06-11-2023, 04:04 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2023, 04:05 PM by TDenstroyer. Edited 1 time in total.)
If your player had a show starring them, what would the plot be?
If Tunkha Danstrol had a show staring them it would be a one of those Diner, Drive-ins, and Dive type of shows. One where he just goes around to grease traps all across the country, or maybe even the world, eating above average cheeseburgers with grease drippings landing on the completely average fries while exclaiming how incredible every bite it. People would watch this show just because he has such a bubbly personality and really knows how to dig into a burger. The name of the show could be Dine, Digest, and Die because the food he'd be eating basically leads to those three things. Tunkha is an incredible lineman, but he has the personality to fit on television, however he is kind of stupid and therefore would only ever succeed in a show that has a simple premise and had something he could get excited for... In this case it is foods full of saturated fats. 157 Words You’re in charge of entertainment for the Ultimus or Ultimini half-time show. What would you do? If I was in charge of the halftime show for the Ultimus or Ultimini I would have the world's greatest open mic night. There would be a sign up sheet and no vetting whatsoever. So who ever got a wild hair up their tush and wanted to get on stage could. You know how to play a banjo and spit into a bucket 20 yards away, get on up there! You have a horrible stand-up comedy set with no age appropriate jokes? Go ahead, let's see how quickly we have to cut the mics. Do you enjoy people watching you as you eat? Bring your extra large pizzas on stage and eat them as the whole world watch. With an open mic night the entertainment is decided by fate, just as the sim decides our fates. Have people sign up for 3 minute slots and give everyone their chance at fame. No one creates spectacular like you do. 158 Words Football is a game that has been going on for a while, loved by fans all over. But what if you were able to make some rule changes? Talk us through your new version of football, and what would be different and why? If I could change one rule about football today I would make it so that defensive backs are allowed to press up to 10 yards instead of 5. I find that all the rule changes in the past 15 years seem to be ear marked "for safety" but the reality is it continues to lean the product on the field towards offense. There is nothing that makes a fan more agitated than seeing his favorite team lose because of a "ticky-tack" penalty that goes against the defense. I feel that a small mentality change in the referees begins with giving defensive backs more room to be aggressive around the line of scrimmage. We do not want to make the game less safe, but at the same time starting to lean the edge back towards the defense a little. It will make a more interesting product on the field. Football isn't about how many points are scored. It's a game of offense and defense. 163 Words Your player has decided to start a podcast since it's what all the cool celebrities are doing these days. What would the name of your player's podcast be and what would they talk about/do on the podcast? Tunkha decides to start a podcast and it really only makes sense that he does so with one name. The Tunkha Talks Variety Show! This show would be about Tunkha having various guests and just talking to them about whatever they wanted to chat about. Tunkha has a personality that seems to draw honesty and good chat out of people. He would start by having other teammates come on the show and talk about their other interests and hobbies, what they are hoping for from the season, and just random chat that keeps people entertained. As his show's popularity started to take off, he would move it to youtube and have a variety of guests appear on through out a singular show. It would run like the late night comedy shows except his would always be palatable to podcast viewers. That talent that arrived on the show would have to have something they can show off over a microphone, but also have to be good at discussing topics. Thankfully Tunkha brings out that side of people. 176 Words
06-11-2023, 04:37 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2023, 04:41 PM by Jimi64. Edited 1 time in total.)
