*Pat's Super Scientific Season 31 Fantasy Rankings

Pat

It’s that time of the year again – fantasy football time – and we have only had one person release any sort of fantasy rankings. So, to do my part, I’m releasing my 100% sure-fire scientifically-backed Fantasy Football Rankings for Season 31. Follow this guide and I assure you that you will have a team. Will it be a good team? Well, let’s just say that I have finished in the top four in my fantasy group like three times now, so I’ll let you be the judge of that.

QUARTERBACK

ELITE

1. Charlemagne Cortez ARI

STRONG OPTION

2. Mike Boss Jr SAR

3. Matthias Caliban COL

4. Colby Jack YKW

5. Ryan Negs PHI

6. Dexter Zaylren BER

SLEEPERS

7. Sam Howitzer NYS

8. Jackie Daytona AUS

I LIKE TO LIVE DANGEROUSLY

9. IsHe… ReallyInvisible NOLA

10. Joliet Christ, Jr HON

ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?

11. Suleiman Ramza OCO

When ranking Quarterbacks for fantasy there are a few things you have to consider besides the individual player’s TPE level.
1) Talent level around them
2) Potential volume of passing

Taking these two factors into account, there was only one player I felt could be considered elite at the QB position, our reigning MVP, Charlemagne Cortez. Arizona may have been hit a bit by the regression monster, but make no mistake – this offense will be every bit as potent as it was last season. They have one of the best 1-2 combos in the league at Wide Receiver, they have two explosive Running Backs, and their Tight End is very strong. Cortez should be the top QB taken in every group this season, and for good reason.

The second group of QBs all have the potential to have very strong seasons statistically. The Yeti and the Wraiths may both be aging a bit on offense, but if recent history is any indicator, both of these teams will still be willing to air it out, and both are still returning strong receiving options for their QBs.

Boss Jr is in the position of having four good receiving options and not necessarily a premier rushing attack, though I don’t expect the Sailfish to be a one-dimensional team like the two listed previously.

You may laugh at Negs being listed in the top 5, but with the recent addition of Jake Fencik at WR, the Liberty now boast three Wide Receivers with over 1,000 TPE, and the defending Tight End of the Year, Borgo San Lorenzo.

I know people might question why Zaylren is listed higher than veterans Daytona and Howitzer and the simple answer is that I predict the Fire Salamanders’ offense will run through him and his three-headed-monster of WRs, Skiuuup, Hood, and Abed.

Special shout out to fellow rookie, ReallyInvisible. He is going to be our first running Quarterback in the ISFL since the sim switch, and just looking at the way the Second Line offense is built, I think we’ll see a heavy dose of him using his legs.

RUNNING BACK

ELITE

1. Cobra Kai HON

2. Goat Tank OCO

STRONG OPTION

3. Deadly Memes ARI

4. Zoe Watts AUS

5. Captain Rogers NYS

6. Tatsu Nakamura ARI

7. Tre’Darius J’Vathon SAR

8. Madison Hayes CHI

9. Jamar Lackson SJS

10. Mike Rotchburns NOLA

SLEEPERS

11. Danny King, Jr BER

12. Lonnie Jackson PHI

13. Busch Goose BAL

14. Dante King BAL

15. Drip Dad COL

16. Jay Cue Jr YKW

TURN ON INJURIES YOU COWARDS

17. John Huntsman SAR

18. Rejoignez LordreSombre CHI

19. Brandon Prince NYS

20. Jim the Vampire AUS

Running backs this season are a trip, man. Outside of the top two I have no clue who’s going to be good. Kai and Tank are the only two RBs that match all the criteria of very high TPE, no RB2 on the roster, and an underwhelming passing attack. Both Orange County and Honolulu should be feeding their backs early and often, and while that might lead to lower efficiency, this is fantasy football and we just care about the numbers.

The top two backs that fell out of the Elite level, Watts and Memes, both have the potential to be RB1 in fantasy by season’s end, but I’m not willing to stake my sterling reputation on them because both have very legitimate #2 backs behind them, Jim the Vampire and Tatsu Nakamura, respectively. I’m imagining both Arizona and Austin have both backfields somewhat split, and that keeps me from saying they’ll be the best. The one caveat is that if either team decides to feed these backs, both have real chances of ending up as the best of the season.

The rest of the options in the STRONG tier will be players that most likely won’t carry your team, but if you opt to grab a top tier QB and WR, for example, these guys will be very serviceable. One player from this list I have my eye on is Mike Rotchburns. He might not have the most TPE of the bunch, but NOLA has a very strong Offensive Line, a rookie QB, not impressive pass catchers, and no real second RB. Rotchburns should get his chances, and if he makes the most of them, he could end up a very good fantasy pick.

