09-10-2022, 12:49 PM
(This post was last modified: 09-13-2022, 01:03 PM by dude_man. Edited 1 time in total.)
The official retirement post can be found here. This following became longer than anticipated, and I want all the monies that it is worth.
News Bulletin - “Sam ‘the Onion Man’ is ending his promotional onion sales with ISFL. He will be ceasing any business with ISFL at the end of S37. If you are a fan of Sam’s onions you may contact Sam himself and make a personal order.”
So yeah Sam will be done playing wide receiver and any other positions at the end of this season, S37. Sam is my second player, he was created 1 year and 8ish months ago. My first player was Walt Green who was Baltimore’s star safety S15 through S26, Walt Green retired 1 year and 9 months after he was created. I am confused and bewildered that both of my players lasted roughly the same amount of time. According to the tracker Sam topped out at 1274 TPE and Green topped out at 1355 TPE. Despite the only 81 TPE difference, Green felt like a more successful, impactful, and longer playing player than Sam, whom I feel falls tad short of my hopes when I first created him. Over the course of 1 year and 9 months, Green was drafted to NSFL in S15 with an immediate call up and was rostered through S26. A total of 12 playing seasons, but we’ll say 11 because Green recorded 0 stats in his final season. Over the course of 1 year and 8 months, Sam was created S26 at the trade deadline and drafted to ISFL S28 with immediate call up with S37 his last, a total of 10 seasons.
It is completely wild to me how different the TPE gains as a league were during each player’s career. According to the Tracker, there are 35ish retired players from classes S21 through S26 whose highest TPE total is over 1462, with 15 players at 1500+. At 1461 is S12 player Errol Maddox, the highest of any player created before S21 class. Comparing the two generations my players came from, the highest earning S15 player is Nero Alexander with 1426 TPE. The S28 class has 6 players who earned over 1426 TPE. Green was the 4th highest earning player of the S15 class, and during his career was on the Top 25 TPE list. Sam is the 15th highest earning player of the S28 class, and probably doesn’t even make the Top 75 (this is a complete guess, I would not be surprised if this is even closer to Top 100). I feel a deep dive on the topic “Changes in available TPE during league history” would be a great read, but that’s for someone else to do.
Sam’s career statistics are lackluster. At the time of this posting, Sam played 154 games and recorded 782 Receptions, 9616 Yards, 62 TDs, 34 KR, 712 KR Yards, 17 PR, 119 PR Yards, and 244 Pancakes. Currently, Sam is projected to finish just short of 10K career yards. I believe Sam has only 1 Pro Bowl, and zero awards. However, I believe Sam does have some exciting accomplishments that should earn him entry to the “Meta Player Hall of Fame”.
1. Sam played for 6 different teams, sadly 1 team shy of half the league - OCO, HON, BAL, AUS, SJS & BER. I don’t have any hard data, and I’m currently in no position to gather the data to prove the following statement, but I am 85% confident this is a league record: “Most Teams Played For by a Single Player”.
2. With Austin in S34, in Week 01 Sam was the first player since Damien Kroetch in S03 Week 5 to catch a TD from two different QBs in a single game. Sam is the first player in league history to catch a TD from two different QBs in a single game twice in a single season: S34 Week 01 and Week 08.
3. Sam has a 1-to-1 ratio of making playoffs and winning the Ultimus. The only season Sam ever made playoffs was S33 with Baltimore when Baltimore won the Ultimus. The one and only season I returned to the team I used to GM, the team improved from a 5-11 record in S32 to an 11-5 record and Ultimus in S33. Baltimore dropped back to a 6-10 record in S34 when I left.
4. For the rest of the teams Sam played for, they on average suffered a worse record for rostering him. S31 was Sam’s first FA, after heavy recruitment by several GMs, he chose to return to OCO. In S30 OCO finished just outside of playoffs with a 9-7 record. S31 with Sam returning OCO suffered a miserable 4-12 season. For S32 Sam left OCO and signed with HON. In S31 HON had a 9-7 record and won Ultimus. In S32 with Sam, HON finished the season losing 6 of our 7 final games and missed the playoffs. We already talked about S33 with Baltimore, the lone team who enjoyed a positive performance increase with Sam. In S34 Sam joined Austin, we finished 7-9 with no playoff appearance after the previous season Austin had a 8-8 playoff appearance in S33 without Sam. S35 SJS did only half a game better with Sam than they did in S34 without Sam. S35 before Sam, Berlin finished 8-8 missing the playoffs due to head to head records in a three way tie, while in S36 with Sam Berlin finished 2-14. Lastly, SJS enjoyed a fabulous 10-6 playoff season without Sam in S36, and now in S37 SJS currently has a losing record at 4-6.
