Quenton Bode steps up to the podium.
"Thank you all for coming today. Well this is about as bad an ending to a season as you can get. But I'm proud of my team for making it this far, and I'm confident that we'll be back in the Ultimus before you know it. With that, let's get to some questions."
Of all your Hall of Fame achievements, which is the one you're most happy about? --AdamS
"Well I don't know about calling them 'Hall of Fame achievements,' for starters. I haven't been voted into the hall yet, and no matter what anyone -- myself included -- might say about my resume, nothing is guaranteed. So I certainly appreciate the vote of confidence, but until I've actually been inducted, I don't really want to place my accomplishments on that level. All that being said, I am happy about a few of my records. The all-time tackles record is huge, obviously, and I'm still amazed that I was the first player to record 1400-plus tackles. It'll be quite a long shot, but with any luck I'll be able to reach 1500 tackles in Season 27, which would just blow my mind. I'm also really proud of my place on the all-time forced fumbles and fumbles recovered lists: I'm second in forced fumbles and tied for third in fumbles recovered. There have been a lot of great defenders in the history of the league, and forcing turnovers is a huge part of being successful on defense. So the fact that I'm so high on both of those lists is amazing. I'd love to climb higher on those lists, but that will also be a bit of a strech. I'm certainly not getting any younger, and I'm not going to see the field as much next season, so my chances will be much more limited. But if I never played another down of football, I'd be proud of those records. When I first came into the league, my dream was to retire having left my mark on it. I feel like I've done that."
The league has officially been the International Simulation Football League long enough now that I do not tend to misspell it or improperly remember it. Given that we could see a team on every continent soon, however that brings me to a unique question given your heritage. Since Antarctica means opposite to the Arctic, and Arctic originates in part from Arktos meaning bear; do you think you would boycott any games in Antarctica as being opposite to your existence? Would you want to rise above the division instead and play? Perhaps go a step further and boycott the very idea of a team in Antarctica? --Tesla
"There are a few scenarios where I could see myself boycotting games, but having to play in Antarctica isn't one of them. I don't hold any grudge against Antarctica, just because that's not where my people and I come from. And honestly, I love the idea of basing a team in Antarctica. Hell, I love the idea of basing more teams in locations outside the U.S., or at least outside the North American continent. Right now we have, what, two ISFL teams not in America? I'd love to see more franchises in other locations. The DSFL has proven that those locations are viable: we have teams in London, Tijuana, and Sydney. So why can't the ISFL do the same thing? If we're going to be a truly international league, like our new name claims, we need to be international. Let's get a franchise in Asia or Africa or yes, even Antarctica. There are so many opportunities out there to expand the league and the brand and the game of football, and we haven't taken advantage of that at all. So to answer your questions more succinctly, I would not boycott any games in Antarctica, and I fully support the idea of expanding the league to Antarctica, and other continents as well."
Did you know that the original naming of bears has theoretically been lost to history as humans feared that speaking their name would summon them, and thus came up with an alternative name in the hopes that they could be talked about without being summoned? That now leading to what we call bears. --Tesla
"I did not know that! That's quite an interesting fact. You know they say that the key to staying young is to learn something new every day, so I'll count this as my new thing today. Thank you!"
Extending from question two would you say that bears are eldritch abominations that are just holding back their real power? (You can tell me I promise to keep it hush hush.) --Tesla
"On the record, of course not. We're just normal beings, no different than any other animal, and not all that different from humans really." Bode quickly glances around to make sure no one else is listening, then leans in and speaks in a conspiratorial whisper: "But if you want to know the real story, let's talk later, off the record."
