04-13-2023, 05:48 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-21-2023, 01:48 AM by xenosthelegend. Edited 1 time in total.)
Disclaimer: I have no idea what I am talking about
INTRODUCTION
As you all know, it is double media season, and so of course I will be making the most objectively correct analysis of this season and predict what will happen this next season because I am broke and need to feed my starving children. Let us all watch as I make the most unfounded predictions based off these objectively correct reflections of the 40th season of the DSFL. This is my second time writing this article as I accidently wiped it all away earlier, so my article will be 2x more correct for all of you!
1. The Bondi Beach Buccaneers
SEASON REVIEW
The Bondi Beach Buccaneers were the feel good story of the season after being a rebuilding team that last couple seasons. Props to Thor and the players for their unprecedented turnaround. They easily coasted to the postseason and got the job done in the conference finals against the Seawolves. In the Ultimini, they finished strong barely escaping the Portland Pythons with a second half comeback win. The Buccaneers were dominant on both sides of the ball boasting both the best offense and defense in the league averaging 30.9 points per game while allowing only a 22 points per game. Smokin' Jay has had an incredibly efficient season throwing for 3587 yards and 36 touchdowns to 7 interceptions. On the other hand, the defensive unit was incredibly effective at defending the pass leading the league with a combined 94 PDs. The Bondi Beach Buccaneers were far and away the most dominant team an much deserved their win in the ultimini.
PREDICTION
The HO of the Bondi Beach Buccaneers will be aiming to prove that this last season was not a fluke of the sim. All the team needs to do is fill the holes that will open due to players moving up in order to maintain their new found culture of winning. Despite this seemingly simple task (it's not), I predict that the Buccaneers will regress slightly. They will still make the playoffs but will fall short in the conference finals.
2. Portland Pythons
SEASON REVIEW
The Portland Pythons were the only other example of what would be called a complete team in the DSFL this season. Despite their rocky start of 1-3 in the beginning of the season, they got hot down the stretch dominating their way to an 8-6 record steamrolling the London Royals in the playoffs and just barely falling short in the Ultimini due to a second half collapse. The Pythons were a force to be reckoned with this season that could have easily won it all if they had a play or two in their favor. They both the second best offense and defense in the DSFL averaging 30.3 points scored per game and 22.2 points allowed by the defense per game. Donovan Winters III had a dominant game manager season after shaking off the rust the first few games throwing for 3934 yards and 33 touchdowns to 12 interceptions. Congratulations to his performance this season that punched his ticket to the hall of fame. On the other side of the ball is where the crowning jewel of this team lies as the defensive front wreaked havoc on opposing quarterbacks for a league leading 60 sacks as Bruce White ties the DSFL single season sack record.
PREDICTION
This season, Donovan Winters III will be suiting up for what will likely be his last season as a Portland Python, which he will be returning with a chip on his shoulder as he will be seeking to return to the Ultimini one last time. I predict that the Portland Pythons will return with a vengeance this season being the team to beat as they steamroll their way to the Ultimini.
3. Norfolk Seawolves
SEASON REVIEW
The Norfolk Seawolves were one of the weirder teams this season as they boast the best record in the league, but were rarely dominant in the games they played. They showed grit in each game winning close in most cases, but this is mostly due to the offensive struggles of the team for most of the season. For a contending team, the offense struggled to put points on the board being fifth in the league in points averaging 24.1 points per game while averaging 24.7 points allowed on the defensive side of the ball, which means that they ended the season with a negative point differential of -8 despite having a 10-4 record. Honestly impressive. The defensive unit was the driving force of this team boasting the second best rush defense in the league and a solid secondary at fourth.
PREDICTION
Despite their offensive woes that ultimately kept them out of the Ultimini this season, the unit showed flashes of brilliance at the beginning of the season in wins against the Luchadores and the Dallas Birddogs. By drafting key pieces on the offensive side of the ball this season and maintaining their talented defense, I predict that the Norfolk Seawolves will get over the hump with a completed roster and punch their ticket to the Ultimini.
4. London Royals
SEASON REVIEW
The London Royals were the poster child of a simply above average team not quite ready to contend. They took care of business beating up on rebuilding and not contending teams while struggling against playoff teams this season. They have a talented offense with some intimidating weapons putting up the third most points in the league averaging 29.5 points per game. Willier Miller had a monster season throwing for 4320 yards and 31 touchdowns to 10 interceptions. The problem with this team is that they had the worst defense in the entire DSFL allowing 30.1 points per game. Despite their respectable 8-6 record, they had a negative point differential of -8 while their rival, the Portland Pythons had the same record with a point differential of +113. If this team hopes to contend, this defense will have to be rebuilt from the ground up in order to support their rapidly aging offense.
