The New York Silverbacks locker room needs a big update, and I believe this team deserves it as we just beat the franchise's most wins in a season. Well, where do we start? I've done some digging around and looking to see what other locker rooms look like and I think one of the first things we add to the facility is a sign that has one of those awesome phrases on it like "Be great today" but maybe ours should be like "Ooga Booga" because you know...Monke. Second, on that list is bathrooms, I want to feel like I'm pooping in Buckingham Palace while I'm in the locker room, I'd like Black and Green tiled walls, fancy toilets with bidets, and those dope-ass hand dryers. And last I think we deserve some sick gym equipment upgrades, not that the stuff that is provided to us already isn't up to standards but I feel like it would give us that little bit of edge at the end of that day when it comes time to training.
Anchor: It's a new era for the New Orleans Secondline with the city approving new stadium renovations for the upcoming season. Our sports reporter has the story.
Reporter: Local fans were given the opportunity to vote for their most wanted stadium amenities as 400 million of the renovations will come from taxpayers. What won out were ideas like; improved restaurant and food choices; more bathrooms, more parking opportunities near the stadium, and a team museum and hall of fame. We were able to catch up with player and member of the stadium development team Johnny Delusional with a look at where the construction costs are going.
Delusional: Yeah we are spending 100 million on a parking structure that will be both affordable and available to fit all the vehicles for a game, and the rest will go toward stadium amenities for fans, with no money towards the team at this time.
Reporter: Delusional and the team believes that this money has to go to the fans who have supported them through this tough stretch of seasons.
Anchor: With the team missing the playoffs for another season, the stadium development team will have an extra couple of weeks to update the stadium before the preseason of season 44.
If New Orleans was given the funds to improve the stadium by the taxpayers of the state then Sonny Johnson if given a say in how the monies an allocation would have to be spent on designing and installing hospitality boxes around the entire span of the stadium to improve the game day experience for fans.
Of course there would need to be different tiers of boxes to generate significant return on investment for the state but Johnson would ensure there was a clause that children charities receive a certain number of free boxes per game and state schools were given a certain number of boxers per season.
Johnson would also invest in game day technology to also boost fan experience, so screens located all across the stadium to allow fans, no matter where their seats, to have coverage of the game as if they were sat at home watching it on tv, just incase they might of missed something.
the yeti stadium is a monument to the natural beauty of Colorado and it's scenery already, yet i believe we could do more to take full advantage of the location.
With my now-unlimited budget i'd completely knock out the stands that face the picturesque mountains and rebuild them in such a way that everyone can view the outside from the inside of the stadium proper. This would be an excellent way to highlight both our hometown advantage and add a local flair to the taxpayers wasted dollars.
of course, we'd have to find a way to not have the clear glass act as a magnifying glass when the sun hits it but that's a problem for the architect. I'm just the idea man. I'd also spent the rest of my money making the visitors locker room as uncomfortable as possible. Loose legos everywhere, chairs unbalanced, stale food, the temperature of the showers uncomfortably cold then uncomfortably hot. That sort of thing.
We can have some real fun with this much money in Bondi Beach. I think the first order of business would be to mimic the stadium of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers by incorporating a pirate ship into the design of the building, but that only just scratches the surface of what I would like to do. We are, after all, Bondi Beach, and I think that means our current turf just does not do the trick. I would instead take things to the next level by bringing truckloads and truckloads of sand into the building and using that to replace our current turf. I think this will be more true to the aesthetic we are going for, and will also serve to make games more interesting. We can also replace sideline benches with beach chairs, beach towels, and even some rocks that may or may not be functional as seats. Then all we have to do is draw lines in the sand for the yard markers and mark a couple Xs in the end zones, and we have a fun new concept for a football field.
When Patrick Uncertain arrived in Norfolk he quickly realized there wasn’t much to do there. So I’d want to use the money to make our stadium an entertainment hub, one of the biggest ones on earth that is. So 1stly I’d use my money to build a Time Machine, then go back in time to talk to Walt Disney and get him to make Disney World in Norfolk, and inventing technology while I’m at it thus making it in Norfolk in the real world. Along with that I’d add an indoor zoo and an indoor aquarium to our stadium. To do tbis of course I’d have to get renovations making our stadium the biggest of all time, but thats sooo boring to talk about. I’d also add a bunch if stuff to the locker room, with gyms for every sport imaginable and also a gaming room with every gaming console ever made.