Polar bears are the largest species of bear overall and one would think would make ideal line players. You instead chose to play linebacker and have had what I consider to be a Hall of Fame career at the position. That said do you think a different species of bear would have better natural aptitude for the position? If so is there a particular variant that you think would be the best suited to the position? (If anything I think this should speak in your favor for the Hall of Fame as you were not playing a position built to favor your natural abilities.) --Tesla
"Well thank you for the kind words. As I've said, I don't like to think of myself as a Hall of Fame player just yet, but I do appreciate the compliment. As for your question, I think some varieties of the American black bear would make excellent linebackers. They're relatively small, quick on their feet, and are equal parts strong and dexterous. I think they'd make great linebackers. But I would agree that all of us would make excellent linemen. I've spoken to several bears, polar bears and other kinds, that have shown interest in playing as both offensive and defensive linemen in the ISFL. So I'm excited to see what the future of football holds for bears of all kinds."
The engine that runs our reality will be changing going into next season which is projected to be your last. Given how other players last year has gone in the past; do you think yours will be better or worse off because of the new engine? --Tesla
"Well, if it was just the fundamental altering of our entire reality, I'd be tempted to say that I have no idea. It's hard to tell how events like that can affect one's performance, so I wouldn't try to predict anything. But honestly, with it being my final season on top of all of that, I'm trying to keep my expectations realistic. I'm not the same bear I was when I came into the league: I'm old, and I can feel it on every play. My first step isn't as explosive, I don't hit quite as hard, and I get tired a hell of a lot faster. My training hasn't changed much; it's my body. But it happens to everyone eventually. I've known this was coming for a long time. Fortunately, I have a great organization behind me, and they're doing everything within their power to make sure I end my career on a high note. I mentioned this earlier, but next season -- for the first time in my ISFL career, and for the first time since I was a sophomore in college -- I'm not going to be starting. I'm going to be coming off the bench periodically, to give our younger linebackers some rest during those long drives. I'm hoping that I'll be able to make the most of my limited minutes. But like I said, if my career ended right now I'd be happy with how it had gone. Whatever else I get from here on out, as little as that might be, will be icing on the cake. So relative to other players' careers, my final season might be a lot worse on paper. But I'm just going to sit back, try to teach these young kids a thing or two, and just enjoy every single second of it."
"Thank you all for coming today. Well this is about as bad an ending to a season as you can get. But I'm proud of my team for making it this far, and I'm confident that we'll be back in the Ultimus before you know it. With that, let's get to some questions."
Of all your Hall of Fame achievements, which is the one you're most happy about? --AdamS
"Well I don't know about calling them 'Hall of Fame achievements,' for starters. I haven't been voted into the hall yet, and no matter what anyone -- myself included -- might say about my resume, nothing is guaranteed. So I certainly appreciate the vote of confidence, but until I've actually been inducted, I don't really want to place my accomplishments on that level. All that being said, I am happy about a few of my records. The all-time tackles record is huge, obviously, and I'm still amazed that I was the first player to record 1400-plus tackles. It'll be quite a long shot, but with any luck I'll be able to reach 1500 tackles in Season 27, which would just blow my mind. I'm also really proud of my place on the all-time forced fumbles and fumbles recovered lists: I'm second in forced fumbles and tied for third in fumbles recovered. There have been a lot of great defenders in the history of the league, and forcing turnovers is a huge part of being successful on defense. So the fact that I'm so high on both of those lists is amazing. I'd love to climb higher on those lists, but that will also be a bit of a strech. I'm certainly not getting any younger, and I'm not going to see the field as much next season, so my chances will be much more limited. But if I never played another down of football, I'd be proud of those records. When I first came into the league, my dream was to retire having left my mark on it. I feel like I've done that."
