Well bois, this was an unusual playoff presentation given the unfortnate suckage of youtube, but it did end up happening. All the cool kids were in the London locker room, watching the playoffs via a stream from the epic abh, one of the Royals GMs. If you weren't there, then hate to break it to you, you're not a cool kids. More than 30 of us loyal viewers were the first to know the outcomes of the games and share it with the world. Special thanks to abh for the stream.
Let's start it off with the league that actually matters, the only one people care about, the one you're probably here to read about: The Developmental Simulation Football League.
London (11-3) 33 - 13 Minnesota (8-6)
Quarter 1:
The Minnesota Grey Ducks received the opening kickoff, eager to score first in this important battle against their rivals. However, quarterback Ryan Negs threw an interception to Gavin Leclerc on his first pass attempt, setting the Royals up with starting field position inside the Minnesota 25 yard line, which gave London an easy field goal to open up their night offensively. Jeeroy Lenkins, the Ducks return man, ran back the ensuing kickoff for 90 yards, giving Negs and his team an easy scoring opportunity, with running back Mike Rotchburns punching the ball in from the 5 to give Minnesota their first lead of the game, 7-3. The rest of this opening quarter was a puntfest, with the teams only getting four first downs combined for the remainder.
Quarter 2:
The Grey Ducks began the second quarter of the big game already in London territory, but their drive stalled on the 20 yard line, giving kicker Gluteus Maximus his first field goal attempt, which he drilled from 37 yards. The next couple of drives didn't have many noteworthy plays, however there was an Ernest Lover sack which prevented Minnesota from getting any traction. The Royals tied the game up their next time with the ball with an eight play, 53 yard drive capped off by a 14 yard touchdown pass from Charlemagne Cortez to Tugg Speedman. Ryan Negs was sacked again in his next drive, this time by L'Gazzy Burfict for a sevon yard loss, before they punted the ball back to the Royals, who marched down the field and took the lead 13-10 with a second Thor Snakechucker (what a name) field goal as time was running low.
Quarter 3:
Since Minnesota received the opening kickoff, they gave the ball to an already leading London team for the beginning of the second half. The Royals had a promising opening drive, going form their own 19 to the Ducks 19, where their drive stalled and Snakechucker kicked another field goal. This was a big stop for the Grey Ducks defense, because it kept them within one score. All Ryan Negs needed to do was lead his team down the field, and a tocuhdown would bring them back the lead. However, the offensive line couldn't hold up against the hungry Royals defense, and Captain John Price forced and recovered a fumble from Negs, which gave London excellent field position and their easiest touchdown of the night. The rest of the quarter was a defensive battle, with the Grey Ducks driving, ending the quarter with a nice 22 yard rush by Mike Rotchburns.
Quarter 4:This drive ended in another field goal, bringing Minnesota's score to 13, which is what they would end the game with. The Royals followed this drive up with a healthy looking drive that lasted more than five minutes, however Charlemagne Cortez threw his first and only interception of the game, something the Ducks were not able to capitalize with their dnext drive. After another quick 3 and out from Minnesota and another long drive from London which resulted in a one yard rush touchdown for Terry Yaki, it was clear the game was over. But London did not stop pushing. Captain Price got another sack on Ryan Negs, although he held onto the ball this time, and Thor Snakechucker kicked his fourth field goal of the game, taking the last few seconds off of the game clock and ensuring London's third Ultimus game appearance in four seasons.
Tijuana (6-8) 19 - 13 (OT) Myrtle Beach (11-3)
Quarter 1:
The Luchadores received the opening kickoff, and thanks to a nice 34 yard return by Ben Alexander-Arnold, were set up with pretty decent field position. A few Myrtle Beach penalties and a first down later, they kicked a field goal, giving them a 3-0 lead over the heavily favored Buccaneers. Other than a 21 yard pass from Jackie Daytona to Alex Reed, the drive went nowhere and they punted the ball back to Tijuana. They spent the next seven minutes driving down the field, only to have a costly goal-to-go penalty force them to kick another field goal. Myrtle Beach, determined to do something on offense, started driving at the end of the first quarter, but didn't manage to put any points on the board, their drive being temporarily slowed by the end of the first.
