(S28) Ultimus Week

[mango8154]

17) Well I would like Minnesota’s stadium to be sort of like old football (soccer) stadiums, sort of like Upton park, where the seating is right up close to the sideline and action and the seating is steep so the high seats are closer, however I feel like this wouldn’t be conducive to the game of American football as balls going through the air into the sidelines would definitely hit someone, and any punts that went off the target would go into the crowd hitting someone, it would have a unique feel however and everyone would able to see the game action clearly which would improve game day goers experience. I would also like there to be a Duck statue on the roof sort of like the cockerel on the Tottenham Hotspur stadium, as the Duck is important to the club, as its THE duck and represents the team. I would also like for the new stadium to be made near a river, so we could have matchday duck races before or after the game in a game day celebration, and if we were ever able to win the Ultimini we could release a massive rubber duck to celebrate it, it is also very thematic for the Greyducks as, you know, Ducks.

18) Well I have many users  in Minn and Aus that I could bring up here that are amazing and don’t get the recognition they deserve, but for this I will go with my boi Gragg9 (Anton Bruckner), he is simply amazing and does a ton for the league, with official jobs and whatnot, and is an amazing locker room man who gets everyone more involved. He for one is apart of the front office in Minn and does some sim testing, I also know he does some stuff for the Otters so he is very helpful around both leagues. He also, by himself, decided to keep track of TPE earnings in the DSFL since we were drafted, keeping track of each DSFL team and player to see how they were doing in each season he has been in the league, and he did this because he wanted to not because he got anything, what a legend. Gragg also does TPE reminders when some of us forget (like when I forgot to do the mock draft) making sure we keep up. Not only does he do all this he keeps up with everything in the quick chats, being in the top 10 in counters in the locker room and is a leader for us in the epic-rpg in the LR, he is always there on game day to support the team and I believe he is criminally underrated and deserves much more recognition and praise.

26) I have a few options that would be attractive, one would be an O-lineman, for one there are not many in the league as it isn’t really a big play position where you can see your dot pop off, which means I would be guaranteed playtime and a place on a team even if I wasn’t the most active in the league, not only this but everyone loves O-lineman, every time one appears they are wanted and are always celebrates as a player (unless the user is a arse of course) and if they manage to do anything special they get big celebrations in the locker room, not only this but I would probably be picked to a better team as bad teams would need positions of higher value to help the team while an O-lineman is a value pick (in the ISFL), being an o-lineman would also mean I can be chiller in general as I don’t have to stress about my dot making plays and can just cheer my team on game day. Another attractive pick would be a tight end, similarly there are not too many tight ends in the league so I would probably get game time for my dot to shine, and it would also allow me to play on the offence in a impact role which would be cool, and I would be able to get touchdowns which would be fun.

28) I will split this up into the DSFL teams and the ISFL teams, for the DSFL teams I would say Minn and Lon have the best branding, Minn because I’m biased (and it’s pretty good), and Lon because everything is stylish and sleek, it is clear everything from the field to the logo was designed by someone talented and someone who knew how to theme, also I’m British and a London based team is cool. For the DSFL worse I would say Norfolk, for one it is not immediately recognizable, people might not know what a seawolf is and it might confuse them, it is also confusing as for one I did not know there was a port called Norfolk so I thought it was referring to county Norfolk (in England), to avoid this confusion we should change it, also Norfolk is a stinky team so maybe we should just dissolve them instead /s, seriously though maybe changing it to a different colour scheme would be cool as Minn is already blue and we should have some variation. For the ISFL the best branding is probably Aus and Yellowknife, Aus cause once again I am biased and Yellowknife because being named the Wraiths are cool and I really like their design, and I think Baltimore could use a revamps because bird names that are not Ducks I find kinda basic and I kinda associate their current branding with failure so maybe they should change it to show their new start.

[Lime]

2.5 - SHL PT

2.5 - What team do you think has the best branding in the league? What team do you think could use a refresh? Why?

