Power rankings indicate the biases of the person who is ranking the teams, but does it really turn out that way? It’s why we shitpost.
For the record, the rigged index has the Outlaws as #1.
1. Arizona Outlaws (9-0)
They aren't going to lose to anyone for the rest of the season. If you're smart you're just gonna relax, grab the lube, and let it happen; you can contact the local authorities afterward. Did you know that @ErMurazor doesn't actually rig the sims? It's @4D Chess who actually waits til Er goes to sleep and then comes in the house from his garage and fixes the results. Also, did you know that @4D Chess lives in Er's garage? It shows true team bonding if you ask me.
2. Orange County Otters (6-3)
The god damn Otters, if the Outlaws weren't around I'd assume the Otters were the ones rigging this thing. Nah jk, Boss is a legit superstar and they have a cadre of wideouts that makes the rest of the league jealous, and he stole my Burny baby from me, that cannot be forgiven. Anyway, their defense hasn't been as strong this season but they drafted well and are poised to be a strong team for several season to come as long as they can afford Boss.
3. Baltimore Hawks (6-3)
Kyubee may be scrub in name but he is definitely anything but in play. He's a solid starter without any real flaws and elevates the team around him, specifically the GOAT rookie Trey Willie. The Hawks may not be the most talented team but they are definitely the most gelled. In my opinion, football is the ultimate team sport and with the way the Hawks play they may be the ultimate personification of football. They are middling in passing and middling in rushing but with a strong defense and no glaring weaknesses. It's just unfortunate this team will meet the Arizona Buzzsaws in the championship again.
4. Philadelphia Liberty (4-4-1)
This team is much better than their record states, as they are being held back by a struggling rookie QB, but they ask too much of him with 344 attempts, second in the league. With that volume the interceptions are expected and he really hasn't hurt them too much as they are 3rd in the league in scoring and 1st in their conference. Impressive numbers to be sure. Their running is definitely subpar too but with 9 touchdowns on the season, they can punch it in when it counts. For such a young team you can see the struggles on defense, especially the pass game. They are third to last in points and second to last in yards, and last in PDs, however they are 3rd in interceptions, so perhaps it's more about not getting to the ball than ball skills themselves. Either way if they want to be a force in the playoffs they need to limit the mistakes and shore up that leaky pass D.
5. San Jose SaberCats (4-4-1)
Ethan Hunt is still a great QB and he is propelling this offense forward. He is still below average in attempts but throws a good amount of touchdowns and not a lot of picks, his completion percentage has definitely fallen off from last year though. It's a good thing that he's playing so well as their run game has been very disappointing, 3rd in attempts but last in YPC, second to last in longest rush and only tied for 4th in touchdowns. Their defense is good in the sense that they cause turnovers with the best of them, but their points against is just average. This is probably due to a weaker offense leaving them with bad field position; the D can only do so much. If they want to make it to the playoffs they'll need some luck and a much improved ground game.
6. Yellowknife Wraiths (4-5)
If people are being truly honest with themselves the Wraiths do not deserve to be any higher or lower than 6th. This is a decidedly disappointing turn of events from many people's championship predictions. What's the culprit? It's not Orosz who is tied for second fewest interceptions and second most touchdowns, even if his completion percentage is much lower than last year. It's not Bubba Nuck and the rushing game, Wraiths were average there last year and are average this year. Is it defense? No way, they're much improved over last year where they were decidedly bottom two. This year the D is second in sacks and middling in pass deflection and interceptions, with two safeties. So what is it? Maybe the offensive line who were the best squad last season and now are decidedly average. I really don't think it's any of these, I think it's the fact that the whole team cannot come together and play a complete game. Nine games into the season and has anyone seen them play to their talent level? I sure haven't. If the Wraiths are going to take a step forward next season they need to grab a little mojo from the Hawks and play a complete game, there's too much talent here to squander.
7. Colorado Yeti (2-7)
The Yeti are not the worst team in the league. Say it with me, one more time. The Yeti are not the worst team in the league. They have 2 wins for crying out loud, one was at home against Legion who they haven't played on the road yet, but the other was at home against the Wraiths who are much more talented a squad. This team still has some killers on it's squad, Brige Boggs, Jonathan Saint, Torque Lewith (@Muford he plays where I say he plays), Fuego Wozy, Boss Tweed. They may have had a fire sale but their team is still loaded and ready to win with upstart rookie Nicholas Pierno leading the way. Watch out
8. Las Vegas Legion (0-9)
The team hasn't won yet but they still have some bright spots. Ardie Savea is still Ardie Savea, and LeClair is dominating now that he is out of Stormblessed's shadow, 865 yards and 6 touchdowns is a really nice surprise. Young rook Connor Tanner has also been showing out. He may not have the yards or TDs but is proving himself to be a field stretcher at TE, with the highest avg yards per catch in the league, 10.5. Their defense is bad and their offense is weak but this is a rebuilding team with a growing core that could be competitive soon enough. Don't sleep on the Legion next year, they could be primed for some upsets.