9. The decision that comes to mind for me that changed the league was the Liberty drafting Negs. The story of the Cape Town Crash’s Ultimus is one that is dear to my heart, because it spans beyond just the purple rhinos of the Crash. It reaches back to a team that will once be considered a relic of the league but is now still fresh in the mind of many: the Philly Liberty. Pat and Cody brought that team from a dumpster fire into relevancy, and more many seasons we fought to make us serious title contenders. We were unsuccessful, and due to this I admit to even wondering if the sim had an arbitrary code that kept us stuck as a disappointment. This was of course just a coping mechanism, but many both seriously and jokingly referred to the franchise as cursed. I eventually had a period of inactivity due to life changes, and during that time Negs initiated the rebranding. If I had been around, I probably would have fought against it. I loved the Philly branding personally, though I could understand the desire for fresh change. Really though, as much as I can wax poetic about the old days, this needed to be Negs ship to captain, and he could put any flag up there as far as I could care. He always had a great vision and at times a reckless abandon when it came to running the team. His trades are brash, but with the chance of great rewards. I still remember us trusting Negs with just the important position of quarterback of our team back in the day. New create quarterbacks can be a risky proposition. His personality and dedication was sustained, and he truly became a good friend of mind in this league. At the time people questioned our decision somewhat. We drafted him early, and people said we could’ve waited, but I remember in the war room we discussed that if the guy you want is on the board, draft him. No need to get cute. Even if drafting his player didn’t change the course of that team, drafting Negs the person sure did, and I’m sure that the Crash will continue to see success with him at the helm.
23. One goofy change we could make to the sim would be customizations to how the dots look on the stream, almost like how you can customize a car in rocket league. In rocket league, there is an orange and blue team, and although you can customize the cars themselves and even the shades of orange or blue, they must remain symbolic of one side. Maybe the dots could leave a trail behind them. Can you imagine a 80 yard touchdown with a trail of rainbow behind it? Or with the dot sparkling? And then an explosion once they reach the endzone? I don’t think these should be common, or maybe even in the sim at all, but it would be fun to see once. Maybe it could be similar to the old NBA jam games, where if a quarterback completes 5 passes in a row, the dot looks like it’s on fire. These could be very expensive changes, perhaps as a way for the ultra rich to spend their money on something. It would definitely make their player stand out. 27. If for some reason I couldn’t have created kicker, I probably would have created tight end. My other choice would have been o-line, but I tried that last player and it didn’t really work out. That has less to do with the position and more to do with how my life was, but I still wanted a position with more impact. I wouldn’t have wanted to be a premier tight end, because I know there are many that nowadays want to be Travis Kelce type mostly WR tight ends, looking for huge receiving stats and asking for big targets. I wouldn’t do that, and I’d instead look to play a blocking tight end, one that helps keep the offense humming. My TPE wouldn’t get incredibly high, so my minimum contracts wouldn’t take up too much of the salary cap, but I would still be much more effective than a bot. I’d be a team player. Any catches I’d get would be bonuses. I’m not sure if there really is even a market for this type of player, but I might just create one for my next generation.
11) Player Origin Story
Bertie Mannering-Phipps is the son of Alexander Mannering-Phipps, noted assorted tinned seafood tycoon, and Lalage Mannering-Phipps, daughter of the famous biographer and socialite raconteur, Cecilia Prune. Born into excruciating wealth, Bertie was raised to play the truly elite sports - tennis, golf and croquet. After suffering an unfortunate ring finger injury at the under 16 World Cup of croquet back in 2019, Bertie was publicly castigated by his father, and confined to the family estate in the Hamptons for no less than 6 months as punishment for his terrible failure. This cast Bertie into a horrible rage, and in a savage act of revenge, he stole his mother’s antique silver set, bundled it into the Rolls Royce and bribed one of the junior butlers to drive him to Princeton, where he enrolled himself into a fully pre-paid business program with one of the spare Amex cards that he found in the glove compartment of the Rolls Royce. Bertie quickly caught the attention of both Princeton’s croquet and football coaches, and after a brief, yet furious courting period involving copious amounts of Pimms and Budweiser, the football program won out, and invited him into their ranks. His natural speed, intelligence, and desire to embarrass his father led him naturally to the position of RB, where he honed his skills to the severe detriment of his studies. Although his strength and hand-eye coordination have been pointed out as areas in sore need of improvement, his sheer speed more often than not makes up for these deficiencies. He holds himself accountable for his weaknesses however, and is determined to prove that he can become a powerful asset to any team that picks him. Recently, he was picked up by the Bondi Beach Buccaneers who are eager to see what this rookie can bring to the mix, once he makes it through a full training camp and shakes off the effects of a decade of toiling in the croquet world.
