Portland Pythons – Building Off Successes, and Overcoming Failures
Portland has been at the top of the league for several seasons running, but unfortunately hasn’t achieved the level of success that the media and fans expect of them. Just like the Patriots of the early 2000s and 2010s, Portland has an expectation of success that exceeds much of the other league. How do they overcome the disappointments of the last two seasons?
First things first, Portland has got a lot to be excited about. They brought on a number of rookies in Season 27 that hit the ground running and appear to be cornerstones of the franchise heading into the 28th season for the DSFL. Picks like Saleem Spence, front runner for both Rookie of the Year and Wide Receiver of the year – he hit the ground running… well sprinting at an absolutely blistering pace with Portland this last year. Saleem destroyed the competition helping to lead the Pythons to the number one seed in their division this year. Xavier Walls was brought in to the organization too – and while he has had a strong impact on the field, his off field leadership is what really impressed the Python’s organization. Xavier was quickly promoted to defensive captain early in Season 27, bolstering an already impressive leadership core in the Python’s Locker Room. Stumpy Jones was also picked up in this years’ draft – a top Offensive Line prospect, he decimated opponents and opened holes for the dynamic rushing duo of Giovanni Bianchi and Remus Roman. He also impressed in pass protection, making sure reigning MVP Lebron James III could show off his skills in the passing game. Remus Roman showed off his skills in the running game as well, drafted at Safety and moved to Running Back before the first training camp, Roman broke records alongside veteran Giovanni Bianchi in Season 27. Both running backs ran for over 850 yards, averaging over 4.8 Yards Per Carry. Roman even sprinkled in a record setting 269 yard, three touchdown, five carry performance against the Kansas City Coyotes in week 7. Gritt Gurdur was another that was brought on to the team in Season 27 – hopes were higher for his overall performance and TPE generation, but to have a higher than average TPE earner be your biggest miss in the draft is still a huge success for the organization as a whole.
This doesn’t take into account the strong veteran core from Season 25 and 26 that Portland already had. They have reigning MVP Lebron James III at Quarterback – someone that really has the potential to carry Portland all the way. This is on top of other huge names like Evan Jones, Donald McBobby, Moe Skeeter, and Giovanni Bianchi. More than enough talent to build two solid teams right there.
Even with the injection of this new talent it couldn’t push them over the hump this year, eventually they lost to Kansas City in the first round of the playoffs. What can get them to that next level though? To an extent this can be blamed on “Sim gonna sim,” but what can Portand actively do to get that cherished Ultimini Championship?
One can’t argue that the sim screwed the playoff picture in the first round, several key penalties and issues led to the fall of not just Portland, but Tijuana as well, leading to the Ultimini Finale of Kansas City versus Dallas (with the Dallas Birddogs ultimately prevailing). Taking a look at Portland, you have 3 massive runs by Roman, and two by Giovanni Bianchi – both of whom have over 90 speed, but for some reason all of these runs ended in just one touchdown. Several questionable calls led to an early end of the game, with Lebron James III being outplayed by an uncapped rookie quarterback who threw nearly 50 times. Penalties racked up on Portland’s side of the ball, with several key penalties extending drives that resulted in Kansas City Points.
Just to touch on the Tijuana game as well, Tijuana held a 10 point lead heading into the final 4 minutes of the game, ultimately blowing their lead and letting Dallas walk out with a victory – this victory can most definitely be placed on the shoulders of two key plays: One 4th and 15 penalty by the Luchadores that resulted in a first and goal for Dallas (ending in the first touchdown), and a second 4th and 15 with less than a minute remaining that would have sealed the game for Tijuana if not for a penalty on the defense. These two plays resulted in a 14 point swing for Dallas. Sim Gonna Sim.
Now to continue with the main point of this article – what can Portland actually do? I think Portland needs to spend some time this offseason to do some sim testing. Portland, I believe, was screwed over more by the change in the sim for Season 27. They operated as they had the previous season, encouraging the placement of TPE into a number of statistics that may have had less impact. For instance, running backs benefited a lot more from investment in Strength and Agility than previously thought – these statistics greatly increased the average yards per carry of each of their running backs. Roman prior to these implementations, was a boom or bust type runner, averaging just over 3 yards per carry, either getting tackled behind the line of scrimmage or busting free for a 40+ yard run.
