How Acura Skyline, incoming DSFL rookie running back for the expansion team London Royals, revamped his diet in order to maximize his strength, size, and power to increase his draft stock.
SANTA CLARA, CALIFORNIA.
Acura Skyline, despite standing at 6-foot-1 and weighing over 210 pounds, was convinced that his “lack of size” would be a major barrier to a high draft position. As a result, about three months before the DSFL draft, Skyline paid a vision to the esteemed nutritionist Abraham Google. In the course of exploring Bodybuilding.com forums that advertised mass cultivating solutions such as drinking blended raw chicken, swallowing whole billiard balls, and rotating counterclockwise in the shower to slow your metabolism, Skyline saw the most ludicrous diet plan on the planet and decided to try it out.
Famous former WWE wrestler and small-time movie actor Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, in order to maintain his legendary physique, eats more than 5,000 calories a day. The calories, spread over seven meals, include roughly 2.3 pounds of cod, a fish allegedly extremely rich in protein. The rest is eggs, steak, chicken, vegetables and potatoes — all told, about 10 pounds of food per day. In one year, The Rock consumes more than one-third of a ton of cod alone.
Unlike Johnson, Skyline is neither a former pro wrestler, nor a staple of the “Fast and Furious” movie franchise. He might be a baller, but he did not have a major HBO 30 minute comedy series that really flagged in the final two seasons. He’s just a normal athlete with a commitment to making his body as physically large as possible despite, again, already being very physically large. Additionally, he is extremely allergic to cod.
And when he read about The Rock’s daily nutritional regimen, he did not feel awe or disgust or fear, but instead saw a way to completely maximize his cultivation of mass. However, he had to replace the cod with other sources of protein, primarily low fat cottage cheese. I repeat, Skyline decided to replace the cod with low fat cottage cheese at a 1:1 weight ratio, meaning that Skyline was eating two and a half pounds of low fat cottage cheese every day. Here’s the routine:
Meal One: Steak and eggs, with spinach and home-style potatoes on the side.
Meal Two: A protein shake of blended cottage cheese, honey, and matcha green tea powder for additional flavor.
Meal Three: A grilled chicken sandwich with lettuce, pickles, bean sprouts, and mustard.
Meal Four: Another steak with a baked sweet potato, asparagus, and a serving of cottage cheese.
Meal Five: Grilled chicken with sautéed zucchini and mushrooms and a side of rice.
Meal Six: Sautéed cottage cheese (?????) with raisins.
Meal Seven: Fruit (often pears and apples) and the remaining cottage cheese.
Skyline ate this exact daily diet, with complete commitment and zero deviation, for three months. The main takeaway: Being The Rock is exhausting, expensive and absolutely much worse than already expected when you are consuming so much cottage cheese and preparing it in ways that are described as “sautéed” and “blended” and that this writer sincerely hopes does not mean actually mean either of those things.
Based on the receipts that Skyline kept — painstakingly and accurately compiled over the course of this exercise — he spent a total of $1,262 on food. That’s about $42 per day, including $18 worth of cottage cheese.
So it costs a lot of money to eat in such a gluttonous yet facially healthy and nutritious way, but it also takes a huge amount of time time. Every three or four days, Skyline said, he spent over an hour and a half on food preparation. Making 25 pounds of food just for himself every few days is probably the worst part of the entire exercise, he said. For a while, he actually found himself looking forward to the allegedly but almost certainly not sautéed cottage cheese the most because it required almost no preparation (once again, I have no idea what sautéed cottage cheese could possibly be).
Eating each of Skyline’s seven daily meals takes about 25 minutes — culminating in close to three hours a day of cramming cottage cheese down his throat. “The biggest challenge with the eating is how much it interrupts your day and takes over your routine,” Skyline said. “Every couple of hours you have to pause everything you’re doing and swallow some huge amount of food. At least one episode of The Office is the same length as each meal, so I’m doing some hardcore binge rewatching. Shoutout Netflix. Please try to keep the rights to the show, I’m not trying to get another subscription service like Peacock, I mean I just f***ing got Disney Plus so I could watch the Mandalorian. Do we really need more? I get that online streaming platforms are great because instead of a middle man we get content straight from producers, but I would definitely pay a premium for some sort of combination package. Is old TV the new TV? I need to call my business manager, hold on a sec.” (Note: These types of tangents were incredibly common when interviewing Skyline for this article)
This intense, loosely Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson inspired diet hasn’t affected Skyline’s ability to train and prepare for the DSFL draft, besides the fact that he has to bring food with him to his training facility to make sure that his meals are consumed. “I had to drive out to Tijuana to do some pre draft interviews out there,” he told me, “and I had to bring a whole bunch of cottage cheese with me. The GM’s over there didn’t get it at all. They kept asking me like ‘is eating that much dairy really a good idea’ or ‘why is this cottage cheese such a weird consistency?’ I didn’t have the time to explain it was sautéed in between all the physical testing and tequila sampling and stuff. I think at the end of the day that’s why they didn’t draft me: they had some weird biases related to my cottage cheese eating. Is that discrimination? Is being someone who eats a ton of cottage cheese a protected class? Hold up, I gotta call my attorney.”