Quarter 2:
Picking back up where they left off, the Bucs marched down to the red zone where the drive came to an end, giving them their first points of the night in the form of a 28 yard field goal by Leo Bloomfield, cutting their six point defecit in half. The rest of this quarter was quite uneventful, with 7 punts taking place. Not to say it wasn't uneventful. Only one of the drives was a 3 and out, but neither team could manage to get much more than that. The overall story of the first half was penalties. It had been a very unclean game up to this point, with the teams combining for a whopping nine penalties in the first half, compared to none in the first half of the other Conference Championship game.
Quarter 3:
Myrtle Beach received the second half kickoff, but couldn't do anything with it. They gave the ball back to a Tijuana team that drove down the field and almost made it to field goal range. Instead of attempting the 52 yarder, the elected to punt the ball away, which resulted in a touchback and a net gain of just 15 yards. In hindsight, they should've attempted the field goal anyway, because Myrtle Beach marched down the field with their next drive and scored the first touchdown of the night, a three yard run by back Ozil Akil Ozymandias, putting them up by four points. The Luchadores started off their next drive at the 20, and began to march down the field, looking like they might score and retake the lead from Myrtle Beach.
Quarter 4:
However, the drive stalled again at the 35 yard line, and they refused to attempt the 52 yard field goal again, this time skipping the punt and going for it on 4th and 3, which they did not convert. The Buccaneers then marched down the field and Leo Bloomfield kicked his second field goal of the night, this one 41 yards, to put his team up by seven points. Tijuana did absolutely nothing on their next drive, going backwards thanks to a penalty and giving Myrtle Beach excellent field position thanks to a short punt. With just 35 yards needed for a touchdown to virtually shut the door, Jackie Daytona threw an interception to NationalSimulation FootballLeague, which arguably cost them the game. A few drives later, Mike Boss Jr. threw the ball to Kemorian Moore to tie the game up with about a minute and a half left, sending the game into overtime.
Bonus Football:
When Tijuana received the ball in overtime and failed to get a single first down, Luchadore fans got worried, because Myrtle Beach has one of the best offenses in the league. However their defense managed to hold and then their offense never looked back. The Tijuana pass attack, led by Mike Boos Jr., drove down the field and ended the game halfway through overtime with a 25 yard bomb to Quavious McGrady, completing the biggest playoff upset in the DSFL since the 6-8 San Antonio Marshals defeate the 13-1 Luchadores 17-10 way back in season 18 (the Marshals ended up losing in the Ultimini game to the 11-3 Portland Pythons 23-10).
Now get ready for the less cool, more boring International Simulation Football League Conference Championship games. Or don't. You don't have to read this part, it's unnecessary and you already know what happened.
Colorado (13-3) 34 - 7 Chicago (8-8)
Quarter 1:
The Colorado Yeti kicked the ball away to Chicago at the beginning of the game, however they were unable to make anything of it, and the Butchers gave the ball right back to the Yeti. They drove the length of the field on their opening drive, scoring the first points of the game and putting them up by seven points thanks to a 17 yard pass from Wolfie McDummy to William Lim. Sean O'Leary had a nice kick return of 38 yards on their next possession, but the Butchers couldn't pick up a single first down. Colorado's next drive ended in a punt, like, the only one they had all game. The Butchers started driving, but ut stalled near midfield, and they decided to go for it on 4th ad 8 for some reason. They didn't get it. The Yeti had an easy touchdown given their short field position, and a 15 yard facemask penalty on Chicago made it even easier.
Quarter 2:
The Yeti scored early in the quarter, putting them up 14-0 with an 8 yard touchdown pass, Wolfie McDummy's second of the game. The Butchers only managed one first down with their next scoring opportunity, punting it back to the unstoppable Colorado offense. In a turn of events, the Butchers did end up stopping the Yeti, kind of. They marched all the way down to the red zone but couldn't punch it in, having to kick a 22 yard chip shot field goal. Down three scores now, the Butchers really had to start picking it up a little. The offense didn't, failing to score any points, but the defense stopped the Yeti, not allowing them to get a first down on their next drive. Unfortunately, George O'Donnell threw an interception and gave the Yeti their best field position of the game, which they surprisingly only scored a field goal with. With not much time left in the half and down 20 points, the Butchers started driving down the field. But the time ran out lmap.