Another instance of this was Intelligence – in previous iterations of the league Intelligence was widely considered to be a wasted stat… something that did not have a massive impact on the overall outcome of a game. Boy was everyone wrong about this. Penalties (influenced by the Intelligence stat) were arguably the most influential part of most games this year, teams lived and died by the penalty (looking at you Tijuana vs. Dallas), with it not being uncommon for a defense to have 10+ penalties in a given game. These penalties were devastating and allowed offenses to continue drives and create additional scoring opportunities. Offensive penalties, arguably, were much less impactful. Most teams advised their defenses to pad those stats after just a few games, recognizing the importance of mitigating penalties as much as possible.
Continued testing of the new sim is important to Portland’s success – they have had the highest average TPE earners for the last few seasons, so knowing how to properly invest that TPE to maximize potential for victory is important in the long run.
Another thing Portland could do is continue drafting well – a tall order for any organization, and especially one that has been so successful at it for the last several seasons. I mention it because of the departure of SouthPaw as GM of the Pythons. SouthPaw was a naturally gifted scout and made a strong impression on rookies, so his leaving will definitely impact the future of the league. Will Zeagle and Hordle be able to keep up with Python drafting tradition?
Drafting well is particularly key in the DSFL. When total TPE is lower, each individual point has an exponentially higher impact on the team’s success. Portland has averaged strong TPE generation over the last several seasons, so it’s important that they continue to identify really active users in the community and in the Locker Room. As a Python myself, I think one of the reasons that the team has had such great users and drafting over the last few years is the locker room itself. It offers the opportunity to get involved with regular and constant reminders to get things done. It’s a no pressure environment, but they do a great job of motivating people to continue earning and maximize their players’ potential for TPE generation.
There are a lot of big names coming up in Season 29, and the newly appointed GMs and Scouts have a lot of work ahead of them to achieve the same level of success as seasons past. With a few more key additions we could be looking at the Season 28 Ultimini Champions.
Keep staying positive – It’s tough to experience hard losses like Portland has this year. Will it impact the locker room for Season 28? Are the players going to be able to handle the pressure that is placed on their shoulders? It’s tough to tell. In demoralizing situations like this it is important to maintain perspective and ensure that each user isn’t discouraged from participation. First and foremost this league is about fun, and if people feel like their efforts haven’t paid off they may take a break, let something slide, or ultimately forget about the league. While it has been difficult, it’s important for the Portland leadership to keep an eye on their players, make sure each one is having a good time, and to not dwell on the negativity of a hard loss in the first round of the playoffs. Lingering too long on that experience will only spell bad things for the organization.
Hold out hope for the future – Sometimes this league is just about luck. As a DSFL rookie myself, it didn’t take long to come to that conclusion… Hell my first experience with the league was the Prospect Bowl. My Auckland Laser Kiwis managed to take down the Macchu Picchu Sol in the Prospect Bowl Championship in the most unlikely of ways: Down by 14 with less than 5 minutes remaining in the championship game, we scored a touchdown, recovered a fumble, scored another touchdown, got an interception, and won the game on a field goal. One of the most improbably scenarios to ever happen and it happened in my first experience with the league. Sometimes the sim just wants you to win (or lose – sorry Amulos and xTitanxMVPx), and that’s just the name of the game. I can’t tell you how many individual / lucky plays had a significant outcome on a game we played this season. Each game is a roll of the dice, and I hold out hope that those dice will be in our favor next season. The reality is Portland has the best prospects of any team to win the Ultimini next year. They continue strong internal development of their players, and with that they will load the dice to better their odds. With a positive attitude, some invested players, and some good sim luck I think Portland will walk out the victor in Season 28.
Pay more in bribes to the Commissioner and Officers of the League – It’s clear to me that Zeagle, Hordle, and SouthPaw are just mismanaging team funds. Rather than funneling all of our money into paying off referees and league commissioners to make sure we win every game, they are doing stupid things like paying players so they can afford weekly trainings. What we really need is to pay more money to the Sim Officials, a strategy so very clearly employed by the Dallas Birddogs in Season 27. It’s clear to me that the General Managers just don’t care enough about bringing another championship back to Portland – all they want to do is “win honorably” and “not cheat.” I think Season 27 really exemplifies why this strategy is ineffective.
Is it a finance issue? Maybe. If so, maybe we could offer to do the commissioner / league official’s taxes this year or something? I’m not sure but it is not my job to find these solutions. I really hope for a better investment from the Portland leadership this season. With more investment comes more success.
Obviously that last point is satire, but I really do look forward to the prospect of a strong performance by Portland in Season 28. With a strong leadership core, the injection of new and active talent, and a renewed vigor for winning a championship I think they have a great window of opportunity to make it to, and ultimately win the Ultimini. Employing just a few of these strategies (and quite a bit of luck as well) will greatly increase the odds of victory.
Go Sneks, I love you guys!