The best branding in the league is undoubtedly the Orange County Otters. Every team needs an otter league and this one is the one to measure all others against. L'Otters have a very clean, timeless logo. Combine that with a fresh color scheme that just works perfectly and makes for some awesome jerseys. This is one brand I could see never getting rebranded or refreshed because there really isn't anything to change. New GMs need only focus on winning. Another good brand in the ISFL is the Yellowknife Wraiths. While they have kind of a weird market, everything else is cool with a good logo and distinctive colors that look great in graphics or on jerseys. I'm not a huge fan of a lot of the branding in the league but even though I've made a bunch of sigs for them, the Berlin Fire Salamanders still puzzle me. That is an awful name for a team and their logo is pretty weak. I definitely think they are in need of saving and were outdone by the other expansion team in New York. The Silverbacks actually have a pretty neat cohesive branding with the art deco look that I think other teams could learn from.

2.5 - You’re in charge of entertainment for the Ultimus or Ultimini half-time show. What would you do?

In the NFL, their main event the Super Bowl has the Pepsi Half Time show. If I were in charge of the Ultimus Half Time Show, I would go very much in the same direction but have Coca Cola sponsor our Half Time Show to stick it to bepis. Our half time show would be a lot more focused on the soda though. We don't need weird performance art created by boring pop singers with egos bigger than the stadium. We just need a massive tanker of Coca Cola and we need to hose people down with it. Get B list celebs that are simps for the limelight and make them compete to see who can drink the most cola. Winner gets to perform whatever they want. We need to show the children that soda is okay. Soda should be a part of your balanced breakfast. People should love our soda. We're friendly. I'm just your good old pal Coca Cola. Remember me? We go way back. We need to replace those Gatorade containers with Coca Cola containers. Gatorade isn't good for you. It's disgusting. You don't want that. Athletes should be drinking Coke. Try all of our flavors. They're good for you. Let us into your home. Do not resist.

2.5 - Football is a game that has been going on for a while, loved by fans all over. But what if you were able to make some rule changes? Talk us through your new version of football, and what would be different and why?

Football is a super boring game. There is way too much stoppage. It should be played like hockey. They should have bigger rosters and just rotate who is on the field every few downs. It would lead to some interesting plays. Like the teams are coming off the field but what's this? The offense didn't send a QB back on. This isn't even a real formation, they're just putting out like 4 running backs. The group receives the ball and its mayhem. Which running back has the ball? They tackle them all but its nowhere to be found. That's because there's another new rule. The center sneak. The center can choose not to snap the ball and just run with it. The difference being that if he's downed the ball doesn't stop there. He has to get it to another teammate and they have to get downed. Or they other team could beat him up and steal the ball and run it back. Its very risky. In this scenario the other team recovers from the center. You won't believe what happens next. The defense fielded elite QB Suleiman Ramza. He has the ball now and he's throwing it the opposite way. Now the defense catches for the touchdown. See? Way more interesting. Anyone can score.

Total: 10 TPE

[Gumbaman]

4. “Sim gonna sim” is a popular expression in the league. Write about teams that have been graced by the sim gods and had amazing performances despite statistical odds, and/or about teams that were considered favorites but may have dealt with some bad sim luck that hampered their efforts. How much of an impact did it have on their season(s)?

