The NSFC had some very high highs and some very, very low lows. The ASFC from quickly looking at it seems deeper but also has some potential lows, and nothing really as high as the Butchers and Sailfish. Let's start the ball rolling.
Arizona Outlaws
ISFL Roster:
Pete "Plop" Miller, S21 DT (1340 TPE, 1st among DTs)
Tatsu Nakamura, S22 RB (1204 TPE, 3rd among RBs)
Desmond Scarlett, S20 CB (1192 TPE, 2nd among CBs)
Thomas Passmann, S22 WR (1016 TPE, 8th among WRs)
Wesley Eriksen, S22 S (968 TPE, 9th among S)
Galf Wilf, S20 LB (960 TPE, 10th among LBs)
Stanislaw Koniecpolski, S22 LB (954 TPE, 11th among LBs)
DB Jadakiss, S23 S (937 TPE, 10th among S)
Jay Cue, S18 OL (901 TPE, 5th among OLs)
Taro Raimon, S24 WR (871 TPE, 14th among WRs)
Gunnar Thorbjornsson, S24 RB (870 TPE, 11th among RBs)
Charlemagne Cortez, S24 QB (836 TPE, 13th among QBs)
Sandro Ryeu, S22 DE (827 TPE, 10th among DEs) (IA)
Calvin Golladay, S22 OL (768 TPE, 9th among OLs)
L'Gazzy Burfict, S25 LB (701 TPE, 20th among LBs)
Tayshawn Crunk, S25 CB (692 TPE, 22nd among CBs)
Darren Pama, S25 WR (691 TPE, 22nd among WRs)
Chuck Roth, S25 DT (683 TPE, 16th among DTs)
Logan Noble Jr, S21 DE (594 TPE, 17th among DEs) (IA)
Mason Gillion, S25 CB (540 TPE, 32nd among CBs)
Rigby Racoon, S23 TE (438 TPE, 13th among TEs) (IA)
Tom Teboat, S26 TE (424 TPE, 15th among TEs)
J. J. "Jay" Jay-Jaymison, S21 KR (414 TPE, 11th among KRs)
Saba Donut, S17 WR (412 TPE, 41st among WRs)
Mattress Cadaire, S24 OL (401 TPE, 29th among OLs) (IA)
DSFL Players:
Moe Skeeter, S26 S (391 TPE)
Logan Sarrasin, S26 LB (408 TPE)
Akili Ozymandias, S26 RB (308 TPE)
Bismo Funyuns, S26 WR (137 TPE)
Ferghus Callaghan Jr, S27 DT (257 TPE)
Cade York, S27 KR (180 TPE)
Daquan Madison, S27 DT (165 TPE)
Hey look, it's my team! And oh boy are we in win now mode, if the trade for Tatsu Nakamura in the offseason didn't make very clear. Unfortunately, our seasons mean we're kind of caught halfway in and halfway out of our window right now: We have a number of good season 24 and 25 players who are earning well, but are not world beaters yet (I include myself here) and we have a number of Season 21 or older players who are going to regress before we get there. As for current roster construction, we have a good linebacking group, a great pair of safeties, one of the better Wide Receiver groupings in the league, and the 2nd best running back duo in the league by quite a good ways. We also have a pretty decent OLine now that Cue has beefed up to join it. On the other side of the coin, we have a pretty weak defensive line outside of Pete Miller, and the 2nd lowest TPE quarterback in the league, with the only guy below him being the only guy younger than him. Granted, this isn't on the level of, say, Easton Cole last year, or Jackie Daytona this year, but in an all in season you want a guy with more than 850 TPE to start the season at QB. Still, the Outlaws are going to be a contender for the playoffs this year, with or without a top flight QB. As for regression, this team has already had quite a chunk taken out of it by regression and it's going to hurt even more for the next 2 years. Galf Wilf and Desmond Scarlett are going on their second season, and Wilf will probably no longer be elite after this season (Scarlett probably has one more). Cue and Donut are already deep into regression, with Cue probably functioning as a decent Olineman for one or two more seasons, and Donut going probably off of spite for Phillip Rivers at this point in time. As for season 21 players, Plop has probably 2 more seasons after regression to still be an elite player, although Logan Noble Jr definitely can't take even one season of regression. Season 22's regression will probably end up knocking out our inactive Season 22 player completely, although most of the rest of our Season 22 players can survive one or even 2 bouts with regression. As for replacements, we have 3 different Season 26 prospects with varying levels of earning, a likely kicker replacement, and another season 27 prospect. They'll probably replace the currently falling and about to fall season 21 and 20 players in the defense, along with some of our inactives about to regress. We also have Tom Teboat about to overtake Rigby Racoon and hopefully being a decent TE.
Austin Copperheads
ISFL Roster:
Troen Egghands, S22 DE (1225 TPE, 2nd among DEs)
Tyler Montain, S23 DT (1097 TPE, 7th among DTs)
Videl San, S23 WR (1049 TPE, 5th among WRs)
Dex Kennedy, S22 LB (1044 TPE, 7th among LBs)
Lesean Paris Crooks, S23 CB (919 TPE, 11th among CBs)
Zoe Watts, S24 RB (913 TPE, 10th among RBs)
Eddie Jeeta, S22 WR (906 TPE, 12th among WRs) (IA)
Brach Thomaslacher, S24 LB (896 TPE, 13th among LBs)
Maverick Bowie, S24 S (886 TPE, 13th among S)
Doug Howlett, S23 WR (828 TPE, 15th among WRs)
Slinky Claxton, S22 DE (796 TPE, 11th among DEs) (IA)
Griffin Porter, S23 LB (780 TPE, 18th among LBs) (IA)
Gregor MacGregor, S21 S (735 TPE, 18th among S)
Friedrich Vequain, S22 TE (674 TPE, 9th among TEs)
Jackie Daytona, S25 QB (673 TPE, 14th among QBs)
Kichwa Jones, S22 RB (545 TPE, 19th among RBs) (IA)
Tomage McGullager, S23 CB (523 TPE, 34th among CBs)
Connor Quigley, S25 OL (473 TPE, 24th among OLs)
Ben Alexander Arnold, S25 CB (392 TPE, 39th among CBs)
Owen Isaac, S25 DE (391 TPE, 31st among DEs)
Slurms McKenzie, S26 OL (359 TPE, 30th among OLs)
Jim the Vampire, S27 LB (354 TPE, 45th among LBs)
Leo Bloomfield, S25 KR (246 TPE, 14th among KRs)
DSFL Players:
Candice D. Fitinyoumouf, S27 DT (245 TPE)
Carter Fox, S27 DT (152 TPE)
Ty Tyson, S26 LB (198 TPE)
Gluteus Maximus, S26 KR (295 TPE)
Speaking of teams in win mode, here we have the other team who's going to be held back by its quarterback if anything. This is easily the best wideout group in the league, most of the teams don't have 2 receivers better than this group's #3, and Berlin and Honolulu don't even have a single receiver better than that #3, Doug Howlett. Their defensive line is absolutely monstrous, with 2 players over 1000 TPE on the line. Their 3rd linebacker has over 750 TPE...and then there's the flip side. Starting with having absolutely the worst QB in the ISFL, by about 150 TPE at this point. More concerning is that their own secondary falls off a cliff at some point, their safeties combining for just over 1600 TPE is OK, not great, and then their CB2 and CB3 combine for just over 800 TPE. There will be a couple massive holes in their team no matter what alignment they are in, as they don't have a deep enough linebacker core, secondary, or defensive line to not have to play at least 3 people below 550 TPE on every single play, with a couple below 400. Their last weakness is the offensive line, which has a 2nd player worse than most team's 3rd player. As for regression, this is probably the youngest team in the league. Their oldest players are Season 22 outside of a single season 21, and thus any talk of regression or replacements will be a bit much in the future speculation department. But I certainly can do that future speculation! This team has a 3 or 4 year window right now, about the time for its season 23 players to fall off, before it goes through a rebuild. Season 22's first regression will also give it a bit of a shock, Troen Egghands will survive that with flying colors and Dex Kennedy will probably still end up over 1000 TPE, but the inactive Jeeta will go from a great second option to a worthwhile 3rd option to practically useless by 2 regressions, and the similarly inactive Kichwa Jones will go from a below average 2nd string RB to useless after one regression. Slinky Claxton will still be serviceable after one regression to completely useless after 2. As for Gregor MacGregor, their only Season 21 player, he's only at 735 TPE, and although he seems to be active right now, starting from that point is not a good base to go on for fighting regression. He might be able to survive 2 if he stays active, but he certainly won't be a good player that 2nd season. The only season 22 active player who will probably survive one regression but not 2 is their Tight End with 674 TPE right now. Still, this roster is only going to be stronger next season and maybe even the season after that.