All the Tags and Thank Yous Section:
Firstly I want to thank Norfolk, specifically @ConnorM123 and @Jimi64. It was a big class with lots of new users and there I was, a recreate insisting I’d only be in the DSFL for one season. The only user who fell farther in the draft than me was infinite. lol that guy was taken after me!?!? DSFL GMs be wildin. It was a lot of fun seeing where Scorp, Isa, Bex, Teyon, and many others started their ISFL experience.
Thank you to all of OCO for drafting me. The entire locker room was very welcoming and was lots of fun. @Blasoon and @Memento Mori and @speculadora, I probably didn’t live up to expectations, but thank you for giving Sam his first home.
To HON @124715 I finally got to play with you! @siddhus and @MMFLEX thanks for listening to numbers and signing me for a season.
To BAL @infinitempg @bex and I was the best FA package ever. I think it was @King Jellyfish who made onion hawk, the best emoji in team history. Love you @Frick_Nasty. Thank you to @Trempale for reaching out about Sam every FA. @Bigred83 @shadyshoelace @TomHanks @Tomasnz I am really happy I had the joy of winning an Ultimus with you guys. Specifically to TH and tomasnz, hope you guys are good where ever you are.
To AUS @Mooty99 and @unconfident were willing to bring me into Austin just because I thought it would be fun to catch TDs from both QBs. Most of Mooty’s season tests indicated it’d be really lucky if it happened even once. Then we went and did it for all three WRs!! @JKortesi81 @Patey
To SJS @RussDrivesTheBus you’ve been wanting to bring me to SJS for the longest time, you pestered me more than any other GM every FA. Sorry, Sam’s curse is keeping you out of the playoffs. @woelkers you are a handsome fella, have you killed the plant yet? Also, I feel the rest of the league should be aware that half of the Casino employees are from SJS including both GMs. Money Laundering.
To BER @Dewalt27 you too are a handsome fella. Sorry for making you wait so long to sign Sam. Have you killed your plant yet?
@xtitanxmvpx sorry I never got to play with you. Think that's my only major regret with Sam. #radioactives
Hopefully, I got all those tags correct. And sorry to any and every GM or player I didn't tag. If we were ever teammates or you reached out to me during FA, thank you for being active in the league.
I don’t know when but I will recreate in the future. I promise my next player will be a lot more team loyal.
News Bulletin - “Sam ‘the Onion Man’ is ending his promotional onion sales with ISFL. He will be ceasing any business with ISFL at the end of S37. If you are a fan of Sam’s onions you may contact Sam himself and make a personal order.”
So yeah Sam will be done playing wide receiver and any other positions at the end of this season, S37. Sam is my second player, he was created 1 year and 8ish months ago. My first player was Walt Green who was Baltimore’s star safety S15 through S26, Walt Green retired 1 year and 9 months after he was created. I am confused and bewildered that both of my players lasted roughly the same amount of time. According to the tracker Sam topped out at 1274 TPE and Green topped out at 1355 TPE. Despite the only 81 TPE difference, Green felt like a more successful, impactful, and longer playing player than Sam, whom I feel falls tad short of my hopes when I first created him. Over the course of 1 year and 9 months, Green was drafted to NSFL in S15 with an immediate call up and was rostered through S26. A total of 12 playing seasons, but we’ll say 11 because Green recorded 0 stats in his final season. Over the course of 1 year and 8 months, Sam was created S26 at the trade deadline and drafted to ISFL S28 with immediate call up with S37 his last, a total of 10 seasons.
It is completely wild to me how different the TPE gains as a league were during each player’s career. According to the Tracker, there are 35ish retired players from classes S21 through S26 whose highest TPE total is over 1462, with 15 players at 1500+. At 1461 is S12 player Errol Maddox, the highest of any player created before S21 class. Comparing the two generations my players came from, the highest earning S15 player is Nero Alexander with 1426 TPE. The S28 class has 6 players who earned over 1426 TPE. Green was the 4th highest earning player of the S15 class, and during his career was on the Top 25 TPE list. Sam is the 15th highest earning player of the S28 class, and probably doesn’t even make the Top 75 (this is a complete guess, I would not be surprised if this is even closer to Top 100). I feel a deep dive on the topic “Changes in available TPE during league history” would be a great read, but that’s for someone else to do.
Sam’s career statistics are lackluster. At the time of this posting, Sam played 154 games and recorded 782 Receptions, 9616 Yards, 62 TDs, 34 KR, 712 KR Yards, 17 PR, 119 PR Yards, and 244 Pancakes. Currently, Sam is projected to finish just short of 10K career yards. I believe Sam has only 1 Pro Bowl, and zero awards. However, I believe Sam does have some exciting accomplishments that should earn him entry to the “Meta Player Hall of Fame”.