To offset the calories, Skyline’s training certainly matched if not outmatched that of The Rock. Six days a week Skyline does an hour and a half of cardio comprised of both skill training and other activities such as sprints, swimming, or Soul Cycle. Additionally, he spends an hour and a half on weights four days a week, primarily focusing on lower body explosivity during this three-month period. “I like to plan my workouts through different microcycles and mesocycles,” Webster said. “Right now it’s explosivity, and next up we’re going to go into a hypertrophy cycle and really grow these quads. You ever see pictures of Tour de France bikers? I know they’re all on juice, but I’m pretty sure with this cottage cheese thing I can get at least half as veiny.”
Tracking these workouts over the three-month period, he put in work at the gym for about 180 total hours. On top of the three hours a day of eating (a total of 252 hours over this period), the time commitment is pretty incredible. I’ve consulted the primary literature, and I’ve verified that there are only 24 hours in a day. Skyline spent so much of that just focused on being big that it is mind boggling. Reminder: He is already a pretty huge guy.
However, by the end of the three months, Skyline’s weight on the scale had barely moved — already an active person, he started out at 211 pounds and finished 90 days later at 215. This is a difference that may indicate some small increase in lean muscle mass, but still falls within the possible range of water retention.
“My calves have gotten a little bigger, and everyone knows those are so hard to add mass to, and my traps and lats have gotten a bit thicker, and I feel like I’ve gotten a bit leaner, which is again totally unexpected, and I know that the measurements don’t totally reflect what I’m seeing but I’m still pretty sure I’m right,” he said. “I thought I would be putting on some sort of power belly, you know? Not like Arnold, more like that big motherf***er from Thrones. Thor or whatever. Icelandic dude. That dude is big my man. Man is a real dude. A huge block of marbled steak. I gotta figure out what he’s eating because this cottage cheese is not getting me quite there.”
Beyond the very minimal physical changes that Skyline experienced, he did see a pretty significant increase in physical ability while on this diet. When he started his new eating program, his flat bench press was 285 pounds; now it’s 295. He was originally exploding to a 35 inch vertical, but now it is all the way up to 36.5 inches. Maybe something can be said for the sports performance enhancing capabilities of this diet, though I am inclined to believe that this boost in performance has much more to do with his aggressive, dedicated, and actual science based training regimen than it has to do with whatever sautéed cottage cheese is.
Now, regardless of how much the diet actually affected anything, all of the hard work has paid off. Skyline was drafted 25th overall by the London Royals, and says that he wouldn’t change a thing.
“I’m stoked to be out here in London man,” Skyline shared with me over the phone the other day. “I love the city, it’s great to be out here by some family, and I just got a place. The team is amazing, all super welcoming, and really driven to make an impact in the Lion’s first ever season. I even found out some of those big dude stronglifter guys are out here, this guy named Eddie Hall is not too far away and that guy is massive. I gotta get some of his nutrition tips. Maybe I’ll even get on a flight to Iceland, it’s not that far, and go see the Mountain. I gotta know if he actually thinks he can bust somebody’s head open in real life like he did to the Mando. Maybe that’s the move, get the Mountain on the Mandalorian, he could be some sort of super big Wookie or something. This is a great idea, I gotta make sure it gets to Favreau. Hold on a sec, I need to call my business manager with this.”
Skyline’s coaches, while thrilled to have him, were not thrilled when they heard about his eating habits. “Oh yeah, coach’s mouth basically dropped to the floor when I told him about the cottage cheese. He sent me to a dietician and nutritionist to revamp some of what I’m eating. I did some testing, and as it turns out, I’m actually lactose intolerant! So, you know, that explains a whole lot.”