Honolulu Hahalua
ISFL Roster:
Shawn Dawkins, S22 S (1197 TPE, 2nd among S)
Ke'oke'o Kane-Maika'i, S22 DE (1093 TPE, 5th among DEs)
Venus Powers, S20 KR (1043 TPE, 2nd among KR)
Heinrich Kackpoo, S23 LB (1041 TPE, 8th among LBs)
Jim Waters, S22 CB (933 TPE, 10th among CBs)
Luke Skywalker, S22 QB (917 TPE, 10th among QBs) (IA) (Behold, the most damaging IA in the entire league!)
Asher Montain, S24 DE (831 TPE, 9th among DEs)
Jed Podolak, S19 WR (799 TPE, 18th among WRs)
Nicholas Ayers, S23 RB (791 TPE, 13th among RBs)
Davriel Lavigne, S25 S (705 TPE, 20th among S)
Guy Fields, S25 LB (702 TPE, 19th among LBs)
Ray Ray Jackson, S23 CB (657 TPE, 28th among CBs) (IA)
William Alexander, S22 WR (594 TPE, 32nd among WRs) (IA)
Ragnar Krashwagen, S24 TE (589 TPE, 11th among TEs)
Cobra Kai, S26 RB (554 TPE, 18th among RBs)
Cadillac Harris, S22 CB (535 TPE, 33rd among CB) (IA)
Bane Ka'ana'ana, S23 DT (483 TPE, 23rd among DTs) (IA)
Buck Thornton, S22 S (467 TPE, 32nd among S) (IA)
Richard Littlewood, S26 OL (427 TPE, 25th among OLs)
Tristian Hex, S22 RB (416 TPE, 25th among RBs)
Holden Summers, S21 LB (403 TPE, 43rd among LBs) (IA)
Ismael Sanchez, S22 DE (390 TPE, 33rd among DEs) (IA)
Momona Keiki-Kane, S22 DT (343 TPE, 24th among DTs) (IA)
DSFL Players:
Joilet Christ Jr, S27 QB (313 TPE)
Sirdsvaldis Miglaskems, S26 RB (222 TPE)
Alex Reed, S25 WR (291 TPE)
Lalo Salamanca, S26 WR (213 TPE)
Eleven Kendrick Watts, S27 WR (354 TPE)
Lionel Rumper, S25 S (315 TPE)
Pope Francis, S26 DE (177 TPE)
Jason Bradshaw, S27 CB (249 TPE)
From 2 teams who are a young QB away from securing Ultimus contender status, to the one team in the league who's probably punting on their Season 22 QB. And not that I can blame them considering he hasn't been on the forums for over a month at this point. Honolulu's in some really tough shape right now, but they do have one spot where I can confidently say they are the strongest team in the league: The Defensive End position. They also have a top 2 kicker by a pretty significant distance. They have good players on their defense, the problem is that their offense might be the worst in the league. It's certainly up there, with a QB who might fall to 13th by the end of the season in terms of TPE, no wide receiver above 800 in TPE and only 2 on the roster, and just no good RB, with Ayers still 2 seasons away from having top tier TPE while being too old to actually get there. Cobra Kai can be that top Tier RB in the future at least. Unfortunately for Honolulu, not even regression will spare them. Powers can probably still function as a kicker until the end of her career is forced on her, but Podolak's going into his 3rd season of regression and will be pretty poor as a WR at that point. Also, Holden Summers is about to hit his first season of regression and will head into the doldrums. Season 22's regression will also hurt, Dawkins and Gucci's player who I have typed out once and will not do so again will survive that regression for a while, but Skywalker is a dead man walking at that point, and will go under 800 TPE in that year. A number of defensive inactives as well as their current WR2 will also be made basically useless by the first regression. Tristain Hex might be able to fight against it though to be useful for one or two more seasons. As for replacements, Bradshaw, Christ Jr, and Watts are their top tier prospects at this point, although Lionel Rumper could end up being useful for a season or two as a dead body. This team has too many holes to fill as is and too many for those 4 to be their only top tier players though: They need to hit on this next draft where they have 3 picks in the first 2 rounds.