PREDICTION
The last few seasons, the London Royals have been flip flopping between rebuilding and being above average failing in the playoffs. This last season, they were the latter. I predict that they will continue to follow this pattern and regress once again to being a rebuilding team looking towards success in the future.
5. Minnesota Grey Ducks
SEASON REVIEW
This season, the Minnesota Grey Ducks were another team that had a rocky start on the season, but unfortunately unlike the Pythons, it was too devastating to recover from in the second half of the season as the had a final record of 6-8. Despite the lost season, the Ducks showed hear towards the end of the season with impressive wins against the Portland Pythons in week 8 and the Bondi Beach Buccaneers in week 14. Unfortunately, the offense was seventh in the league in points scoring a ghastly 23.4 points per game while their defense allowed a solid 26.5 points per game.
PREDICTION
The Grey Ducks are very much still in the midst of a rebuild, but have still flashed talent from time to time. I predict that we will get more of the same next season being a middling team that misses the playoffs. I think it will be some time before we see the Grey Ducks truly competing once again.
6. Dallas Birddogs
SEASON REVIEW
The Dallas Birddogs were essentially the other side of the coin with the Minnesota Grey Ducks. They were a middle of the pack non-contending team with flipped stats from the Grey Ducks. They too showed life towards the end of the season with a three game winning streak from week 11 to week 13. Their offense was comfortably middle of the pack averaging 24.4 points per game. NVADV RAINN has quietly improved with each season and this one is no exception as he threw for 3172 yards and 29 touchdowns to 7 interceptions. The Birddogs' defensive unit struggled immensely allowing 29.2 points per game scoring poorly in both pass and rush defense. Despite all this, the Birddogs have managed to hover close to .500.
PREDICTION
The Dallas Birddogs have struggled to get back to the Ultimini these last few season having predominantly middling seasons. This next season, I predict that the Birddogs will opt for a rebuild in order to look towards competing in future seasons.
7. Tijuana Luchadores
SEASON REVIEW
The Tijuana Luchadores are far from the perennial Ultimini contenders they once were and unfortunately this season is no exception. There was a lot of hype surrounding this team at the beginning of the season as the Luchadores looked poised for a turnaround with their rookie quarterback, Lloyd Bannings, who led the team to a 3-1 record in the beginning of the season with impressive wins against the Dallas Birddogs, London Royals, and the Portland Pythons. Unfortunately, this proved to be a flash in the pan as the team seemingly flamed out as the season progressed despite looking like a contender in the first half. Despite this, Lloyd Bannings proved to have a more than respectable rookie season throwing 3507 yards and 28 touchdowns to 15 interceptions. The offensive unit as a whole was unfortunately the worst in the league averaging 22.8 points in the league while the defense was subpar allowing 27.4 points per game. The biggest concern of all is that the team started off strong, but seemed to struggle when it came to improving and keeping up with other teams as the season progressed. Something to think about I suppose.
PREDICTION
Lloyd Bannings has shown much promise this season despite his turnover woes. I do not believe that this team will be contending this season, but could be poised to make a run next season with strategic drafting and building around Bannings. I predict that the team will have a similar record with statistical improvement as their current conference is simply too competitive right now.
8. Kansas City Coyotes
SEASON REVIEW
Unfortunately, there is not much good to be said about the Kansas City Coyotes this season as they were handily the worst team in the league this season, but I will say that they played better than their record as they were sixth in the league averaging 23.8 offensive points per game while placing fifth in the league in points allowed averaging 26.9 points. The identity of this team was mainly found in their rushing offense with Elliot Berry being the rushing leader at 1309 yards and 15 touchdowns. The Coyotes have also been developing the intriguing quarterback Jake Jefferson, who penciled in 7 all purpose touchdowns and 848 all purpose yards in the games he played. The defense also played admirably despite being a rebuild season having the best pass defense in the league and a middle of the back rush defense. It will be interesting to watch where this team goes from here.
PREDICTION
The Kansas City Coyotes are in my opinion, the most intriguing team going forward, which leads me to possibly my wildest prediction on this list. I predict that this team will make a significant jump this season as Jake Jefferson leads their team to the playoffs falling short to the Portland Pythons.