(2016 words)
Portland has been at the top of the league for several seasons running, but unfortunately hasn’t achieved the level of success that the media and fans expect of them. Just like the Patriots of the early 2000s and 2010s, Portland has an expectation of success that exceeds much of the other league. How do they overcome the disappointments of the last two seasons?
First things first, Portland has got a lot to be excited about. They brought on a number of rookies in Season 27 that hit the ground running and appear to be cornerstones of the franchise heading into the 28th season for the DSFL. Picks like Saleem Spence, front runner for both Rookie of the Year and Wide Receiver of the year – he hit the ground running… well sprinting at an absolutely blistering pace with Portland this last year. Saleem destroyed the competition helping to lead the Pythons to the number one seed in their division this year. Xavier Walls was brought in to the organization too – and while he has had a strong impact on the field, his off field leadership is what really impressed the Python’s organization. Xavier was quickly promoted to defensive captain early in Season 27, bolstering an already impressive leadership core in the Python’s Locker Room. Stumpy Jones was also picked up in this years’ draft – a top Offensive Line prospect, he decimated opponents and opened holes for the dynamic rushing duo of Giovanni Bianchi and Remus Roman. He also impressed in pass protection, making sure reigning MVP Lebron James III could show off his skills in the passing game. Remus Roman showed off his skills in the running game as well, drafted at Safety and moved to Running Back before the first training camp, Roman broke records alongside veteran Giovanni Bianchi in Season 27. Both running backs ran for over 850 yards, averaging over 4.8 Yards Per Carry. Roman even sprinkled in a record setting 269 yard, three touchdown, five carry performance against the Kansas City Coyotes in week 7. Gritt Gurdur was another that was brought on to the team in Season 27 – hopes were higher for his overall performance and TPE generation, but to have a higher than average TPE earner be your biggest miss in the draft is still a huge success for the organization as a whole.
This doesn’t take into account the strong veteran core from Season 25 and 26 that Portland already had. They have reigning MVP Lebron James III at Quarterback – someone that really has the potential to carry Portland all the way. This is on top of other huge names like Evan Jones, Donald McBobby, Moe Skeeter, and Giovanni Bianchi. More than enough talent to build two solid teams right there.
Even with the injection of this new talent it couldn’t push them over the hump this year, eventually they lost to Kansas City in the first round of the playoffs. What can get them to that next level though? To an extent this can be blamed on “Sim gonna sim,” but what can Portand actively do to get that cherished Ultimini Championship?
One can’t argue that the sim screwed the playoff picture in the first round, several key penalties and issues led to the fall of not just Portland, but Tijuana as well, leading to the Ultimini Finale of Kansas City versus Dallas (with the Dallas Birddogs ultimately prevailing). Taking a look at Portland, you have 3 massive runs by Roman, and two by Giovanni Bianchi – both of whom have over 90 speed, but for some reason all of these runs ended in just one touchdown. Several questionable calls led to an early end of the game, with Lebron James III being outplayed by an uncapped rookie quarterback who threw nearly 50 times. Penalties racked up on Portland’s side of the ball, with several key penalties extending drives that resulted in Kansas City Points.
Just to touch on the Tijuana game as well, Tijuana held a 10 point lead heading into the final 4 minutes of the game, ultimately blowing their lead and letting Dallas walk out with a victory – this victory can most definitely be placed on the shoulders of two key plays: One 4th and 15 penalty by the Luchadores that resulted in a first and goal for Dallas (ending in the first touchdown), and a second 4th and 15 with less than a minute remaining that would have sealed the game for Tijuana if not for a penalty on the defense. These two plays resulted in a 14 point swing for Dallas. Sim Gonna Sim.
Now to continue with the main point of this article – what can Portland actually do? I think Portland needs to spend some time this offseason to do some sim testing. Portland, I believe, was screwed over more by the change in the sim for Season 27. They operated as they had the previous season, encouraging the placement of TPE into a number of statistics that may have had less impact. For instance, running backs benefited a lot more from investment in Strength and Agility than previously thought – these statistics greatly increased the average yards per carry of each of their running backs. Roman prior to these implementations, was a boom or bust type runner, averaging just over 3 yards per carry, either getting tackled behind the line of scrimmage or busting free for a 40+ yard run.