New Orleans Second Line
ISFL Roster:
Magnus Rikiya, S22 DT (1209 TPE, 5th among DTs)
Andrew Witten, S22 CB (1185 TPE, 3rd among CBs)
Ben Slothisberger, S22 QB (1177 TPE, 5th among QBs)
Ed Barker, S21 WR (1166 TPE, 3rd among WRs)
Mason Blaylock, S19 S (994 TPE, 8th among S)
David Rector, S18 CB (857 TPE, 13th among CBs)
Austin McCormick, S19 TE (796 TPE, 8th among TEs)
Medicinal Toblerone, S25 DE (711 TPE, 14th among DEs)
Busch Light, S24 LB (698 TPE, 21st among LBs)
LeBong Simwell, S24 DT (692 TPE, 15th among DTs)
Dorothy Zbornack, S24 CB (690 TPE, 24th among CBs)
Adam Mellott, S25 OL (681 TPE, 13th among OLs)
Brock Bodenhammer, S23 WR (667 TPE, 24th among WRs)
Adam C Spencer, S25 WR (615 TPE, 29th among WRs)
Dorfus Jimbo Jr, S21 OL (607 TPE, 15th among OLs)
Azarius Ranger, S24 DE (573 TPE, 18th among DEs)
Vincent Jones, S26 LB (543 TPE, 28th among LBs)
Mr. Forty Two, S26 RB (531 TPE, 20th among RBs)
Mike Rotchburns, S25 RB (515 TPE, 21st among RBs)
Ugarth the Dissector, S21 LB (481 TPE, 32nd among LBs)
Steven Wadham, S25 S (471 TPE, 30th among S)
Pseudo QB, S22 KR (317 TPE, 12th among KRs) (IA)
Quenton Bode, S15 LB (276 TPE, 41st among LBs)
Tom Hanks, S15 RB (275 TPE, 40th among RBs)
DSFL Players:
Julian Jurevicus, S26 WR (150 TPE)
Kevin Morrison, S27 LB (254 TPE)
Buck Nekkid, S27 CB (253 TPE)
Jonathan Shuffleboard, S26 S (364 TPE)
New Orleans managed to win the division of death last season by coming out on top of the 9-7 pile, getting 2nd seed and still getting all home games throughout the playoffs. NOLA's rewards were getting made into a meme by Yellowknife and a number of key retirements that make their team a whole lot worse than it was last year. There are some bright spots, specifically that secondary is extremely good in 3 out of 4 places, and they have a top flight QB this year, their defensive line is pretty good, but there are a number of places that almost definitely will hamper NOLA this year. The one that jumps out to me immediately is Linebacker. They may have the worst linebackers in the entire league, with none inside the top 20 and barely not having 2 outside. the top 30, and that doesn't even include the possibility that Quenton Bode plays a few snaps with the aid of his motorized wheelchair. Speaking of positions with Season 15 players to add shoddy depth, how are you doing, NOLA Running Backs? I would not be surprised if this ended up being the single biggest drop in a position group's performance in league history, as apparently the new sim will punish low TPE a lot more at that position, and the top 2 running backs combine for less than 1050 TPE. If Hanks plays snaps he's going to do so with less TPE than a number of DSFL running backs. To top off poor position groups, the OLine isn't great, the Kicker is awful, and the wideouts consist of a top tier threat and two guys in the 600s. Regression is also not going to be very kind to this team: Dorfus Jimbo's a pretty effective Olineman but is right at regression now, Ugarth the Dissector is their 3rd LB and doesn't have anywhere near enough TPE to survive 1 bought with regression, Barker has enough TPE to survive one year of regression as an elite player but almost certainly not 2, and David Rector, Mayson Blaylock, and Austin McCormick are all on their 2nd year of regression (or third in Rector's case) and are in their last seasons as great players. Well, perhaps Blaylock could stretch it out to another season but the other 2 are too low or too old to do that. NOLA's Season 22 players will be able to stave off regression for a year or two with how much TPE they have, minus Pseudo QB, but that'd only matter if their window would be reopened by season 23, 24, and 25 players hitting their peak, and as far as I can tell they have less of those coming up the pipeline than Season 22 or earlier players that will be going down, even if I'm being my most generous and say that their 3 S24 players with less than 700 TPE are still possibly elite quality. The DSFL will give them some replacements in the long run, Mason Blaylock and David Rector have heirs apparent in the DSFL, but Kevin Morrison isn't going to patch up the entire Linebacking core on his own.
New York Silverbacks
Leon McDavid, S21 DT (1322 TPE, 3rd among DTs)
Colt Mendoza, S22 CB (1132 TPE, 5th among CBs)
Jackson Kingston, S23 WR (1031 TPE, 7th among WRs)
Jack Banks, S22 LB (1014 TPE, 9th among LBs)
Sam Howitzer, S24 QB (929 TPE, 9th among QBs)
Dougie Smalls, S21 KR (876 TPE, 5th among KRs)
Sean Snyder, S22 WR (811 TPE, 17th among WRs)
Dukburg Quakstak, S25 CB (714 TPE, 17th among CBs)
Hank Winchester, S25 LB (693 TPE, 22nd among LBs)
Captain Rogers, S24 RB (657 TPE, 15th among RBs)
Bob Roberts, S25 S (644 TPE, 24th among S)
Bubba Thumper, S17 DT (643 TPE, 18th among DTs)
Thor Kirkby, S20 S (631 TPE, 25th among S)
Harley Fank, S25 WR (594 TPE, 33rd among WRs)
Brick Van Sanzo, S25 DE (546 TPE, 20th among DEs)
Dogwood Maple, S26 S (529 TPE, 28th among S)
Marlon Alexander, S25 OL (501 TPE, 21st among OLs)
Jayson Kearse, S19 DE (491 TPE, 24th among DEs)
Buster Bawls, S25 RB (483 TPE, 23rd among RBs)
Marc Hamel, S25 OL (476 TPE, 23rd among OLs)
Mac Griddle, S23 S (466 TPE, 34th among S)
Makoto Otawara, S26 LB (451 TPE, 37th among LBs)
Ashley Owens, S17 RB (386 TPE, 28th among RBs)
James Wilkinson, S27 TE (373 TPE, 16th among TEs)
DSFL Players:
Jalen Washington, S26 WR (156 TPE)
Primo Berto, S26 DT (226 TPE)
Rotor Wash, S27 KR (81 TPE)
The Silverbacks swung and missed at a shot to reach the Ultimus last year. However, they could definitely still compete for a playoff spot. Their QB is beginning to reach the peak of his powers, don't let that 9th place fool you, they have a pretty good top 2 wide receivers, and they have quite a few talented players on the defensive end. Unfortunately for them, most of that talent is young. While Dogwood Maple and Duckburg Quakstak should be titans of their respective classes, those classes are seasons away from peaking and right now lead to a secondary that is basically Colt Mendoza and a bunch of JAGs. Sometimes literally, considering how many safeties they have rostered. What is true for the secondary remains true for the defensive line, with Leon McDavid carrying Sanzo, Kearse, and the fast fading Bubba Thumper on his back. Running Back is also probably a big issue, with only 2 teams having worse RB1s, exactly as many as those who have an RB2 that is better than Rogers. Bawls is also bringing up the rear a bit as an RB2, and if they have to trot out Ashley Owens to run then I count running backs in the ISFL who are worse on TPE on a single hand. Regression treats this team kinder than most though. Sure, Ashley Owens goes into Frank Gore mode at that point, and the still serviceable Thumper probably heads out, but most of the rest is solvable or already solved: Dogwood Maple should be about as good as Thor Kirkby is this season by the start of the next one, Jayson Kearse is easy enough to replace, and Leon McDavid should have enough TPE to survive 2 seasons of regression as an elite player. As for Season 22 regression, the only one not poised to take a hit or two of regression in stride is Sean Snyder. Replacements, though, are where this team falls a bit short. Primo Berto could probably end up replacing Kearse without much loss, but it'd be fair to say that the talent on its DSFL roster is...slim to none. Still, on the roster, Otawara could be an heir to Jack Banks, and Maple should be more than a replacement for Kirkby. This roster's probably good enough to try for a playoff spot, and if it falls out of contention, it shouldn't be out of it for too long.
Orange County Otters
ISFL Roster:
Prince Vegeta, S21 S (1347 TPE, 1st among S)
Rotticus Scott, S21 DT (1256 TPE, 4th among DTs)
Brandon Booker, S22 CB (1223 TPE, 1st among CBs)
Heath Evans, S22 TE (1188 TPE, 1st among TEs)
Suleiman Ramza, S22 QB (1152 TPE, 7th among QBs)
Rapid Eagle, S21 DE (1123 TPE, 3rd among DEs)
Deshun Jones, S22 LB (1096 TPE, 5th among LBs)
Eugene Smoothie, S23 S (1012 TPE, 7th among S)
Garfield Despacito Jr, S22 WR (956 TPE, 10th among WRs)
Future Trunks, S21 OL (926 TPE, 4th among OLs) (IA)
Joseph Joestar, S24 LB (823 TPE, 17th among LBs)
Jeffrey Phillips, S22 TE (820 TPE, 7th among TEs) (IA) (Edit: I have been informed that Phillips is going to change to RB, which leaves OCO with...probably still the best TE group in the league with just Evans and not the worst RB group by a massive fucking margin, so I'd call that a pretty good decision. It's currently playing havoc with fantasy though.)