Task 1:
The Tijuana Luchadores were early favorites for the Ultimini Bowl in season 41. They led the league in TPE totals and had the benefit of a weaker division. The duo of Crane and Gurley in the backfield gave the offense plenty of options on offense alongside QB Bannings. Tijuana was eager to prove themselves and went undefeated in the preseason and the first 5 weeks of the regular season. In week 6 they were set to play Bondi Beach Buccaneers, who going into the match was 0-5 for the season. What should have been a layup for Tijuana turned into a disaster. A last minute miracle drive from BBB gave TIJ their first loss on the season. They would lose the following game to KCC and tie to DAL. Ultimately they would finish 8-5-1 in the regular season. Which given the state of the DSFL South was enough to clinch the division and advance to the playoffs where they would have to face BBB again. A nervous thought for TIJ with how the first game finished. In the North KCC was on a roll. Despite being on the lower side TPE wise, KCC had all the heart in the world. In both their meeting with TIJ during the regular season, KCC came out the victor. Their QB Jefferson was good through the air, but great with his legs. Defenses struggled to contain the KCC defense with the versatility they brought to the field. They finished 11-3 in the regular season, and easily won the North division to go to the playoffs against LON. In the playoffs the TIJ vs BBB game was fairly low scoring with TIJ slowly grinding out the win. They used the pair of running backs to their advantage as much as possible, giving BBB as little opportunity to score on defense as they could. They limited BBB to only 9 points total and ended the game 24-9. Despite some ups and some downs TIJ secured their spot in the Ultimini bowl and was making it count when it was needed. In the North, KCC was putting on an offense love display. Quarterback Jake Jefferson threw for 354 yards and 5 touchdowns and the combo of running backs along with Jefferson’s yards on the ground totaled 178. Altogether they put up 41 points on LON. Defense was hit or miss for KCC. In the first half they shutout LON before giving up 13 points in the second quarter and 15 points in the third. In the fourth quarter they got their breath back and shut them out to finish the game. KCC won 41-28 to win and advance to the Ultimini Bowl representing the North. The Ultimini was an absolute slog of a game itself. Neither team scored until TIJ opened it up with a touchdown pass about midway through the second quarter. With how defense heavy of a game it was it seemed that any amount of a deficit would be too much for either team to climb and KCC wasn’t off to a good start. The rest of the second would see no more points as well as the entirety of the third quarter. Then we get into the fourth and final quarter of the game. A game that had most everyone asleep in their chairs woke them up with a slap to the face. The first play of the fourth quarter was another touchdown pass for TIJ. The game was 14-0 and KCC hadn’t scored as much as a field goal at this point. It seemed impossible they would be able to come back. After an exchange of drive TIJ put up another 3 points with a field goal from kicker Wing Wang. It’s almost halfway through the fourth quarter and it’s a 3 score game. KCC wasn’t deterred and with a short run followed by a 36 yard pass to open their drive we’re on their way to score their first points of the game with a touchdown, putting the game at 17-7. TIJ goes three and out giving KCC the ball back with very little time left. KCC scores with 34 seconds left in the game down by three. They go for an onside kick and recover it. A 23 yard pass puts them in field goal range and the kick is good. The game goes to overtime. No one scored until the final minute of the game where Wing Wang kicks a field goal for TIJ, giving them the victory and the S41 Ultimini title.
06-11-2023, 05:34 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2023, 05:34 PM by UptownCord. Edited 1 time in total.)
