05-19-2024, 09:02 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-22-2024, 10:02 PM by wetwilleh. Edited 3 times in total.)
S48 is here and any team not named Cape Town Crash can huff my shorts. I look forward to smack talking each of you as the season goes on, but for now, let this media serve as an amuse-bouche. Also, I love you all.
New Orleans Secondline:
1.) There's only one good purple team in this league and it's not you.
2.) Second(in)Line means you'll never be in FirstPlace.
3.) All that TPE on your team makes it look like you are overcompensating for something.
San Jose Sabercats:
1.) "Hey everybody look. They're doing something!"
2.) I find your football skills to be shallow and pedantic.
3.) If SJS was a shape, they would be a trapezoid. And quite frankly, that's a dumb shape. Highly overrated.
Baltimore Hawks:
1.) Birds are stupid and you should feel stupid.
2.) @swoosh, Dino Nuggets are a mid-tier frozen food.
3.) HAWKS is an acronym: Hopeless Awkward Weak Kielbasa Skill-less.
Orange County Otters:
1.) Nice Trades.
Chicago Butchers:
1.) Sim-luck incarnate
2.) Somebody should let the sim team know they accidentally loaded a DSFL team into the ISFL.
3.) Small hands or big cleaver?
Yellowknife Wraiths:
1.) Maybe this is the year? Probably not.
2.) Wraiths? More like WraistOfTime.
3.)
Arizona Outlaws:
1.) Any team that has to call itself a dynasty is no dynasty.
2.) @lemonoppy? More like lemon law. I bet your war room wishes they could get a refund on you.
3.) Lastly, a poem...
I met a traveller from an antique land,
Who said—“Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. . . . Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed;
And on the pedestal, these words appear:
My name is Arizondias, Team of Teams;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.”
Everyone else:
If you're a team who didn't make this list, you can at least rejoice in the fact that people are talking about your fantasy prospects. Bad teams means make for good fantasy players. Silver linings!
New Orleans Secondline:
1.) There's only one good purple team in this league and it's not you.
2.) Second(in)Line means you'll never be in FirstPlace.
3.) All that TPE on your team makes it look like you are overcompensating for something.
San Jose Sabercats:
1.) "Hey everybody look. They're doing something!"
2.) I find your football skills to be shallow and pedantic.
3.) If SJS was a shape, they would be a trapezoid. And quite frankly, that's a dumb shape. Highly overrated.
Baltimore Hawks:
1.) Birds are stupid and you should feel stupid.
2.) @swoosh, Dino Nuggets are a mid-tier frozen food.
3.) HAWKS is an acronym: Hopeless Awkward Weak Kielbasa Skill-less.
Orange County Otters:
1.) Nice Trades.
Chicago Butchers:
1.) Sim-luck incarnate
2.) Somebody should let the sim team know they accidentally loaded a DSFL team into the ISFL.
3.) Small hands or big cleaver?
Yellowknife Wraiths:
1.) Maybe this is the year? Probably not.
2.) Wraiths? More like WraistOfTime.
3.)
Arizona Outlaws:
1.) Any team that has to call itself a dynasty is no dynasty.
2.) @lemonoppy? More like lemon law. I bet your war room wishes they could get a refund on you.
3.) Lastly, a poem...
I met a traveller from an antique land,
Who said—“Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. . . . Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed;
And on the pedestal, these words appear:
My name is Arizondias, Team of Teams;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.”
Everyone else:
If you're a team who didn't make this list, you can at least rejoice in the fact that people are talking about your fantasy prospects. Bad teams means make for good fantasy players. Silver linings!