A small contingent of press has gathered around the statue to Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette, in Havre de Grace, Maryland. This site was chosen by the agent of Francois Lamoreux, likely due to its exceedingly long name in order to squeeze more money out of the league for printing costs. The offensive lineman, coming off his first few games as a waiver pickup of the Las Vegas Legion, will stand for the Season 3 draft on Wednesday.
"Le ho ho ho, Francois has finished his time in season 2. He has had many adventures in the league and looks forward to many more. Francois will accept questions from the dirty masses about his greatness."
A pudgy man in a tight-fitting cardigan stood with a tape recorder held out in his chubby hand.
"Mr. Lamoreux, recently your agent caused significant controversy by disrupting a Baltimore Hawks recruitment event and then lashing out against their general manager for being escorted out of the building."
"Le ho ho. Francois has had good Arli$$ agent. He ensures Francois is not drafted by cheating chickenhawks. I still would have liked to personally have seen scummy agent thrown out of event and thought the punishment for chief chickenhawk was too severe. Maybe if more managers kick around agent, Francois gets to keep more of his money instead of subsidizing agent's plastic surgery."
The reporter stands again, with significant difficulty, donut crumbs falling off his stomach as he rises. He asks another question between wheezes.
"Even more recently, your agent was implicated in a scam which solicited donations to your bank account. How do you respond to this incident?"
"Francois has no knowledge of such a scam. The letter came from Yellowknife and was posted by a member of the spookyghosts. Francois is no Inspector Javert but if he had to make a wager bet he would say the letter was an inside job."
The pudgy reporter takes a hit from an inhaler and stands again.
"What are your prospects of the upcoming draft?"
"Francois has been contacted by 4 teams who wish to draft me. Francois has not made many noises to raise his draft stock, some would say he has done the opposite in order to become a sleeper hit. Still, Francois will like to make draft interesting for everyone. Francois has knowledge of a video of his agent being contestant on cheesy American game show. If Francois is drafted in the first round, this tape will be released to the public."
GRADED
"Le ho ho ho, Francois has finished his time in season 2. He has had many adventures in the league and looks forward to many more. Francois will accept questions from the dirty masses about his greatness."
A pudgy man in a tight-fitting cardigan stood with a tape recorder held out in his chubby hand.
"Mr. Lamoreux, recently your agent caused significant controversy by disrupting a Baltimore Hawks recruitment event and then lashing out against their general manager for being escorted out of the building."
"Le ho ho. Francois has had good Arli$$ agent. He ensures Francois is not drafted by cheating chickenhawks. I still would have liked to personally have seen scummy agent thrown out of event and thought the punishment for chief chickenhawk was too severe. Maybe if more managers kick around agent, Francois gets to keep more of his money instead of subsidizing agent's plastic surgery."
The reporter stands again, with significant difficulty, donut crumbs falling off his stomach as he rises. He asks another question between wheezes.
"Even more recently, your agent was implicated in a scam which solicited donations to your bank account. How do you respond to this incident?"
"Francois has no knowledge of such a scam. The letter came from Yellowknife and was posted by a member of the spookyghosts. Francois is no Inspector Javert but if he had to make a wager bet he would say the letter was an inside job."
The pudgy reporter takes a hit from an inhaler and stands again.
"What are your prospects of the upcoming draft?"
"Francois has been contacted by 4 teams who wish to draft me. Francois has not made many noises to raise his draft stock, some would say he has done the opposite in order to become a sleeper hit. Still, Francois will like to make draft interesting for everyone. Francois has knowledge of a video of his agent being contestant on cheesy American game show. If Francois is drafted in the first round, this tape will be released to the public."
GRADED