(S25) - PT 2 - Endorsement Money

[White Cornerback]

Complete the weekly Point Task to earn 3 TPE! All written responses must be at least 200 words. All graphic responses must show at least some effort.

im typing this point task up on my piece of shit laptop right now before I go to sleep so bear with me if this thing is littereted with typos dermot lavelle jrs endorsement was of course with the nsfl/isfl wikipedia. yes thats right he is historian just like his father but of course his father preferred to create history whereas lavelle jr is not very good at football so he just reads, organises and discusses history since he is the weak link in the genetic pool of course

lavelle jr spends his time doing pr campaigns for the wikipedia such as the learn to read program which encourages isfl users to achieve atleast a 90% literarcy rate, this obviously is a very time consuming project as most of you cunts literally cant read. he gets paid lots of money for this campaign of course which does anger oher parts of the league because it directly goes against the ISFL slave wage rulings which dictate that any user in the league should not have a means to make money unless he or she hates doing i, this is a tradition as old a time itself

other duties that lavelle jr has to carry out for the wiki brand including getting the good word out about the wikipedia and leading literal horses to water and that just about wraps up his endorsement duties, thank u all orange man bad

[KoltClassic]

If you’ve spent any time around the locker room you’ll know about Otis Allen’s game day ritual. Before every single game, no matter the stakes or the situation, Otis will have a heaping plate of meatballs. This tradition of eating a ton of meatballs before a game goes back to his high school track and field days. The team would have spaghetti dinners the night before a big track meet, but Allen would save leftover meatballs and eat them the day after before he would throw shot put or discus. Allen’s dedication to continuing this tradition has earned him the nickname of The Meatball amongst his teammates and fans of the Sabercats. This nickname has become so pervasive that popular pasta sauce Ragu has sponsored Otis Allen throughout the duration of his career. The terms of this sponsorship appear to be relatively laid back for Allen. Allen must always have at least two cans of Ragu in his locker with brand labels facing towards cameras. He must always eat his ritual meatballs with some form of sauce (though it remains unclear whether or not Ragu sauce is actually being used). Finally, Allen must participate in a weekly social media segment of “Otis Allen’s Meatballs of the Week”, which highlight great performances from players in the ISFL.

[iStegosauruz]

Lets be real, we all know I'm a real dinosaur. Its hard to deny it. I look like a dinosaur, I talk like a dinosaur, I smell like a dinosaur (don't ask). I just happened to miss the boat on having a dinosaur render. I blame infinite for picking this random Wyoming guy as my render when I was inactive during the DSFL draft process. That being said, I'm a real dinosaur. Thats the point. Considering I'm a dinosaur its obvious I'd be endorsed by Icy Hot. What product do your elderly loved ones use more than anything else? Icy Hot and that crappy offbrand Bengay. They need it to soothe their aching muscles because they've reached the age where everything hurts. They're geriatric dinosaurs and as a result would obviously respond positively to a video advertisement of a real dinosaur lathering that cream on himself like you dream of rubbing lotion on the hot babe at the beach. If its suitable for a prehistoric creature that struggles to move it should be suitable for the 70 year old man who has bad knees. The other benefits to being sponsored by Icy Hot is that I could be best buddies with Shaq. We could have another video of us dominating a pickup basketball game together after using Icy Hot. In reality though we'd probably get schooled. I can't imagine my player is any better at basketball than he is at football and all it takes is one scroll of the index to see that I absolutely suck at football. I blame Dermot.

[WhatAmUs]

Press packet - for immediate release.  Dont fuck this one up again Martha, we need to ink this promo deal with Quigley before Coors gets to his dumb ass.  Also dont include this in the release, dont think I didnt forget about the Edelman fiasco you absolute brick. 

Samuel Adams Brewery is proud to present their newest spokesperson:

Connor Quigley, offensive tackle for the Kansas City Coyotes. 

        Quigley was born in Boston, and lived in Massachusetts for most of his formative years.  Sam Adams beer literally runs through his thick veins; whether it be the smooth and crisp flavors of our flagship Boston Lager, or the seasonal bite and fall comfort of our Sam’s Oktoberfest.  Quigley, however, is most notably a fan of our fantastic New England IPA, which he insists he drinks four of every night before his DSFL games.  Clearly, this absolute powerhouse of a man is fueled by our delicious and affordable selection of regional craft beers. 