“Sim is going to Sim” was the cut and clear definition of the Chicago Butcher’s season. While they had a rookie running back in Madison Hayes, they had little holes compared to other teams, that isn’t displayed in their record. They were a team that fought hard until the well, very last second. The teams that they lost to, most of them won it in the final seconds of the game. When I say final seconds, I mean final seconds. They started off their season 28 better than anyone would have thought they would. They beat the Sarasota Sailfish 38-31 in Week one. Chicago started out their season by having Mike hunt catch a touchdown from George O’Donnell for their first points of the season. Their next points in the game came late from Madison Hayes who ran two yards for a touchdown which got them to be only down by one point late in the second. Madison Hayes caught their first receiving touchdown of the game and their second touchdown of the day which was thrown by George O’Donnell which was a fifty-six yard touchdown to which the kick was good by Sam Sidekick, that touchdown put them only down by a single point again. That was the end of the second quarter.  Joshua Cambell started off the third quarter by catching a touchdown thrown by George O’Donnell which was a forty-three yard touchdown to bring them up twenty-eight to twenty. The butchers didn’t score again until the middle of the fourth quarter which was a one yard run by Baby Yoda to have the Butchers be up thirty-five to thirty-one. They would end this game by having Sam Sidekick kick a field goal to ice the game and have the final score of the game be thirty-eight to thirty-one.
Now the main game that really stands out to you when you think of how the Chicago Butchers got “Sim is going to Sim”ed, would be their game at home against the Philadelphia Liberty. It was a close game until the very end. Now you might be wondering how they got “Sim is going to Sim”ed in a close game. Well after a breakdown of the game I’ll show it to you. Even just me breaking down the game will show you how they got “Sim is going to Sim”. It’s quite easy to see in any eyes. Chicago started off this game by having their rookie running back in Madison Hayes score a two yard running touchdown with two minutes and twelve seconds left in the first to put them up seven nothing. The Liberty responded with a field goal in the last thirty seconds in the first quarter. The Chicago kicker in Sam Sidekick put them up ten to three with a field goal with eleven minutes and fifty seconds left in the second. The Liberty returned the favor in scoring by a touchdown by a nine yard run by Sam Torenson to even the game at ten to ten. Doy Fieri made an amazing play which was an interception return for a touchdown to put the Liberty up seventeen to ten. The Chicago Butchers responded with a forty-nine-yard field goal with ten minutes left in the third quarter to put the game at seventeen to thirteen. The Chicago rookie running back in Madison Hayes had an amazing thirty yard run touchdown to put the Chicago Butchers back up twenty to seventeen. The Liberty then decided to take the lead back by a fifteen-yard touchdown by Ryan Negs which put them up twenty-four to twenty. For most of the fourth quarter the Chicago Butchers and Philadelphia Liberty were going toe to toe in the kicking department. No pun intended if there was one. To start off this toe to toe matchup in kicking Sam Sidekick made a forty-nine yard field goal to put the Chicago Butchers down by only a single point which made the game twenty-four to twenty-three, which the lead was to the Philadelphia Liberty. Sam Sidekick put out another fantastic field goal, this time it was from thirty-four yards. He put his Chicago butcher up by two points against the Philadelphia Liberty late in the fourth quarter which had the game at twenty-six to twenty-four, with only a minute and thirty-nine seconds remaining in the game. The Philadelphia Liberty kicker who’s name is Jake Fencik put the Philadelphia Liberty back up by a single point to make the game twenty seven to twenty six with twenty two second remaining in the game. The Chicago Butcher’s kicker in Sam Sidekick put the team on his back and made a fifty five yard field goal with only five second remaining in the game. He made the score twenty nine to twenty seven. Then according to the game sheet in less than a second Flash Panda returned a kickoff for one hundred and two yards for a touchdown which gave the Philadelphia Liberty the lead with five seconds remaining in the game. The Chicago butchers lost that game within less than a second. That’s how they got “Sim is going to Sim”ed.

[Exilate]

SHL Affiliate +2.5 TPE

Task 23- +2.5 TPE
For the half time show, I would get every possible band I could on stage. People from all sorts of genres. Led Zeppelin, Cream, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Pink Floyd, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, AC/DC, Aerosmith, Queen, The Police, Fleetwood Mack, Nirvana, Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam, just to name a few. They would all have to be on a massive stage, of course. And it's gonna be loud. They're all gonna be playing at the same time. People screaming everywhere. Yeah, we might have to bring people back to life for it, but who cares? It will all be fun. It will create the loudest sound ever heard by man. Louder than anything. But it'll be fun. Anyway, they'll all be playing their classic songs. Everyone will be dancing. At the end, they will all destroy their priceless, expensive, beautiful instruments, in the name of rock and roll and entertainment. It'll be the best thing that ever will happen. And then the Tijuana Luchadores will win their 100th straight Ultimini, which had never been done before. It's going to be the best thing ever, the most important event in human history. If you can go, you have to. Nothing in your life will ever be as epic as this.