Please send my buddy @Bzerkap the first 1mil from this. I’ll take the rest.
GRADED
For the record, the rigged index has the Outlaws as #1.
1. Arizona Outlaws (9-0)
They aren't going to lose to anyone for the rest of the season. If you're smart you're just gonna relax, grab the lube, and let it happen; you can contact the local authorities afterward. Did you know that @ErMurazor doesn't actually rig the sims? It's @4D Chess who actually waits til Er goes to sleep and then comes in the house from his garage and fixes the results. Also, did you know that @4D Chess lives in Er's garage? It shows true team bonding if you ask me.
2. Orange County Otters (6-3)
The god damn Otters, if the Outlaws weren't around I'd assume the Otters were the ones rigging this thing. Nah jk, Boss is a legit superstar and they have a cadre of wideouts that makes the rest of the league jealous, and he stole my Burny baby from me, that cannot be forgiven. Anyway, their defense hasn't been as strong this season but they drafted well and are poised to be a strong team for several season to come as long as they can afford Boss.
3. Baltimore Hawks (6-3)
Kyubee may be scrub in name but he is definitely anything but in play. He's a solid starter without any real flaws and elevates the team around him, specifically the GOAT rookie Trey Willie. The Hawks may not be the most talented team but they are definitely the most gelled. In my opinion, football is the ultimate team sport and with the way the Hawks play they may be the ultimate personification of football. They are middling in passing and middling in rushing but with a strong defense and no glaring weaknesses. It's just unfortunate this team will meet the Arizona Buzzsaws in the championship again.
4. Philadelphia Liberty (4-4-1)
This team is much better than their record states, as they are being held back by a struggling rookie QB, but they ask too much of him with 344 attempts, second in the league. With that volume the interceptions are expected and he really hasn't hurt them too much as they are 3rd in the league in scoring and 1st in their conference. Impressive numbers to be sure. Their running is definitely subpar too but with 9 touchdowns on the season, they can punch it in when it counts. For such a young team you can see the struggles on defense, especially the pass game. They are third to last in points and second to last in yards, and last in PDs, however they are 3rd in interceptions, so perhaps it's more about not getting to the ball than ball skills themselves. Either way if they want to be a force in the playoffs they need to limit the mistakes and shore up that leaky pass D.
5. San Jose SaberCats (4-4-1)
Ethan Hunt is still a great QB and he is propelling this offense forward. He is still below average in attempts but throws a good amount of touchdowns and not a lot of picks, his completion percentage has definitely fallen off from last year though. It's a good thing that he's playing so well as their run game has been very disappointing, 3rd in attempts but last in YPC, second to last in longest rush and only tied for 4th in touchdowns. Their defense is good in the sense that they cause turnovers with the best of them, but their points against is just average. This is probably due to a weaker offense leaving them with bad field position; the D can only do so much. If they want to make it to the playoffs they'll need some luck and a much improved ground game.
6. Yellowknife Wraiths (4-5)
If people are being truly honest with themselves the Wraiths do not deserve to be any higher or lower than 6th. This is a decidedly disappointing turn of events from many people's championship predictions. What's the culprit? It's not Orosz who is tied for second fewest interceptions and second most touchdowns, even if his completion percentage is much lower than last year. It's not Bubba Nuck and the rushing game, Wraiths were average there last year and are average this year. Is it defense? No way, they're much improved over last year where they were decidedly bottom two. This year the D is second in sacks and middling in pass deflection and interceptions, with two safeties. So what is it? Maybe the offensive line who were the best squad last season and now are decidedly average. I really don't think it's any of these, I think it's the fact that the whole team cannot come together and play a complete game. Nine games into the season and has anyone seen them play to their talent level? I sure haven't. If the Wraiths are going to take a step forward next season they need to grab a little mojo from the Hawks and play a complete game, there's too much talent here to squander.
7. Colorado Yeti (2-7)
The Yeti are not the worst team in the league. Say it with me, one more time. The Yeti are not the worst team in the league. They have 2 wins for crying out loud, one was at home against Legion who they haven't played on the road yet, but the other was at home against the Wraiths who are much more talented a squad. This team still has some killers on it's squad, Brige Boggs, Jonathan Saint, Torque Lewith (@Muford he plays where I say he plays), Fuego Wozy, Boss Tweed. They may have had a fire sale but their team is still loaded and ready to win with upstart rookie Nicholas Pierno leading the way. Watch out
8. Las Vegas Legion (0-9)
The team hasn't won yet but they still have some bright spots. Ardie Savea is still Ardie Savea, and LeClair is dominating now that he is out of Stormblessed's shadow, 865 yards and 6 touchdowns is a really nice surprise. Young rook Connor Tanner has also been showing out. He may not have the yards or TDs but is proving himself to be a field stretcher at TE, with the highest avg yards per catch in the league, 10.5. Their defense is bad and their offense is weak but this is a rebuilding team with a growing core that could be competitive soon enough. Don't sleep on the Legion next year, they could be primed for some upsets.
Code:
1070 words
GRADED