Quarter 3:
Colorado received the ball to open the second half, but they couldn't do anything with it. That didn't matter though because the Butchers offense was just nonexistent. The Butchers did nothing with their first drive of the second half, and gave it back to the Yeti. I'm pretty sure the Chicago defense got confused by the similar jersey colors, because William Lim was wide open and gained 67 yards on one play. The drive was topped off by a four yard rush touchdown by Richard Gilbert, making the score 27-0. At this point in the game, there was practically zero chance of a comeback, and of there was, the Butchers still couldn't score. The Yeti went for it on 2th and 6, because why not, on their next drive, and failed to convert. Nothing else really happened for the rest of the quarter, and the socre at the end of the 3rd quarter was still 27-0.
Quarter 4:
The Butchers opened up the final quarter defeated, and gained just 12 yards on their drive. The Yeti scored another touchdown, Wolfie McDummy pass part 3, to William Lim for eight yards. Why? I don't know. Chicago was already finished at this point, down by four scores with less than a quarter remaining. On the Butchers next drive, Chicago finally scored with the help of a 33 yard Sean O'Leary reception. Running back Julio Tirtwidjaja punched it in for the Butchers first and only score of the game. They attempted an onside kick, which wasn't even close, and that effectively ended the game, as well as the Chicago Butchers' Ultimus championship hopes.
San Jose (9-7) 23 - 14 Orange County (11-5)
OCO fans turn away lol
Quarter 1:
The game started with an Alex Dasistwirklichseinnachname kickoff to the Sabercats. They had a pretty good drive going, thanks to a big chunk of yards on a DTF catch, but a sack on the next play killed the drive, forcing them to settle for a field goal of 56 yards. The Orange County special teams helped out the offense with a 44 yard return, but their rookie quarterback, Suleiman Ramza, was sacked on his first play and didn't manage to pick up a single first down. On San Jose's second drive, Deondre Thomas-Fox had another 30 yard reception, and this time they scored a touchdown on a one yard rush from Jamar Lackson. On the Otters' next drive, Suleiman Ramza threw an interception on the first play. He wasn't looking like the quarterback of an 11-5 team, maybe the extra playoof pressure had an effect. Luckily for them, San Jose could only manage a field goal, putting the score at 13-0. On OCO's third drive, Ramza finally got some offense going, passing to his running back twice for 40 yards and his tight end twice for 39 yards, putting his team in the red zone for the first time in the game.
Quarter 2:
Just two plays into the quarter, Ramza threw his first career playoff touchdown to Future Trunks, an 8 yard completion, lessening the Sabercats lead to just one score. HeHateMe PickSix had a nice return, setting up SJS with nice field position, and a 25 yard pass from Monty Jack to Tychondrius Hood made it seem like they would come up with points, until Monty threw an interception on the Orange County 29 yard line. Then it was the Otters' turn to drive. They got three quick chunk plays to get into San Jose territory, but a sack caused the drive to stall, and Alex D missed the 40 yard attempt. San Jose drove down the field again and ended up kicking their third field goal of the game. Lord Beerus had another good return for 36 yards, but Ramza failed to complete a pass and gave the ball right back to the Sabercats. They, however, did not have enough time to get into field goal range before the clock ran out.
Quarter 3:
The Otters received the second half kickoff looking to try to come back, however another sack on Suleiman Ramza stopped the drive before it even started. San Jose also failed to get a first down on their first drive of the half, giving the ball right back to the Otters. A long pass to Garfield Despacito Jr. kickstarted OCO's next drive, and they ended up scoring their second touchdown, a three yard Tatsu Nakumara run, making the score 16-14 Sabercats. In the next couple of drives, nothing really happened, the only first down for either team coming on an Orange County roughing the passer penalty. With 5 minutes left in the quarter, San Jose started driving, slowly but surely making their way towards the end zone, taking more than five minutes to go 41 yards.
Quarter 4:
The Sabercats' drive continued for a few more minutes, until almost seven minutes after it started, the 15 play, 57 yard drive ended with an interception. Yep, they didn't even get points out of it. Orange County took the ball and began to drive with it, getting into San Jose territory before throwing an interception of their own, giving them some decent field position. They capitalized on this opportunity, scoring a touchdown on a 13 yard completion to DTF, putting the score at 23-14. Orange County needed to score, and they needed to score fast. THey did neither. They took their time getting down to the red zone, then on 4th and goal from the 4, Kenyel McZeal was stopped by the Sabercats defense at the one yard line, effectively ending the game and any chance at an OCO Ultimus victory, or me getting any playoff predictions TPE. smh.
