With an offseason of never ending drama I have a bombshell to drop on the so called "Good Guys" of the league.
The New Orleans Second Line cheated in S19.
The Second Line improved from an abysmal 5-8 record in S18 to a playoff 8-5 team in S19. This does not happen. You don't just win 3 more games in this league. Never has a team won 3 more games than the previous season without something shady happened.
NOLA fans will say "we had a great draft class" and "We signed Toriki"
Well if Toriki was responsible for 3 more wins why didn't San Jose lose 3 extra games? SJS in S18 were 4-9 and SJS in S19 were 4-9 with a change in exactly 0 wins. Which means that Toriki added 0 wins to this NOLA outburst. You might say "Hall that's not how math works" well when you get a PHD in NSFL Math then maybe I'll listen to you just so I can tell you how wrong you are and how useless your degree is.
A TEAM DOESN'T JUST WIN 3 GAMES
So here's what happened to this cheating second line. They banged on trash cans and used buzzers hidden away under bandaids to know what plays other teams were running.
"But Hall how is that possible?" you ask.
Well to start off with the dumpster diving. NOLA had cameras pointed exactly at the coaches mouth that would allow them to see and hear what plays the opposing coach was calling. A trainer would watch this video with a TV that was strategically placed behind the NOLA bench and the trainer would then bang on the trashcan to notify the team of a play.
1 bang = run right
2 bangs = run left
3 bangs = pass left
4 bangs = pass right
5 bangs = play action
6 bangs = reverse
7 bangs = Armstrong scramble
0 bangs = Chicago
Using this master plan NOLA was able to know every play before it happened. How else do you explain the Second Line picking off 16 passes in S19 when they only picked off 9 all of S18?
It also helped the offense, as Quarterback Fransisco threw 16 interceptions in S18 and some how improved to having an elite 11 interceptions. Are you telling me Francisco put in work in the offseason? Because that's a lie. He listened to trash drums that told him exactly what kind of coverage the defense would be in to help him cut down on interceptions and if you don't belive that then you believe the world is flat as well and Vaccines cause baby fungus.
If you need more proof this picture surfaced on twitter by an unknown source believed to be McCormick's niece showing NOLA star running back Forrest Gump during their week 3 matchup against Arizona were they would beat the powerhouse Outlaws 57-7. In the background looks to be a trashcan and a person next to it. Very suspicious for a football game.
As you can see, Gump seems to be zoned out, almost like hes listening to something. Banging maybe?
When asked, an anonymous NOLA player who looks alot like Bjørn Ironside said, "The only trash on our sideline is our defense." He refused to commit further leading me to believe that the cover up expands to its players as well as its front office.
If the cans weren't enough there were players that were thought to have electric buzzers on their bodies that were covered with bandaids that would signal the plays to them.
This seems a bit farfetched but a picture of running back Toriki was found with a suspicious bandaid on her arm.
Did Toriki create the plan to cheat to finally get in the playoffs after 2 long and dreadful seasons with Norfolk and SJS?
Our was it a plan devised by NOLA GM and Tijuana Saint Jimmy Dugan back when he was in the DSFL?
The Luchadores were perennial Ultimini winners every season he was their GM and after he leaves they have struggled to win the big one, losing the past 2 seasons.
Is it because Dugans cheating ways were washed away by the new GMs and he started his cheating in NOLA?
Did Dugan wait a couple seasons before applying his schemes to take the heat off of himself and not making it obvious?
Whatever the case may be. The Second Line decided to cheat their way to a playoff spot and if they do win the big game they need to be deeply investigated.
When this issue was brought up to the NSFL Head Office they reported that, "There might be something going on but we didn't really feel like investigating so we're going to say we didn't find any evidence to cheating"
So without the backing of our HO we now need to go out on our own and build this case against NOLA before the play stealing epidemic gets out of hand.
The New Orleans Second Line cheated in S19.
The Second Line improved from an abysmal 5-8 record in S18 to a playoff 8-5 team in S19. This does not happen. You don't just win 3 more games in this league. Never has a team won 3 more games than the previous season without something shady happened.
NOLA fans will say "we had a great draft class" and "We signed Toriki"
Well if Toriki was responsible for 3 more wins why didn't San Jose lose 3 extra games? SJS in S18 were 4-9 and SJS in S19 were 4-9 with a change in exactly 0 wins. Which means that Toriki added 0 wins to this NOLA outburst. You might say "Hall that's not how math works" well when you get a PHD in NSFL Math then maybe I'll listen to you just so I can tell you how wrong you are and how useless your degree is.
A TEAM DOESN'T JUST WIN 3 GAMES
So here's what happened to this cheating second line. They banged on trash cans and used buzzers hidden away under bandaids to know what plays other teams were running.
"But Hall how is that possible?" you ask.
Well to start off with the dumpster diving. NOLA had cameras pointed exactly at the coaches mouth that would allow them to see and hear what plays the opposing coach was calling. A trainer would watch this video with a TV that was strategically placed behind the NOLA bench and the trainer would then bang on the trashcan to notify the team of a play.
1 bang = run right
2 bangs = run left
3 bangs = pass left
4 bangs = pass right
5 bangs = play action
6 bangs = reverse
7 bangs = Armstrong scramble
0 bangs = Chicago
Using this master plan NOLA was able to know every play before it happened. How else do you explain the Second Line picking off 16 passes in S19 when they only picked off 9 all of S18?
It also helped the offense, as Quarterback Fransisco threw 16 interceptions in S18 and some how improved to having an elite 11 interceptions. Are you telling me Francisco put in work in the offseason? Because that's a lie. He listened to trash drums that told him exactly what kind of coverage the defense would be in to help him cut down on interceptions and if you don't belive that then you believe the world is flat as well and Vaccines cause baby fungus.
If you need more proof this picture surfaced on twitter by an unknown source believed to be McCormick's niece showing NOLA star running back Forrest Gump during their week 3 matchup against Arizona were they would beat the powerhouse Outlaws 57-7. In the background looks to be a trashcan and a person next to it. Very suspicious for a football game.
As you can see, Gump seems to be zoned out, almost like hes listening to something. Banging maybe?
When asked, an anonymous NOLA player who looks alot like Bjørn Ironside said, "The only trash on our sideline is our defense." He refused to commit further leading me to believe that the cover up expands to its players as well as its front office.
If the cans weren't enough there were players that were thought to have electric buzzers on their bodies that were covered with bandaids that would signal the plays to them.
This seems a bit farfetched but a picture of running back Toriki was found with a suspicious bandaid on her arm.
Did Toriki create the plan to cheat to finally get in the playoffs after 2 long and dreadful seasons with Norfolk and SJS?
Our was it a plan devised by NOLA GM and Tijuana Saint Jimmy Dugan back when he was in the DSFL?
The Luchadores were perennial Ultimini winners every season he was their GM and after he leaves they have struggled to win the big one, losing the past 2 seasons.
Is it because Dugans cheating ways were washed away by the new GMs and he started his cheating in NOLA?
Did Dugan wait a couple seasons before applying his schemes to take the heat off of himself and not making it obvious?
Whatever the case may be. The Second Line decided to cheat their way to a playoff spot and if they do win the big game they need to be deeply investigated.
When this issue was brought up to the NSFL Head Office they reported that, "There might be something going on but we didn't really feel like investigating so we're going to say we didn't find any evidence to cheating"
So without the backing of our HO we now need to go out on our own and build this case against NOLA before the play stealing epidemic gets out of hand.