Goat Tank, S25 DT (743 TPE, 13th among DTs)
Bob Bob, S23 S (739 TPE, 17th among S) (IA)
Lord Beerus, S19 OL (717 TPE, 12th among OLs)
Tyrone Biggums, S18 S (716 TPE, 19th among S)
Richard Leaking, S25 CB (660 TPE, 26th among CBs)
Owen Holloway, S25 WR (659 TPE, 26th among WRs)
Carl Wheezer, S23 OL (498 TPE, 22nd among OLs) (Active but not updating)
3' Jeffrey, S23 DE (444 TPE, 27th among DEs) (Active but not updating)
Ne Mo, S24 OL (422 TPE, 27th among OLs)
Bronko Mills, S25 RB (311 TPE, 34th among RBs)
Ace Savage, S27 RB (304 TPE, 38th among RBs)
Sergio Kitchens, S24 LB (286 TPE, 49th among LBs)
Alex Dasistwirklichseinnachname, S15 KR (161 TPE, 17th among KRs)
DSFL Players:
Joe Bay, S27 WR (118 TPE)
Maiteers Rico Shea, S26 OL (348 TPE)
Monkey D. Luffy, S25 DT (233 TPE)
Bean Beanman, S27 DE (297 TPE)
Cayson Nzeocha, S27 CB (175 TPE)
Thelonius Junk, S27 KR (103 TPE)
My goodness, this team has such high highs but so very, very low lows. Any play on defense they will trot out 4 guys above 1100 TPE, and also possibly multiple people below 500 TPE. This team has plenty of strengths: 2 prime DTs, a secondary led by the highest TPE Cornerback and Vegeta, the Prince of all Safeties. 3' Jeffrey who hasn't updated since OCTOBER is going to be on the line, and it still might be the best line in the league. OCO almost certainly has the best secondary in the league. So...where does the other shoe drop? Let's start with Linebacker, specifically LB3. If Orange County ever plays with an LB3 in any formation, they're playing a guy with sub 300 TPE. Not enough for you? That's OK, it wouldn't be enough for me either. Offense...is an extremely mixed bag. They have a lot of bodies on the line, although none besides Beerus and Trunks have all that much TPE, the best Tight End in the league along with another extremely good one to act as a second TE, and a Quarterback in his prime. The catch here is the lack of talent at the diva positions. Wide Receiver isn't bad, but it's not exactly good either, with Despacito and Holloway being OK for their spots and no number 3 receiver unless they put Evans there (they will probably put Evans there). But all of this pales in comparison to what might be the single worst position group in the league in their RBs. They got quite a haul for trading Nakamura, but it's left them with 615 TPE at the RB position in total. Even if you combined the two only NOLA would have a worse RB1 and a couple of teams would have better RB2s than the hypothetical Bronko Savage. Let's not forget the kicker, either. Alex has stood the test of time and should be proud of all that he's accomplished. But it's pretty likely that his TPE which is a good bit lower than a number of DSFL kickers is going to cause him to miss some kicks. Regression isn't the worst fear for this team, but it's not exactly OK with the passage of time either: Vegeta will definitely survive at least 2 if not 3 seasons as a good Safety, Rapid Eagle might survive 2 seasons of regression as a good DE, but the inactive Trunks, Lord Beerus coming up on his second regression, and Biggums coming up on his third are all likely going to go from good players to average and maybe below average. Pretty much all of OCO's season 22 players will at least survive one bout with regression, so they've got that going for them. For a team with such low lows, I was surprised to see how many good players they had in the DSFL. Rico Shea and Beanman specifically could be really good at replacing the aging Oline and allowing OCO to not have to rely on an aging Jeffrey to fill out the DLine. This team could compete for an Ultimus or if Running backs are really important be a bottom feeder, I wouldn't be too shocked either way. Well, the latter would shock me but only because of the name attached to the team.
San Jose Sabercats
ISFL Roster:
Otis Allen, S21 DT (1338 TPE, 2nd among DTs)
Jamar Lackson, S22 RB (1215 TPE, 2nd among RBs)
Monterey "Monty" Jack, S22 QB (1170 TPE, 6th among QBs)
Matthew McDairmid, S22 KR (1162 TPE, 1st among KRs)
Lawrence Bass, S22 LB (1158 TPE, 2nd among LBs)
Tychondrius Hood, S23 WR (1049 TPE, 6th among WRs)
Rando Cardrissian, S21 RB (974 TPE, 7th among RBs)
Phillip Stein, S23 S (925 TPE, 11th among S)
George "Corpse Grinder" Fisher, S22 LB (877 TPE, 14th among LBs)
Brendan Lanier, S22 S (755 TPE, 16th among S)
Raylan Crowder, S25 DE (722 TPE, 12th among DEs)
Rich Triplet, S25 CB (719 TPE, 16th among CBs)
Yuuto Kira Cloudera, S23 DT (660 TPE, 17th among DTs)
Rashad Hilliard, S24 CB (658 TPE, 27th among CBs)
Xmus Flaxon Jaxon Waxon, S25 DE (646 TPE, 16th among DEs)
Rickie Vaughne, S24 CB (634 TPE, 31st among CBs)
Zach Crossley, S25 WR (603 TPE, 30th among WRs)
Tyron Brackenridge, S17 LB (542 TPE, 29th among LBs)
Tugg Speedman, S26 WR (508 TPE, 36th among WRs)
Jaja Ding Dong, S26 TE (503 TPE, 12th among TEs)
DSFL Players:
Bobby Tarantino, S27 TE (133 TPE) (IA)
Mills Wallace, S27 DE (131 TPE) (IA)
Duke Cheeks, S27 LB (284 TPE)
Dash Smith, S27 CB (96 TPE) (IA)
Finally, we have the Sabercats, who went from back to back champions to missing the playoffs and not even joining the 10 car pileup that was the 9-7 jamboree last season. Since then, they have retooled and are ready for season 27. They bring to the table the best Running Back room in the league, a QB in his prime, the best kicker in the league, and 2 good linebackers, as well as a pretty decent safety group. However, they have significant issues with their cornerbacks, with none of their 3 on the roster being higher than 16th. Their 3rd linebacker is also not that impressive, but their depth problems really start hitting with the Wide Receiver position. After Tychondrius Hood, they really don't have much; neither Crossley nor Speedman are great answers right now for WR 3, and definitely not for RB2. Depth issues also strike hard on the Defensive Line; past the impressive Otis Allen, they have an impressive but young Crowder, and then Cloudera and Waxon are not bad, but not good, especially not for starters. As for regression, Brackenridge is already deep within its grip, and will go from poor 3rd linebacker to flat out useless with another season. For the Season 21 players, Rando Cardrissian does not have enough TPE to be a fully elite player past his first season of regression and will fall off extremely hard after his second. Otis Allen on the other hand will definitely still be a good player after those 2 seasons. The season 22 players each have at least 2 seasons to regress before seeing their performance dip, with the exception of Fisher, who will fall to merely above average with one and unusable with two, and Lanier, who will probably be useless after one. The biggest issue that this team really has is that they don't really have replacements. Duke Cheeks is their only DSFL player who looks like they're on track to succeed in the ISFL, so he will replace Brackenridge, but this upcoming s28 class really needs to replace their season 22 players, especially those who won't be able to wait around. Of course, there is something else that could also derail this team's hopes: If the new sim makes Oline practically mandatory, then the Sabercats will be in a world of hurt on the Oline.
Well, that's all 14 teams. I'm not sure which team is exactly the best, but I have a few guesses. Same with the worst. Please, do let me know if I made any major mistakes, and I'll see you at preseason. <receives message> Wait, the preseason wasn't streamed? What the hell happened? I guess we'll see you for week 1 then!