Good luck Acura Skyline.
(1842 words, 1.5x draft bonus)
SANTA CLARA, CALIFORNIA.
Acura Skyline, despite standing at 6-foot-1 and weighing over 210 pounds, was convinced that his “lack of size” would be a major barrier to a high draft position. As a result, about three months before the DSFL draft, Skyline paid a vision to the esteemed nutritionist Abraham Google. In the course of exploring Bodybuilding.com forums that advertised mass cultivating solutions such as drinking blended raw chicken, swallowing whole billiard balls, and rotating counterclockwise in the shower to slow your metabolism, Skyline saw the most ludicrous diet plan on the planet and decided to try it out.
Famous former WWE wrestler and small-time movie actor Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, in order to maintain his legendary physique, eats more than 5,000 calories a day. The calories, spread over seven meals, include roughly 2.3 pounds of cod, a fish allegedly extremely rich in protein. The rest is eggs, steak, chicken, vegetables and potatoes — all told, about 10 pounds of food per day. In one year, The Rock consumes more than one-third of a ton of cod alone.
Unlike Johnson, Skyline is neither a former pro wrestler, nor a staple of the “Fast and Furious” movie franchise. He might be a baller, but he did not have a major HBO 30 minute comedy series that really flagged in the final two seasons. He’s just a normal athlete with a commitment to making his body as physically large as possible despite, again, already being very physically large. Additionally, he is extremely allergic to cod.
And when he read about The Rock’s daily nutritional regimen, he did not feel awe or disgust or fear, but instead saw a way to completely maximize his cultivation of mass. However, he had to replace the cod with other sources of protein, primarily low fat cottage cheese. I repeat, Skyline decided to replace the cod with low fat cottage cheese at a 1:1 weight ratio, meaning that Skyline was eating two and a half pounds of low fat cottage cheese every day. Here’s the routine:
Meal One: Steak and eggs, with spinach and home-style potatoes on the side.
Meal Two: A protein shake of blended cottage cheese, honey, and matcha green tea powder for additional flavor.
Meal Three: A grilled chicken sandwich with lettuce, pickles, bean sprouts, and mustard.
Meal Four: Another steak with a baked sweet potato, asparagus, and a serving of cottage cheese.
Meal Five: Grilled chicken with sautéed zucchini and mushrooms and a side of rice.
Meal Six: Sautéed cottage cheese (?????) with raisins.
Meal Seven: Fruit (often pears and apples) and the remaining cottage cheese.
Skyline ate this exact daily diet, with complete commitment and zero deviation, for three months. The main takeaway: Being The Rock is exhausting, expensive and absolutely much worse than already expected when you are consuming so much cottage cheese and preparing it in ways that are described as “sautéed” and “blended” and that this writer sincerely hopes does not mean actually mean either of those things.
Based on the receipts that Skyline kept — painstakingly and accurately compiled over the course of this exercise — he spent a total of $1,262 on food. That’s about $42 per day, including $18 worth of cottage cheese.
So it costs a lot of money to eat in such a gluttonous yet facially healthy and nutritious way, but it also takes a huge amount of time time. Every three or four days, Skyline said, he spent over an hour and a half on food preparation. Making 25 pounds of food just for himself every few days is probably the worst part of the entire exercise, he said. For a while, he actually found himself looking forward to the allegedly but almost certainly not sautéed cottage cheese the most because it required almost no preparation (once again, I have no idea what sautéed cottage cheese could possibly be).
Eating each of Skyline’s seven daily meals takes about 25 minutes — culminating in close to three hours a day of cramming cottage cheese down his throat. “The biggest challenge with the eating is how much it interrupts your day and takes over your routine,” Skyline said. “Every couple of hours you have to pause everything you’re doing and swallow some huge amount of food. At least one episode of The Office is the same length as each meal, so I’m doing some hardcore binge rewatching. Shoutout Netflix. Please try to keep the rights to the show, I’m not trying to get another subscription service like Peacock, I mean I just f***ing got Disney Plus so I could watch the Mandalorian. Do we really need more? I get that online streaming platforms are great because instead of a middle man we get content straight from producers, but I would definitely pay a premium for some sort of combination package. Is old TV the new TV? I need to call my business manager, hold on a sec.” (Note: These types of tangents were incredibly common when interviewing Skyline for this article)
This intense, loosely Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson inspired diet hasn’t affected Skyline’s ability to train and prepare for the DSFL draft, besides the fact that he has to bring food with him to his training facility to make sure that his meals are consumed. “I had to drive out to Tijuana to do some pre draft interviews out there,” he told me, “and I had to bring a whole bunch of cottage cheese with me. The GM’s over there didn’t get it at all. They kept asking me like ‘is eating that much dairy really a good idea’ or ‘why is this cottage cheese such a weird consistency?’ I didn’t have the time to explain it was sautéed in between all the physical testing and tequila sampling and stuff. I think at the end of the day that’s why they didn’t draft me: they had some weird biases related to my cottage cheese eating. Is that discrimination? Is being someone who eats a ton of cottage cheese a protected class? Hold up, I gotta call my attorney.”
