fire Salamanders select…
Xander Le Roux from the Dallas Birddogs
This is another homerun selection. The fourth-highest TPE player in this season 51 draft class had an outstanding season for the Birddogs, finishing with 102 tackles, 5 forced fumbles, 4 interceptions, and 33 passes deflected. These impressive stats earned Le Roux a nomination for the DSFL Defensive Player of the Year award. However, beyond such an amazing player lies an amazing user named Zeagle. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of talking to Zeagle, you’re missing out. I still remember spamming the Arizona war room with Zeagle propaganda during the season 25 draft, it got so bad that our general manager at the time, Unicorn, threatened to kick Zamir and me out of the war room. Safe to say that the selection ended up paying dividends. Every team could use a user like Zeagle, making the selection for the Fire Salamanders a simple choice.
With the Fourth Overall Selection, the San Jose Sabercats select…
DarknessRising from the Head Office
Just to clarify, this selection is not the Colorado Yeti linebacker Ferdinand Hyde, that would be cheating. Rather this selection is the commissioner himself DarknessRising. Out of all of the selections in this mock draft, this is the one I’m most surprised other mock drafters didn’t make. This feels like a perfect match. The Sabercats have had a glaring need for a commissioner for as long as I can remember, with their closest solution being Marcella Toriki back in Season 18. Darkness checks all the boxes the Sabercats are looking for in a commissioner: strong influence, consistent activity, and a non-American time zone. I’m sure San Jose is thrilled to have finally found their guy. They can look forward to a new era of success with Darkness at the helm.
With the Fifth Overall Selection, the Baltimore Hawks select…
Benji Raga from the Dallas Birddogs Waiver Squad
The reigning champions are in a position to select the best player available, and in this case, that player is a Season 52 prospect named Benji Raga. As a defensive tackle, he possesses many of the qualities a championship-winning teams look for in a defender. While he may struggle with tackling and lacks a bit of strength, he makes up for it with impressive speed for someone his size. His user is SabaDonutMan, whose first player was Arizona Outlaws legend and Hall of Famer Saba Donut. I’ve only heard positive things about this user, so I’m confident he’ll be a great addition to any team. This pick is the ultimate investment in the Hawks' future as no team has ever made such a future-oriented selection. However, with Raga leading their defensive line, I’m confident they will become perennial Ultimus contenders.
With the Sixth Overall Selection, the Austin Copperheads select…
A TRADE!!!
They will be trading with…
THE TIJUANA LUCHADORES
And with the Sixth Overall Selection, the Tijuana Luchadores select…
Kai Ware from the Tijuana Luchadores
Tijuana management has made the smartest move in the history of the DSFL. Kai Ware is the Luchadores' fifth-highest TPE player and the highest in the Season 51 draft class. As such the possibility of losing him to the ISFL is too much of a risk for Tijuana to take, so they decided to take matters into their own hands. In an unprecedented trade, the Luchadores trade an undisclosed amount of cap space to the Austin Copperheads to make sure that their best player doesn’t get stolen away. On the user side, Hepha is a great user and I’m sure Tijuana leadership will be excited to keep them in the locker room. Overall keeping Kai Ware in Tijuana is the clear solution to their woes, and it puts them in a prime position to contend for the ultimini in season 51.
With the Seventh Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
100 Million ISFL Sim Dollars from the ISFL Bank
This is an excellent selection by the Crash. Instead of taking a big risk by choosing a player, they’ve opted for financial security by selecting 100 million Sim Dollars—a move that showcases both forward-thinking and long-term strategy. With an assumed interest rate of 4.1%, in 10 seasons (roughly the average length of an ISFL player’s career), this investment will grow to $149,453,914.68. That’s nearly 50% growth, giving Cape Town significant financial flexibility to make key moves in the future, whether it’s signing top free agents, retaining key players, or blowing up the team with trades. This decision ensures they stay competitive in both cap management and roster building. It’s a smart, high-quality pick by a team with serious Ultimus aspirations.
With the Eight Overall Selection, the Orange County Otters select…
I honestly don’t know
Yeah, I’m completely out of ideas for what Orange County should do at this point, the team is in such a terrible position. The Otters’ downfall is something I never would have predicted 30 seasons ago. Things are so bad that I’ve placed 3.5 million Sim Dollars on them losing to a DSFL team, and honestly, it doesn’t even feel like a risky bet. That’s how far expectations have dropped. It’s hard to imagine how they’ll turn things around, but right now, it feels like they’re destined for yet another first overall selection, no matter who they select here.