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Arizona Outlaws
ISFL Roster:
Pete "Plop" Miller, S21 DT (1340 TPE, 1st among DTs)
Tatsu Nakamura, S22 RB (1204 TPE, 3rd among RBs)
Desmond Scarlett, S20 CB (1192 TPE, 2nd among CBs)
Thomas Passmann, S22 WR (1016 TPE, 8th among WRs)
Wesley Eriksen, S22 S (968 TPE, 9th among S)
Galf Wilf, S20 LB (960 TPE, 10th among LBs)
Stanislaw Koniecpolski, S22 LB (954 TPE, 11th among LBs)
DB Jadakiss, S23 S (937 TPE, 10th among S)
Jay Cue, S18 OL (901 TPE, 5th among OLs)
Taro Raimon, S24 WR (871 TPE, 14th among WRs)
Gunnar Thorbjornsson, S24 RB (870 TPE, 11th among RBs)
Charlemagne Cortez, S24 QB (836 TPE, 13th among QBs)
Sandro Ryeu, S22 DE (827 TPE, 10th among DEs) (IA)
Calvin Golladay, S22 OL (768 TPE, 9th among OLs)
L'Gazzy Burfict, S25 LB (701 TPE, 20th among LBs)
Tayshawn Crunk, S25 CB (692 TPE, 22nd among CBs)
Darren Pama, S25 WR (691 TPE, 22nd among WRs)
Chuck Roth, S25 DT (683 TPE, 16th among DTs)
Logan Noble Jr, S21 DE (594 TPE, 17th among DEs) (IA)
Mason Gillion, S25 CB (540 TPE, 32nd among CBs)
Rigby Racoon, S23 TE (438 TPE, 13th among TEs) (IA)
Tom Teboat, S26 TE (424 TPE, 15th among TEs)
J. J. "Jay" Jay-Jaymison, S21 KR (414 TPE, 11th among KRs)
Saba Donut, S17 WR (412 TPE, 41st among WRs)
Mattress Cadaire, S24 OL (401 TPE, 29th among OLs) (IA)
DSFL Players:
Moe Skeeter, S26 S (391 TPE)
Logan Sarrasin, S26 LB (408 TPE)
Akili Ozymandias, S26 RB (308 TPE)
Bismo Funyuns, S26 WR (137 TPE)
Ferghus Callaghan Jr, S27 DT (257 TPE)
Cade York, S27 KR (180 TPE)
Daquan Madison, S27 DT (165 TPE)
Hey look, it's my team! And oh boy are we in win now mode, if the trade for Tatsu Nakamura in the offseason didn't make very clear. Unfortunately, our seasons mean we're kind of caught halfway in and halfway out of our window right now: We have a number of good season 24 and 25 players who are earning well, but are not world beaters yet (I include myself here) and we have a number of Season 21 or older players who are going to regress before we get there. As for current roster construction, we have a good linebacking group, a great pair of safeties, one of the better Wide Receiver groupings in the league, and the 2nd best running back duo in the league by quite a good ways. We also have a pretty decent OLine now that Cue has beefed up to join it. On the other side of the coin, we have a pretty weak defensive line outside of Pete Miller, and the 2nd lowest TPE quarterback in the league, with the only guy below him being the only guy younger than him. Granted, this isn't on the level of, say, Easton Cole last year, or Jackie Daytona this year, but in an all in season you want a guy with more than 850 TPE to start the season at QB. Still, the Outlaws are going to be a contender for the playoffs this year, with or without a top flight QB. As for regression, this team has already had quite a chunk taken out of it by regression and it's going to hurt even more for the next 2 years. Galf Wilf and Desmond Scarlett are going on their second season, and Wilf will probably no longer be elite after this season (Scarlett probably has one more). Cue and Donut are already deep into regression, with Cue probably functioning as a decent Olineman for one or two more seasons, and Donut going probably off of spite for Phillip Rivers at this point in time. As for season 21 players, Plop has probably 2 more seasons after regression to still be an elite player, although Logan Noble Jr definitely can't take even one season of regression. Season 22's regression will probably end up knocking out our inactive Season 22 player completely, although most of the rest of our Season 22 players can survive one or even 2 bouts with regression. As for replacements, we have 3 different Season 26 prospects with varying levels of earning, a likely kicker replacement, and another season 27 prospect. They'll probably replace the currently falling and about to fall season 21 and 20 players in the defense, along with some of our inactives about to regress. We also have Tom Teboat about to overtake Rigby Racoon and hopefully being a decent TE.
Austin Copperheads
ISFL Roster:
Troen Egghands, S22 DE (1225 TPE, 2nd among DEs)
Tyler Montain, S23 DT (1097 TPE, 7th among DTs)
Videl San, S23 WR (1049 TPE, 5th among WRs)
Dex Kennedy, S22 LB (1044 TPE, 7th among LBs)
Lesean Paris Crooks, S23 CB (919 TPE, 11th among CBs)
Zoe Watts, S24 RB (913 TPE, 10th among RBs)
Eddie Jeeta, S22 WR (906 TPE, 12th among WRs) (IA)
Brach Thomaslacher, S24 LB (896 TPE, 13th among LBs)
Maverick Bowie, S24 S (886 TPE, 13th among S)
Doug Howlett, S23 WR (828 TPE, 15th among WRs)
Slinky Claxton, S22 DE (796 TPE, 11th among DEs) (IA)
Griffin Porter, S23 LB (780 TPE, 18th among LBs) (IA)
Gregor MacGregor, S21 S (735 TPE, 18th among S)
Friedrich Vequain, S22 TE (674 TPE, 9th among TEs)
Jackie Daytona, S25 QB (673 TPE, 14th among QBs)
Kichwa Jones, S22 RB (545 TPE, 19th among RBs) (IA)
Tomage McGullager, S23 CB (523 TPE, 34th among CBs)
Connor Quigley, S25 OL (473 TPE, 24th among OLs)
Ben Alexander Arnold, S25 CB (392 TPE, 39th among CBs)
Owen Isaac, S25 DE (391 TPE, 31st among DEs)
Slurms McKenzie, S26 OL (359 TPE, 30th among OLs)
Jim the Vampire, S27 LB (354 TPE, 45th among LBs)
Leo Bloomfield, S25 KR (246 TPE, 14th among KRs)
DSFL Players:
Candice D. Fitinyoumouf, S27 DT (245 TPE)
Carter Fox, S27 DT (152 TPE)
Ty Tyson, S26 LB (198 TPE)
Gluteus Maximus, S26 KR (295 TPE)
Speaking of teams in win mode, here we have the other team who's going to be held back by its quarterback if anything. This is easily the best wideout group in the league, most of the teams don't have 2 receivers better than this group's #3, and Berlin and Honolulu don't even have a single receiver better than that #3, Doug Howlett. Their defensive line is absolutely monstrous, with 2 players over 1000 TPE on the line. Their 3rd linebacker has over 750 TPE...and then there's the flip side. Starting with having absolutely the worst QB in the ISFL, by about 150 TPE at this point. More concerning is that their own secondary falls off a cliff at some point, their safeties combining for just over 1600 TPE is OK, not great, and then their CB2 and CB3 combine for just over 800 TPE. There will be a couple massive holes in their team no matter what alignment they are in, as they don't have a deep enough linebacker core, secondary, or defensive line to not have to play at least 3 people below 550 TPE on every single play, with a couple below 400. Their last weakness is the offensive line, which has a 2nd player worse than most team's 3rd player. As for regression, this is probably the youngest team in the league. Their oldest players are Season 22 outside of a single season 21, and thus any talk of regression or replacements will be a bit much in the future speculation department. But I certainly can do that future speculation! This team has a 3 or 4 year window right now, about the time for its season 23 players to fall off, before it goes through a rebuild. Season 22's first regression will also give it a bit of a shock, Troen Egghands will survive that with flying colors and Dex Kennedy will probably still end up over 1000 TPE, but the inactive Jeeta will go from a great second option to a worthwhile 3rd option to practically useless by 2 regressions, and the similarly inactive Kichwa Jones will go from a below average 2nd string RB to useless after one regression. Slinky Claxton will still be serviceable after one regression to completely useless after 2. As for Gregor MacGregor, their only Season 21 player, he's only at 735 TPE, and although he seems to be active right now, starting from that point is not a good base to go on for fighting regression. He might be able to survive 2 if he stays active, but he certainly won't be a good player that 2nd season. The only season 22 active player who will probably survive one regression but not 2 is their Tight End with 674 TPE right now. Still, this roster is only going to be stronger next season and maybe even the season after that.
