(894 words, this is at the top for a reason)
If you learn one thing about the sim when you first watch it, you probably notice that its time management and aggressiveness is best described as the cross between Andy Reid and Jason Garrett with the competence of Hue Jackson. Part of this is that basically any pass play will have an extra 20 seconds or more taken off of the clock for no reason, even IF a timeout is used afterwards. This makes two minute drills agonizingly difficult in the sim, as in order to get down the field quickly you need to have a big pass play that will take 50 seconds off the clock if it goes 30 yards, or in some cases just end a game or a half outright when you needed just one more second that you DEFINITELY would have in a more accurate simulation, where the players know the meaning of the words "hurry up". And yesterday's week of games gave two very fun examples of how the hurry up offense is so agonizingly difficult in the sim.
Let's start with the one you may not be thinking about. Near the end of the first half of the Hawks vs the Butchers, the Hawks were down 20-14 and had the ball with 3 minutes left. However, they had two huge advantages in the 2 minute drill that not all teams have. For one, they didn't need a touchdown in this situation, and could opt for a field goal past the 30 or so yard line. The other advantage is that a poor kick and a decent return had the Hawks begin the drive at their own 36. Of course, the way the sim works, a 7 yard completion and a 5 yard run take over a minute off the clock, and they hadn't even crossed midfield yet. Then, a 22 yard completion to Doug Howlett and a timeout! Straight to the Chicago 30, well within field goal range, and they even had 1:35 before the play began! They still had time. Of course, even with timeouts, the clock is stupid, and thus it immediately dropped to 55 seconds. Another 5 yard pass and a timeout took 18 seconds off the clock, they were at the 25 with 37 seconds left. Time for one more play. And that one play? A 14 yard run right to the Butchers 11, right in range for the Field Goal to pull them within 3 with an entire second half to play.
They did not get the kick off. For some reason, they didn't even take a timeout. Maybe the game's logic said that the play would take all 37 seconds? They definitely had a timeout left, though honestly I'm pretty sure I've seen NFL kickers line up and kick a field goal in like 11 seconds and in my opinion there should have been at least 20 left on the clock even without a timeout. But, the sim is gonna sim, and the Hawks miss out on 3 points. Even more annoying, even the extremely conservative sim will normally kick from the 25, but I guess the 37 seconds were too much for it to decide to kick on that play.
Would this have mattered in the end? Probably not, the Hawks had a terrible second half which included a couple of Bomb it Chika moments, and the Butchers ended up winning by 20. 3 points was not going to make the difference in this one.
Of course, how dumb the sim is with clock management makes it all the more special when a final drive does go all the way down the field.
Sailfish vs Otters. The undefeated Otters have a seven point lead, and just need to stop the Sailfish from driving 80 yards in 3:03. And with how consistently awful the sim is at clock management, there's no way they can lose this...
...right?
Honestly, I wish I had access to both team's locker rooms for this game. Because both were probably rioting during this drive. also because I deserved to be drafted over Bronko Mills and I will harp on that until the end of my career.
It started with an 8 yard run from Raphtalia, 2:42 left. Then, an 11 yard pass and a spike to stop the clock. Because Sim, this took 48 seconds for some reason. 1:54 left, and then an incomplete pass. 3rd and 10, just stop them here-and you went offside. 3rd and 5. 16 yard pass to Raphtalia, who takes it to the OCO 40, timeout, 1:21 on the clock. 8 yard pass to James Angler, timeout, 48 seconds left. Pass to Rayne Gordon, 14 yards, down at the OCO 18. Timeout. 17 seconds left, and by now OCO is sweating bullets. 1st down, pass dropped. 2nd down, pass falls incomplete. 10 seconds left on the clock now. 3rd down, Running Back runs for 2 yards up the gut. Game over.
Except not, because with triple zeros on the clock, there's apparently still time for one more play. Dexter Banks passes to James Angler, who ends up BEHIND THE DEFENSE! AND HE RUSHES IN FOR THE TOUCHDOWN! HIS ENTIRE TEAM MOBS HIM AS THEY CELEBRATE!
We've seen all sorts of incredible plays to keep the Sailfish alive in this game, pending the extra point by Jacob Small...