With the Ninth Overall Selection, the Osaka Kaiju select…
Godzilla the King of Monsters
The Kaiju take advantage of Orange County’s indecision and select arguably the world’s most well-known Kaiju, Godzilla. Standing at an impressive 393 feet (120 meters) tall, according to Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019), Godzilla boasts the best physical profile of any prospect in this draft. His sheer size and unmatched strength make him a dominant force at whatever position Osaka wants it to play at. Beyond just his on-field presence, Godzilla’s ability to level cities will come in handy whenever the Kaiju lose an away game. However, I think the most important impact Godzilla will have on the Kaiju is in their merchandise sales. With his global fame and iconic image, Godzilla branded jerseys, action figures, and memorabilia are sure to fly off the shelves, earning the Kaiju millions and millions of sim dollars. The team’s fanbase will likely grow as fast nearly as fast as their revenue, with supporters from around the world flocking to see the King of Monsters in action. The amount of revenue they’ll generate could be enough to fund a small country. A fantastic pick by the Osaka Kaiju, and I’ll be sure to pre-order my Godzilla jersey right away!
With the Tenth Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
Jake from State Farm
Cape Town management is thrilled that their second-rated prospect fell to their second selection. Jake brings unmatched versatility to the table; he can handle everything from insurance claims to calming the nerves of stressed teammates, he truly is a good neighbor. With a name like the “Crash,” having an insurance agent of Jake’s caliber is crucial to their success. Jake’s ability to bundle home and auto insurance will ensure that everyone is well-covered, both on and off the field. His knack for delivering "great coverage" will not only be invaluable to the Crash’s defense but will also help shut down opposing quarterbacks by always being there when the team needs him. Jake is a game-changer, and by guaranteeing the lowest prices possible, Cape Town knows they’ve made a winning pick.
With the Eleventh Overall Selection, the San Jose Sabercats select…
STOLEN BY THE ARIZONA OUTLAWS
You heard me right, the big bad Outlaws have just stolen San Jose’s eleventh selection.
And with the Eleventh Overall Selection, the Arizona Outlaws select…
THE ARIZONA OUTLAWS PASS
In the ultimate sign of disrespect, the villainous Outlaws steal the eleventh overall selection from their greatest historical rival, San Jose (technically it might be Orange County, but they’re so bad that we’ll let them be), only to pass on the selection. In all my time in the ISFL, I’ve never seen such a cold-blooded, vindictive move. Never before has a team stolen another team’s pick just to pass on it, leaving both teams without a player. It’s utterly diabolical, but then again, what else can you expect from the Outlaws? They always find a way to cheat and win and this malicious move just adds another chapter to their legacy of bending the rules to their advantage.
With the Twelfth Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
Abstract Geometry from the Minnesota Grey Ducks
I like Murtsi, so you should like Murtsi too. The player with the second-highest TPE in this Season 51 draft class had an impressive season with the Grey Ducks. He finished the campaign with 81 tackles, including 10 tackles for a loss, 3 forced fumbles, 1 fumble recovery, 13 sacks, 1 interception, 6 pass deflections, and 1 touchdown. He is clearly a future leader of any defense. Additionally, he has an elite player name, and when I say elite, I mean truly elite. Abstract Geometry will come in and immediately be the smartest player in any locker room. However, the best part about this player is his user Murtsi. He created waaaay back in season 18 back when yours truly was still around. Now it’s almost impossible for me to explain what went on in rookie during that season but if you are curious make sure to check some of Murtsi’s older posts back from around the time, but tldr it was loads of fun. Murtsi is a great locker room addition and any team would be happy to have him. As for why I mocked him to the Crash, I recall him being part of the Kansas City Coyotes back in Season 18, whose main color is purple. So, I thought, why not place him back on another purple team? Anyways Murtsi is a fantastic pick here, great value for the twelfth overall selection, 10/10 would draft again.
With the Thirteenth Overall Selection, the New York Silverbacks select…
The Burj Khalifa from the United Arab Emirates
In a shocking move, the Silverback decided to go big, literally. Forget football players, what New York really needs is the tallest building in the world. The city hasn’t held that title since 1972, when the Empire State Building was surpassed by the Willis Tower in Chicago (known as the Sears Tower at the time). By selecting the Burj Khalifa, New York aims to reclaim its architectural dominance over the world and show that they’re not just thinking about football, they’re making a statement. The Burj Khalifa is a symbol of the heights the Silverbacks aspire to reach. Overall, this is a great selection by the Silverbacks, and I’m sure their mascot will enjoy climbing New York’s newest skyscraper.
