One of my favorite things to do is prank the new rookies every season. In Honolulu, we decided to dig up an old favorite of mine that I used to do in Austin. So, we tell the new guys that somewhere in the locker room we’ve hidden a brass ring. It could be anywhere. The first rookie who finds it is given $500,000 cash, they get the closest parking spot to the door (a VERY big deal), and they fly first class to all of our away games this season. We even made up fake plaques so everything looks legit. We make them show up early in the morning and send them into the room to tear it apart to find this ring. The ring of course, does not exist. So these rookies bust their asses tearing up our locker room and making a huge mess. Its about that time that the coaching staff walks in as we prepare for practice. They see the mess, and they scold the rookies for disgracing our locker room. They make them clean up every inch of the room and put everything back, then they have to run laps as a punishment. It’s hilarious. (201)
Being one of the oldest players on the team, Albert Ruschmann has seen many rookie classes join the Yeti. He always likes to welcome them and make sure they feel like they are really part of the team. How he does this, however, varies by rookie. This season, the Yeti drafted cornerback Graham Harper in the first round. Being the most veteran defensive back on the roster and also a cornerback, Ruschmann felt it appropriate to take Harper in under his wing. Ruschmann was more than happy to impart some defensive knowledge and wisdom to Harper, but the true bonding experience came when Ruschmann pranked him.
Every morning before practice, Harper would have a nice cup of black coffee, nothing added. Ruschmann saw a golden opportunity to replace Harper's coffee with a cup of dirt. While the prank wouldn't last very long before Harper realized what had happened, the payoff would be worth it. Sure enough, the next morning Harper takes one "sip" and gets the dirt all over his face. Ruschmann howled with laughter and then was promptly assigned laps in practice.
Rookie hazing is nothing new to the world of pro football, but for Reece Wells II, it's something that he never looked forward to. Wells had always thought hazing was counterintuitive, and may even harm the unity of a team. He brought his concerns up to the team captains and coaches on Yellowknife. They said they'd hear him out, and invited him to a player meeting room to have a chat. The next day, as Wells approached the room, he noticed the door was ajar. That was odd. Meeting door were always closed all the time. Either way, he entered the room and- SPLOOSH... The bucket of ice water that had been propped on the top of the doorframe fell down and soaked Wells. Coaches and captains were heard roaring with laughter before Wells even saw them. Despite what he wanted, hazing was here to stay. In this world, it was conform or be conformed. Wells had been conformed.
Hazing has now become an acceptable part of the Bondi Beach Locker Room. Last year Kevin was on the wrong side of the rookie prank. Former GM rapids and Current GM Glims got the rookies so good that they started a fire Glims chant after it was revealed he was the mastermind.
This year as the GM I decided I needed to continue that trend and get the fire Artix chant going. Even though the chant had been going for a while because of a prank pulled on pre TDL waiver gadget, Kevin knew he had to take it up a notch.
So the veterans all got together and invited all the rookies to a nice steak restaurant for a team bonding event after a hard practice. What was supposed to be all you can eat - you pay though type of event quickly turned into hazing.
One by one all the vets left to go to the restroom however they slipped through the back door. After 20 minutes and no veterans the rookies started getting worried and texted in the group chat only to be sent by a picture of the entire group at a teammates house by Kevin stating have fun paying the bill rookies.
The poor rookies ended up splitting a 10k bill which seems to be a hefty chunk of their salary. Successful Kevin was happy as the next day the fire Artix chants picked up in full force.