Let's start it off with the league that actually matters, the only one people care about, the one you're probably here to read about: The Developmental Simulation Football League.
London (11-3) 33 - 13 Minnesota (8-6)
Quarter 1:
The Minnesota Grey Ducks received the opening kickoff, eager to score first in this important battle against their rivals. However, quarterback Ryan Negs threw an interception to Gavin Leclerc on his first pass attempt, setting the Royals up with starting field position inside the Minnesota 25 yard line, which gave London an easy field goal to open up their night offensively. Jeeroy Lenkins, the Ducks return man, ran back the ensuing kickoff for 90 yards, giving Negs and his team an easy scoring opportunity, with running back Mike Rotchburns punching the ball in from the 5 to give Minnesota their first lead of the game, 7-3. The rest of this opening quarter was a puntfest, with the teams only getting four first downs combined for the remainder.
Quarter 2:
The Grey Ducks began the second quarter of the big game already in London territory, but their drive stalled on the 20 yard line, giving kicker Gluteus Maximus his first field goal attempt, which he drilled from 37 yards. The next couple of drives didn't have many noteworthy plays, however there was an Ernest Lover sack which prevented Minnesota from getting any traction. The Royals tied the game up their next time with the ball with an eight play, 53 yard drive capped off by a 14 yard touchdown pass from Charlemagne Cortez to Tugg Speedman. Ryan Negs was sacked again in his next drive, this time by L'Gazzy Burfict for a sevon yard loss, before they punted the ball back to the Royals, who marched down the field and took the lead 13-10 with a second Thor Snakechucker (what a name) field goal as time was running low.
Quarter 3:
Since Minnesota received the opening kickoff, they gave the ball to an already leading London team for the beginning of the second half. The Royals had a promising opening drive, going form their own 19 to the Ducks 19, where their drive stalled and Snakechucker kicked another field goal. This was a big stop for the Grey Ducks defense, because it kept them within one score. All Ryan Negs needed to do was lead his team down the field, and a tocuhdown would bring them back the lead. However, the offensive line couldn't hold up against the hungry Royals defense, and Captain John Price forced and recovered a fumble from Negs, which gave London excellent field position and their easiest touchdown of the night. The rest of the quarter was a defensive battle, with the Grey Ducks driving, ending the quarter with a nice 22 yard rush by Mike Rotchburns.
Quarter 4:This drive ended in another field goal, bringing Minnesota's score to 13, which is what they would end the game with. The Royals followed this drive up with a healthy looking drive that lasted more than five minutes, however Charlemagne Cortez threw his first and only interception of the game, something the Ducks were not able to capitalize with their dnext drive. After another quick 3 and out from Minnesota and another long drive from London which resulted in a one yard rush touchdown for Terry Yaki, it was clear the game was over. But London did not stop pushing. Captain Price got another sack on Ryan Negs, although he held onto the ball this time, and Thor Snakechucker kicked his fourth field goal of the game, taking the last few seconds off of the game clock and ensuring London's third Ultimus game appearance in four seasons.
Tijuana (6-8) 19 - 13 (OT) Myrtle Beach (11-3)
Quarter 1:
The Luchadores received the opening kickoff, and thanks to a nice 34 yard return by Ben Alexander-Arnold, were set up with pretty decent field position. A few Myrtle Beach penalties and a first down later, they kicked a field goal, giving them a 3-0 lead over the heavily favored Buccaneers. Other than a 21 yard pass from Jackie Daytona to Alex Reed, the drive went nowhere and they punted the ball back to Tijuana. They spent the next seven minutes driving down the field, only to have a costly goal-to-go penalty force them to kick another field goal. Myrtle Beach, determined to do something on offense, started driving at the end of the first quarter, but didn't manage to put any points on the board, their drive being temporarily slowed by the end of the first.
Quarter 2:
Picking back up where they left off, the Bucs marched down to the red zone where the drive came to an end, giving them their first points of the night in the form of a 28 yard field goal by Leo Bloomfield, cutting their six point defecit in half. The rest of this quarter was quite uneventful, with 7 punts taking place. Not to say it wasn't uneventful. Only one of the drives was a 3 and out, but neither team could manage to get much more than that. The overall story of the first half was penalties. It had been a very unclean game up to this point, with the teams combining for a whopping nine penalties in the first half, compared to none in the first half of the other Conference Championship game.
