The Riddler
New York Sliverbacks
Dallas Birddongs
Former Players
Dominos Pizzaman S30-S40
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Growing up in a football family, it was very difficult for Not Edd to have a passion for anything else. AS a result, he really did not enjoy the sport of football much at all. The passion was not there and his dad and brother (Bigg and Big Edd) forcefully made him train with them during early morning workouts. It was dreadful and made him despise football even more. This continued through middle school where Not Edd would produce very abysmal and sad outings on the field. This was until one night on a nightly walk home from practice, Not edd crossed paths with USC's goated coach Lincoln Riley. Lincoln Riley taught Edd that it was important for him to find something in the sport that he could hone in and develop on in his own way. By doing so, he could find something about the sport that he enjoyed, and so Not Edd did. He realized he had a passion for Chess a few years back and looking at the X's and O's on the playbook it reminded him of a somewhat different version of chess. And the rest is history. Not EDd became the great quarterback he is known for today.
07-12-2023, 08:22 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-12-2023, 08:25 PM by HalfEatenOnionBagel. Edited 1 time in total.)
Waffle's upbringing was anything but ordinary. "Born" as an already fully formed 6 foot tall waffle with the mind of an infant certainly contributed to that. Much like Frankenstein's monster, he found himself feeling very much alone in a world that struggled to accept him. But as he got older and his creator raised him as her own child, people came around on Waffle because of his friendly demeanor despite their initial shock at meeting a talking Waffle. Things certainly were going as well as they could until Waffle discovered the game of football. The power, the grace, the touchdown celebrations. Waffle was immediately in awe of the sport. But when he went to try out for his school team he didn't find the warm welcome he had hoped for. "Boy, I said boy, how in the heck are you supposed to catch a football with no arms", coach Leghorn yelled at him as he stumbled onto the field at tryouts. The other kids laughed at him too calling him names like "stickybutt", "Jamarcus Waffle" and "Wannabe Pancake". Waffle left, dejected, his hopes and dreams dashed just as soon as they had begun. "Why the long face kid?" a gruff voice said from a dark alleyway. Waffle wasn't quite sure if the voice was serious or just making fun of the fact that his body was also his face. A figure emerged from the shadows, it was none other than San Jose Sabercats star Orpheus Czargyros. Waffle was shocked and told Orpheus of his sad tale. "Listen, kid", he said as he snuffed out a candy cigarette, "people used to make fun of me too y'know. Always messing up my name. Now look at me, they still make fun of me, but I make a bunch of money and play professional football. Your life is what you make it, my fine fluffy friend. So what are you gonna make of yours?" Orpheus descended back into the shadows, knocking over half a dozen trash cans on his way, "DAMMIT WHO PUT THESE HERE". From that day on, Waffle trained as hard as he could to become a football player. His height, size, and oh yeah that stickiness, actually made him a decent fit for tight end. When he got back on the field he was knocking heads left and right and making spectacular catches. Coach Leghorn was delighted, "Boy, I said boy, this might just work!!"
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[OPTION]Regular Season Stats
[OPTION](S2) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S3) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S4) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S5) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S6) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S7) 14 Games Played
[OPTION](S8) 14 Games Played
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[OPTION]Playoff Stats
[OPTION] 27839
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[OPTION]Trophy Case/Achievements:
[OPTION]Most Likely to Break the Team Bench When Sitting Down
[OPTION]Pumpkin Chuckin' Rally 2017 Semifinalist
[OPTION]Most Likely to Get Traded in S8 (T-1st)
[OPTION]Ultimus Champion S7, S8
As we all know, Oskar Clark’s college career started off on the wrong foot. The “organized crime” type of wrong foot. Yep, they got him on RICO charges. He got careless, flew too close to the sun, and got pinched. This is quite the fork in the road for the young Oskar Clark. Down one path is a career as a promising young football running back; down the other path, decades in a federal penitentiary. What could be possible do in a situation like this? Fortunately, Oskar is a quick thinker on and off the field. He’ll flip! He’ll wear a wire, spill his guts in court, testify against all his peers, the whole nine yards. Talk about punching it in. With the help of his agent/legal counsel, Oskar signed a deal that was sure to save his career. And that it did. Oskar’s legal troubles are in the rearview mirror. And in the frontview mirror? Glory.
Gaius Gleel wanted to be an actor. He had planned for it in the way that so many young people plan every aspect of their lives. The mental checklist goes: House, check; Girl, check; apple-cheeked children, check; career, and so forth.
Gaius Gleel was sure he'd make it out to Hollywood, but then stepped onto the Ultimate Frisbee field. There is a spark of competition that sometimes ignites the soul of the person with their tinderbox heart, and Gaius burst into flames after his first catch. The sound of footsteps chasing him; all the eyes watching as he pulled away and out towards the endzone. If he'd ever tried drugs, he knew this to be the same. Addicting, intoxicating, and always never enough. Soon the applause from the crowd at the end of his monologue series was dulled. It wasn't as real. It didn't feel earned. Not like when he stepped in front of his opponent and picked off the frisbee. That was real. In the end, no one plays Ultimate Frisbee forever, and football pays the bills. Had he not joined a simple pick up game of Frisbee, he knew he'd be in Hollywood. That's what he liked to think.
The biggest turning point in Ace's career was his decision to switch running back from the offensive line after being drafted by the Dallas Birddogs. Originally, he was worried that the switch would see his career progression slowed down, taking a few seasons to make his way to the ISFL. However, Ace's determination and grit, saw him take up the mantle of RB1 quickly upon the start of the season. After a rookie season, Ace was drafted by the Sarasota Sailfish, a team in need of running back in the near future. After one additional season of solid development in the DSFL, Ace is hoping to make the step up to the big leagues and be an integral part of the Sailfish offense for many seasons to come. What turned out as a bit of uncertain switch to fill a need in his team, ended up working out to his advantage because now he gets to be a big part of an exciting offense that will hope to challenge for the title in the near future!
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