INTRODUCTION
As you all know, it is double media season, and so of course I will be making the most objectively correct analysis of this season and predict what will happen this next season because I am broke and need to feed my starving children. Let us all watch as I make the most unfounded predictions based off these objectively correct reflections of the 40th season of the DSFL. This is my second time writing this article as I accidently wiped it all away earlier, so my article will be 2x more correct for all of you!
1. The Bondi Beach Buccaneers
SEASON REVIEW
The Bondi Beach Buccaneers were the feel good story of the season after being a rebuilding team that last couple seasons. Props to Thor and the players for their unprecedented turnaround. They easily coasted to the postseason and got the job done in the conference finals against the Seawolves. In the Ultimini, they finished strong barely escaping the Portland Pythons with a second half comeback win. The Buccaneers were dominant on both sides of the ball boasting both the best offense and defense in the league averaging 30.9 points per game while allowing only a 22 points per game. Smokin' Jay has had an incredibly efficient season throwing for 3587 yards and 36 touchdowns to 7 interceptions. On the other hand, the defensive unit was incredibly effective at defending the pass leading the league with a combined 94 PDs. The Bondi Beach Buccaneers were far and away the most dominant team an much deserved their win in the ultimini.
PREDICTION
The HO of the Bondi Beach Buccaneers will be aiming to prove that this last season was not a fluke of the sim. All the team needs to do is fill the holes that will open due to players moving up in order to maintain their new found culture of winning. Despite this seemingly simple task (it's not), I predict that the Buccaneers will regress slightly. They will still make the playoffs but will fall short in the conference finals.
2. Portland Pythons
SEASON REVIEW
The Portland Pythons were the only other example of what would be called a complete team in the DSFL this season. Despite their rocky start of 1-3 in the beginning of the season, they got hot down the stretch dominating their way to an 8-6 record steamrolling the London Royals in the playoffs and just barely falling short in the Ultimini due to a second half collapse. The Pythons were a force to be reckoned with this season that could have easily won it all if they had a play or two in their favor. They both the second best offense and defense in the DSFL averaging 30.3 points scored per game and 22.2 points allowed by the defense per game. Donovan Winters III had a dominant game manager season after shaking off the rust the first few games throwing for 3934 yards and 33 touchdowns to 12 interceptions. Congratulations to his performance this season that punched his ticket to the hall of fame. On the other side of the ball is where the crowning jewel of this team lies as the defensive front wreaked havoc on opposing quarterbacks for a league leading 60 sacks as Bruce White ties the DSFL single season sack record.
PREDICTION
This season, Donovan Winters III will be suiting up for what will likely be his last season as a Portland Python, which he will be returning with a chip on his shoulder as he will be seeking to return to the Ultimini one last time. I predict that the Portland Pythons will return with a vengeance this season being the team to beat as they steamroll their way to the Ultimini.
3. Norfolk Seawolves
SEASON REVIEW
The Norfolk Seawolves were one of the weirder teams this season as they boast the best record in the league, but were rarely dominant in the games they played. They showed grit in each game winning close in most cases, but this is mostly due to the offensive struggles of the team for most of the season. For a contending team, the offense struggled to put points on the board being fifth in the league in points averaging 24.1 points per game while averaging 24.7 points allowed on the defensive side of the ball, which means that they ended the season with a negative point differential of -8 despite having a 10-4 record. Honestly impressive. The defensive unit was the driving force of this team boasting the second best rush defense in the league and a solid secondary at fourth.
PREDICTION
Despite their offensive woes that ultimately kept them out of the Ultimini this season, the unit showed flashes of brilliance at the beginning of the season in wins against the Luchadores and the Dallas Birddogs. By drafting key pieces on the offensive side of the ball this season and maintaining their talented defense, I predict that the Norfolk Seawolves will get over the hump with a completed roster and punch their ticket to the Ultimini.
4. London Royals
SEASON REVIEW
The London Royals were the poster child of a simply above average team not quite ready to contend. They took care of business beating up on rebuilding and not contending teams while struggling against playoff teams this season. They have a talented offense with some intimidating weapons putting up the third most points in the league averaging 29.5 points per game. Willier Miller had a monster season throwing for 4320 yards and 31 touchdowns to 10 interceptions. The problem with this team is that they had the worst defense in the entire DSFL allowing 30.1 points per game. Despite their respectable 8-6 record, they had a negative point differential of -8 while their rival, the Portland Pythons had the same record with a point differential of +113. If this team hopes to contend, this defense will have to be rebuilt from the ground up in order to support their rapidly aging offense.
