(S38) PT 1 - Rocky Road

[Eldorian]

Goat Tannk is just naturally athletic and doesn't really need to do any kind of offseason ritual to stay in shape like most other athletes have to do so he just goes home and plays Call of Duty and drinks copious amounts of beer. Afterwards drunk off his ass he decides to wrestle some goats and works his way up to wrestling tanks. Of course this is what really keeps him in tip top shape but the beer helps him with the strength to get there. After he is done with that he gets doped up on mountain dew and laffy taffys because the jokes on the laffy taffys make him laugh and you know what they say, a happy Goat Tank is going to be a good Goat Tank. This is why he always has laffy taffys after and before each game. This all of course has nothing to do with why he missed the first game of the season. Nope.

Code:

162 words

[Big Newff]

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[JBLAZE_THE_BOSS]

When the offseason comes for others, the work just transfers over to a different compartment for generational superstar Johnny Blaze Jr. He’s taking part of his uncle’s MB12 conditioning program and it’s produced some stellar results.

“For other people on the outside, this might look crazy. To me, it’s just what Uncle Mike did and it’s been a normal part of my life since I was a kid. We’d spend springs/summers in remote log cabins in the deepest parts of New England. I got swole by lifting logs and doing work around the property while my dad and uncle used it to work out. They’d be hiking, rafting, staying physically fit. The most important thing is the diet, during these months we couldn’t have any type of tomatoes because they really inflame the muscles” according to Blaze Jr.

Perhaps the most bizarre part of Blaze’s off-season methods? That’s easy, says the young star.

“Sleeping outside in the summer with no clothes to refresh the outer and inner parts of your essence, it sort of re-sets the energy and brings you closer to the land. I try to limit these nights, mosquitoes can really pose problems in a lot of different spaces on your body.”

[yosh]

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[DarknessRising]

Making the jump from DSFL to ISFL, particularly at Quarterback with only 1 season down in the developmental league is going to be an eternal struggle. One way to make sure I have the best chance of survival in the league is ensure the greatest level of physical fitness I can achieve to combine with my big brain intelligence. A constant regime of workouts, strength training, scrabbling practice combined with teachings of more nuanced defensive reads will be critical as a rookie quarterback to find any success. Once more, whilst being on a rebuilding team, it is very likely that sacks in large volume will be coming my way, so I need to ensure lots of training to be able to take these mammoth hits from some of the strongest players in the world. This season wont be built on achieving success, rather ensuring a strong foundation to build my game in future seasons, and that starts with the strict training program for peak fitness levels.

[TheRocheLimit]

Dax Dangerfield spent the whole offseason with one goal in mind: breaking up passes. After posting a career low in pass deflections (as well as recording zero interceptions) this past season, Dax needed to get back to the basics. Every part of Dax's offseason routine revolved around getting to the football. From one on one drills against New York's elite wide receivers to hours upon hours of time with the jugs machine, Dax tried to refine his on ball skills. "It felt like high school football practice all over again", Dax mentioned in an offseason interview. The Silverbacks made a lot of big moves this offseason with the expectation of competing for a title, and Dax wanted to make damn sure that he upheld his end. "Look, we've got championship aspirations. As one of the leaders of this defense, I need to bring it every game, every quarter, and every play. We're looking to make a statement this season, and that starts with veterans like me. I will be better. No question."

[xenosthelegend]

To remain in top condition during the offseason, American Boot has the strictest training regiment out of anyone in the entire league. Even a single second of complacency will result in complete failure. American Boot's diet consists of only the finest lead poisoned water, and whatever food he can find in the forest. He spends his time rocket jumping around the entire planet as fast as he possibly can. His current record is 24 minutes, but he knows he can get faster than that. When invited to any of the offseason team activities, American Boot denied them, as going to these activities would have broken his conditioning. His offseason conditioning not only strengthens his body and improves his speed, but it also fortifies his mind. The lead from the water he drinks gets it into his bloodstream, and once the lead is in his bloodstream, mind readers are unable to read his mind during games because the lead blocks them.

[Sebster]

Willier does not do many offseason activities to stay in shape, as he does not really care! He was always a gifted athlete and could make do with whatever he had at the time. When he works out, he goes at his own pace and does not like sweating either. Typically it's just a couple of curls, maybe a bench press, some times hitting the leg press machine. One thing that Willier really despises is cardio! He hates running, walking, biking, anything like that, but not because it is hard he just finds it incredibly boring. I mean, you stay in the same place for what? 30 minutes? An hour? How does anyone find that fun? He would rather be at his favorite restaurant, Skyline, guzzling down some cheese coneys (with the habanero extreme cheese of course) than in a gym. Then once sundays show up he is ready to hit the field with a quenched appetite and a hunger for touchdowns!

wc: 162

[mer]

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[JKortesi81]

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