Honolulu Hahalua
ISFL Roster:
Shawn Dawkins, S22 S (1197 TPE, 2nd among S)
Ke'oke'o Kane-Maika'i, S22 DE (1093 TPE, 5th among DEs)
Venus Powers, S20 KR (1043 TPE, 2nd among KR)
Heinrich Kackpoo, S23 LB (1041 TPE, 8th among LBs)
Jim Waters, S22 CB (933 TPE, 10th among CBs)
Luke Skywalker, S22 QB (917 TPE, 10th among QBs) (IA) (Behold, the most damaging IA in the entire league!)
Asher Montain, S24 DE (831 TPE, 9th among DEs)
Jed Podolak, S19 WR (799 TPE, 18th among WRs)
Nicholas Ayers, S23 RB (791 TPE, 13th among RBs)
Davriel Lavigne, S25 S (705 TPE, 20th among S)
Guy Fields, S25 LB (702 TPE, 19th among LBs)
Ray Ray Jackson, S23 CB (657 TPE, 28th among CBs) (IA)
William Alexander, S22 WR (594 TPE, 32nd among WRs) (IA)
Ragnar Krashwagen, S24 TE (589 TPE, 11th among TEs)
Cobra Kai, S26 RB (554 TPE, 18th among RBs)
Cadillac Harris, S22 CB (535 TPE, 33rd among CB) (IA)
Bane Ka'ana'ana, S23 DT (483 TPE, 23rd among DTs) (IA)
Buck Thornton, S22 S (467 TPE, 32nd among S) (IA)
Richard Littlewood, S26 OL (427 TPE, 25th among OLs)
Tristian Hex, S22 RB (416 TPE, 25th among RBs)
Holden Summers, S21 LB (403 TPE, 43rd among LBs) (IA)
Ismael Sanchez, S22 DE (390 TPE, 33rd among DEs) (IA)
Momona Keiki-Kane, S22 DT (343 TPE, 24th among DTs) (IA)
DSFL Players:
Joilet Christ Jr, S27 QB (313 TPE)
Sirdsvaldis Miglaskems, S26 RB (222 TPE)
Alex Reed, S25 WR (291 TPE)
Lalo Salamanca, S26 WR (213 TPE)
Eleven Kendrick Watts, S27 WR (354 TPE)
Lionel Rumper, S25 S (315 TPE)
Pope Francis, S26 DE (177 TPE)
Jason Bradshaw, S27 CB (249 TPE)
From 2 teams who are a young QB away from securing Ultimus contender status, to the one team in the league who's probably punting on their Season 22 QB. And not that I can blame them considering he hasn't been on the forums for over a month at this point. Honolulu's in some really tough shape right now, but they do have one spot where I can confidently say they are the strongest team in the league: The Defensive End position. They also have a top 2 kicker by a pretty significant distance. They have good players on their defense, the problem is that their offense might be the worst in the league. It's certainly up there, with a QB who might fall to 13th by the end of the season in terms of TPE, no wide receiver above 800 in TPE and only 2 on the roster, and just no good RB, with Ayers still 2 seasons away from having top tier TPE while being too old to actually get there. Cobra Kai can be that top Tier RB in the future at least. Unfortunately for Honolulu, not even regression will spare them. Powers can probably still function as a kicker until the end of her career is forced on her, but Podolak's going into his 3rd season of regression and will be pretty poor as a WR at that point. Also, Holden Summers is about to hit his first season of regression and will head into the doldrums. Season 22's regression will also hurt, Dawkins and Gucci's player who I have typed out once and will not do so again will survive that regression for a while, but Skywalker is a dead man walking at that point, and will go under 800 TPE in that year. A number of defensive inactives as well as their current WR2 will also be made basically useless by the first regression. Tristain Hex might be able to fight against it though to be useful for one or two more seasons. As for replacements, Bradshaw, Christ Jr, and Watts are their top tier prospects at this point, although Lionel Rumper could end up being useful for a season or two as a dead body. This team has too many holes to fill as is and too many for those 4 to be their only top tier players though: They need to hit on this next draft where they have 3 picks in the first 2 rounds.
New Orleans Second Line
ISFL Roster:
Magnus Rikiya, S22 DT (1209 TPE, 5th among DTs)
Andrew Witten, S22 CB (1185 TPE, 3rd among CBs)
Ben Slothisberger, S22 QB (1177 TPE, 5th among QBs)
Ed Barker, S21 WR (1166 TPE, 3rd among WRs)
Mason Blaylock, S19 S (994 TPE, 8th among S)
David Rector, S18 CB (857 TPE, 13th among CBs)
Austin McCormick, S19 TE (796 TPE, 8th among TEs)
Medicinal Toblerone, S25 DE (711 TPE, 14th among DEs)
Busch Light, S24 LB (698 TPE, 21st among LBs)
LeBong Simwell, S24 DT (692 TPE, 15th among DTs)
Dorothy Zbornack, S24 CB (690 TPE, 24th among CBs)
Adam Mellott, S25 OL (681 TPE, 13th among OLs)
Brock Bodenhammer, S23 WR (667 TPE, 24th among WRs)
Adam C Spencer, S25 WR (615 TPE, 29th among WRs)
Dorfus Jimbo Jr, S21 OL (607 TPE, 15th among OLs)
Azarius Ranger, S24 DE (573 TPE, 18th among DEs)
Vincent Jones, S26 LB (543 TPE, 28th among LBs)
Mr. Forty Two, S26 RB (531 TPE, 20th among RBs)
Mike Rotchburns, S25 RB (515 TPE, 21st among RBs)
Ugarth the Dissector, S21 LB (481 TPE, 32nd among LBs)
Steven Wadham, S25 S (471 TPE, 30th among S)
Pseudo QB, S22 KR (317 TPE, 12th among KRs) (IA)
Quenton Bode, S15 LB (276 TPE, 41st among LBs)
Tom Hanks, S15 RB (275 TPE, 40th among RBs)
DSFL Players:
Julian Jurevicus, S26 WR (150 TPE)
Kevin Morrison, S27 LB (254 TPE)
Buck Nekkid, S27 CB (253 TPE)
Jonathan Shuffleboard, S26 S (364 TPE)
New Orleans managed to win the division of death last season by coming out on top of the 9-7 pile, getting 2nd seed and still getting all home games throughout the playoffs. NOLA's rewards were getting made into a meme by Yellowknife and a number of key retirements that make their team a whole lot worse than it was last year. There are some bright spots, specifically that secondary is extremely good in 3 out of 4 places, and they have a top flight QB this year, their defensive line is pretty good, but there are a number of places that almost definitely will hamper NOLA this year. The one that jumps out to me immediately is Linebacker. They may have the worst linebackers in the entire league, with none inside the top 20 and barely not having 2 outside. the top 30, and that doesn't even include the possibility that Quenton Bode plays a few snaps with the aid of his motorized wheelchair. Speaking of positions with Season 15 players to add shoddy depth, how are you doing, NOLA Running Backs? I would not be surprised if this ended up being the single biggest drop in a position group's performance in league history, as apparently the new sim will punish low TPE a lot more at that position, and the top 2 running backs combine for less than 1050 TPE. If Hanks plays snaps he's going to do so with less TPE than a number of DSFL running backs. To top off poor position groups, the OLine isn't great, the Kicker is awful, and the wideouts consist of a top tier threat and two guys in the 600s. Regression is also not going to be very kind to this team: Dorfus Jimbo's a pretty effective Olineman but is right at regression now, Ugarth the Dissector is their 3rd LB and doesn't have anywhere near enough TPE to survive 1 bought with regression, Barker has enough TPE to survive one year of regression as an elite player but almost certainly not 2, and David Rector, Mayson Blaylock, and Austin McCormick are all on their 2nd year of regression (or third in Rector's case) and are in their last seasons as great players. Well, perhaps Blaylock could stretch it out to another season but the other 2 are too low or too old to do that. NOLA's Season 22 players will be able to stave off regression for a year or two with how much TPE they have, minus Pseudo QB, but that'd only matter if their window would be reopened by season 23, 24, and 25 players hitting their peak, and as far as I can tell they have less of those coming up the pipeline than Season 22 or earlier players that will be going down, even if I'm being my most generous and say that their 3 S24 players with less than 700 TPE are still possibly elite quality. The DSFL will give them some replacements in the long run, Mason Blaylock and David Rector have heirs apparent in the DSFL, but Kevin Morrison isn't going to patch up the entire Linebacking core on his own.