PREDICTION
The last few seasons, the London Royals have been flip flopping between rebuilding and being above average failing in the playoffs. This last season, they were the latter. I predict that they will continue to follow this pattern and regress once again to being a rebuilding team looking towards success in the future.
5. Minnesota Grey Ducks
SEASON REVIEW
This season, the Minnesota Grey Ducks were another team that had a rocky start on the season, but unfortunately unlike the Pythons, it was too devastating to recover from in the second half of the season as the had a final record of 6-8. Despite the lost season, the Ducks showed hear towards the end of the season with impressive wins against the Portland Pythons in week 8 and the Bondi Beach Buccaneers in week 14. Unfortunately, the offense was seventh in the league in points scoring a ghastly 23.4 points per game while their defense allowed a solid 26.5 points per game.
PREDICTION
The Grey Ducks are very much still in the midst of a rebuild, but have still flashed talent from time to time. I predict that we will get more of the same next season being a middling team that misses the playoffs. I think it will be some time before we see the Grey Ducks truly competing once again.
6. Dallas Birddogs
SEASON REVIEW
The Dallas Birddogs were essentially the other side of the coin with the Minnesota Grey Ducks. They were a middle of the pack non-contending team with flipped stats from the Grey Ducks. They too showed life towards the end of the season with a three game winning streak from week 11 to week 13. Their offense was comfortably middle of the pack averaging 24.4 points per game. NVADV RAINN has quietly improved with each season and this one is no exception as he threw for 3172 yards and 29 touchdowns to 7 interceptions. The Birddogs' defensive unit struggled immensely allowing 29.2 points per game scoring poorly in both pass and rush defense. Despite all this, the Birddogs have managed to hover close to .500.
PREDICTION
The Dallas Birddogs have struggled to get back to the Ultimini these last few season having predominantly middling seasons. This next season, I predict that the Birddogs will opt for a rebuild in order to look towards competing in future seasons.
7. Tijuana Luchadores
SEASON REVIEW
The Tijuana Luchadores are far from the perennial Ultimini contenders they once were and unfortunately this season is no exception. There was a lot of hype surrounding this team at the beginning of the season as the Luchadores looked poised for a turnaround with their rookie quarterback, Lloyd Bannings, who led the team to a 3-1 record in the beginning of the season with impressive wins against the Dallas Birddogs, London Royals, and the Portland Pythons. Unfortunately, this proved to be a flash in the pan as the team seemingly flamed out as the season progressed despite looking like a contender in the first half. Despite this, Lloyd Bannings proved to have a more than respectable rookie season throwing 3507 yards and 28 touchdowns to 15 interceptions. The offensive unit as a whole was unfortunately the worst in the league averaging 22.8 points in the league while the defense was subpar allowing 27.4 points per game. The biggest concern of all is that the team started off strong, but seemed to struggle when it came to improving and keeping up with other teams as the season progressed. Something to think about I suppose.
PREDICTION
Lloyd Bannings has shown much promise this season despite his turnover woes. I do not believe that this team will be contending this season, but could be poised to make a run next season with strategic drafting and building around Bannings. I predict that the team will have a similar record with statistical improvement as their current conference is simply too competitive right now.
8. Kansas City Coyotes
SEASON REVIEW
Unfortunately, there is not much good to be said about the Kansas City Coyotes this season as they were handily the worst team in the league this season, but I will say that they played better than their record as they were sixth in the league averaging 23.8 offensive points per game while placing fifth in the league in points allowed averaging 26.9 points. The identity of this team was mainly found in their rushing offense with Elliot Berry being the rushing leader at 1309 yards and 15 touchdowns. The Coyotes have also been developing the intriguing quarterback Jake Jefferson, who penciled in 7 all purpose touchdowns and 848 all purpose yards in the games he played. The defense also played admirably despite being a rebuild season having the best pass defense in the league and a middle of the back rush defense. It will be interesting to watch where this team goes from here.
PREDICTION
The Kansas City Coyotes are in my opinion, the most intriguing team going forward, which leads me to possibly my wildest prediction on this list. I predict that this team will make a significant jump this season as Jake Jefferson leads their team to the playoffs falling short to the Portland Pythons.