With the Fourteenth Overall Selection, the Baltimore Hawks select…
A Trophy Case for their newest Ultimus trophy
The Hawks have decided they’re not just planning for the future, they’re decorating for it. Why bother with low TPE rookies when they already have their eyes on the prize? After winning their latest Ultimus, it’s clear they’re in need of a new trophy case to hold their ever-growing collection. And this isn't just any ordinary trophy case mind you. This is a top-of-the-line, fully customized, climate-controlled case with LED lighting that will showcase their championship hardware in all its glory. With their new trophy case ready, the only thing left to do is win the next trophy. This selection clearly demonstrates their intent to keep winning, and they seem confident that they will.
That brings us to the end of this first round. All in all, I feel like every team got better in one way or another. I have to once again apologize for not releasing this mock draft before the first-rounder PT closed, I’m sure you all got at least some of these picks right anyway. If anyone disagrees with my selections, feel free to let me know. You may be wrong, but I’m still open to hearing your reasons for thinking you’re right. Anyway, I had a fun time writing this and I’ll have an even more fun time getting my 2.5x media payout.
Initially, I didn’t plan to create a mock draft, but after coming across so many poorly executed ones, I felt it was necessary to step in and share my insights. It’s important to me that we have a well-informed discussion as we approach the draft. This first-round mock draft is not just a collection of random predictions, it’s based on factual information and careful analysis of current trends and player performances. I believe it accurately reflects what will happen during the draft, considering team needs and potential trades. HO, I'm sorry that I'm leaking the draft before the stream, but I just felt like posting this media is something I had to do. That being said, let us begin with the first overall selection.
Wait actually really quickly before we get started, I need to quickly preface this mock draft by saying the order of picks might be completely off, I just copied it from another mock so if I accidentally placed your team in the wrong spot, sorry about that, just a simple mistake. Anyway, let’s get back to what I was saying. Let us begin with the first overall selection.
With the First Overall Selection, the Orange County Otters select…
The Bondi Beach Buccaneers
The entire Bondi Beach roster should be the consensus first overall pick. Right now, Orange County has a team that is performing nearly as poorly as a DSFL team. To make matters worse, their star wide receiver, Chopper Donquixote, just recently retired and got traded away, and according to Lemonoppy, he accounted for a tenth of the team’s total TPE. With that massive loss, they might actually end up being worse than a DSFL team. With all that being said, the only way to be better than a DSFL team is to take the very best one, and that is the Ultimini-winning Bondi Beach Buccaneers, a team stacked with talent and proven success. While other teams with send-downs on Bondi Beach might complain, drafting the entire Buccaneers roster would give Orange County the boost they desperately need. It might even help them win two whole games this season, though honestly, that seems extremely unlikely.
With the Second Overall Selection, the Colorado Yeti select…
Taonga Kofi from the Colorado Yeti
With this pick, the Yeti are making the obvious selection by taking Taonga Kofi once again. The first overall pick for the Yeti in the season 50 draft has been has shown steady growth and impact on both sides of the ball last season as a send-down and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. From my personal experience, I can say that Midknight is a fantastic user. As a rookie mentor, Midknight has helped me and the other rookies more than a few times and Colorado understands the value that a user like that brings to the team. By picking Kofi once again, they’re not only getting a talented player but also reinforcing their locker room culture with someone who’s proven to be a great influence. Midknight may be disappointed that he fell to the second selection in this draft but he’s sure to make an impact on that Yeti team.
With the Third Overall Selection, the Berlin Fire Salamanders select…
Xander Le Roux from the Dallas Birddogs
This is another homerun selection. The fourth-highest TPE player in this season 51 draft class had an outstanding season for the Birddogs, finishing with 102 tackles, 5 forced fumbles, 4 interceptions, and 33 passes deflected. These impressive stats earned Le Roux a nomination for the DSFL Defensive Player of the Year award. However, beyond such an amazing player lies an amazing user named Zeagle. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of talking to Zeagle, you’re missing out. I still remember spamming the Arizona war room with Zeagle propaganda during the season 25 draft, it got so bad that our general manager at the time, Unicorn, threatened to kick Zamir and me out of the war room. Safe to say that the selection ended up paying dividends. Every team could use a user like Zeagle, making the selection for the Fire Salamanders a simple choice.