New York Silverbacks
Leon McDavid, S21 DT (1322 TPE, 3rd among DTs)
Colt Mendoza, S22 CB (1132 TPE, 5th among CBs)
Jackson Kingston, S23 WR (1031 TPE, 7th among WRs)
Jack Banks, S22 LB (1014 TPE, 9th among LBs)
Sam Howitzer, S24 QB (929 TPE, 9th among QBs)
Dougie Smalls, S21 KR (876 TPE, 5th among KRs)
Sean Snyder, S22 WR (811 TPE, 17th among WRs)
Dukburg Quakstak, S25 CB (714 TPE, 17th among CBs)
Hank Winchester, S25 LB (693 TPE, 22nd among LBs)
Captain Rogers, S24 RB (657 TPE, 15th among RBs)
Bob Roberts, S25 S (644 TPE, 24th among S)
Bubba Thumper, S17 DT (643 TPE, 18th among DTs)
Thor Kirkby, S20 S (631 TPE, 25th among S)
Harley Fank, S25 WR (594 TPE, 33rd among WRs)
Brick Van Sanzo, S25 DE (546 TPE, 20th among DEs)
Dogwood Maple, S26 S (529 TPE, 28th among S)
Marlon Alexander, S25 OL (501 TPE, 21st among OLs)
Jayson Kearse, S19 DE (491 TPE, 24th among DEs)
Buster Bawls, S25 RB (483 TPE, 23rd among RBs)
Marc Hamel, S25 OL (476 TPE, 23rd among OLs)
Mac Griddle, S23 S (466 TPE, 34th among S)
Makoto Otawara, S26 LB (451 TPE, 37th among LBs)
Ashley Owens, S17 RB (386 TPE, 28th among RBs)
James Wilkinson, S27 TE (373 TPE, 16th among TEs)
DSFL Players:
Jalen Washington, S26 WR (156 TPE)
Primo Berto, S26 DT (226 TPE)
Rotor Wash, S27 KR (81 TPE)
The Silverbacks swung and missed at a shot to reach the Ultimus last year. However, they could definitely still compete for a playoff spot. Their QB is beginning to reach the peak of his powers, don't let that 9th place fool you, they have a pretty good top 2 wide receivers, and they have quite a few talented players on the defensive end. Unfortunately for them, most of that talent is young. While Dogwood Maple and Duckburg Quakstak should be titans of their respective classes, those classes are seasons away from peaking and right now lead to a secondary that is basically Colt Mendoza and a bunch of JAGs. Sometimes literally, considering how many safeties they have rostered. What is true for the secondary remains true for the defensive line, with Leon McDavid carrying Sanzo, Kearse, and the fast fading Bubba Thumper on his back. Running Back is also probably a big issue, with only 2 teams having worse RB1s, exactly as many as those who have an RB2 that is better than Rogers. Bawls is also bringing up the rear a bit as an RB2, and if they have to trot out Ashley Owens to run then I count running backs in the ISFL who are worse on TPE on a single hand. Regression treats this team kinder than most though. Sure, Ashley Owens goes into Frank Gore mode at that point, and the still serviceable Thumper probably heads out, but most of the rest is solvable or already solved: Dogwood Maple should be about as good as Thor Kirkby is this season by the start of the next one, Jayson Kearse is easy enough to replace, and Leon McDavid should have enough TPE to survive 2 seasons of regression as an elite player. As for Season 22 regression, the only one not poised to take a hit or two of regression in stride is Sean Snyder. Replacements, though, are where this team falls a bit short. Primo Berto could probably end up replacing Kearse without much loss, but it'd be fair to say that the talent on its DSFL roster is...slim to none. Still, on the roster, Otawara could be an heir to Jack Banks, and Maple should be more than a replacement for Kirkby. This roster's probably good enough to try for a playoff spot, and if it falls out of contention, it shouldn't be out of it for too long.
Orange County Otters
ISFL Roster:
Prince Vegeta, S21 S (1347 TPE, 1st among S)
Rotticus Scott, S21 DT (1256 TPE, 4th among DTs)
Brandon Booker, S22 CB (1223 TPE, 1st among CBs)
Heath Evans, S22 TE (1188 TPE, 1st among TEs)
Suleiman Ramza, S22 QB (1152 TPE, 7th among QBs)
Rapid Eagle, S21 DE (1123 TPE, 3rd among DEs)
Deshun Jones, S22 LB (1096 TPE, 5th among LBs)
Eugene Smoothie, S23 S (1012 TPE, 7th among S)
Garfield Despacito Jr, S22 WR (956 TPE, 10th among WRs)
Future Trunks, S21 OL (926 TPE, 4th among OLs) (IA)
Joseph Joestar, S24 LB (823 TPE, 17th among LBs)
Jeffrey Phillips, S22 TE (820 TPE, 7th among TEs) (IA) (Edit: I have been informed that Phillips is going to change to RB, which leaves OCO with...probably still the best TE group in the league with just Evans and not the worst RB group by a massive fucking margin, so I'd call that a pretty good decision. It's currently playing havoc with fantasy though.)