Another instance of this was Intelligence – in previous iterations of the league Intelligence was widely considered to be a wasted stat… something that did not have a massive impact on the overall outcome of a game. Boy was everyone wrong about this. Penalties (influenced by the Intelligence stat) were arguably the most influential part of most games this year, teams lived and died by the penalty (looking at you Tijuana vs. Dallas), with it not being uncommon for a defense to have 10+ penalties in a given game. These penalties were devastating and allowed offenses to continue drives and create additional scoring opportunities. Offensive penalties, arguably, were much less impactful. Most teams advised their defenses to pad those stats after just a few games, recognizing the importance of mitigating penalties as much as possible.
Continued testing of the new sim is important to Portland’s success – they have had the highest average TPE earners for the last few seasons, so knowing how to properly invest that TPE to maximize potential for victory is important in the long run.
Another thing Portland could do is continue drafting well – a tall order for any organization, and especially one that has been so successful at it for the last several seasons. I mention it because of the departure of SouthPaw as GM of the Pythons. SouthPaw was a naturally gifted scout and made a strong impression on rookies, so his leaving will definitely impact the future of the league. Will Zeagle and Hordle be able to keep up with Python drafting tradition?
Drafting well is particularly key in the DSFL. When total TPE is lower, each individual point has an exponentially higher impact on the team’s success. Portland has averaged strong TPE generation over the last several seasons, so it’s important that they continue to identify really active users in the community and in the Locker Room. As a Python myself, I think one of the reasons that the team has had such great users and drafting over the last few years is the locker room itself. It offers the opportunity to get involved with regular and constant reminders to get things done. It’s a no pressure environment, but they do a great job of motivating people to continue earning and maximize their players’ potential for TPE generation.
There are a lot of big names coming up in Season 29, and the newly appointed GMs and Scouts have a lot of work ahead of them to achieve the same level of success as seasons past. With a few more key additions we could be looking at the Season 28 Ultimini Champions.
Keep staying positive – It’s tough to experience hard losses like Portland has this year. Will it impact the locker room for Season 28? Are the players going to be able to handle the pressure that is placed on their shoulders? It’s tough to tell. In demoralizing situations like this it is important to maintain perspective and ensure that each user isn’t discouraged from participation. First and foremost this league is about fun, and if people feel like their efforts haven’t paid off they may take a break, let something slide, or ultimately forget about the league. While it has been difficult, it’s important for the Portland leadership to keep an eye on their players, make sure each one is having a good time, and to not dwell on the negativity of a hard loss in the first round of the playoffs. Lingering too long on that experience will only spell bad things for the organization.
Hold out hope for the future – Sometimes this league is just about luck. As a DSFL rookie myself, it didn’t take long to come to that conclusion… Hell my first experience with the league was the Prospect Bowl. My Auckland Laser Kiwis managed to take down the Macchu Picchu Sol in the Prospect Bowl Championship in the most unlikely of ways: Down by 14 with less than 5 minutes remaining in the championship game, we scored a touchdown, recovered a fumble, scored another touchdown, got an interception, and won the game on a field goal. One of the most improbably scenarios to ever happen and it happened in my first experience with the league. Sometimes the sim just wants you to win (or lose – sorry Amulos and xTitanxMVPx), and that’s just the name of the game. I can’t tell you how many individual / lucky plays had a significant outcome on a game we played this season. Each game is a roll of the dice, and I hold out hope that those dice will be in our favor next season. The reality is Portland has the best prospects of any team to win the Ultimini next year. They continue strong internal development of their players, and with that they will load the dice to better their odds. With a positive attitude, some invested players, and some good sim luck I think Portland will walk out the victor in Season 28.
Pay more in bribes to the Commissioner and Officers of the League – It’s clear to me that Zeagle, Hordle, and SouthPaw are just mismanaging team funds. Rather than funneling all of our money into paying off referees and league commissioners to make sure we win every game, they are doing stupid things like paying players so they can afford weekly trainings. What we really need is to pay more money to the Sim Officials, a strategy so very clearly employed by the Dallas Birddogs in Season 27. It’s clear to me that the General Managers just don’t care enough about bringing another championship back to Portland – all they want to do is “win honorably” and “not cheat.” I think Season 27 really exemplifies why this strategy is ineffective.
Is it a finance issue? Maybe. If so, maybe we could offer to do the commissioner / league official’s taxes this year or something? I’m not sure but it is not my job to find these solutions. I really hope for a better investment from the Portland leadership this season. With more investment comes more success.
Obviously that last point is satire, but I really do look forward to the prospect of a strong performance by Portland in Season 28. With a strong leadership core, the injection of new and active talent, and a renewed vigor for winning a championship I think they have a great window of opportunity to make it to, and ultimately win the Ultimini. Employing just a few of these strategies (and quite a bit of luck as well) will greatly increase the odds of victory.
Go Sneks, I love you guys!
(2016 words)