4 x Tier 3
23. Overall, I quite like the sim-engine. I wish it was better than it was, but my addiction to the dots is as real as any. However, there are a few things that bother me to no end. The first is the sim not understanding how penalties work and giving teams a free play past the line of scrimmage when in reality it should be first down. This really shouldn't be too hard to fix but alas Wolverine Studios is run by bastards. Another thing that irks me is the complete disregard for clock management by the sim AI. As it is now, teams don't really start hurrying up when behind until there are fewer than three minutes in the half. A team that is down multiple scores should start taking more risks much earlier on, perhaps around the 10 minute mark of the fourth. I understand this is partially do to team aggressiveness, but at some point everyone should be hurrying up. And finally, while it is not something that ruins the sim for me, I wish that kickoffs and punt returns were more in depth and we could actually see the dots moving. (193 words) 26. If John Stark VIII were not in the ISFL he would definitely be a park ranger at one of the USA's many wonderful national parks. An avid fan of the outdoors, he tries to spend as much time in nature as he can when not doing everything possible to become the best football player he can be. If he had his way, he would be working at Acadia National Park in Maine, a place of true beauty that never fails to amaze. Between maintaining more than 130 miles of hiking trails and taking countless visitors on tours of Mount Desert Island he would get to spend his days surrounded by the beauty of nature. Additionally, the idyllic town of Bar Harbor, Maine is located on the same island as the majority of the park. On his days off Stark could head into town and eat as much blueberry ice cream as he can get his hands on. (157 words) 34. Choosing which rookie had the greatest impact for the Otters last season is a hard task. Tyler One led the team in rushing earning himself an Offensive Rookie of the Year candidacy while Mathias Mayhem, John Stark VIII, and Iosefa Fuamatu-Ma'afala all had great seasons and were nominees for Defensive Rookie of the Year. However, as none of them one said awards, I will go with Iosefa Fuamatu-Ma'afala as he was a First Team All-Pro Defensive End as a rookie! Anchoring Orange County's defensive line, Fuamatu-Ma'afala tallied forty-eight tackles, twelve sacks, seven TFL's, and two forced fumbles while starting all sixteen games for the otters. Placing fourth in the league for sacks by a defensive lineman, Fuamatu-Ma'afala accounted for 22.64 percent of sacks by the Otters on his own, leading the way for the rest of the defense. All in all, the Otters would not have made the playoffs without his huge performances. (153 words) SHL Affiliate PT (173 Words)
27. If Honey Humphries wasn't a safety, he would probably be a tight end. He played tight end in high school and easily could have kept going with it if his college coaches made different choices. It is not the greatest idea to be a typically ball handling position for Honey Humphires, however, as he would usually pop two or three balls a game in high school due to his sharp claws. He already tapes over them as a safety for the sake of his opponents and that might impact his ability to catch reliably. Maybe offensive or defensive line would be a natural place for a bear, but Honey Humphries never wanted to be your average bear. Somewhere in his bear brain, Honey does have aspirations to be a quarterback. Without opposable thumbs, though, it will never realistically happen. Safety is Honey's favorite position and he's ecstatic that he will be able to play it at the next level!
19. Some new additions that Honey Humphries would like to see in the new stadium are as follows: 1.) Honey Dispenser in the locker room. Honey has to bring in his own honey from home every week so he can recharge on game day. It would be nice if the team supplied the honey because Honey's always getting his Jeep sticky transporting it back and forth. 2.) At least two seats that are reserved for bears and will accommodate bears (specifically grizzly bears). Honey holds out hope that his real parents will somehow show up to a game and maybe the reason they haven't is because they wouldn't have seats. 3.) Dedicated section in the locker room for a bear groomer. It is not easy getting all the nooks and crannies clean as a 6'4" grizzly bear without opposable thumbs. After a hard-fought game, Honey thinks it would be nice to easily clean off in the facility rather than wait until he gets home. 25. 31.