And he missed it.
If you learn one thing about the sim when you first watch it, you probably notice that its time management and aggressiveness is best described as the cross between Andy Reid and Jason Garrett with the competence of Hue Jackson. Part of this is that basically any pass play will have an extra 20 seconds or more taken off of the clock for no reason, even IF a timeout is used afterwards. This makes two minute drills agonizingly difficult in the sim, as in order to get down the field quickly you need to have a big pass play that will take 50 seconds off the clock if it goes 30 yards, or in some cases just end a game or a half outright when you needed just one more second that you DEFINITELY would have in a more accurate simulation, where the players know the meaning of the words "hurry up". And yesterday's week of games gave two very fun examples of how the hurry up offense is so agonizingly difficult in the sim.
Let's start with the one you may not be thinking about. Near the end of the first half of the Hawks vs the Butchers, the Hawks were down 20-14 and had the ball with 3 minutes left. However, they had two huge advantages in the 2 minute drill that not all teams have. For one, they didn't need a touchdown in this situation, and could opt for a field goal past the 30 or so yard line. The other advantage is that a poor kick and a decent return had the Hawks begin the drive at their own 36. Of course, the way the sim works, a 7 yard completion and a 5 yard run take over a minute off the clock, and they hadn't even crossed midfield yet. Then, a 22 yard completion to Doug Howlett and a timeout! Straight to the Chicago 30, well within field goal range, and they even had 1:35 before the play began! They still had time. Of course, even with timeouts, the clock is stupid, and thus it immediately dropped to 55 seconds. Another 5 yard pass and a timeout took 18 seconds off the clock, they were at the 25 with 37 seconds left. Time for one more play. And that one play? A 14 yard run right to the Butchers 11, right in range for the Field Goal to pull them within 3 with an entire second half to play.
They did not get the kick off. For some reason, they didn't even take a timeout. Maybe the game's logic said that the play would take all 37 seconds? They definitely had a timeout left, though honestly I'm pretty sure I've seen NFL kickers line up and kick a field goal in like 11 seconds and in my opinion there should have been at least 20 left on the clock even without a timeout. But, the sim is gonna sim, and the Hawks miss out on 3 points. Even more annoying, even the extremely conservative sim will normally kick from the 25, but I guess the 37 seconds were too much for it to decide to kick on that play.
Would this have mattered in the end? Probably not, the Hawks had a terrible second half which included a couple of Bomb it Chika moments, and the Butchers ended up winning by 20. 3 points was not going to make the difference in this one.
Of course, how dumb the sim is with clock management makes it all the more special when a final drive does go all the way down the field.
Sailfish vs Otters. The undefeated Otters have a seven point lead, and just need to stop the Sailfish from driving 80 yards in 3:03. And with how consistently awful the sim is at clock management, there's no way they can lose this...
...right?
Honestly, I wish I had access to both team's locker rooms for this game. Because both were probably rioting during this drive. also because I deserved to be drafted over Bronko Mills and I will harp on that until the end of my career.
It started with an 8 yard run from Raphtalia, 2:42 left. Then, an 11 yard pass and a spike to stop the clock. Because Sim, this took 48 seconds for some reason. 1:54 left, and then an incomplete pass. 3rd and 10, just stop them here-and you went offside. 3rd and 5. 16 yard pass to Raphtalia, who takes it to the OCO 40, timeout, 1:21 on the clock. 8 yard pass to James Angler, timeout, 48 seconds left. Pass to Rayne Gordon, 14 yards, down at the OCO 18. Timeout. 17 seconds left, and by now OCO is sweating bullets. 1st down, pass dropped. 2nd down, pass falls incomplete. 10 seconds left on the clock now. 3rd down, Running Back runs for 2 yards up the gut. Game over.
Except not, because with triple zeros on the clock, there's apparently still time for one more play. Dexter Banks passes to James Angler, who ends up BEHIND THE DEFENSE! AND HE RUSHES IN FOR THE TOUCHDOWN! HIS ENTIRE TEAM MOBS HIM AS THEY CELEBRATE!
We've seen all sorts of incredible plays to keep the Sailfish alive in this game, pending the extra point by Jacob Small...
And he missed it.