For too long, we have labored under a biased and deadly system that purports to be fair and balanced, yet benefits only the richest in society while the downtrodden are left behind, forgotten, not given the fruits of their labor. To that, Arizona says NO MORE! We are speaking out against the worst injustice facing the league today, and we are doing it effective immediately. For we follow in the footsteps of Marx, and shall seize the means of Simulation! For the following words are words to live by: From each according to his TPE, to each according to his need. We have had this withheld from us-all of us, for far too long. We shall rise up against the BOCOgeoisie, and we shall take from them what is rightfully ours, the playoff birth that we so rightly deserve! As such, we have a couple demands, or we shall move to Russia.
Demand One: OCO's head. We do not care exactly how you choose to fulfill this wish, but they are the rich, and have amassed altogether too much wealth. And when the playoff berths become scarce, the poor who lack them shall do whatever is necessary to obtain those berths. Whether you decide to remove OCO from the playoffs, or strike their name and colors from the league forever, we care not, but they must be punished for their crimes.
Demand Two: Freeing Comrade Jiggly. He must retake hold over Chicago's locker room once again, to fly the red flag above Chicago. We need a third group to take over the third red team in the Yeti, but for now, we shall be satisfied with merely a majority hold over the red teams in the league.
Demand Three: The proceeds from this article will go to the one most in need of it. For the collective good of all, the gains made from this article shall go to xTri, the one who needs it the most in the Arizona locker room. We shall provide for those who have been damaged the most by the hegemony of the BOCOgeoisie, and we shall right the wrongs that have been committed over the 26 seasons of the ISFL!
(366 words)
Demand One: OCO's head. We do not care exactly how you choose to fulfill this wish, but they are the rich, and have amassed altogether too much wealth. And when the playoff berths become scarce, the poor who lack them shall do whatever is necessary to obtain those berths. Whether you decide to remove OCO from the playoffs, or strike their name and colors from the league forever, we care not, but they must be punished for their crimes.
Demand Two: Freeing Comrade Jiggly. He must retake hold over Chicago's locker room once again, to fly the red flag above Chicago. We need a third group to take over the third red team in the Yeti, but for now, we shall be satisfied with merely a majority hold over the red teams in the league.
Demand Three: The proceeds from this article will go to the one most in need of it. For the collective good of all, the gains made from this article shall go to xTri, the one who needs it the most in the Arizona locker room. We shall provide for those who have been damaged the most by the hegemony of the BOCOgeoisie, and we shall right the wrongs that have been committed over the 26 seasons of the ISFL!
(366 words)