With the Fourth Overall Selection, the San Jose Sabercats select…
DarknessRising from the Head Office
Just to clarify, this selection is not the Colorado Yeti linebacker Ferdinand Hyde, that would be cheating. Rather this selection is the commissioner himself DarknessRising. Out of all of the selections in this mock draft, this is the one I’m most surprised other mock drafters didn’t make. This feels like a perfect match. The Sabercats have had a glaring need for a commissioner for as long as I can remember, with their closest solution being Marcella Toriki back in Season 18. Darkness checks all the boxes the Sabercats are looking for in a commissioner: strong influence, consistent activity, and a non-American time zone. I’m sure San Jose is thrilled to have finally found their guy. They can look forward to a new era of success with Darkness at the helm.
With the Fifth Overall Selection, the Baltimore Hawks select…
Benji Raga from the Dallas Birddogs Waiver Squad
The reigning champions are in a position to select the best player available, and in this case, that player is a Season 52 prospect named Benji Raga. As a defensive tackle, he possesses many of the qualities a championship-winning teams look for in a defender. While he may struggle with tackling and lacks a bit of strength, he makes up for it with impressive speed for someone his size. His user is SabaDonutMan, whose first player was Arizona Outlaws legend and Hall of Famer Saba Donut. I’ve only heard positive things about this user, so I’m confident he’ll be a great addition to any team. This pick is the ultimate investment in the Hawks' future as no team has ever made such a future-oriented selection. However, with Raga leading their defensive line, I’m confident they will become perennial Ultimus contenders.
With the Sixth Overall Selection, the Austin Copperheads select…
A TRADE!!!
They will be trading with…
THE TIJUANA LUCHADORES
And with the Sixth Overall Selection, the Tijuana Luchadores select…
Kai Ware from the Tijuana Luchadores
Tijuana management has made the smartest move in the history of the DSFL. Kai Ware is the Luchadores' fifth-highest TPE player and the highest in the Season 51 draft class. As such the possibility of losing him to the ISFL is too much of a risk for Tijuana to take, so they decided to take matters into their own hands. In an unprecedented trade, the Luchadores trade an undisclosed amount of cap space to the Austin Copperheads to make sure that their best player doesn’t get stolen away. On the user side, Hepha is a great user and I’m sure Tijuana leadership will be excited to keep them in the locker room. Overall keeping Kai Ware in Tijuana is the clear solution to their woes, and it puts them in a prime position to contend for the ultimini in season 51.
With the Seventh Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
100 Million ISFL Sim Dollars from the ISFL Bank
This is an excellent selection by the Crash. Instead of taking a big risk by choosing a player, they’ve opted for financial security by selecting 100 million Sim Dollars—a move that showcases both forward-thinking and long-term strategy. With an assumed interest rate of 4.1%, in 10 seasons (roughly the average length of an ISFL player’s career), this investment will grow to $149,453,914.68. That’s nearly 50% growth, giving Cape Town significant financial flexibility to make key moves in the future, whether it’s signing top free agents, retaining key players, or blowing up the team with trades. This decision ensures they stay competitive in both cap management and roster building. It’s a smart, high-quality pick by a team with serious Ultimus aspirations.
With the Eight Overall Selection, the Orange County Otters select…
I honestly don’t know
Yeah, I’m completely out of ideas for what Orange County should do at this point, the team is in such a terrible position. The Otters’ downfall is something I never would have predicted 30 seasons ago. Things are so bad that I’ve placed 3.5 million Sim Dollars on them losing to a DSFL team, and honestly, it doesn’t even feel like a risky bet. That’s how far expectations have dropped. It’s hard to imagine how they’ll turn things around, but right now, it feels like they’re destined for yet another first overall selection, no matter who they select here.
With the Ninth Overall Selection, the Osaka Kaiju select…
Godzilla the King of Monsters
The Kaiju take advantage of Orange County’s indecision and select arguably the world’s most well-known Kaiju, Godzilla. Standing at an impressive 393 feet (120 meters) tall, according to Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019), Godzilla boasts the best physical profile of any prospect in this draft. His sheer size and unmatched strength make him a dominant force at whatever position Osaka wants it to play at. Beyond just his on-field presence, Godzilla’s ability to level cities will come in handy whenever the Kaiju lose an away game. However, I think the most important impact Godzilla will have on the Kaiju is in their merchandise sales. With his global fame and iconic image, Godzilla branded jerseys, action figures, and memorabilia are sure to fly off the shelves, earning the Kaiju millions and millions of sim dollars. The team’s fanbase will likely grow as fast nearly as fast as their revenue, with supporters from around the world flocking to see the King of Monsters in action. The amount of revenue they’ll generate could be enough to fund a small country. A fantastic pick by the Osaka Kaiju, and I’ll be sure to pre-order my Godzilla jersey right away!
