If I could pick any location to be the host for this year’s Ultimus and Ultimini, there is no question as to the right place: the world of Foon. Being that this is an international simulation football league, I feel quite underrepresented in this league, since my home is not a nation on Earth. Therefore, not only should we rename the ISFL to be the Intergalactic Simulation Football League, but should have the Ultimus and Ultimini in Foon in order to appease me. Furthermore, Foon is a wonderful world full of magic and delights. I have a den that could easily fit all of the players and managers within the league. We would construct a stadium to end all stadiums, fit with a stage for the halftime performance and the nicest turf known to man. When it comes to the halftime show, there is a simple solution: have the infamous musical theatre group, The Cock Ticklers, perform one of their renditions of the finest piece of art to grace the galaxies, a mash up of Taylor Swift songs used to pumped up the crowd for the second half of the games. I have consulted with the various leaders of Foon and they are more than able and excited to have all you humans come to our world and showcase the greatest game played in this world. If you have any more questions, shoot me a DM and we can figure out the logistics for getting Foon to be the host this year.
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