To offset the calories, Skyline’s training certainly matched if not outmatched that of The Rock. Six days a week Skyline does an hour and a half of cardio comprised of both skill training and other activities such as sprints, swimming, or Soul Cycle. Additionally, he spends an hour and a half on weights four days a week, primarily focusing on lower body explosivity during this three-month period. “I like to plan my workouts through different microcycles and mesocycles,” Webster said. “Right now it’s explosivity, and next up we’re going to go into a hypertrophy cycle and really grow these quads. You ever see pictures of Tour de France bikers? I know they’re all on juice, but I’m pretty sure with this cottage cheese thing I can get at least half as veiny.”
Tracking these workouts over the three-month period, he put in work at the gym for about 180 total hours. On top of the three hours a day of eating (a total of 252 hours over this period), the time commitment is pretty incredible. I’ve consulted the primary literature, and I’ve verified that there are only 24 hours in a day. Skyline spent so much of that just focused on being big that it is mind boggling. Reminder: He is already a pretty huge guy.
However, by the end of the three months, Skyline’s weight on the scale had barely moved — already an active person, he started out at 211 pounds and finished 90 days later at 215. This is a difference that may indicate some small increase in lean muscle mass, but still falls within the possible range of water retention.
“My calves have gotten a little bigger, and everyone knows those are so hard to add mass to, and my traps and lats have gotten a bit thicker, and I feel like I’ve gotten a bit leaner, which is again totally unexpected, and I know that the measurements don’t totally reflect what I’m seeing but I’m still pretty sure I’m right,” he said. “I thought I would be putting on some sort of power belly, you know? Not like Arnold, more like that big motherf***er from Thrones. Thor or whatever. Icelandic dude. That dude is big my man. Man is a real dude. A huge block of marbled steak. I gotta figure out what he’s eating because this cottage cheese is not getting me quite there.”
Beyond the very minimal physical changes that Skyline experienced, he did see a pretty significant increase in physical ability while on this diet. When he started his new eating program, his flat bench press was 285 pounds; now it’s 295. He was originally exploding to a 35 inch vertical, but now it is all the way up to 36.5 inches. Maybe something can be said for the sports performance enhancing capabilities of this diet, though I am inclined to believe that this boost in performance has much more to do with his aggressive, dedicated, and actual science based training regimen than it has to do with whatever sautéed cottage cheese is.
Now, regardless of how much the diet actually affected anything, all of the hard work has paid off. Skyline was drafted 25th overall by the London Royals, and says that he wouldn’t change a thing.
“I’m stoked to be out here in London man,” Skyline shared with me over the phone the other day. “I love the city, it’s great to be out here by some family, and I just got a place. The team is amazing, all super welcoming, and really driven to make an impact in the Lion’s first ever season. I even found out some of those big dude stronglifter guys are out here, this guy named Eddie Hall is not too far away and that guy is massive. I gotta get some of his nutrition tips. Maybe I’ll even get on a flight to Iceland, it’s not that far, and go see the Mountain. I gotta know if he actually thinks he can bust somebody’s head open in real life like he did to the Mando. Maybe that’s the move, get the Mountain on the Mandalorian, he could be some sort of super big Wookie or something. This is a great idea, I gotta make sure it gets to Favreau. Hold on a sec, I need to call my business manager with this.”
Skyline’s coaches, while thrilled to have him, were not thrilled when they heard about his eating habits. “Oh yeah, coach’s mouth basically dropped to the floor when I told him about the cottage cheese. He sent me to a dietician and nutritionist to revamp some of what I’m eating. I did some testing, and as it turns out, I’m actually lactose intolerant! So, you know, that explains a whole lot.”
Good luck Acura Skyline.
(1842 words, 1.5x draft bonus)