With the Tenth Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
Jake from State Farm
Cape Town management is thrilled that their second-rated prospect fell to their second selection. Jake brings unmatched versatility to the table; he can handle everything from insurance claims to calming the nerves of stressed teammates, he truly is a good neighbor. With a name like the “Crash,” having an insurance agent of Jake’s caliber is crucial to their success. Jake’s ability to bundle home and auto insurance will ensure that everyone is well-covered, both on and off the field. His knack for delivering "great coverage" will not only be invaluable to the Crash’s defense but will also help shut down opposing quarterbacks by always being there when the team needs him. Jake is a game-changer, and by guaranteeing the lowest prices possible, Cape Town knows they’ve made a winning pick.
With the Eleventh Overall Selection, the San Jose Sabercats select…
STOLEN BY THE ARIZONA OUTLAWS
You heard me right, the big bad Outlaws have just stolen San Jose’s eleventh selection.
And with the Eleventh Overall Selection, the Arizona Outlaws select…
THE ARIZONA OUTLAWS PASS
In the ultimate sign of disrespect, the villainous Outlaws steal the eleventh overall selection from their greatest historical rival, San Jose (technically it might be Orange County, but they’re so bad that we’ll let them be), only to pass on the selection. In all my time in the ISFL, I’ve never seen such a cold-blooded, vindictive move. Never before has a team stolen another team’s pick just to pass on it, leaving both teams without a player. It’s utterly diabolical, but then again, what else can you expect from the Outlaws? They always find a way to cheat and win and this malicious move just adds another chapter to their legacy of bending the rules to their advantage.
With the Twelfth Overall Selection, the Cape Town Crash select…
Abstract Geometry from the Minnesota Grey Ducks
I like Murtsi, so you should like Murtsi too. The player with the second-highest TPE in this Season 51 draft class had an impressive season with the Grey Ducks. He finished the campaign with 81 tackles, including 10 tackles for a loss, 3 forced fumbles, 1 fumble recovery, 13 sacks, 1 interception, 6 pass deflections, and 1 touchdown. He is clearly a future leader of any defense. Additionally, he has an elite player name, and when I say elite, I mean truly elite. Abstract Geometry will come in and immediately be the smartest player in any locker room. However, the best part about this player is his user Murtsi. He created waaaay back in season 18 back when yours truly was still around. Now it’s almost impossible for me to explain what went on in rookie during that season but if you are curious make sure to check some of Murtsi’s older posts back from around the time, but tldr it was loads of fun. Murtsi is a great locker room addition and any team would be happy to have him. As for why I mocked him to the Crash, I recall him being part of the Kansas City Coyotes back in Season 18, whose main color is purple. So, I thought, why not place him back on another purple team? Anyways Murtsi is a fantastic pick here, great value for the twelfth overall selection, 10/10 would draft again.
With the Thirteenth Overall Selection, the New York Silverbacks select…
The Burj Khalifa from the United Arab Emirates
In a shocking move, the Silverback decided to go big, literally. Forget football players, what New York really needs is the tallest building in the world. The city hasn’t held that title since 1972, when the Empire State Building was surpassed by the Willis Tower in Chicago (known as the Sears Tower at the time). By selecting the Burj Khalifa, New York aims to reclaim its architectural dominance over the world and show that they’re not just thinking about football, they’re making a statement. The Burj Khalifa is a symbol of the heights the Silverbacks aspire to reach. Overall, this is a great selection by the Silverbacks, and I’m sure their mascot will enjoy climbing New York’s newest skyscraper.
With the Fourteenth Overall Selection, the Baltimore Hawks select…
A Trophy Case for their newest Ultimus trophy
The Hawks have decided they’re not just planning for the future, they’re decorating for it. Why bother with low TPE rookies when they already have their eyes on the prize? After winning their latest Ultimus, it’s clear they’re in need of a new trophy case to hold their ever-growing collection. And this isn't just any ordinary trophy case mind you. This is a top-of-the-line, fully customized, climate-controlled case with LED lighting that will showcase their championship hardware in all its glory. With their new trophy case ready, the only thing left to do is win the next trophy. This selection clearly demonstrates their intent to keep winning, and they seem confident that they will.
That brings us to the end of this first round. All in all, I feel like every team got better in one way or another. I have to once again apologize for not releasing this mock draft before the first-rounder PT closed, I’m sure you all got at least some of these picks right anyway. If anyone disagrees with my selections, feel free to let me know. You may be wrong, but I’m still open to hearing your reasons for thinking you’re right. Anyway, I had a fun time writing this and I’ll have an even more fun time getting my 2.5x media payout.