When asked about his budding partnership with Samuel Adams, Quigley had this to say:

“I’ve been drinking beer since I was eleven years old.  My first ever beer was a Sam Adams; a beer that I stole off the table when my uncle was passed out drunk at my cousin’s confirmation party.  My dad found out, and beat my ass raw with a crucifix party favor.  I couldn’t feel a goddamn thing, though, thanks to the quality ingredients and balanced alcohol content of Sam Adams!  I look forward to working with my favorite brewery, especially since they said they will ship me a whole keg of  New England IPA every week as long as I promise not to vomit on the field.”

We at Samuel Adam’s look forward immensely to our partnership with Quigley, and are contractually obligated to pay for any future hospital visits and/or rehab!

[ComebackZak]

PBE affiliate

[JaytheGreat]

In the offseason Jayson Kearse was presented with a unique sponsorship opportunity, some of the natives in Northwest Canada decided to do a global marketing pitch for their dream catchers. Considering Kearse his 1st 3 seasons in the Northwest Canada with Yellowknife the people in charge of marketing these dream catchers thought it would be a good idea to bring in a guy who's name is Kearse (pronounced curse) to talk about something that helps fight off curses. For Jayson's part in the commercial it shows him hiding in a fog covered graveyard and then breaks down the door to the victims house. In the next shot Kearse tries to break into a house with a dream catcher but he can't make his way in like there's some kind of force field around the house. While it wasn't Kearse's first commercial it certainly was the most interesting he's been in. Since Jayson just moved to a new team, he decided to donate his check he made from the commercial, half of it going to the Yellowknife community and the other half going to the underprivileged in New York. He did accept a customized dream catcher that has a Wraith, a Hahalua, and a Silverback Gorilla on it and keeps that over his bed at all times including while he's on the road.

[Briedaqueduc]

SHL Affiliation

[JBLAZE_THE_BOSS]

When your bloodline is filled with football royalty, it's not too hard to expect that some serious spokesman opportunities won't pop up from time to time. Looking at Mike Boss Jr and his big personality in Tijuana and Sarasota, the young QB is now the face of many 2 for 1 soda deals at E.L. Convenience Stores all across Tijuana. He sells plastic cups with Luchadores lure sold in collector's sets of five. However, the best and biggest spot he has under his belt is an ad campaign with McDonald's. The king of US fast food has a stranglehold on Mexico as well, and Boss Jr has just announced a new working relationship between the gunslinger and the Clown. Boss will have his face plastered all across McDonald's Restaurants in the Tijuana area offering the "Boss Burger Meal". This meal consists of: Two plain double cheeseburgers with Big Mac sauce, a McChicken, a medium fry, and a large Coke. Boss explains:

"Before I was a famous football player and my dad was the only one in the family with a job, I had to get by on my own allowance for a few years. I would order this meal at McDonald's and be full all day! Even now as an adult when I have worked up an appetite, this is my go-to order. I'm happy to parter with McDonald's and the DSFL to bring this great deal to our fans here in the Tijuana region."

All of the Mexican kids want to be Like Mike-- again.(256 words)

[JKortesi81]

SHL PT

[Fordhammer]

Lalo Salamanca has landed an endorsement with Los Pollos Hermanos. While you might think it's surprising that his arch nemesis Gus Fring has chosen Lalo to represent his product, neither of them are. This is all about business, and Lalo has probably the most marketable face in the league. Lalo is set to appear in a number of ads endorsing the fried chicken chain. These will be primarily TV ads as they want Lalo front and center. Lalo does not come cheap. The terms of his deal have leaked, and they are extremely lucrative for him. Not only does he receive money for each ad he appears in, but he also essentially will receive unlimited fried chicken for life; something that is unheard of in the endorsement business. Sources say Lalo knows where some of Mr. Fring's skeletons are buried, and in this case it seems believable as Fring has been involved in a number of alleged murders.

Lalo will also be doing some Spanish radio ads, which will air primarily in the local Albuquerque markets. Lalo will record an English version as well. While radio is not his first choice, Lalo was willing to make an exception for Los Pollos Hermanos. Hopefully this arrangement will benefit both parties for years to come.