The league has officially been the International Simulation Football League long enough now that I do not tend to misspell it or improperly remember it. Given that we could see a team on every continent soon, however that brings me to a unique question given your heritage. Since Antarctica means opposite to the Arctic, and Arctic originates in part from Arktos meaning bear; do you think you would boycott any games in Antarctica as being opposite to your existence? Would you want to rise above the division instead and play? Perhaps go a step further and boycott the very idea of a team in Antarctica? --Tesla
"There are a few scenarios where I could see myself boycotting games, but having to play in Antarctica isn't one of them. I don't hold any grudge against Antarctica, just because that's not where my people and I come from. And honestly, I love the idea of basing a team in Antarctica. Hell, I love the idea of basing more teams in locations outside the U.S., or at least outside the North American continent. Right now we have, what, two ISFL teams not in America? I'd love to see more franchises in other locations. The DSFL has proven that those locations are viable: we have teams in London, Tijuana, and Sydney. So why can't the ISFL do the same thing? If we're going to be a truly international league, like our new name claims, we need to be international. Let's get a franchise in Asia or Africa or yes, even Antarctica. There are so many opportunities out there to expand the league and the brand and the game of football, and we haven't taken advantage of that at all. So to answer your questions more succinctly, I would not boycott any games in Antarctica, and I fully support the idea of expanding the league to Antarctica, and other continents as well."
Did you know that the original naming of bears has theoretically been lost to history as humans feared that speaking their name would summon them, and thus came up with an alternative name in the hopes that they could be talked about without being summoned? That now leading to what we call bears. --Tesla
"I did not know that! That's quite an interesting fact. You know they say that the key to staying young is to learn something new every day, so I'll count this as my new thing today. Thank you!"
Extending from question two would you say that bears are eldritch abominations that are just holding back their real power? (You can tell me I promise to keep it hush hush.) --Tesla
"On the record, of course not. We're just normal beings, no different than any other animal, and not all that different from humans really." Bode quickly glances around to make sure no one else is listening, then leans in and speaks in a conspiratorial whisper: "But if you want to know the real story, let's talk later, off the record."
Polar bears are the largest species of bear overall and one would think would make ideal line players. You instead chose to play linebacker and have had what I consider to be a Hall of Fame career at the position. That said do you think a different species of bear would have better natural aptitude for the position? If so is there a particular variant that you think would be the best suited to the position? (If anything I think this should speak in your favor for the Hall of Fame as you were not playing a position built to favor your natural abilities.) --Tesla
"Well thank you for the kind words. As I've said, I don't like to think of myself as a Hall of Fame player just yet, but I do appreciate the compliment. As for your question, I think some varieties of the American black bear would make excellent linebackers. They're relatively small, quick on their feet, and are equal parts strong and dexterous. I think they'd make great linebackers. But I would agree that all of us would make excellent linemen. I've spoken to several bears, polar bears and other kinds, that have shown interest in playing as both offensive and defensive linemen in the ISFL. So I'm excited to see what the future of football holds for bears of all kinds."
The engine that runs our reality will be changing going into next season which is projected to be your last. Given how other players last year has gone in the past; do you think yours will be better or worse off because of the new engine? --Tesla
"Well, if it was just the fundamental altering of our entire reality, I'd be tempted to say that I have no idea. It's hard to tell how events like that can affect one's performance, so I wouldn't try to predict anything. But honestly, with it being my final season on top of all of that, I'm trying to keep my expectations realistic. I'm not the same bear I was when I came into the league: I'm old, and I can feel it on every play. My first step isn't as explosive, I don't hit quite as hard, and I get tired a hell of a lot faster. My training hasn't changed much; it's my body. But it happens to everyone eventually. I've known this was coming for a long time. Fortunately, I have a great organization behind me, and they're doing everything within their power to make sure I end my career on a high note. I mentioned this earlier, but next season -- for the first time in my ISFL career, and for the first time since I was a sophomore in college -- I'm not going to be starting. I'm going to be coming off the bench periodically, to give our younger linebackers some rest during those long drives. I'm hoping that I'll be able to make the most of my limited minutes. But like I said, if my career ended right now I'd be happy with how it had gone. Whatever else I get from here on out, as little as that might be, will be icing on the cake. So relative to other players' careers, my final season might be a lot worse on paper. But I'm just going to sit back, try to teach these young kids a thing or two, and just enjoy every single second of it."