1. Sam played for 6 different teams, sadly 1 team shy of half the league - OCO, HON, BAL, AUS, SJS & BER. I don’t have any hard data, and I’m currently in no position to gather the data to prove the following statement, but I am 85% confident this is a league record: “Most Teams Played For by a Single Player”.
2. With Austin in S34, in Week 01 Sam was the first player since Damien Kroetch in S03 Week 5 to catch a TD from two different QBs in a single game. Sam is the first player in league history to catch a TD from two different QBs in a single game twice in a single season: S34 Week 01 and Week 08.
3. Sam has a 1-to-1 ratio of making playoffs and winning the Ultimus. The only season Sam ever made playoffs was S33 with Baltimore when Baltimore won the Ultimus. The one and only season I returned to the team I used to GM, the team improved from a 5-11 record in S32 to an 11-5 record and Ultimus in S33. Baltimore dropped back to a 6-10 record in S34 when I left.
4. For the rest of the teams Sam played for, they on average suffered a worse record for rostering him. S31 was Sam’s first FA, after heavy recruitment by several GMs, he chose to return to OCO. In S30 OCO finished just outside of playoffs with a 9-7 record. S31 with Sam returning OCO suffered a miserable 4-12 season. For S32 Sam left OCO and signed with HON. In S31 HON had a 9-7 record and won Ultimus. In S32 with Sam, HON finished the season losing 6 of our 7 final games and missed the playoffs. We already talked about S33 with Baltimore, the lone team who enjoyed a positive performance increase with Sam. In S34 Sam joined Austin, we finished 7-9 with no playoff appearance after the previous season Austin had a 8-8 playoff appearance in S33 without Sam. S35 SJS did only half a game better with Sam than they did in S34 without Sam. S35 before Sam, Berlin finished 8-8 missing the playoffs due to head to head records in a three way tie, while in S36 with Sam Berlin finished 2-14. Lastly, SJS enjoyed a fabulous 10-6 playoff season without Sam in S36, and now in S37 SJS currently has a losing record at 4-6.
All the Tags and Thank Yous Section:
Firstly I want to thank Norfolk, specifically @ConnorM123 and @Jimi64. It was a big class with lots of new users and there I was, a recreate insisting I’d only be in the DSFL for one season. The only user who fell farther in the draft than me was infinite. lol that guy was taken after me!?!? DSFL GMs be wildin. It was a lot of fun seeing where Scorp, Isa, Bex, Teyon, and many others started their ISFL experience.
Thank you to all of OCO for drafting me. The entire locker room was very welcoming and was lots of fun. @Blasoon and @Memento Mori and @speculadora, I probably didn’t live up to expectations, but thank you for giving Sam his first home.
To HON @124715 I finally got to play with you! @siddhus and @MMFLEX thanks for listening to numbers and signing me for a season.
To BAL @infinitempg @bex and I was the best FA package ever. I think it was @King Jellyfish who made onion hawk, the best emoji in team history. Love you @Frick_Nasty. Thank you to @Trempale for reaching out about Sam every FA. @Bigred83 @shadyshoelace @TomHanks @Tomasnz I am really happy I had the joy of winning an Ultimus with you guys. Specifically to TH and tomasnz, hope you guys are good where ever you are.
To AUS @Mooty99 and @unconfident were willing to bring me into Austin just because I thought it would be fun to catch TDs from both QBs. Most of Mooty’s season tests indicated it’d be really lucky if it happened even once. Then we went and did it for all three WRs!! @JKortesi81 @Patey
To SJS @RussDrivesTheBus you’ve been wanting to bring me to SJS for the longest time, you pestered me more than any other GM every FA. Sorry, Sam’s curse is keeping you out of the playoffs. @woelkers you are a handsome fella, have you killed the plant yet? Also, I feel the rest of the league should be aware that half of the Casino employees are from SJS including both GMs. Money Laundering.
To BER @Dewalt27 you too are a handsome fella. Sorry for making you wait so long to sign Sam. Have you killed your plant yet?
@xtitanxmvpx sorry I never got to play with you. Think that's my only major regret with Sam. #radioactives
Hopefully, I got all those tags correct. And sorry to any and every GM or player I didn't tag. If we were ever teammates or you reached out to me during FA, thank you for being active in the league.
I don’t know when but I will recreate in the future. I promise my next player will be a lot more team loyal.
![[Image: 74043_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/74043_s.gif)
Jurisprudence Jones, OL ![[Image: cYhSwFY.png]](https://i.imgur.com/cYhSwFY.png)
![[Image: Trempale2.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/Trempale2.gif)
![[Image: 012p.png]](https://i.postimg.cc/3J542q1C/012p.png)
![[Image: 55457_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/55457_s.gif)