Task 19- Menu +2.5 TPE

[DatSmolBoi]

2. Tell us about your draft class. Is there anything that makes it special in comparison to other classes? Where did your fellow draftees land, how are they doing? Did anyone turn out to be an unexpected steal of that draft based on what you know today? Do you think anyone in your draft class will become a hall of famer? If you’re new to the league, how do you think your class will do? Where do you think people will get drafted to?

(Acting as my character) "In the 108th pick in the S22 Draft, the New Orleans Second Line select, Sean Snyder, WR, Portland." That's what I heard up on the TV with my family. To be honest, the fact that I was picked last in the 9th rounds kind of pissed me off but I didn't care at that moment. I was just celebrating with my family knowing that I will get another chance at playing football. The next morning I wake up and find out that no one is paying attention to me getting drafted. In fact, everyone was thinking that I would be a draft bust and get cut after 1 or 2 seasons or something. Everyone had high hopes for the big guys just because I joined late. I instantly knew that I would have to prove myself worthy to make the team, and make everyone shocked at how I made it this far. I packed my bags to New Orleans at about S24 after I stayed with the Pythons to play 2 more seasons. I was getting training in every single day always thinking to prove the critics wrong as my motivation. I get confirmed with the Second Line GM that I will be the WR2 for the team and I was pumped. People never even expected me to still be in the league. For S22 I would have 41 receptions with 646 receiving yards and 5 touchdowns which to me, was great for my rookie year! I would get to practice with Austin McCormick who was a absolute beast of a TE. I was so excited for next season as I would be more prepared and have more training in. Then I noticed something new that was happening with the league. There was a expansion draft coming up with the new teams being the Berlin Fire Salamanders and the New York Silverbacks. This was very concerning for me because I knew damn well that New Orleans will not use their protection slots for me because well, I was a replaceable WR2 at the time and the Second Line would rather use their protection slots on elite players which was perfectly fine to me. So the expansion draft comes up and Im on my couch laying down just waiting for my name to be called somewhere in there. They would have to pick me in like the later rounds right? Well surprising to me, no one took me in the expansion draft and I was pretty happy because I could still interact with the team and the LR. Then I get a text message from the new GM, and the chat went something like this "Hey Sean, so I wanted to talk to you about something and see what you think. The expansion draft is on right now and the New York Silverbacks just drafted Scorp but minutes after the draft Woelker messaged me and wanted to know if we would trade you for Scorp. While losing any teammates suck it has to happen with the expansion and I was wondering if you would be interested in playing for New York? You would have to waive your No-Trade-Clause if you want this to happen." I was not safe from expansion just yet. I put some thought into it for a couple hours and decided "Alright, I'll waive my NTC. Yall are great with your receiving corps if I’m the only wide receiver that leaves and also scorp is pretty chill and I kind of don’t want him to leave Nola. Thank you for all the great times in New Orleans!" I would say goodbye to my old team in New Orleans and take a one way plane ticket to classic New York. Sean Snyder joins the New York Silverbacks! Too bad no one still does not care. To me, I think I am still the most underrated wide receiver in the league and I want to prove that I am right here in S25. In S25, I would have 58 receptions, 966 receiving yards, and 8 touchdowns which was very big compared to my rookie season in the Second Line. I can already tell that New York was a way better fit for me in the end of the day. For the rest of the seasons ive played in ive done great with Sam Howitzer as the QB throwing the ball (I still love you Sloth) and with New York in general but in the case why am I telling you this story? Well, in the S22 Draft I believe that I was the biggest steal. Drafted in the 9th round and still being active then most people in the draft is saying a lot for me. Hell, Blake Alexander was drafted before me and he had less receiving yards! In the ISFL do I still feel like I am being underappreciated? Yes. I like to call myself the most reliable WR2 as thats what I have been my whole career so, considering I was drafted in the 9th round, I am the biggest steal in the S22 NSFL Draft.