WIDE RECEIVER

ELITE

1. Darren Pama/Taro Raimon ARI

2. Kai Sakura/Mark Walker YKW

STRONG OPTION

3. Cmon Skiuuup BER

4. Raphael Delacour COL

5. Tugg Speedman NYS

6. Sam the Onion Man OCO

7. Jackson Kingston SAR

8. Tychondrius Hood BER

9. Videl-San AUS

10. Jake Fencik/Tsuyu Asui/Killian Chambers PHI

11. William Lim COL

12. Eleven Kendrick-Watts HON

GRAB A NAME FROM A HAT

13. Luke Quick BAL

14. Zach Crossley SJS

15. Saleem Spence SAR

16. Mike Hunt CHI

17. Cole Maxwell COL

18. Jason Radetzky NYS

19. Owen Halloway OCO

20. Quentin Crash NOLA

Wide Receivers, the most aggravating position to try and make any sort of a guess at this season. The only thing I feel like I can confidently tell you is that someone from this list is going to be the top fantasy Wide Receiver in Season 31. Who will it be? Hell, I don’t know. Why do you think I have 24 different players listed?

For the Elite tier, I listed the top WRs for both Arizona and Yellowknife. Why? Well, depending on who gets the coveted Primary Receiver designation, I feel confident one of these four ends up WR1 at the end of the season. Sakura had an historic season last year, but now that he’s a little older, Walker might step up into the WR1 space. Raimon has the contract clause that he must be WR1, but last season Pama was an efficiency monster, making the most of his chances.

The players in the Strong Options tier are just a mishmash of receivers that are either A) high TPE, B) the top option on an expected high-volume passing team, or C) the best option on an okay offense. Wide Receiver is such a stacked position this season that you honestly could wait and grab someone in the 8-12 range for your first WR and most likely be fine.

TIGHT END

ELITE

1. Adam Spencer NOLA

2. Makoa Mahi’ai BAL

3. Borgo San Lorenzo PHI

STRONG OPTION

4. Zack DiNozzo OCO

5. Zee Rechs YKW

6. Mario Messi SAR

7. Nick L. Back CHI

Now I know what you’re thinking: how is the defending Tight End of the Year, San Lorenzo, not the number one option at Tight End? The answer is simple: the Liberty brought in another high TPE Wide Receiver, meaning that there’s a likelihood that Borgo doesn’t see the same volume as he did last season. That is why I see Spencer as the top option this season in fantasy – New Orleans does not have a very good receiving corps, and Spencer is by far their best option. Pair that with a rookie QB and I could see them leaning on Spencer a lot. Another TE I’m very high on this season is Baltimore’s Makoe Mahi’ai, who I think is ready to break out this season after posting a quiet 600 yard and 7 touchdown season a year ago.

If there’s a sleeper on this list who I think has a very real chance to be a top 2 TE this season it’s most definitely Sarasota’s Mario Messi. James Angler is in the twilight of his career, and Messi is just hitting his peak. I don’t need to remind you all of the monster that Angler was for a number of seasons, and if Sarasota decides to use Messi in a similar fashion, he’s poised for a monster season.

OFFENSIVE LINE

ELITE

1. Alexander Franklin PHI

2. Adam Mellot NOLA

3. Jaja Dingdong SJS

STRONG OPTION

4. Stumpy Jones SAR

5. Bruce Buckley YKW

6. Marc Hamel NYS

SLEEPER

7. Connor Quigley AUS

8. Clark Boyd BER

9. Icebox Riposte CHI

At the top of our rankings for OL, we have Frankiln, who has posted back to back seasons of 130+ pancakes, and shows no signs of slowing down now. Joining him on the list are NOLA’s Mellot and SJS’s Dingdong, as both are maxed out in TPE and looking to hold down their team’s left side.

The players in the Strong tier are most likely going to turn in triple digit pancake seasons with ease, but the two players I really want to talk about are Clark Boyd and Icebox Riposte. I’m assuming that they will both be moving to the Left Tackle spot on their respective lines, and if they do, I think both have chances to end up in the top 5 in the league in pancakes while also not giving up any sacks on the season.

KICKERS

ELITE

1. Cade York ARI

2. Jacob Small SAR

STRONG OPTION

3. Taipan Pete NOLA

4. Dallas Dole OCO

5. Blago Kokot YKW

6. Jean-Jacques Leroy AUS

Kickers in fantasy get split into two groups: those one good offenses who should get lots of XPs and those on offenses that might struggle a lot in the red zone. York makes the Elite tier because Arizona’s offense is going to most likely be the best in the league again this season, so he should be getting a lot of easy looks. Jacob Small is my other Elite Kicker because I think Sarasota will also have an extremely good offense, but they might falter once in a while in the red zone, giving Small some chip shots to make for easy points.

TEAM DEFENSE

ELITE

1. Arizona Outlaws ARI

2. Colorado Yeti COL

3. Sarasota Sailfish SAR

STRONG OPTION

4. Berlin Fire Salamanders BER

5. Austin Copperheads AUS

6. New York Silverbacks NYS

Team Defense I decided to look at a few things – pass rush and secondary. If you search for those two qualities, it’s easy to see why these three teams are all in the Elite tier. Arizona boasts the two top TPE players in the entire league and both are at Cornerback. They also brought in Season 30 Safety of the Year, Steven Wadham, who adds another gear to their defense. Pair that with a very strong front seven, and I expect the Outlaws to put up a lot of points on defense.

The Yeti and Sailfish share similar makeups on defense – strong linebackers and secondary. A big part of the defensive scoring is turnovers and Defensive Touchdowns, and those are impossible to predict. What can be easier to gauge is sacks, and the Yeti and Sailfish has been doing that with the best of them for years now.