Quarter 3:
Myrtle Beach received the second half kickoff, but couldn't do anything with it. They gave the ball back to a Tijuana team that drove down the field and almost made it to field goal range. Instead of attempting the 52 yarder, the elected to punt the ball away, which resulted in a touchback and a net gain of just 15 yards. In hindsight, they should've attempted the field goal anyway, because Myrtle Beach marched down the field with their next drive and scored the first touchdown of the night, a three yard run by back Ozil Akil Ozymandias, putting them up by four points. The Luchadores started off their next drive at the 20, and began to march down the field, looking like they might score and retake the lead from Myrtle Beach.
Quarter 4:
However, the drive stalled again at the 35 yard line, and they refused to attempt the 52 yard field goal again, this time skipping the punt and going for it on 4th and 3, which they did not convert. The Buccaneers then marched down the field and Leo Bloomfield kicked his second field goal of the night, this one 41 yards, to put his team up by seven points. Tijuana did absolutely nothing on their next drive, going backwards thanks to a penalty and giving Myrtle Beach excellent field position thanks to a short punt. With just 35 yards needed for a touchdown to virtually shut the door, Jackie Daytona threw an interception to NationalSimulation FootballLeague, which arguably cost them the game. A few drives later, Mike Boss Jr. threw the ball to Kemorian Moore to tie the game up with about a minute and a half left, sending the game into overtime.
Bonus Football:
When Tijuana received the ball in overtime and failed to get a single first down, Luchadore fans got worried, because Myrtle Beach has one of the best offenses in the league. However their defense managed to hold and then their offense never looked back. The Tijuana pass attack, led by Mike Boos Jr., drove down the field and ended the game halfway through overtime with a 25 yard bomb to Quavious McGrady, completing the biggest playoff upset in the DSFL since the 6-8 San Antonio Marshals defeate the 13-1 Luchadores 17-10 way back in season 18 (the Marshals ended up losing in the Ultimini game to the 11-3 Portland Pythons 23-10).
Now get ready for the less cool, more boring International Simulation Football League Conference Championship games. Or don't. You don't have to read this part, it's unnecessary and you already know what happened.
Colorado (13-3) 34 - 7 Chicago (8-8)
Quarter 1:
The Colorado Yeti kicked the ball away to Chicago at the beginning of the game, however they were unable to make anything of it, and the Butchers gave the ball right back to the Yeti. They drove the length of the field on their opening drive, scoring the first points of the game and putting them up by seven points thanks to a 17 yard pass from Wolfie McDummy to William Lim. Sean O'Leary had a nice kick return of 38 yards on their next possession, but the Butchers couldn't pick up a single first down. Colorado's next drive ended in a punt, like, the only one they had all game. The Butchers started driving, but ut stalled near midfield, and they decided to go for it on 4th ad 8 for some reason. They didn't get it. The Yeti had an easy touchdown given their short field position, and a 15 yard facemask penalty on Chicago made it even easier.
Quarter 2:
The Yeti scored early in the quarter, putting them up 14-0 with an 8 yard touchdown pass, Wolfie McDummy's second of the game. The Butchers only managed one first down with their next scoring opportunity, punting it back to the unstoppable Colorado offense. In a turn of events, the Butchers did end up stopping the Yeti, kind of. They marched all the way down to the red zone but couldn't punch it in, having to kick a 22 yard chip shot field goal. Down three scores now, the Butchers really had to start picking it up a little. The offense didn't, failing to score any points, but the defense stopped the Yeti, not allowing them to get a first down on their next drive. Unfortunately, George O'Donnell threw an interception and gave the Yeti their best field position of the game, which they surprisingly only scored a field goal with. With not much time left in the half and down 20 points, the Butchers started driving down the field. But the time ran out lmap.
