Goat Tannk is just naturally athletic and doesn't really need to do any kind of offseason ritual to stay in shape like most other athletes have to do so he just goes home and plays Call of Duty and drinks copious amounts of beer. Afterwards drunk off his ass he decides to wrestle some goats and works his way up to wrestling tanks. Of course this is what really keeps him in tip top shape but the beer helps him with the strength to get there. After he is done with that he gets doped up on mountain dew and laffy taffys because the jokes on the laffy taffys make him laugh and you know what they say, a happy Goat Tank is going to be a good Goat Tank. This is why he always has laffy taffys after and before each game. This all of course has nothing to do with why he missed the first game of the season. Nope.
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162 words