Task 19
Oh man I'd love to actually be a part of helping to design a new stadium for us. So Since we're the Portland Pythons we'd definitely have to have a snake pit. Now of course it wouldn't be a snake pit with poisonous or aggressive snakes of course, it would be a fun snake pit that would also serve as a desensitizing area for snakes. You see the more mellow snakes are really fun and I've learned to like them a lot. So we'd have that of course and then I'd like to change up the menu a bit. I'd definitely like to have a food stand centered around game meats, like bison, rabbit, elk, bear, etc. I really enjoy eating those types of meats and I think others would to if they had the chance. Lastly I think having a massage place would be absolutely epic. Now I know you probably think that's a bit out of place, however, it'd serve multiple purposes and have a spot for moms to go when they don't really care about the game and need to relax. Task 20 Wow I'm super excited that I was asked this question because finally I get to talk about the best player on our team that nobody, and I mean nobody, ever talks about. This player is none other than King Jellyfish. Now some people just think of him as the worst player on our offensive line, but they just have no idea what they're talking about. This dude goes out there and busts his butt each and every day and never has a negative thing to say despite dudes touching his butt all day. He works hard and he's a positive force in our locker room that even when things aren't exactly going the way we'd like he still is trying to fire us up and keep a positive mindset. Just last season we went through a really rough transition year losing some really good players and things weren't really going our way but man Jellyfish really be out there dancing and singing in the locker room trying to make people laugh, he's really a great guy. Task 23 Wow so I don't think there's enough space to really talk about the sim engine and my thoughts on it. Basically it comes down to this: it's dogshit. Now that may be a bit harsh for just having some dots run around on the screen throwing balls and bouncing off of each other and I'm sure if I were to take a stab at making my own sim engine that it wouldn't even be half as good. In fact I've looked into what it'd take and it's actually a really daunting task. Now it's definitely a terrible sim engine and I'm not sure the guys at Wolverine Studio even know how football is played because the engine's strategies aren't good and it's decision making is even worse. Everyone know this to be true and the end game decision making is about as bad as it could be. It's like it's the opposite of what it should be and it makes no sense what the players are doing. Affiliate Task PBE PT |------------------------------------------|
| |
| SPACE FOR RENT |
| |
|------------------------------------------|
17. Going to Disney World! Who was the Ultimus or Ultimini Game MVP? Give us a rundown of their celebratory trip to Disney World. (Written Task)
I don’t think you can give it to an individual player this season on either team. The offenses could not finish for either side (with 9 punts shared between them and 4 field goals), even though there was efficient rushing on Arizona’s side and a good pass catching corps on Cape Town’s roster, with only 4 touchdowns total. It would have to be either the kicking or the defense for Cape Town in my opinion. Lets go with Cunningham for his efficient punting lock down day and his big foot hitting a 43 and 53 yard field goal to close out the game. At Disney World, he would probably stay in a mid range room and spend a lot of time at the Animal Kingdom, because it feels like home back in South Africa. I’d imagine he would be big into the monorail because it’s as mundane as most kickers. All in all, he probably wishes he was elsewhere since Disney caters to kids mostly, and he’s a well known bachelor. (171 Words) 23. What are your thoughts on the sim engine? What sort of improvements would you make to the sim engine if given the opportunity? (Written Task) We’ve been on draft day pro sports for a while, and while I know it is frustrating at times, there’s not many better options. I do wish Wolverine Studios would cater a bit more to custom integrations into their game, or at least build out some input APIs, but ultimately they do allow for decent team/field branding and player customization. It’s tough to balance for the sim team, especially with the code being both wonky and not entirely visible at times, but I think there should be a re-evaluation of lineup, tendencies, and play calling rules every 2-3 seasons (no idea if this currently occurs honestly, if it does, that’s great). If I could “magically” make improvements to the sim, and I say magically because I don’t think any of us has the desire to re-code the platform to this extent, I think I’d love to see it be more than dots and to have broadcasting enabled. Neither are feasible because they would require a complete new engine and either a ridiculously strong predictive AI/TTS combo, or a ton of extra work to do commentating from the sim team (plus it would slow down the sims significantly. (199 Words) 24. You’re in charge of entertainment for the Ultimus or Ultimini half-time show. What would you do? (Written Task) We’re gonna have t-shirt cannons. All over the world. There will be t-shirt cannons in the host cities. There will be t-shirt cannons in the non involved teams. There will be t-shirt cannons in the streets. They will be in the homes. I want t-shirt cannons shooting into babies cribs for halftime, hell yeah. But we don’t stop there. We’re gonna launch an ISFL branded home assistance system, with a touch screen. 