(S35) PT 5 - Locker Room Incident

[ValorX77]

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[TwoSocks]

Oh boy do I have a story to tell. It all started on a Monday, as most of these do. I’m minding my business, listening to some Grateful Dead. I hear a commotion between our GM and Bonzi Buddy! Buddy was claiming that in another life he was a GM, and that he could do a better job than Painted! Naturally being the person he is, Painted couldn’t step down. What followed next is a battle comparable to a duck with laser eyes and a gorilla. Immediately our captains intervened, with Swift and Spiff both suggesting a game of Rock Paper Scissors! I came over and said I would ref, and it would be a best of 3. They agreed and it began. Round one was a win to Buddy with a Scissors beats Paper. Round two was a draw, with a double rock. Round three continued in that fashion, but with a double paper. Round four went to Painted though, with a paper beats rock. It was getting very interesting, coming down to the wire. As the two sides put out there fingers, a wild Mike Scott came over with his friend Kevin, and a giant bucket of chili. As the match was about to be decided, Kevin spilled his chili. Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and started to grieve. Buddy and Painted made up at the funeral for the chili, and Kevin was never to be seen again. Some of us wondered if Mike Scott worked his graphic magic on us in real life.

258 words

[g2019]

The scene was grim in the Norfolk locker room today as highly touted running back, Sconnie McSix, let his temper boil over, shoving GM Beck to the ground as he confronted him about a lack of goal line opportunities. Players and team staff immediately jumped to the defense of the GM, holding McSix back and trying to calm him down. A few, notably co-GM ImSatanJunior and Tight End Eeeeeeee phenssta, challenged McSix directly, and reportedly shouted things like "Groves is just better, man. Get over it!" and "there's only one true back here, and it ain't you!"

McSix's agent released the following statement to ESPN:

"Sconnie regrets his poor decision to take physical action against Mr. Beck, as he is someone he respects a great deal. However, at this point, the numbers don't lie. Will Groves has gotten over 100 carries and has twice as many touchdowns as Sconnie. He's taking food out of his mouth. This is something Sconnie has addressed with management earlier in the season, and at this point, it seems like management doesn't really care about what Sconnie thinks or wants. We are extremely disappointed with how his workload has been handled, and we've made no secret of that."

No Seawolves team personnel could be reached for comment at this time, but it's clear that things are getting testy in Norfolk.

[JoshiePoo]

The Kansas City locker room had completely shattered. Firstfray was beside himself. Driving around downtown Kansas City begging (thru texts) So_evil’s family for address to So_evil’s home. Fred Edison had a post game press conference in which he stated, “I don’t compare myself to anybody,” before rolling up his sleeve to reveal his Jean-Ralphio Saperstein tattoo. “I’ll let you interpret that however you want,” he said. Austin Morley was seen in the corner of the locker room, rocking back and forth to himself mumbling 80, 80, 80, 80… over and over again. Mandrews McHollywood was going to anyone he could find, recounting the tale of the Hawks run to the S33 Ultimus, in vivid and exacting detail. To which Painted replied, “I ain’t listening to all that, glad that happened for you though, or sorry.” He was promptly escorted back to his own locker room. The Coyotes emergency Locker Room meeting was “intense” and “at one point Kurbis was crying” but everyone grew closer and a big lesson was learned.

fin

[Jangorhino]

theres been a few dustups in the locker room ive seen and been a part of over the years. things get heated and some users, including myself, are what some people call passionate. the strength of the locker room dictates how things are handled in these instances. for example, while in berlin with my first player the great Mario VonPebbles, I got into it pretty good with the great user AC. looking back it was over some dumb shit and i really blew my stack for no good reason and thats generally been the case in my experience. The berlin locker room was strong at that time. we had a lot of veteran leadership among the users on that team and we also had a great war room and GM. eventually cooler heads prevailed thanks to the great strength of that locker room and the beef was squashed. after the fact, AC and i became great buddies through the experience. much closer than before the beef and much closer than had we not gone at it. 

172 words

[PurpleReign]

As a captain in Norfolk, I end up having to handle some of the fights that occur, and because defense is a weak link system, sometimes people get pissed. One time was after our loss to Minnesota, it didn’t matter that the loss probably wouldn’t impact us much at all, all that mattered was the emotions on people laid out on the field. In this moment however, I was not the one who had to step in to stop a fight, I was the one who started it. I had one of my best games of the season and really felt like I stepped up. So I started chewing out the whole defense, really going for the jugular with some of my verbal swings. Tae Dawson stepped up to me and told me I needed to calm down, since I just being a dick, I didn’t take that too well, and shoved him to the ground. Luckily, our LB’s stepped in and held us back, and pretty soon after I realized I was in the wrong. It was tough with my pride, but I had to apologize to the whole defense, especially Dawson after that. 

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[Alikh]

A fight broke out in the Royals locker room a few weeks ago after practice.  But oddly enough, it wasn’t between to players, but between two GMs.  Apparently as the team was running drills @Sebster was too busy enjoying his 3rd Cane’s meal of the day and was neither paying attention to the team nor the discussion points of co GM @Gordon Bombay.  In an act of frustration, Gordo knocked the last tender and piece of toast off the wall Seb was leaning on, letting the food fall to the floor.  Milescu was on the field at the time so it was hard to see exactly what happened, but needless to say there was Canes sauce everywhere and two out of shape out of breath GMs laying on their backs panting by the time the team ran over to them.  Stepping carefully to avoid getting sauce on his custom cleats for the charity game coming up, Milescu pulled each man to their feet.  After a long sit down in the team offices, it was decided that Gordo would replace the wasted food with not one but two cups of Canes sauce, but in return Seb wouldn’t let himself get distracted by the chicken until Gordo had finished talking about the business of the day.

213 words

[Pizza-faith]

After multiple incidents in the Grey Duck's locker room the upper management has decided to implement a 24/7 fight club. Be ready, stay ready.

[Southie]

As the son of a Olympic Boxer and professional boxing training, Dobromil Dvorak is  used to his fair share of dustups. As such his job whenever a fight starts  is that of a referee. Few people in the ISFL are as qualified to judge a fist fight as the Minnesota Grey Ducks runningback.
He’s noted for reffing such fights as Bonzi Buddy Vs Caleb Lee over rental cars fee, the four round instant classic between Aqeel Steele and Johnny Rex Nelson and Jimmy Holding vs Brock Landers. His personal favorite knock is the Aqeel Steele left head kick and right uppercut that he landed on Johnny Nelson.  In fact,  Dobromil loves these scrums so much that he’s started his own YouTube channel where he uploads footage of any locker room dustups that he’s think are of particular interest to fans of the DSFL. He has two thousand and four hundred subscribers and over fifteen thousand Instagram followers where he uploads click of particularly brutal knockouts.

165 Words

[khkreator]

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