Goat Tank, S25 DT (743 TPE, 13th among DTs)
Bob Bob, S23 S (739 TPE, 17th among S) (IA)
Lord Beerus, S19 OL (717 TPE, 12th among OLs)
Tyrone Biggums, S18 S (716 TPE, 19th among S)
Richard Leaking, S25 CB (660 TPE, 26th among CBs)
Owen Holloway, S25 WR (659 TPE, 26th among WRs)
Carl Wheezer, S23 OL (498 TPE, 22nd among OLs) (Active but not updating)
3' Jeffrey, S23 DE (444 TPE, 27th among DEs) (Active but not updating)
Ne Mo, S24 OL (422 TPE, 27th among OLs)
Bronko Mills, S25 RB (311 TPE, 34th among RBs)
Ace Savage, S27 RB (304 TPE, 38th among RBs)
Sergio Kitchens, S24 LB (286 TPE, 49th among LBs)
Alex Dasistwirklichseinnachname, S15 KR (161 TPE, 17th among KRs)
DSFL Players:
Joe Bay, S27 WR (118 TPE)
Maiteers Rico Shea, S26 OL (348 TPE)
Monkey D. Luffy, S25 DT (233 TPE)
Bean Beanman, S27 DE (297 TPE)
Cayson Nzeocha, S27 CB (175 TPE)
Thelonius Junk, S27 KR (103 TPE)
My goodness, this team has such high highs but so very, very low lows. Any play on defense they will trot out 4 guys above 1100 TPE, and also possibly multiple people below 500 TPE. This team has plenty of strengths: 2 prime DTs, a secondary led by the highest TPE Cornerback and Vegeta, the Prince of all Safeties. 3' Jeffrey who hasn't updated since OCTOBER is going to be on the line, and it still might be the best line in the league. OCO almost certainly has the best secondary in the league. So...where does the other shoe drop? Let's start with Linebacker, specifically LB3. If Orange County ever plays with an LB3 in any formation, they're playing a guy with sub 300 TPE. Not enough for you? That's OK, it wouldn't be enough for me either. Offense...is an extremely mixed bag. They have a lot of bodies on the line, although none besides Beerus and Trunks have all that much TPE, the best Tight End in the league along with another extremely good one to act as a second TE, and a Quarterback in his prime. The catch here is the lack of talent at the diva positions. Wide Receiver isn't bad, but it's not exactly good either, with Despacito and Holloway being OK for their spots and no number 3 receiver unless they put Evans there (they will probably put Evans there). But all of this pales in comparison to what might be the single worst position group in the league in their RBs. They got quite a haul for trading Nakamura, but it's left them with 615 TPE at the RB position in total. Even if you combined the two only NOLA would have a worse RB1 and a couple of teams would have better RB2s than the hypothetical Bronko Savage. Let's not forget the kicker, either. Alex has stood the test of time and should be proud of all that he's accomplished. But it's pretty likely that his TPE which is a good bit lower than a number of DSFL kickers is going to cause him to miss some kicks. Regression isn't the worst fear for this team, but it's not exactly OK with the passage of time either: Vegeta will definitely survive at least 2 if not 3 seasons as a good Safety, Rapid Eagle might survive 2 seasons of regression as a good DE, but the inactive Trunks, Lord Beerus coming up on his second regression, and Biggums coming up on his third are all likely going to go from good players to average and maybe below average. Pretty much all of OCO's season 22 players will at least survive one bout with regression, so they've got that going for them. For a team with such low lows, I was surprised to see how many good players they had in the DSFL. Rico Shea and Beanman specifically could be really good at replacing the aging Oline and allowing OCO to not have to rely on an aging Jeffrey to fill out the DLine. This team could compete for an Ultimus or if Running backs are really important be a bottom feeder, I wouldn't be too shocked either way. Well, the latter would shock me but only because of the name attached to the team.
San Jose Sabercats
ISFL Roster:
Otis Allen, S21 DT (1338 TPE, 2nd among DTs)
Jamar Lackson, S22 RB (1215 TPE, 2nd among RBs)
Monterey "Monty" Jack, S22 QB (1170 TPE, 6th among QBs)
Matthew McDairmid, S22 KR (1162 TPE, 1st among KRs)
Lawrence Bass, S22 LB (1158 TPE, 2nd among LBs)
Tychondrius Hood, S23 WR (1049 TPE, 6th among WRs)
Rando Cardrissian, S21 RB (974 TPE, 7th among RBs)
Phillip Stein, S23 S (925 TPE, 11th among S)
George "Corpse Grinder" Fisher, S22 LB (877 TPE, 14th among LBs)
Brendan Lanier, S22 S (755 TPE, 16th among S)
Raylan Crowder, S25 DE (722 TPE, 12th among DEs)
Rich Triplet, S25 CB (719 TPE, 16th among CBs)
Yuuto Kira Cloudera, S23 DT (660 TPE, 17th among DTs)
Rashad Hilliard, S24 CB (658 TPE, 27th among CBs)
Xmus Flaxon Jaxon Waxon, S25 DE (646 TPE, 16th among DEs)
Rickie Vaughne, S24 CB (634 TPE, 31st among CBs)
Zach Crossley, S25 WR (603 TPE, 30th among WRs)
Tyron Brackenridge, S17 LB (542 TPE, 29th among LBs)
Tugg Speedman, S26 WR (508 TPE, 36th among WRs)
Jaja Ding Dong, S26 TE (503 TPE, 12th among TEs)
DSFL Players:
Bobby Tarantino, S27 TE (133 TPE) (IA)
Mills Wallace, S27 DE (131 TPE) (IA)
Duke Cheeks, S27 LB (284 TPE)
Dash Smith, S27 CB (96 TPE) (IA)
Finally, we have the Sabercats, who went from back to back champions to missing the playoffs and not even joining the 10 car pileup that was the 9-7 jamboree last season. Since then, they have retooled and are ready for season 27. They bring to the table the best Running Back room in the league, a QB in his prime, the best kicker in the league, and 2 good linebackers, as well as a pretty decent safety group. However, they have significant issues with their cornerbacks, with none of their 3 on the roster being higher than 16th. Their 3rd linebacker is also not that impressive, but their depth problems really start hitting with the Wide Receiver position. After Tychondrius Hood, they really don't have much; neither Crossley nor Speedman are great answers right now for WR 3, and definitely not for RB2. Depth issues also strike hard on the Defensive Line; past the impressive Otis Allen, they have an impressive but young Crowder, and then Cloudera and Waxon are not bad, but not good, especially not for starters. As for regression, Brackenridge is already deep within its grip, and will go from poor 3rd linebacker to flat out useless with another season. For the Season 21 players, Rando Cardrissian does not have enough TPE to be a fully elite player past his first season of regression and will fall off extremely hard after his second. Otis Allen on the other hand will definitely still be a good player after those 2 seasons. The season 22 players each have at least 2 seasons to regress before seeing their performance dip, with the exception of Fisher, who will fall to merely above average with one and unusable with two, and Lanier, who will probably be useless after one. The biggest issue that this team really has is that they don't really have replacements. Duke Cheeks is their only DSFL player who looks like they're on track to succeed in the ISFL, so he will replace Brackenridge, but this upcoming s28 class really needs to replace their season 22 players, especially those who won't be able to wait around. Of course, there is something else that could also derail this team's hopes: If the new sim makes Oline practically mandatory, then the Sabercats will be in a world of hurt on the Oline.
Well, that's all 14 teams. I'm not sure which team is exactly the best, but I have a few guesses. Same with the worst. Please, do let me know if I made any major mistakes, and I'll see you at preseason. <receives message> Wait, the preseason wasn't streamed? What the hell happened? I guess we'll see you for week 1 then!
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