357 days of the year this thing is just a standard Alexa type device, but on Ultimus week, it transforms into a 24/7 team fanfare and stat machine. I want this thing spitting off parlay odds, shoutout to FanDuel. I want it injecting the Ultimus lineups and stats into everyones homes. If they want to turn it off, too bad. We will topple governments using this, and the people will be forced to watch the Ultimini. Ad revenue will not matter anymore because we will be the government. The halftime show will become the everyday show. The singularity is upon us, this halftime. (176 Words) 29. What team do you think has the best branding in the league? Why? (Written Task) For ISFL I think it’s got to be the Yellowknife Wraiths. Shits spooky, with a good color motif that vibes well with both the cold north and the team imagery in wraiths/specters. I don’t think any sports team in real life really takes on the supernatural too heavily due to probable audience concerns, I think it is great to see it here. The glowing blue eyes have always been a sick touch, even prior to Game of Thrones white walkers (no idea if that was the original inspiration, but it’s good regardless). Also I’m biased and spent many wonderful seasons there. Shoutout to Zoot, Arkz, Fly, and Shady. For DSFL I’m going to go with my new team the London Monarchs. The motif is solid and there’s definitely a sincere connection the 3 Lions and a Lion being the branding. Plus Lions are seen as animal royalty, hence why Monarchs works on two levels (the other being the British Monarchy IRL). I really like the simple and elegant gold/slate gray combo, they’re a great compliment to each other. (180 Words)
PBE Affiliate
Task 12 As a member of the Orange County Otters, I would have to say our biggest rival is the Honolulu Hahalua. Some might say, that doesn't make any sense, because if you want to be the top dog in the ASFC you have to beat the current top dog, the Outlaws. I would agree with you, but both the Otters and Hahalua started their rebuilds at around the same time, and now both are finishing around the same time, with both making the playoffs last season after splitting their games in the regular season, with both teams winning their home games. Unfortunately, the two rival teams didn't face each other in the playoffs, as the Hahalua finished with the top seed in the conference by only one win over the Otters, so this might be a rivalry for the next couple season. Although both teams are near the end of their rebuild, both teams are still built differently, with the Hahalua starting their offensive peak now, with most of the top pieces a season or two away from regression, while for the Otters it is the defense, as their main piece McAlister is now regressing, but with a great young core that are all 3+ seasons away from regressing, the potential for growth even after a playoff level season is insane. These two teams should continue to clash for the next few seasons at least with the strong offense of the Hahalua facing off against the newly stout OCO defense. This rivalry is brand new to the league, as the Otters seemed to dominate the early season of the league, and fell off when the Hahalua took power, now with both teams making their teams playoff ready, it could be a battle between two of the leagues best franchises against eachother with each game being a classic. 306 words Task 34 For the Otters, the rookie that made the most impact was actually a tie between two new defensive studs in the front 7, in captain John Stark VIII and Iosefa Fuamatu-Ma'afala. Both players had outstanding seasons, with Iosefa Fuamatu-Ma'afala earning 1st team all pro honors with 12 sacks, he gave the Otters the up front presence that had been lacking for many seasons, as the Otters have had a strong secondary for a while now but lacked the options to stop the run game, now having a beast up front helped propel the otters to the playoffs. But if we are talking about players that really helped step up the defense, look no further than Stark VIII, as he did it all in his rookie season, 99 tackles, 10 sacks, 2 interceptioons, he was everywhere on the field and help the Otters take many wins that they would of had no business winning a few short seasons ago. 160 words |
|