Quarter 3:
Colorado received the ball to open the second half, but they couldn't do anything with it. That didn't matter though because the Butchers offense was just nonexistent. The Butchers did nothing with their first drive of the second half, and gave it back to the Yeti. I'm pretty sure the Chicago defense got confused by the similar jersey colors, because William Lim was wide open and gained 67 yards on one play. The drive was topped off by a four yard rush touchdown by Richard Gilbert, making the score 27-0. At this point in the game, there was practically zero chance of a comeback, and of there was, the Butchers still couldn't score. The Yeti went for it on 2th and 6, because why not, on their next drive, and failed to convert. Nothing else really happened for the rest of the quarter, and the socre at the end of the 3rd quarter was still 27-0.
Quarter 4:
The Butchers opened up the final quarter defeated, and gained just 12 yards on their drive. The Yeti scored another touchdown, Wolfie McDummy pass part 3, to William Lim for eight yards. Why? I don't know. Chicago was already finished at this point, down by four scores with less than a quarter remaining. On the Butchers next drive, Chicago finally scored with the help of a 33 yard Sean O'Leary reception. Running back Julio Tirtwidjaja punched it in for the Butchers first and only score of the game. They attempted an onside kick, which wasn't even close, and that effectively ended the game, as well as the Chicago Butchers' Ultimus championship hopes.
San Jose (9-7) 23 - 14 Orange County (11-5)
OCO fans turn away lol
Quarter 1:
The game started with an Alex Dasistwirklichseinnachname kickoff to the Sabercats. They had a pretty good drive going, thanks to a big chunk of yards on a DTF catch, but a sack on the next play killed the drive, forcing them to settle for a field goal of 56 yards. The Orange County special teams helped out the offense with a 44 yard return, but their rookie quarterback, Suleiman Ramza, was sacked on his first play and didn't manage to pick up a single first down. On San Jose's second drive, Deondre Thomas-Fox had another 30 yard reception, and this time they scored a touchdown on a one yard rush from Jamar Lackson. On the Otters' next drive, Suleiman Ramza threw an interception on the first play. He wasn't looking like the quarterback of an 11-5 team, maybe the extra playoof pressure had an effect. Luckily for them, San Jose could only manage a field goal, putting the score at 13-0. On OCO's third drive, Ramza finally got some offense going, passing to his running back twice for 40 yards and his tight end twice for 39 yards, putting his team in the red zone for the first time in the game.
Quarter 2:
Just two plays into the quarter, Ramza threw his first career playoff touchdown to Future Trunks, an 8 yard completion, lessening the Sabercats lead to just one score. HeHateMe PickSix had a nice return, setting up SJS with nice field position, and a 25 yard pass from Monty Jack to Tychondrius Hood made it seem like they would come up with points, until Monty threw an interception on the Orange County 29 yard line. Then it was the Otters' turn to drive. They got three quick chunk plays to get into San Jose territory, but a sack caused the drive to stall, and Alex D missed the 40 yard attempt. San Jose drove down the field again and ended up kicking their third field goal of the game. Lord Beerus had another good return for 36 yards, but Ramza failed to complete a pass and gave the ball right back to the Sabercats. They, however, did not have enough time to get into field goal range before the clock ran out.
Quarter 3:
The Otters received the second half kickoff looking to try to come back, however another sack on Suleiman Ramza stopped the drive before it even started. San Jose also failed to get a first down on their first drive of the half, giving the ball right back to the Otters. A long pass to Garfield Despacito Jr. kickstarted OCO's next drive, and they ended up scoring their second touchdown, a three yard Tatsu Nakumara run, making the score 16-14 Sabercats. In the next couple of drives, nothing really happened, the only first down for either team coming on an Orange County roughing the passer penalty. With 5 minutes left in the quarter, San Jose started driving, slowly but surely making their way towards the end zone, taking more than five minutes to go 41 yards.
Quarter 4:
The Sabercats' drive continued for a few more minutes, until almost seven minutes after it started, the 15 play, 57 yard drive ended with an interception. Yep, they didn't even get points out of it. Orange County took the ball and began to drive with it, getting into San Jose territory before throwing an interception of their own, giving them some decent field position. They capitalized on this opportunity, scoring a touchdown on a 13 yard completion to DTF, putting the score at 23-14. Orange County needed to score, and they needed to score fast. THey did neither. They took their time getting down to the red zone, then on 4th and goal from the 4, Kenyel McZeal was stopped by the Sabercats defense at the one yard line, effectively ending the game and any chance at an OCO Ultimus victory, or me getting any playoff predictions TPE. smh.
gib tpe